by Donna Fasano
For some reason, the fact that he'd mentioned her first made her go all warm and sentimental. She didn't know what to say, so she didn't say anything.
At that moment the boys bounded into the kitchen.
"Are we goin' now?"
"Is it time to go?"
The boys spoke at the same time.
"Whoa, there," Cassie said. "Into the dining room for breakfast, first. March!"
"Awww!" they both groaned.
"Now." Joshua joined in Cassie's cause. "Eat first, then we shop."
Cassie guided Eric into the dining room and he slipped into his chair. He took a big gulp of the milk his sister poured for him.
"Am I really going to get a new mitt?" He whispered the question so that only Cassie could hear.
The excitement and anticipation twinkling in his eyes nearly made her cry. The milky mustache smeared above his upper lip nearly made her laugh.
Smiling warmly, she nodded her assurance and then handed him a napkin.
"I'll be right back," she told them. "I have to get the bagels."
She entered the kitchen just as Joshua was taking the pan from the oven.
"You shouldn't have to do that," she said, hurrying across the room.
"I don't mind." He tugged off the oven mitt.
She reached for the plate at the same moment he did. His fingers grazed hers as they grasped the rim of the plate. The heat of him sent shock waves jolting through her. Her eyes sought and found his.
His gaze expressed an open affection the strength of which nearly knocked her to her knees. His freshly shaven face was so handsome, she could have stared at him all day long. A hint of his cologne only intensified the feeling. In that instant she wanted to reach out and smooth the pad of her thumb across his sexy bottom lip, lean over the plate of bagels and kiss him to within an inch of his life.
She blinked twice, her tongue darting out to moisten her cotton-dry lips. The desire she felt was showing in her eyes, on her face, in the set of her body– she was certain of it. But she felt helpless to stop it, because it seemed as though the fantasy she'd spent the past few days creating was somehow getting caught up in the reality of this moment.
With his free hand, he captured her chin between his thumb and the knuckle of his index finger. "I know how you're feeling," he said, his voice sounding on the edge of control. "Because I'm feeling it too."
They stood there for a long breathless moment, and Cassie realized that he was waiting for a sign, some signal from her as to whether he could move forward or if she wanted him to back off.
God, how she wanted him to make that decision on his own! Because she knew if he were to go with his feelings, he would surely kiss her. She wanted to grouse at him for being such a gentleman.
Slowly, after much silent deliberation, she came to understand that she was not yet ready to cross that unseen line that would take her ever so close to her fantasy world. She lowered her gaze.
"The boys are waiting." Her tone was coarse with regret and she knew he heard it. She could kick herself. The opportunity had been right there at her fingertips had she only taken it.
With utmost courtesy, he remained silent and moved away from her. She didn't know if there was disappointment showing on his features because she couldn't bring herself to look at his face.
Breakfast was a rushed affair as Andy and Eric chattered away about the prospective shopping trip. Afterward, she sent them upstairs to make their beds and clean up their rooms while she loaded the dishwasher and put away the leftover fruit and juice.
Joshua went out to pull the car out of the garage, and after he'd gone, Cassie felt an unmistakable emptiness in the room that filled her with a fresh sense of remorse that she'd let the intimate moment before breakfast pass her by.
~ ~ ~
The boys hadn't stopped talking the entire way to the mall. They'd bounced from one topic to another and then back again. Cassie was relieved that their innocent bantering had kept all four of them occupied and held at bay that awkward tension she'd expected between her and Joshua.
They entered the main entrance directly across from the sporting goods store. Eric and Andy rushed ahead.
"I've never seen Andrew so excited about anything," Joshua said.
"Eric too." She snared his gaze with serious eyes. "I can't tell you what this means to him. It's been years since he's been shopping for anything other than the very basic necessities."
"I want to do it," he insisted lightly as he propelled her into the store with a hand placed at the small of her back.
