Regress (The Alliance Chronicles Book 1)

by SF Benson

  No, no, no, no! She couldn’t kill her. My pulse raced. I had no choice but to stay put. Moving would put Ko and the other soldiers in danger.

  “Fine.” Eden stared down at my mother. I saw the tears roll down her cheeks.

  Eden placed the barrel against her temple.

  I squeezed my eyes shut.

  Pop!

  Slowly, I opened my eyes. My breath hitched. Mom lay on the ground. Blood surrounded her head. Some of the cadets in the front row, those who were splattered, vomited where they stood. Eden and her aunt smiled. Bile rose in my throat. My heart hurt and my stomach kept churning. I choked back a sob. This had to be a nightmare. A horrible, horrible nightmare.

  “Troop dismissed,” someone said.

  The commander marched off with Eden in tow.

  The cadets pivoted and marched toward waiting vehicles. Ko elbowed me in my ribs.

  “Come on, soldier. Remember, we’re supposed to return to RMA.”

  My throat ached from my repressed sobs. I had no choice. I left my shattered heart on the ground with my mother.

  “Truth is irrelevant. If you tell someone anything, enough times, they will believe.”

  —Jonathan L. Graves, leader, the American Republic

  Zared

  The group of us—five soldiers, Asher, and I—stood in front of a plain white house in Windsor, Canada. Ripped screens enclosed a shoddy front porch overlooking a bare yard. Malcolm would house us in squatter’s hell. I was chilled to the bone, hungry, and my shoulder throbbed.

  Two soldiers trudged to the rear of the building. Another one removed a key from the mailbox and opened the front door. Asher and I stepped into a small living room. All the comforts of home—a ratty old sofa, a couple of broken down chairs, and some wooden end tables. A musty smell permeated the air. The soldiers returned from the backyard. They made a quick sweep of the upstairs and reported 'all clear.'

  Asher pointed at them. “You two, take the first shift. One up front and one in the back.” He waved his hand at the other soldiers. “You three, take a room.”

  “C’mon, Z.” We walked up the stairs and stopped at a small room with metal bunk beds. “You're on top.” Asher removed a pair of jeans and a dark long-sleeved T-shirt from a dresser and threw them at me.

  I peeled off the combat gear noticing the ugly purple bruise on my shoulder. “You’re busy giving orders. Am I part of your team, too?”

  “For now. Until I get new orders, I’m to treat you like one of the soldiers.”

  My new rank didn’t sit well with me. It was bad enough being an operative with the Alliance. I wasn’t crazy about taking orders from Asher. I stretched out on the bottom bunk. “Have you heard from Malcolm?”

  Asher pulled a dark green T-shirt over a pair of camouflage pants. I bet the guy slept in fatigues. Too damn dedicated. “Not lately. You know he has everyone else do his dirty work.”

  Malcolm Rivera, the Alliance leader, was a Hybrid formerly known as the rapper Ice Pimp. Years ago, he joined the Underground to share his music. When the New Order’s policies became overwhelming, Malcolm joined the Alliance and soon became its leader. He claimed he had a conscience and couldn’t stand to see people suffer. I hadn’t seen him since he warned me about Tru.

  “Ash, I’ve got the card.”

  The pack he held hit the floor. “It’s here?”

  “Yeah.” I put my hands behind my head. “So you want to tell me when we can close this mission?”

  Asher shrugged. “Dude, that’s up to Malcolm. I told you earlier. The mission goes to the next phase.”

  I shook my head. “I want out.”

  Asher pushed my leg over and sat down. “Is this about your girl?”

  “I want a future with her, a normal life without the Alliance.”

  “Oh man, you’ve got it bad.” Asher grinned that crooked smile of his. “Would you turn your back on the Alliance for her? After all they’ve done for you?”

  “Look, I’m grateful to them. Getting Intrepid paid my debt. I’m done, man.”

  “How long do you think you two will last without the Alliance? We can keep you safe. As soon as the New Order knows you’re in the wind, you’re dead.”

  I closed my eyes. “Then, tell me what to do? Y’know I’m not giving Tru up.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that.” The deep voice from the hall startled me.

