Taking a deep breath, I tried to force myself back into the books but it was a complete failure. I just didn’t care about cosigns or Shakespeare’s intentions. And the idea of writing a report about the French Revolution and its consequences just seemed silly.
There was a beautiful girl sitting next to me. A girl who said she loved me and who I loved more than life itself. A girl who smelled of spring and happiness with a body that called to me. My insides were all tied up in a knot and the world expected me to concentrate on my homework.
Nope, it just wasn’t going to happen.
Closing my book, I studied her for a moment then gently pulled her book from her.
She frowned at me for a moment until I started asking her questions from the back of the chapter.
Jade gave in and started answering. She was smart I realized. She knew the subject matter and could explain it in detail. I wasn’t surprised. I had always known she was intelligent but after what she had been through over the last few months. To keep up with this stuff was pretty good.
When we were done, I closed the book and slid it back to her. “You’ve got this stuff down cold,” I told her.
She blushed slightly as she looked down at her hands. She wasn’t used to being complimented I realized and swore to myself that I would do more of that. I liked the happiness in her eyes.
“Do you want me to quiz you?” she asked softly.
I could only shake my head.
She frowned for a moment then asked, “Then, what do you want me to do for you?”
I couldn’t stop myself from smiling broadly as a hundred different ideas popped into my head.
She saw my look then blushed full red as she realized what I was thinking.
“Sorry,” I said even though I wasn’t really. I liked making her blush. It was one of those new special things I had discovered about life. There was nothing so pretty in this world as Jade McDonald blushing.
“This isn’t going to work,” I said with a sad sigh.
“What?” she exclaimed as fear jumped to the back of her eyes.
“This, doing homework together,” I said. “I can’t keep my eyes off of you and on the page.”
She relaxed as her cheeks turned red again, but then she looked up with a deep frown. “I’m serious Parker. I won’t be the reason you don’t get what you want.”
I couldn’t stop myself. “I want a lot of things, Jade.”
“Stop that,” she hissed. “I am serious.”
“So am I.” But she was right. If I was going to get the grades, I needed then I was going to have to study alone. This would never work. But the thought of leaving her at that moment tore a hole in my gut.
“Maybe you should go,” she said. “Maybe you need to study at home.”
I sighed heavily and nodded. “Maybe you’re right,” I answered but I knew it was the stupidest idea I ever had.
She sighed also then smiled sadly at me. “We’re new at this. We will figure it out eventually.”
I laughed. There was only one thing that was going to fix this raging need burning inside of me. But it was too soon. And things between us would change too much. She wasn’t ready for that I realized.
Sighing again, I gathered my books and stood to leave. Jade jumped up and held my arm for a moment then reached up and kissed me on the cheek. “I’m sorry,” she said.
“For what?” I asked. “For being too beautiful that a guy can’t even think straight around you?”
She blushed again and I congratulated myself. “Don’t worry,” I told her. “We will figure it out.”
A quick nod let me know that she was okay and wasn’t mad at me.
“Call me tonight,” she said, “Before you go to bed.”
I nodded as I slowly made my way to the front door. Mrs. Thompson shot me a quizzical stare. As if wondering when I had become such an idiot that I walked away from a beautiful girl.
When I stepped out on the porch, I turned back to stare down into Jade’s eyes. We held each other’s stare for a long moment then I leaned down to kiss her goodbye.
“Remember Princess,” I said. “I love you.”
She smiled with happiness and a tinge of regret as she hugged me and said. “I love you more than you will ever know, Parker Benson.”
Somehow, I pulled myself away and made it home. Both Mom and Buck shot me strange looks but I ignored them as I went to my room to finish my homework. I needed to get this stuff done so I could spend the rest of the night talking to Jade on the phone.
.o0o.
Jade
That became our life. A few minutes in the morning. Lunch. An occasional afternoon together.
