Relic

by Bronwyn Eley

  Only one thing made Kye so emotional: the idea of losing me.

  Any time mother spoke of me marrying and moving away, Kye would cross his arms and pout until I assured him I would never really leave him. If he was this upset, it meant I was leaving. Which meant –

  Kye sobbed, struggling to break free from my grip. I looked up at my mother, who had pressed the cloth to her nose. She managed the first half of my name before collapsing into a breathless sob.

  Thoughts raced into my head, other possibilities scrambling to be the right one. But there was only one thing that could take me away from Kye and my family. It was something I never truly believed could happen until now.

  Blinking the tears from my eyes, I looked at my brother. ‘Kye,’ I said sternly. He looked up, nose leaking halfway to his chin. I held a hand up to my mother and she pressed the cloth into it. I held it to Kye’s nose and he blew.

  ‘That’s my boy,’ I said softly, wiping away the worst of it. ‘Now, is that any way to greet your sister?’

  ‘I don’t w-w-want you to leave me,’ he sobbed. ‘I don’t want you t-t-to go. Who will walk m-me to school?’

  That was when my throat closed. I could hear a rasping sound escaping it as the panic began to burn deep inside me. I pulled Kye to my chest, his little arms wrapping around my neck. I didn’t want to leave him. I didn’t want to go. I didn’t want anyone else walking him to school in the morning.

  How was this really happening? How was this all I got out of life? How was this it?

  ‘Am I dreaming?’ I directed the question at my mother, panic wobbling my voice. ‘Am I?’

  She shook her head.

  ‘Alright, then,’ I said softly, pulling back from Kye and standing.

  ‘No, Kaylan!’

  ‘Come on.’ I pulled him to my side and moved into the living room. As I expected, Rhey was sitting quietly at the dining table, hands tucked neatly in his lap, head down. The other person at the table wasn’t Elias, but a city guard who, strangely, looked like he was about to be sick. Hand over his mouth, he showed a peculiar interest in the water boiling over onto the fire, slowing putting it out. He hadn’t looked up as I entered and I didn’t blame him.

  ‘As long as you’re here for me,’ I began, directing my full attention to the guard. He slowly peeled his eyes away from the fire and toward my face. ‘Then you and I have no problem.’

  He cleared his throat. ‘If you’re Kaylan Rove, then I’m here for you, yes.’

  I nodded once, then turned back to Kye. ‘Listen to me –’

  ‘No!’ Kye shouted, pushing at me. ‘You can’t leave. You won’t leave me, you promised!’

  ‘I have no choice, Kye.’

  ‘But you do! You can run away! I’ll come with you!’

  I couldn’t do that. We all knew it. Even if I managed, somehow, to get past the city walls, my family would pay the price.

  I looked over at my mother, who still lingered by the entrance, using her singed sleeve to wipe her nose. She moved to me and took Kye, who immediately wrapped himself around her waist. The bench was big enough for three, but I pressed myself as close to Rhey as I dared. I didn’t move to touch him or speak; we all knew better. Kye’s emotion was a force of nature, demanding to be felt, but Rhey had to be coaxed out of the shell he built for himself.

  While I waited, I looked over at the guard. He didn’t seem to be in any rush to get me out the door, and a tiny flare of appreciation warmed my chest. He was about the same age my father was when he died, with a head of thick, curly hair and slanted brows. He was a local; the dark tone of his skin gave him away. His clothes were immaculate.

  He wasn’t what I was expecting. I had heard stories of guards storming into houses unannounced and dragging new Shadows into the streets as they cried for their families to save them. It was almost impossible for me to believe that I might find an ally in a city guard, but if there was even the slightest chance, I would use it.

  ‘What’s your name?’

  He looked down at the table. ‘Niell.’

  ‘Look at me, Niell.’

  He did.

  ‘I can’t leave until my other brother gets back. I have to say goodbye to him before I go.’

  ‘He shouldn’t be long,’ Niell replied. ‘I sent my trainee to fetch him. Your mother said he would likely be at Irey’s Tavern.’

  I glanced at her. She was looking anywhere but at me.