  A tall guy the color of desert sand with pale blue eyes stood in the door. Malcolm. He hadn’t shaved in a while. Despite the weather, he wore a sleeveless shirt displaying his tatts. He strode into the room and straddled a chair.

  “Malcolm.” I wasn’t talking about Tru with him. No one discussed anything with Malcolm anyway. He told you what he wanted, and you did it.

  “Jones, don’t you have something to do?” He didn’t take his eyes off me.

  “I’ll be downstairs.” Asher glanced back at me as he walked out of the room.

  Malcolm scowled. “So what’s going on with you, Aoki?”

  “Nothing.” I sat up.

  The veins throbbed in his neck. “Don’t screw with me.”

  I would play the game, but stand my ground. I could hold my own against him. Intimidation wouldn’t work. This time. “Trust me that’s not happening.”

  His mouth twisted. “You could have jeopardized the mission.”

  I rolled my shoulders. “But I didn’t.”

  “You have the card?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Good.” Malcolm nodded. “Hold on to it. I’ll let you know who to give it to real soon.”

  “I want out, Malcolm.”

  “I heard you. You think you want a future with the girl.”

  “I know I want a future with Tru. I’m not giving her up.”

  “Whatever.” He blew out his breath, rattling his lips. “You’re valuable to the cause. I can’t let you just walk away.”

  I lowered my feet to the floor and glanced at Malcolm. His eyes blazed with fury. Now might be the wrong time to go up against him. Rumors flourished about Malcolm killing scores of people before joining the Underground. He wasn’t intimidating me. I just liked to pick my battles. Tru’s safety came before my confronting this asshole. I wondered what he would do if I walked away? Kill me? Possibly.

  “Then, what do I do?”

  Malcolm sucked his teeth. A shiver crept down my spine. “Keep being a good little operative. You help the cause. We help you. I’ll send in help to get your girl. Just know you’ll owe us. Again.”

  I was speechless. I hated how Malcolm, and a few others, liked to remind me of how the Alliance saved my ass. I didn’t need constant reminders. My needing them to save Tru and Ko added to my debt. I’d play this game one last time. Revise my exit strategy and wait for the day of my reckoning.

  Malcolm stood. “I’m glad we had this little talk. Good to know you’ll be sticking it out with us. And about your girl…”

  I stared up at him.

  “When the time’s right, we’ll make it right for you.”

  “Law cannot be concerned with justice.”

  —Emma Blackburn-Douglas, leader, the American Republic

  I sat on the bottom bunk in Ko’s room at the Academy. The scene was on auto replay in my head.

  Eden placed the gun’s barrel to Mom’s head and pulled the trigger.

  Pop!

  Blood splattered on anyone standing nearby. Mom’s body slumped to the ground. Her blood stained the grass red.

  Eden, that bitch, and her cold-hearted aunt walked away smiling.

  My body tremored.

  That’s all I did. Shake like a leaf blowing in the wind. The world around me slowed down. I waited for someone to kick-start it. Bring me back up to speed.

  Eden’s aunt would celebrate the pain shooting through me like a shaft of cold and bitter steel. It stretched all over my body, leaping, jumping, and freezing my skin. My heart, my head, my stomach, my throat. Everything ached, but the tears refused to fall. I wanted to scream at t
he top of my lungs. Mom was dead, and Ko said I couldn’t scream nor cry. Thanks to her damned orders, I was incapable of expressing my grief. My family was gone. Wiped clean from my life, leaving me all alone, and it hurt. Oh, God, it hurt so damn much…

  Ko had a sparsely decorated north-facing room—two bunk beds, a double chest, a closet, and a couple of small desks with touch screens. It wasn’t quite like home... Home. A place I’d never see again. No one to greet me with a hot cooked meal. No one to chew me out about being reckless. I hugged myself and fell back on a pillow. No amount of crying would erase my pain. Getting even might help.

  My drill sergeant sat beside me. “I’m so sorry, Tru.”

  The last thing I wanted was Ko’s sympathy. I swallowed the bile rising up my throat. Mom would tell me I should be grateful to Ko for getting me off that island, not angry. I had to endure this to reunite with Zared.