The next half hour was spent examining gloves of various shapes and sizes. The sales clerk relayed a variety of information regarding every aspect of a baseball glove: leather versus manmade material, a solid cup versus interlaced webbing, hand-sewn versus machine-made.
Finally, Eric looked up at Cassie and said, "Boy, this woman sure knows a lot."
Cassie nodded. "I never knew there were so many things to consider when buying a baseball mitt."
The boys made their choices. Joshua allowed them to pick out a new baseball and they all went to the register to pay for the items.
"It's been such a pleasure to wait on you," the woman commented as she punched buttons on the computerized register. "We don't usually see the whole family come in."
Cassie went still.
The sales clerk addressed the boys. "I've never seen brothers look so different from one another."
Darting a glance at the boys, Cassie was surprised by the pure glee written on both their faces at having been mistakenly identified as brothers.
Pointing at Andy, the saleswoman said, "With your red hair and dark eyes, you look just like your father." Then she turned her attention to Eric. "And you look like your mother."
Cassie felt she should set the woman straight, but she glanced at Joshua and he gave a little shrug.
The woman smiled first at Joshua and then at Cassie. "You two must be very proud of your little family."
"We certainly are."
Joshua's response flowed from him like a smooth-running stream. Cassie's lips parted in silent surprise. The most charming, teasing glint lit his eyes.
She looked from Joshua to Eric to Andy. The three of them were truly enjoying being mistaken as a family unit. Cassie wished she, too, could enjoy the situation, but this was too, too close to the fantasy she'd conjured. The scene made her a little ill at ease.
The saleswoman handed Joshua his credit card and his receipt. She put the gloves in separate bags and held them out to the boys.
"Thanks," Eric told her. He looked up at Joshua. "Thank you too."
"Yeah, Dad," Andy chimed in. "Thanks!"
As they went out of the mall into the warm, sunny day, Joshua suggested, "Let's go to the park and you two can try out your new gloves."
The boys cheered their approval.
"Cassie?" Joshua raised his brows inquiringly.
"Sure," she said. "But, Andy, you'll need to let me know if you begin to feel sick or you have trouble breathing. Do you have your inhaler?"
"Right here." Andy patted his pocket.
Joshua parked the car and the four of them found an out-of-the-way spot that was open and flat. The boys distanced themselves from each other and Eric tossed his ball to Andy.
Cassie's heart sang when she heard the sound of the boys' laughter. It was so good to see them playing outdoors in the fresh air and wide, open spaces.
Glancing at Joshua, she noticed how intently he watched his son, a small frown of concentration drawing his brows together slightly.
"It's okay," she tried to assure him. "We'll watch him closely. Let's go sit on the bench."
"We probably shouldn't stay long," he said.
"I agree," she said, settling herself on the wooden bench. "But Andy's so excited to be here."
"Yes. And that excitement alone could cause an asthma attack."
The stress in his tone prompted her to reach out and touch his forearm. "We'll w
atch him," she repeated gently. "And he's got his inhaler."
He didn't respond. When she made to pull her hand away, he stopped her by sliding his fingers overtop of hers.
"I'm sorry, Cassie," he said. "Really. This is all new for me. Andrew is usually safe and sound at the house. I never had to worry about him..." He let his statement trail off and sighed deeply.
"Well..." Cassie began hesitantly "...you may have thought you had nothing to worry about, but..."
"But what?"
She darted a glance at Andy some distance away and she reluctantly came to a decision. Turning back to Joshua, she lowered her tone so that only he could hear, and relayed the events of her first meeting with Andy– up in the tree with the kitten.
"You're kidding me? Andrew was up in that tree?" Joshua asked, incredulity clearly expressed in his features. "With a cat?"
Cassie could only nod.
"Hell, he could have broken his neck," he said. "And he's allergic to cats. He knows better. You should have told me. I would have–"
"Now don't get angry," she pleaded. "I scolded him about it. We had a good talk. He knows he made a terrible mistake. The only reason I told you about it is because it's normal for a child to test his limits. Wouldn't you rather loosen his reins a little and be aware of what he's doing, rather than him continuing to test his limits all on his own?"
