Gold in the Fire and Light in the Storm

by Margaret Daley

  “But after only a few weeks, you saw something.” Samuel skirted the table and took her briefcase from her to carry to her car.

  “It’s because Jane reminds me of myself at her age.”

  “You mentioned something about that before. You had the same kind of problems in school as my daughter?” He started for the foyer.

  “Yes. I struggled for years. Actually I still do. I changed to trying to learn Portuguese on tape, but I’m not doing as well as I’d hoped. I have a hard time hearing the different sounds. I’m hoping when I live in a country it will come faster to me.”

  “I didn’t know.”

  “Not many people do. I don’t broadcast my difficulties, just as Jane doesn’t. Here I am a perfectly intelligent woman and I can’t seem to learn a foreign language. It’s not something I want everyone to know, so I guess we all have our secrets.”

  “But you shared yours with me.”

  “To help you to understand Jane better and why she kept so much to herself and didn’t ask you for help. Haven’t you had a problem you haven’t asked another soul for help with?”

  The frown that touched his features, his look that sliced away told Beth the answer to that question. He had his secrets, too.

  Samuel busied himself by retrieving Beth’s wool coat from the closet. He helped her to slip into the garment, then reached around to open the front door. “Are you sure I can’t pay you for your tutoring?”

  “No. We’ve been through this before, Samuel. I don’t want your money. I’m doing this for Jane.”

  “Then at least let me take you out for dinner.”

  “I don’t—”

  “Please, Beth. Do this for me. I feel like I should do something for you.”

  She paused on the porch, looking back at Samuel framed in the doorway with the light behind him and his features in the shadows. Dinner? Like a real date? The reason she hadn’t pushed him to speak about his personal life, even though she needed to know details to help him, was that she had felt it would be a mistake. The more she found out about Samuel, the more she liked him and he didn’t fit into her future plans at all, especially with his ready-made family. Besides, how could she compare to his high school sweetheart, whom he had loved so much that his grief had thrown his life into turmoil, as a few of his comments had indicated?

  “You don’t have to do a thing. But if it’s important to you, I’ll go to dinner with you.” The second she agreed to go out with him, a damp layer of perspiration coated her face even though it was chilly outside.

  A date! What would she wear? What would they talk about? They had already exhausted every topic concerning current events. She needed help.

  “Great. How about Saturday night? We could go to dinner and a movie. I’ll pick you up at seven—and wear something nice.”

  “Okay. Where are we going?”

  “It’s a surprise.”

  “But—”

  “No, Beth, I’m not going to tell you, but it will be a special place. That is the least I can do for you.”

  A surprise? She wasn’t good with surprises, but the firm line of his jaw told her no amount of pleading would get the name of the restaurant out of him. She reached for her briefcase. “I can find my way to my car. Stay inside where it’s warm.”

  When her hand clasped the handle, his brushed across her knuckles, sending sparks up her arm. She snatched her briefcase and spun about, hurrying down the steps. He remained in the doorway, watching her retreat. Not until she had backed out of his driveway did he close the front door.

  Her hand shook on the steering wheel and a thin layer of perspiration still covered her face. It was way too hot in her car, and she didn’t even have the heater on. She should have removed her coat before climbing into the Jeep.

  The minute she arrived at her house, she rushed to the phone and called Jesse. “Help! I have a date.”

  “Okay. This isn’t the end of the world, Beth. Zoey and I will help you find something to wear.” Jesse opened the door to a chic dress shop along Main Street.

  “I love to shop for clothes. This will be fun.” Zoey followed Beth into the store, bringing up the rear.

  “It may be fun for you two, but not for me. I don’t like to shop.” Beth scanned the racks and racks of clothing and hated the thought of trying on one dress after another. It had always made her feel so fat. “I’m not easy to fit. If it’s right on the top, it isn’t on the bottom.”

  “We all have something to contend with. I have a hard time finding clothes short enough. Not every place carries petite.” Zoey went straight for the after-five dresses and began looking through them.