I got a part-time job at the pet store. Parker continued to work on his grades, ASB, the school newspaper, and a dozen other things he was involved with.
But we had those special moments. A drive-in movie. A picnic in the park on the last day of our Indian summer. Stolen kisses in the hall, and long talks on the phone that dragged into the early morning hours.
My life was too perfect. I kept expecting Parker to wake up one morning and realize what an idiot he had been and break-up with me. But every time we saw each other, it was as if we cemented our relationship even more.
Mrs. Thompson spent Thanksgiving at her daughter’s. I spent it with the Bensons. I took an apple pie that I made from scratch. With Mrs. Thompson oversight of course.
Parker’s Mom greeted me with a big smile and a tight hug. As if she were actually pleased to have me there. The house smelled of turkey and a dozen other spices.
Buck eyed the apple pie then gave me a quick grin. “What did you bring everyone else?” he said as he tried to take the pie from his mom.
She slapped at his hands and pulled the pie back. Then gave me a sweet smile. “Parker is in his room,” she said as if it was perfectly okay for me to go back there and join him.
When I knocked on his door, I couldn’t stop myself from remembering the night I had slept there.
“Hey, Princess,” he said as he opened the door, gave me a quick peck on the cheek then went back to working on his computer.
“What you doing?” I asked as I put my hands on his shoulder to look over him at the screen.
“Scholarship applications,” he said as if it weren’t a big thing. My heart fell. Every day brought us one day closer, I realized. Closer to us ending and him going on with the rest of his life.
As he punched the enter button, he turned around and smiled up at me. I fought to put a smile on my face but inside I was dying a long slow death. Didn’t he realize what this was doing to me?
What? Did he think we were going to stay in some long-distance relationship? Yeah, like those ever worked. Besides he would be surrounded by beautiful and brilliant girls. Most of them with rich fathers. I would lose him forever.
As we looked at each other I could see his mind working. He was going to ask me about applying to colleges, but he stopped himself. It was sort of an unspoken agreement between us not to talk about the future. Instead, he let it go.
“Hungry?” he asked as he ushered me out of his room. “Mom’s been cooking since six this morning and won’t let us in her kitchen. Buck and I were thinking about making a hamburger run. You in?”
“Don’t you dare,” I said to him as I slapped his shoulder. “After all the work your mother has done. How could you be so cruel.”
He frowned at me as if he couldn’t understand why one thing had anything to do with the other.
I could only shake my head at him and leave him there to go offer to help Mrs. Benson.
“You can mash the potatoes,” she said as she used the back of her wrist to wipe a wisp of hair out of her eyes. “I can’t trust those boys. They eat up half the food before it makes it to the table.”
I laughed as I started in on the potatoes. One thing about living with Mrs. Thompson. The kitchen didn’t scare me.
“I cheated, these are from the store, Mrs. Benson said as she arranged
the dinner rolls on the baking sheet. “But the boys will never know the difference.”
She is enjoying this, I realized. Even though she was harried and stressed to the max. Deep down, she was enjoying it.
“I do this every year. Over plan and worry about every detail. And they scarf down the food like it’s pizza.”
“They do appreciate it though,” I said. Just think, years from now, they will be complaining to their wives that it isn’t the way their mother did it so it’s not right.”
She laughed as she slid the rolls into the oven to warm them then froze and looked at me strangely. “Has Parker done that with you?” she asked. “I know you’ve cooked several meals for him. Mrs. Thompson was telling me about your beef stroganoff.”
Suddenly the significance of my words hit me like a freight train. Had I given her the idea that I was planning on being Parker’s wife? That I was going to stop him from going off to college.
“Um, no, nothing like that,” I said.
She frowned for a moment then shook her head. “So, he likes your cooking better than mine.”
I froze as my stomach dropped out from under me until I saw the glimmer in her eye. She was teasing me.
“Oh, honey,” she said as she pulled me into a quick hug. “You are too easy. If you’re going to hang around this family you are going to have to become less gullible.”