Joshua watched his son toss the baseball to Eric, who just missed catching it. Lifting his hand, Joshua scrubbed at the back of his neck.
She sensed his dark eyes on her and she directed her gaze to his, waiting for his response.
"You're right," he finally murmured. Then he shook his head ruefully. "But I'm going to need some help with this, I don't mind telling you."
Without hesitation, Cassie gently squeezed his arm and smiled. "That's why I'm here."
~ ~ ~
Later that evening, Cassie smoothed body lotion over the heel, ankle, and calf of first one leg, then the other. She rubbed the residual cream on her elbows.
What does one wear to a summer cocktail party? Before Joshua had left this afternoon to spend some time in his lab at the university, she'd asked him just that question. His response had been, "Upscale casual." She interpreted that to mean not too dressy, yet not too casual. Which left her wondering, What does one wear to a summer cocktail party?
Scowling, she inspected the clothes hanging in her closet and muttered, "You didn't help a bit, Joshua."
The little black skirt she pulled out was years and years old, but the A-line design made it timeless. And Cassie decided her royal blue blouse would look nice with the skirt. The blouse wasn't made of silk, but the soft rayon was clingy and flattering.
She slipped her feet into royal blue heels that she'd purchased off the final clearance rack at a discount outlet last summer, and then she stood in front of the mirror to scrutinize how she looked.
The bold blue of the blouse accentuated her eyes. A little mascara only added to the effect. She brushed her hair until it shone with glossy highlights and decided at the last minute not to pin it up but to let it swing freely down her back.
As she placed the hairbrush on the dresser, she let her mind rove over the wonderful morning she'd spent with Joshua and the boys. The four of them had been like a real family.
She had felt all fuzzy and homey as she'd sat on the park bench with Joshua and watched Andy and Eric play at the park. Soon, though, Andy had enticed his father to participate. Cassie had sat there only a few moments before she, too, decided to join in the fun. The couple of hours they'd spent at the park had been as close to heaven as Cassie had ever been.
And here she was about to step out onto the clouds of heaven again. A night out with Joshua. The mere thought made her skin go all prickly.
She concentrated on applying a light coat of lipstick and then went to check on the boys.
Hearing their murmured voices in Andy's room, she knocked on his door and then opened it. The boys looked up from a comic book they'd been discussing.
"Are you two all ready for bed?" she asked, but she could plainly see that both boys were wearing their pajamas.
"It's nearly time for me to go," she told them. "Joshua should be home soon. While he changes his clothes, I'm going to drive over and pick up Mary, so you two won't be alone."
"Aw-ww," Eric lamented. "We're too big for a babysitter."
Cassie grinned. "Don't think of it as a night with a babysitter. Think of it as a visit with Mary."
The boys exchanged a pained look that had her chuckling. "You two better be good," she cautioned. She heard the front door open and her stomach flip-flopped. "I'll be right back."
She hurried down the stairs. "Hi," she said.
Joshua smiled at her and Cassie felt bombarded by an energy force strong enough to brighten the lights in the room.
"I stopped on my way home and picked up Aunt Mary," he said. "I thought I'd save you a trip."
How considerate of him, she thought, then she realized that she hadn't even noticed Mary standing there by the door.
"Mary, how are you?" she asked, hurrying to take the older woman's sweater.
"I'm doing great," Mary said. "I was so happy when you asked me to watch the boys. It will be nice to spend some time with them."
"Well, I'm going to run upstairs and take a quick shower." Joshua nodded to his aunt and threw Cassie a quick wink before he left the room.
"Have you eaten dinner, Mary?" Cassie asked.
"Oh, yes. Let's just sit and have a little chat."