  Jesse checked out the nice pantsuits, while Beth stood in the middle of the store, probably looking lost if the expression on the saleswoman’s face was any indication.

  She hurried over to Beth. “May I be of help?”

  “I’m just browsing.”

  Zoey turned toward the saleswoman. “She needs a special dress for a dinner date to a nice restaurant. Any suggestions?”

  The older woman stepped back and allowed her gaze to trek down Beth’s length. When she reestablished eye contact with Beth, she said, “I have a black number that would look great on you. We just received it and it’s still in the back. Let me get it for you.”

  Zoey came to stand beside Beth while Jesse continued to look. “Black would look good on you.”

  “But I always wear black and gray. I need something different. Isn’t that the object of this shopping trip? I have several nice black dresses at home.” Because she’d heard once that black was slimming, she added silently.

  “There are times black is appropriate. I’ve seen your black dresses and they aren’t nice enough. Too practical. For a dinner at a nice restaurant black can be just right.”

  “With the right touches,” Jesse added, throwing them a glance over her shoulder.

  When the saleswoman walked out holding a short black dress on a hanger, its soft folds falling in a graceful pattern, Beth knew it was perfect for her—if only it fit. She took it from the older woman and headed for the dressing room. After slipping the black outfit over her head, she faced the mirror while struggling with the zipper in back. Zipping it up, she assessed herself. For once she believed that black was a slimming color.

  The silk material fell in soft folds to below her knees, disguising her thighs. She immediately thought of the black shoes she had worn to her party at the end of January. They would be perfect with the dress. Its scooped neckline and thin spaghetti straps screamed for something around her neck, though. She thought of her limited jewelry and wasn’t sure what she would wear to complement the outfit.

  When she stepped out of the dressing room, she found both Zoey and Jesse waiting. In Zoey’s hand was a red feather boa.

  She handed it to Beth. “This will be perfect with it. Drape it around your neck.”

  Beth waved her hand toward the red boa. “I can’t wear that!”

  “Yes, you can. You wanted something different. This is different.” Zoey draped it around Beth’s neck, then moved back to evaluate the outfit. “This will knock his socks off.”

  Beth’s eyes grew wide. “I don’t want to knock our minister’s socks off.”

  “Why not? He’s single and eligible. You’re single and eligible. Perfect.” Jesse slowly circled her with her finger against her chin. “Yes, I believe, Zoey, that’s the perfect touch.”

  “What was I thinking, bringing you two to help me shop for something to wear?”

  “That we have good taste and won’t steer you in the wrong direction.” Zoey turned Beth around and gently pushed her toward the dressing room. “She’ll take all of it,” she said to the saleswoman.

  “Next we need to visit my hair salon,” Jesse called out as Beth disappeared into the room.

  Beth rolled her eyes and wondered what had come over her when she had called Jesse for help. Insanity, she decided as she donned her gray wool pantsuit with its white long-sleev
ed shirt. Red! She never wore red!

  The doorbell rang promptly at seven. Running her hand through her new shorter hair that framed her face and fell to just below her chin in soft curls, Beth took one last look at herself in the mirror and drew in a deep, cleansing breath as though that would fortify her for the rest of the evening. Why hadn’t she dated more? The answer was that for so many years she had been wrapped up in raising a family and she hadn’t had much time. Then most of the men she’d known had become unavailable and the available ones she’d known too well to want to date them. Now her inexperience left her a nervous wreck. Would her stomach ever stop roiling long enough for her to enjoy the dinner?

  Beth quickly made her way to the foyer, checked to see if it was Samuel, then opened the front door. “Come in. I need to get my wrap. Is it cold outside?”

  Samuel’s face lit with a smile as his gaze took in her attire. “Actually we have a breeze from the south and it’s not too bad for March.”