All I could do was sigh with happiness. Yes, my future looked miserable. But I had today. Thanksgiving with the Benson Family.
She started taking food out to the table. “Is Jake here yet?” she asked her sons then turned back to me. “He’s leaving next week for New York. He says it’s just for a visit. But I’m afraid this might be the last time he’s here for a while.”
The pain in the back of her eyes told me just how torn up she was.
“No, he’s not here,” Buck said as he took the platter of sweet potatoes from his mom. “I say we don’t wait for him. You know the rules. Food waits for no man. You snooze you lose.”
Mrs. Benson rolled her eyes. “He’ll be here. He promised.”
“More for us if he isn’t,” Parker said as he shot me a quick grin.
“In your dreams,” a deep voice said from the front door. Jake Benson, the black sheep of the family stood there with a wide smile. Parker had filled me in on a dozen stories about his big brother. Part hero worship and part disdain. The two of them couldn’t be more not alike. Except they both had that Benson tendency. Wide shoulders, killer smiles, and solid confidence.
Jake saw me then gave Parker a quick smile. “What she sees in you I will never know.”
“I’ve been telling him that for months,” Buck said as he brought in the salad. He was bringing in most of the food I realized. Then I understood. The sooner the food was on the table, the sooner we could start eating.
“Son,” Mrs. Benson said as she pulled Jake into a deep hug. “You leave Parker alone. Don’t forget, he’s my favorite.”
Jake laughed then looked over his mom’s shoulder to make sure I knew she was kidding.
“Come on let’s eat,” Buck whined. “I’m wasting away to nothing.”
That was how I spent Thanksgiving. Surrounded by a family full of love. I wondered about my mother. And about my father. But neither had seemed to care enough to see how I was doing. So, I dismissed the guilt and worry and concentrated on enjoying what I had.
Of course, deep down. I knew it wouldn’t last. But I would always be able to say that I had experienced one good holiday in my life. And I had shared it with the man I loved.
Chapter Twelve
Parker
Christmas was special. Jake was gone, so Buck and I went out of our way to keep Mom’s spirits up. She would catch us at it, then shake her head.
“It’s not the end of the world,” she said, but I could tell that deep down, it sort of was for her.
When Jade arrived, my heart jumped. She stood at our front door loaded with wrapped presents and a platter of Christmas cookies. Dressed in a forest green dress and a red Santa hat, the girl looked deliciously festive.
“A Christmas Princess,” I said as I leaned down and stole a quick kiss before helping her with her packages.
She blushed prettily as she adjusted her hat. Even after all these months, she still blushed easily. One of the many things I loved about her.
“Mom’s in the kitchen,” I told her as I placed her presents under the tree.
“Is that Jade?” Mom called from the kitchen. “I need your help, honey.”
Jade shot me a smile of pure happiness. She loved it when Mom treated her as if she was one of the family. Every time I thought about it, I got angry at her real mom and dad. How could a person be so cold? Especially with someone as special as Jade. It made no sense.
Somehow, they solved Mom’s emergency and called us into dinner.
I held Jade’s chair. She gave me a beaming smile over her shoulder. A look of adoration that could twist a man’s soul. I’d conquer worlds for this woman just so she would look at me like that again.
When I sat down, Jade reached over under the table and squeezed my hand as her knee rubbed against mine. It was her way of letting me know that she was happy.
“So,” Mom began after we started eating, “when do the college acceptance letters show up.”
“Late March, early April,” I said as I took another bite of ham. Jade’s knee moved away from mine and I caught a hint of fear behind her eyes. We were going to have to deal with this issue, I realized. The future. We couldn’t keep ignoring it.
“I still can’t believe you actually think they are going to take someone like you,” Buck said as he filled his mouth with too much food.
I wanted to change the subject, but I couldn’t ignore it completely or he’d never let it go.