Cassie spent the next twenty minutes or so dodging Mary's gently probing questions. How could she explain to Mary how she felt about Joshua when she didn't know herself? If she even attempted to verbalize the physical aspects of how she desired him, or the intense attraction that seemed to literally pull them together like a force of nature– why, the older woman would probably keel over in a swoon. Avoiding Mary's more personal questions, at least for the time being, was her only option.
When Joshua entered the living room, she turned to face him with every intention of smiling. But at the sight of him– his freshly shaven face, his brown eyes glinting with anticipation, his wavy red hair still damp from his shower– she could only stare silently.
"Is something wrong?" he asked, a look of concern shadowing his features.
"Wrong?" The word came out sounding breathless and weak as she wondered, What could be wrong with someone so utterly perfect in every way? Shrugging one shoulder, she stated frankly, "Nothing's wrong. It's just that you look so... good."
She let her eyes travel the length of him. His navy blazer hugged his shoulders provocatively and went nicely with his tawny-colored trousers. His white dress shirt and navy print silk tie would have looked mundane and ordinary on any other man, but he filled it out in such a way that it made her want to loosen the tie and unfasten the shirt buttons to see what pleasures were hidden beneath.
Then she heard him chuckle– a low, seductive sound. She couldn't stop her face from flaming; not because of what she'd said to him, which was the honest truth, but from what she'd thought.
"It's nice to be appreciated," he said. One corner of his mouth turned up in a grin. "And I didn't mention it before, but you look good too."
Something about the way he said the word good, along with the hungry look in his eyes, told her he really thought she looked better than good– much better. She smiled, gazing at him almost invitingly. Her tongue darted to moisten her bottom lip. Suddenly she realized she was actually flirting with him. And enjoying herself immensely.
"Why don't you two get on your way?"
Cassie nearly gasped aloud when Mary spoke. Heaven above, this little byplay between herself and Joshua had put Mary completely out of Cassie's mind.
"That's a good idea," Joshua said. "Cassie?"
She stood and, without hesitation, took Joshua's outreached hand.
"I've already said goodnight to the boys for both of us," he told her. Then he turned
to Mary. "We won't be too late."
"Please," Mary stressed, "don't hurry on my account. Just have a good time."
Joshua opened the car door for Cassie and she hesitated before getting inside. Gazing up at him in the moonlight, she touched the tips of her fingers to the back of his hand where it rested on the top of the door.
"I want to thank you for asking me to the party tonight," she said, her tone conveying the candor she felt. "You know I was a little hesitant about accepting, but I'm glad I did."
"So am I."
His mouth pulled back in the barest of smiles and the golden flecks of his deep brown eyes danced with an anticipation that made Cassie's heart thump wildly under her rib cage.
"We're going to have a good time tonight," he promised.
She thanked the stars twinkling overhead that the drive to the party would be short. Joshua had told her that the host of the party lived barely five miles away, near Stringer's Pond.
The air in the close confines of the car was thick with anticipation and some other unnameable tension. Well, unnameable wasn't exactly correct; Cassie knew what it was that had the atmosphere so dense that she could hardly breathe, but she wasn't yet ready to face the sheer sensuality that pulled at every fiber of her being.
Joshua turned onto Pond Circle, the narrow road that looped the small, irregular-shaped pond. When he pulled to the side of the road and cut the engine, her gaze swung around, questioning him.
"Do you mind–" he looked toward the water and then back at her "–if we take a little walk by the pond?" His face took on a sheepish expression as he continued. "I'd like to enjoy a few minutes alone with you before I have to share your company with everyone else."
She found his request alluring. What she really wanted was to skip the party and the walk and find some other way to enjoy the night. She wanted to touch him, wanted to be touched by him. She was relieved that the dark interior of the car hid her in shadows because she knew the desire she felt was plainly written on her face.
"I'd like that," she told him.
They met at the front of the car and Joshua held out his hand to her. She took it as though it were the most natural thing in the world. And when she found it difficult to walk in heels across the uneven grassy ground, he offered her his arm, and she moved closer, holding onto him tightly.