  “Where are the guys?”

  “At the safe house.”

  “When do we leave?”

  “Soon.” She stood and walked to the chest.

  “Why can’t we leave now?” I whined.

  “Once I hear from my contacts, we can leave.” Ko, dressed in fatigues, pulled clothing out of a drawer.

  “And how long will we have to wait?” My voice sounded flat and distant.

  “I know this is hard on you.” Ko glanced at her phone. “And I’m very sorry for what you’re going through. Zared shouldn’t have included you in this, but we’ll get through it.”

  People needed to stop blaming him. I volunteered to help him. At any point, I could have walked away, and I didn’t. Ko dropped some fatigues in my lap. “Go ahead and change. We’ll be leaving sometime tonight.”

  Get it together. If I didn’t want to end up like my family, I had to focus. So, I did the only thing I could do. I pushed my pain back. I pushed it into the furthest corner possible. And then, I covered it up so it wouldn’t see the light of day. I stood and undressed.

  “Ko, your CO—”

  “You don’t have to say it. I have no idea what happened between her and your mother. I swear I’ll get to the bottom of it. Eden and her aunt will pay for what they did.”

  I nodded. Ko didn’t have to promise me anything. It was just a matter of time. I didn’t care how long it took. “Did you happen to get proof of what’s going on downstairs?”

  “The lab?” Ko nodded. “I pulled it as soon as we found it.” She walked over to the corner desk, reached underneath, removed a SIM card, and placed it in her shirt pocket.

  I tucked the olive green T-shirt into my camouflage pants. “Have you heard from your contact?”

  “Yes. Malcolm is getting us out himself.”

  “Who’s that?” I shoved my feet into my boots.

  “I told you about him.” Ko rolled her eyes. “Remember, the leader of the Alliance?”

  “Umm…yeah.” I really hadn’t paid attention earlier. Maybe being a captive and worrying about my future distracted me a bit.

  “Normally he has someone else handle these things.”

  “Whatever.”

  Ko’s mouth fell open.

  “What? Am I supposed to be happy about it?”

  She shrugged her shoulders and returned to checking her supply of ammunition. “You could be a little grateful.”

  “I am.” I bent down and tied my shoelaces. I replaced my knife inside the boot.

  “You have a funny way of showing it,” Ko muttered.

  I guessed there was something between Ko and this Malcolm. Honestly, I didn’t care. “I am very grateful for what he’s done. Right now, I’m concerned about the guys.”

  “They’ve been in contact.”

  Finally, something I needed to know. “Are they okay?”

  “Yes.”

  My heart healed just a bit. Perhaps I should feign interest in the Alliance’s leader. It might allow me to see Zared sooner.

  “Tell me more about Malcolm.”

  “He used to be this dynamic rapper.” Ko’s eyes lit up. “Then he turned activist. Now, he’s using his intelligence and charisma for a greater good. There aren’t enough words to describe him.”

  “If I didn’t know any better, Koko Castaneda, I’d say you have a crush on him.”

  She stopped filling a backpack. A corner of her mouth lifted. “Who wouldn’t? The man’s gorgeous. You’ll see.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “Better than Asher?”

  Ko blushed. “That’s different.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me about him?”

  “There was nothing to tell.” She fumbled with the backpack’s zipper. “We were just friends before I came here. Then…well…let’s just say my relationship earned me a reprimand.”

  “Wait, I don’t get it.” I rubbed my forehead. “Having a relationship is against the rules?”

  “It’s hierarchy protocol. I’m in officer training. Asher’s a sergeant. If you’re breaking the rules, no one should know.”

  I leaned against the bunk bed and crossed my arms. This was getting interesting. “How did you get exposed?”

  She made a face. “CO Bartlett came by my room. Asher was leaving the room.”

  I opened my mouth.

  Ko held her hand up. “It was five in the morning.”

  The corners of my mouth quirked up. The little devil!

  She closed the drawer and walked over to me carrying two pistols. “It was just the one time. No judgments okay?”

  “You won’t get any from me.” I sat down.