  ‘Was the trainee told what to expect?’

  ‘Yes,’ Niell said quietly. ‘Your mother explained.’

  ‘I guess we wait, then.’

  I never thought anything would be harder than watching my father’s body being lowered into the ground, but I was wrong. This was the longest ten minutes of my life. Mother and Kye sat by the fire, both sobbing quietly. Rhey hadn’t moved an inch. Niell returned his gaze to the fire and I contemplated never seeing my family again after this night.

  It wasn’t always the case. Some Shadows saw their families many times before they finally succumbed to their illnesses.

  Others didn’t.

  The door opened with a violent budge and my brother’s lanky figure stumbled into view. The city guard trainee hurried in a moment later, reaching for Elias to no avail. Elias’ hand lashed out, striking the man away, before he rounded on the rest of us.

  I hadn’t been sure if the guard would tell him why he was being dragged from his favourite tavern too early in the night, but now I knew the answer. Elias had no idea what he was walking into. I took in the dazed look in his eyes, the careless movements of his limbs, the redness of his face. This wasn’t going to be an easy conversation.

  As I rose from my seat, I felt a cold hand brush my arm. Rhey. Swallowing the rock in my throat, I turned to Elias.

  ‘Elias,’ I began. ‘Something’s happened.’

  Whenever he was like this, he always paused before replying. It was as if his brain was trying to process what I’d said and how to respond. That much alcohol slowed the mind.

  I was used to our conversations being slower these days, so I counted the pause.

  One, two, three, four, fi—

  ‘What is going on?’ His words slurred from his mouth.

  ‘Elias, you should sit down.’

  One, two, three, fo—

  ‘No,’ he said slowly, as if that would somehow make it a more reasonable word. ‘I’m fine.’

  ‘You are not fine,’ I hissed, leaning into my words, then stopped. I couldn’t handle him the way I usually would – not tonight. ‘How much have you drunk?’

  There was no pause this time, because he wasn’t going to answer. He never did.

  ‘Elias, these men are here to take me to the castle. I’ve been selected as the new Shadow.’

  As I said the words, it felt like my mind was floating above my body, completely unattached, watching us all in some strange nightmare. Elias looked straight at me – the best he could manage in his current condition, at least.

  ‘I have to go,’ I pressed. ‘I was waiting for you to say goodbye.’

  In a way, it was good that he was in this state. I became a different person when he was like this. Less emotional, more black-and-white. I could tell him what to do and order him about without feeling like I might break. There was no choice; I had to, so it took the emotion out of it. Temporarily, at least.

  Later, I would always crumble.

  Elias pointed at Niell. ‘You can’t take her.’

  He said each word individually, as if stringing a proper sentence together was too much for his brain right now. He must have had a lot tonight.

  ‘Please, Elias.’ I moved toward him and brushed his hair out of his eyes. He looked the most like our mother. The same wavy, dark-brown hair. The same button nose. The same brown eyes. He was slender like her too, with wide shoulders and small hips. I was the only one who took after our father; I was the only one to inherit his blue eyes.

  ‘No, let me talk to him.’ Elias was young and unstable, but
he was strong for a sixteen-year-old. The alcohol made him reckless, and that combination of recklessness and strength made him frightening to handle sometimes. While I was stronger, my heart would always beat hard in my chest whenever he turned aggressive.

  ‘No.’ I stepped in front of him. ‘Talk to me.’

  ‘No!’ He was quicker now. Anger did that to him, no matter what state he was in. ‘You can’t take her!’

  I leaned away from his voice, but pushed against his chest, hoping to stop him. He stepped again and again, countering every move I made. I heard someone rise from the bench. If he was smart, it was Niell putting distance between himself and my brother.

  ‘Elias.’ My mother’s gentle voice felt like cold rain on a hot day, but it didn’t reach my brother. She stood next to me and put a hand on his right shoulder. I followed suit, placing my hand on his left. ‘Please calm down.’

  Sometimes it seemed like she wasn’t even aware of how serious Elias’ condition was. She spoke too calmly and forgot each incident the moment he was safe in his bed. I wasn’t as good at forgiving or forgetting.