  Backing toward the coat closet, Beth noted that Samuel was wearing a dark gray suit with a red tie. She fingered the red boa draped around her neck and hanging down her front. His gaze was riveted to her hand on it.

  “I like that,” he said, his voice low.

  Its sound slipped down the length of her, warming every inch. Both of them had worn something red. She felt a kinship with him that surprised her, as though the color bonded them, when it really was something else—intangible, undefinable. With her gaze connected to his, Beth fumbled for her black coat with its fur collar.

  Samuel stepped forward. “Here, let me get it for you.” He reached around her, his arm brushing against hers, and snatched her coat off its hanger.

  As he held it for her, Beth murmured, “Thank you.” She was aware of him behind her, his breath fanning her neck. Her eyes slid closed and she breathed in his distinctive aftershave.

  “You’re beautiful tonight,” he whispered close to her ear.

  For the first time she actually felt beautiful. She knew she really wasn’t, but his words touched her deeply, causing her pulse to race. She could not remember having a male say those words to her except her brothers when they had been young boys or when they had been trying to get something from her.

  “Jesse and Zoey went shopping with me. Actually they insisted I go shopping with them and wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

  “Who thought of this red boa?”

  “Zoey. She loves red and gravitates toward anything red in a store.” Beth gestured toward his tie. “Who picked out your red tie?”

  A cloud descended over his expression. “My wife. Red was her favorite color.”

  “Oh” was all Beth could manage to say, heat suffusing her face. Her cheeks must rival her red boa, she thought.

  The smile that graced Samuel’s mouth seemed forced as he asked, “What is your favorite color?”

  Beth grinned, not wanting the evening to start off awkwardly. “Yellow. I think some people probably think it’s black or gray, because that’s what I wear a lot, but I love what yellow represents—sunshine.”

  “Mine is green and I have no reason for liking it except that I’ve always felt that way since I was a little boy.”

  Beth moved toward the front door. “Are you going to tell me where we’re going to eat dinner now?”

  “Nope. It’s a surprise. You’ll know when we pull up to the restaurant.”

  “You know I don’t like surprises.”

  “I’m still not going to tell you. I like to surprise people.” Samuel pulled the door closed behind him and made sure it was locked before guiding Beth toward his Mustang, which was parked in her drive.

  As Samuel backed out onto the street, Beth still felt the impression of his fingers at the small of her back as he’d led her to his car. Her excitement grew as she thought of all the places they could be going. She rarely went out to eat except to a fast-food restaurant or Alice’s Café. It had to be a very nice restaurant, since he wanted her to dress up—which excluded those places and most of the other ones in Sweetwater.

  When he drove into the parking lot at the side of the best, most expensive restaurant in the county, she was at a loss for words. In all her years in Sweetwater she had never set foot inside, because she couldn’t afford to eat at the place. That hadn’t stopped her from dreaming about having dinner at Andre’s.

  “I think you’ve made a mistake,” she said, turning slightly to face him in the car.

  “A mistake?”

  “Andre’s is very expensive.”

  “I know. You won’t accept money for tutoring Jane, so this is the next best thing. I want to show you how much I appreciate all the time you’ve spent working with my daughter.”

  “But—”

  He pressed his fingers to her lips. “No buts, Beth. This evening is all about you.”

  The feel of his touch melted any reservations she had. How could she refuse?

  When he escorted her into the restaurant she scanned the dimly lit room with elegantly set tables, the crystal and china gleaming in the candlelight. An arrangement of white roses adorned each table and gold utensils picked up the gold in the cream-colored china. She’d never seen anything so richly decorated except in a magazine.

  After they were shown to a table set in an alcove, secluded and private, Beth opened her menu to find no prices were listed. She knew she was in trouble then. She had planned on ordering the cheapest item on the menu, but that was hard to figure out.

  “Don’t worry about the cost, Beth.”

  “But I’m on the budget committee and I know how much you make as our minister.”