“I’ve checked all the boxes, Grades, SAT, extracurricular activities. One of them should take me.”
Buck scoffed. “What did you get on your SATs.”
When I told them, Jade’s jaw dropped as she turned to me in shock.
“How can you be this smart and not be a nerd,” she said.
Buck laughed. “I think he is at heart.”
“No,” Jade said forcibly. “No way. He’s too handsome, he has more social skills than a coffee table like most nerds, and let’s face it. He is just too sexy to be considered a nerd. A nerd could never have a body like his.
Mom’s fork halted halfway to her mouth. Jade suddenly blushed. Buck laughed. And I could only curse under my breath. The last thing I wanted was my family discussing our love life or lack thereof.
Jade and I hadn’t taken things to their full and final conclusion. Don’t get me wrong. Things could and did get hot and heavy. But I was holding back. I knew that if we did, it would change things. Finalize our future.
But every day it was getting harder and harder. I thought that Jade sort of felt the same way.
“So, April then,” Mom said as if Jade hadn’t mentioned her son’s body.
I gave her a quick smile of thanks for pulling us out of that quagmire. After dinner, Mom said to leave the dishes so we could do presents. Jade sat down next to me on the couch, I put my arm around her and pulled her into a quick hug and pushed aside her Santa hat so I could kiss the top of her head.
“Okay,” Buck said. He had nominated himself for elf for the day and would be passing out packages. “Jade first, because she has to put up with my brother. She deserves to get something out of it.”
He gave her my present. She carefully unwrapped the box.
“Hey, we just usually rip it,” Buck said, “It goes faster that way.”
She looked up at my brother and said, “I am savoring the moment. Besides, if it means you have to wait, then that’s a good thing.”
I laughed as she slowly folded the red and green paper then paused for a long second before opening the small box. I had given her a gold locket and chain. And a small note about how much I loved her. I know, not orig
inal. But it was from the heart.
She stared at it for a long moment then looked at me with misty eyes. “Thank you,” she said as she gave me a deep hug. As I held her, I felt her body begin to shake.
She looked up with tears running down her cheek.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” I asked as I pulled back and wiped at her wet cheek.
She smiled through her tears and said, “It is just so perfect. Everything. All of you. Thank you.”
Mom sniffed as she wiped at her own eyes.
“Hey,” Buck exclaimed. “Jesus, Jade, you are such a girl. It’s Christmas. No tears.”
She laughed and wiped her tears away then nodded for him to continue. Of course, the tears threatened again when she got the present that Mrs. Thompson had slipped to Mom earlier in the week. A wooden recipe box filled with brand new index cards. Each one carefully filled out in Mrs. Thompson’s shaky hand.
Jade stared down at the box in shock. “It must have taken her forever,” she mumbled to herself. “She left the oatmeal raisin cookie recipe out. I guess that she wants me to keep the card she gave me.”
Mom couldn’t stop smiling and I swear, even Buck got misty eyed but he covered it by diving back under the tree for the next present.
When he handed me Jade’s present, I could tell instantly it was a book. But, which one? I wondered.
I was surprised to my socks as I slowly ran my hand over the cover of William Blackstone’s, Commentaries on the Laws of England.
“It’s the start of your law library,” Jade said quickly as if she were worried I wouldn’t like it. “Miss Kelly, the librarian said every lawyer should have a copy. It’s not a first edition of course. I mean it was written in seventeen …”
I leaned down and kissed her. She was babbling because she was nervous and I needed to fix that immediately.
“Thank you,” I said. “It is perfect.”
Mom nodded vigorously. I don’t know if it was because she knew how much it meant to me. Or if it was that she was glad to see that Jade understood my future.
I think that was the moment that serious doubts began to creep in. How could I ever leave this woman? And how could I ask her to wait years and years for me? Come on, this was Jade McDonald, the prettiest girl within a hundred miles.
Hidden Truth (The Benson Brothers Book 2) Page 7