  ‘I want to talk to him!’ Elias growled.

  ‘It’s not his fault, Elias!’ I pressed against his shoulder. ‘Leave him alone. He can’t do anything here. It’s not his fault.’

  Then he went silent. His eyes grew wide and his hands curled into fists. He panted like a dog, his face turning a deep red.

  ‘Get. Your. Hands. Off. Me.’

  I let my hand drop. My mother followed suit.

  ‘We can’t do anything to change this, Elias,’ I said calmly, realising it was true. There was nothing to be done now except to follow Niell to the castle. ‘I need you to stay here and be strong for the boys. They need you.’ I paused, dropping my voice. ‘You used to need me, remember?’

  ‘Yeah,’ he replied indignantly, leaning toward me with the word. ‘Of course I remember.’ One slack hand fingered the ring hanging around his neck. The chain was rusted and ready to snap, but the solid iron ring would outlast even Elias’ mishandlings. I had made it, after all. Not for Elias, but for our father, to match the one I gave our mother. Tosh had let me use the forge on my own time to make them. He nearly laughed when he saw my first attempts and soon set my technique straight.

  ‘Will you look after them for me?’ I reached slowly for Elias’ arm.

  He glanced over to where Rhey and Kye sat, now huddled together by the fire. His mouth twisted as he looked at the boys, only nine and ten years old, both already too familiar with the pain of loss.

  ‘I will.’

  ‘Thank you,’ I whispered, brushing his arm. He nodded but said nothing more.

  ‘I guess we should go.’ The words fell from my mouth without me realising what they actually meant. Go. Leave. Move away from life and head toward death. A long walk up the hill to the castle overlooking us all, to the last place I would ever live. To the man I had hoped I would never meet. To suffer unknowable pain until I died.

  ‘I almost forgot,’ I said softly, reaching into my pocket. Pressing the coins to my mother’s palm, I took a step back and straightened. ‘Sal didn’t take much convincing.’

  Then I was out the door.

  Chapter 3

  As we entered the more populated parts of town, I started hearing them.

  The ones who weren’t chosen.

  A sharp intake of breath. ‘The new Shadow.’

  The woman, whoever she was, sounded relieved. Hadn’t I been relieved every time I heard the Shadow had been chosen and it wasn’t anyone I knew?

  ‘That poor girl.’

  They were just words. There was probably some small part of her that actually meant it. But at least it wasn’t her.

  Even with my head down, I saw Niell turn to appraise me from the corner of my eye. His walk was slow and relaxed, unlike his trainee, telling me that he trusted me not to run. It had been a while since someone tried. But I was grateful that neither of them held onto me as we walked. I wasn’t sure I could handle that right now.

  The crowds grew as we neared the castle. The streets of the upper city were generally more pleasant – fewer foul smells, fewer drunks parading. It was rare that I visited this part of the city. Even though Shae lived nearby, she usually came down to see me.

  There were more guards here, watching on rigidly, speaking low among themselves. Their large numbers were insurance against me running, but it was just for show. The only type to run would be someone who had nothing, and no one, left.

  ‘She’s younger than the last one,’ I heard a man murmur. ‘Maybe she’ll last longer than he did.’

  I caught the bitterness in my throat before I unleashed it on him, knowing my tendency to talk back would get me in more trouble in this part of the city – especially in there. I would have to push down my natural instinct to defend myself.

  A gleam of bright red caught my eye. Everyone knew that elegant, alluring style of clothing. I didn’t know the woman personally, but I recognised her beauty. The beauty of a Companion. She stood under a large archway, eyebrows drawn in, mouth slightly agape as if she were going to say something but had decided against it, hand resting delicately on the smooth stone entrance. I wondered if she actually felt bad for me, the stranger walking by.

  I scanned the Companion building, hoping to spot Shae’s friendly face. When I finally found her, I had to crane my neck to get a good view. She was sitting on one of the many balconies, surrounded by candlelight and friends. I envied her chance to enjoy the balmy evening air in peace. How differently our nights had turned out.

  She was right. I shouldn’t have gone home.