  “Don’t worry. I wouldn’t have brought you here if I couldn’t afford it. This won’t cost me what it would have cost to hire a tutor for Jane.” He laid his hand over hers on the white linen tablecloth and captured her gaze within his. “Besides, Beth, you deserve the best. You do so much for everyone else that it’s about time someone did something for you.”

  Heat scorched her cheeks. Compliments always made her feel uneasy. She looked away and caught sight of Nick and Jesse sitting across the room from them. Her friend waved, a huge grin on her face. Suspicion began to dawn in Beth’s mind.

  “Did anyone suggest this restaurant to you?”

  Samuel chuckled. “I got some help from one of my parishioners.”

  That would be the last time she confided in Jesse. Beth returned her friend’s greeting with a narrowed gaze. “Jesse Blackburn?”

  “Actually her husband, Nick.”

  “Nick!”

  “I figured a man of his means would know the best place to eat in a fifty-mile radius.”

  “So Jesse didn’t tell you I’ve always dreamed of having dinner at Andre’s?”

  One corner of his mouth hitched in a lopsided grin. “No, but thanks for letting me know my choice was a good one. It isn’t every day a guy can make a lady’s dream come true.”

  The appreciative gleam in his eyes, coupled with his heart-melting smile, sent her heartbeat racing. She dropped her gaze to the elaborate gold-and-cream china, his hand continuing to cover hers. Warmth crackled at the contact.

  “What other dreams do you have, Beth Coleman? I know about traveling and seeing the world, and now this one. But surely you have others.”

  Her lungs expanded as she drew in a deep breath and held it for a few extra seconds. “Actually, I don’t. Of course, I want my brothers and sister to do well.”

  His forehead creased. “Nothing else? No fame, fortune?”

  “I’m a very simple person. I don’t require a lot to be happy.”

  Samuel glanced beyond her right shoulder. “Hold that thought. I think our waiter is waiting for us to order.” He slid his hand back and picked up the menu to study.

  She missed his touch the second it was gone, and that realization surprised her. She had always been sensible, never particularly getting all weak-kneed over any movie star or celebrity everyone else was raving about. Quickly she lifted her me
nu to peruse before she did something foolish like put her hand over his. After narrowing the choices to filet mignon and pork, she went with the roast pork with a crab stuffing, corn creamed mashed potatoes and steamed vegetables.

  After the waiter took their orders, Beth leaned forward and asked, “What is one of your dreams? It’s not fair for you to know two of mine and I don’t know one of yours.”

  “Beth, haven’t you heard life isn’t fair?”

  “Yes, and I won’t accept that answer. Evading my question isn’t an option.”

  He tapped his finger against his chin and looked toward the ceiling as though in deep thought. “Mmm. Let me see. What is a dream I’ve had?”

  “No, what is a dream you have now?”

  His eyes darkened, a somber expression descending. “To keep my family together.”

  She shook her head. “Your family is together.”

  “Not together so much as back to the way it once was before…” His words faded into silence.

  “Before your wife died?”

  He nodded.

  “What happened?”

  He opened his mouth to say something, but clamped it shut and stared off to the side of Beth. When he reestablished eye contact with her, he said, “I wasn’t there for Ruth when she needed me the most. I couldn’t help her. I had to watch her die from breast cancer and I could do nothing to take the pain away.” He swallowed hard. “One of the last things she said to me was that she regretted most not being able to have another child with me. We’d both wanted another and had been trying for months. Then she died and I couldn’t even deal with the three children I had. I was too busy grieving, questioning God for taking her from me.”

  The pain in his voice underscored the depth of the despair he had sunk to after his wife’s death. Tears choked off her words, making it difficult to respond to him.

  He pinned her with his intense gaze. “I haven’t told anyone else this. I don’t even know why I told you. I shouldn’t have.”

  She reached toward him. “I’m glad you did.” She suppressed her own reeling emotions to help him. “We can’t go back, Samuel. You know that. We have to make a new future with what God has given us.”