  “Good. We have to talk about you and Zared, though.”

  “Is this necessary?” I didn’t need to hear from someone else against our relationship.

  She placed the guns on the bed. “Don’t take it the wrong way, but you are a distraction.”

  “What are you talking about?” I averted my eyes.

  “The Street Wars and the Revolution broke our country. It changed things for us.” Ko leaned back on the bed. “Some good. Some bad. Freedom is no longer an option. The Alliance wants to fix that. Zared agreed to help with the mission, but you entered the picture. He jeopardized our cause and risked your life.”

  “What is it with you people? Did someone outlaw relationships?”

  “No, but this is about timing. Right now, our world is too screwed up to be concerned about your love life.”

  “You’re wrong.” I fingered one of the weapons. “Relationships, family, love. We have to fight for those things. They’re what matters.”

  Ko held her hands behind her back. “Let’s get the New Order out of office first. I think you’d agree they’ve screwed things up royally telling people who to marry and which kids get to live. Do you want them dictating your life?”

  “Of course not. That’s part of the reason why I agreed to help Zared.”

  “Keep that in mind. You can help him better if you understand your place.”

  “My place?” This conversation just turned ugly.

  “You’re not an operative. You’re not Riza. You’re a civilian.”

  I glared at her. “That’s not fair, Ko. Civilian or not, I’ve been through a lot of shit to help your mission. I can protect myself. Thanks to Eden, Zared is all I have. I won’t give him up.”

  “And you don’t have to. We just need you to make some choices. Be strong. And, if things should go wrong, be prepared.”

  “For what?”

  “Are you willing to die for our cause?”

  “I—”

  “No, you never thought about it, but it could happen. And, furthermore, you need to learn to follow orders. You can’t just do whatever you want.”

  So it was about taming me. No way. Time to find out Ko’s agenda. I crossed my arms. “And will you be the one giving those orders?

  “For you? Yes. And Asher too.”

  “You enjoy having power?”

  Ko smiled. “Yes, I won’t deny it. Who wants to be powerless? Being weak allows others to run your life. I choose my own destiny. No one
else.”

  “And what is your destiny?”

  “To lead of course. Riza represents the worst part of the New Order. But Riza gave me the chance to discover my strength, leadership. Even Malcolm recognizes I’m a leader. Riza tested my skills. With the Alliance, I get to use my skills. I’m not giving that up for no one.”

  “What about Asher?”

  “What about him?” She quirked her head toward me.

  “What if he asked you to give it up?”

  “Won’t happen.”

  My eyes narrowed. “How do you know?”

  “Because he asked me to give up on you.”

  I did a double take. “What?”

  “He had the perfect opportunity to get Intrepid himself. End of mission. But I told him we had to save you and Zared.”

  “Honest?”

  “Honest.” Ko sat beside me. “But I have to do my job, Tru. I give orders and expect them to be carried out. It can be no different with you. You’ll see, this will work. You don’t have to sit on the sideline. You can be a part of the Alliance.”

  “Was that your recruitment speech?”

  “Yes.” Ko raised her chin. “Train as an operative. We can teach you valuable things.”

  “What kind of things?”

  “Combat training, sharpshooting, surveillance.”

  “You would do that for me?” I looked at my friend, waiting for the conditions.

  She nodded. “You would be helping the cause. Once we get out of here, I’ll talk to Asher. He’ll be training you.”

  “Why can’t you do it?”

  “Protocol, Tru. It’s all about following rules.”

  And there’s the condition. “You’ve always been good at obeying them.”

  Ko went to the window. “It wouldn’t hurt you to follow my example.”

  I tapped my foot. “What is that supposed to mean?”

  “No offense Tru, but not following the rules has always been your problem.”

  “Say what?”

  “Hear me out.” Ko held up her hands. “If you hadn’t missed curfew, you wouldn’t have reunited with Zared. If you followed the rules, you would have returned to my parents’ house, called your parents, and stayed overnight. You agreed to help him without getting a complete understanding of what he was involved in. Once again, you didn’t follow the rules. Most people tend to think things through before jumping into danger. You don’t.”