  The Companions were all leaning over the balcony’s edge now. What a sight this was. My eyes locked with Shae’s, and she crumpled forward on the rail. Gentle hands reached to steady her, hands that weren’t mine. I held up a hand to her, close to my body to steady the shaking, but all she did was stare in response.

  ‘This way.’ Niell kept his words soft. Just before we took the turn, I glanced back at Shae. Now curled over in a hunch, head tucked to her knees, a woman bracing either side of her. My throat tightened as the image of my friend was lost behind a building.

  Up and up I went, acutely aware that the castle was looming larger with every step. The last stretch of road was the hardest. The buildings fell away and a path of green guided us right to the front gate.

  There were guards either side of the gate, alert and stone-faced. But it was the man standing in the centre that drew my attention. While Niell sported the usual all-black uniform, the man before us was dressed in dark blue, with gold buttons and three stripes of red sewn onto the right side of his chest. The Ediann crest was sewn over the left breast, the same as all the other guards.

  Blue and red meant captain, if I remembered correctly.

  He had the look of a man who had been well-fed his entire life, but I didn’t doubt the strength behind his build. His thinning grey hair reflected his advancing years. His legs were shoulder-width apart; hands resting on his lavish belt buckle, head slightly back as he watched my approach.

  A show of power, if ever I saw one.

  Behind the captain, the looming gates were at least four times his height, attached to thick stone walls that wrapped themselves around the castle like a cold embrace. When I first started working at the smithy, Tosh had taken me on an excursion to see these gates. This, he had said, was the kind of project a Blacksmith could be proud of.

  ‘I’ll handle this,’ the captain growled. ‘Go back to your post.’

  Niell nodded and hurried off. The trainee left too, neither of them allowing a second glance in my direction. Ignoring the sinking feeling that I was now less safe than I had been a moment before, I turned my gaze to my new escort.

  He took hold of my upper arm, his grip strong. Without a word, he swung us around and gestured to one of the silent guards with his free hand. My arm burned as he twisted and pulled, but I said nothing. A small section of the gate was unlocked and swu
ng open. We passed through an opening just big enough for two.

  Once through the outer gate, we crossed a narrow wooden bridge. I expected it to shudder under our weight as we passed onto it, as the bridges did in the Lower Quarter, but it didn’t buckle.

  My stomach fell away at the sight of the drop below. There were spikes in the dry moat – not just small wooden spikes, but tree trunks sharpened into points and bolted into the ground. One of those would be enough to impale a person.

  I looked ahead to our destination, a gritty iron gate with two more guards. This gate was only lowered in an emergency. This gate was open. Never in my life had I heard of it being dropped – something to be grateful for, I supposed. I took in the spiked points suspended above us, imagining them piercing me to the stone ground below. Stopping what was about to happen.

  We moved into a dark tunnel, where more thick wooden spikes jutted out of the walls on either side, before emerging into a square courtyard. All that occupied the area was an intricately decorated well, dead-centre, demanding all our attention. Its size alone would have done so, the way it was raised in the air with ringed steps fanning out around it. Yet the patterns on the well’s stonework were hypnotising. Dozens and dozens of eagles were engraved into the stone, keeping watchful eyes on us as we passed.

  The guard dragged me up the stairs to a set of oak doors. They were well-crafted, hiding their strength behind beautiful patterns of swirling iron across dark wood, as lovely as the trees. And just as sturdy.

  The large doors groaned as they were opened from the inside. A thin guard came forward to greet his superior, who just nodded in return.

  ‘Captain Thorn.’ The guard stepped aside to let us pass.

  How appropriate.

  Thorn’s nails dug into my arm, probably drawing blood. The halls were cold, despite the torches hanging off the walls every few metres. I could just see the high ceiling, flashing in and out of darkness as the fire flickered with the passing air.

  Thorn guided us too fast. Dizziness set in as we moved around the spirals of a sickening stairwell and I was grateful when we emerged into a large hallway. My eyes were drawn to the grand timber doors ahead, intricate with swirling patterns. Two guards watched me closely from either side of the doors.