Beyond Reckless

by Autumn Jones Lake

  I snort out a laugh. “That’s probably inevitable.”

  “Do you still blame yourself for Mariella’s death?” she asks quietly.

  “Don’t. I can’t go there.”

  “I know you, Marcel. You think I’m still a kid, but you can always talk to me too.”

  Unlikely. I’m about to brush off her offer, but instead I ask, “You really think Charlotte and I make sense?”

  “More sense than any bunny you’ve ever been with.”

  I shake my head, realizing I’m embarrassed to have this talk with my little sister. “It’s not the same.”

  “Duh. She’s not afraid to tell you to fuck off. That’s what you’ve been missing.”

  After all the tension I caused this morning, her observation makes me laugh until my gut aches.

  “She’s not impressed by this.” Heidi pokes her finger into my cut. “She likes what’s underneath.”

  I raise an eyebrow and she shoves me away. “That’s not the way I meant it.”

  “I know what you meant, Heidi.”

  “Everything okay?” Murphy calls out as he walks toward us. He stops next to Heidi, setting his hand on her shoulder. She leans into him and for the first time, I appreciate how good they are for each other instead of thinking about myself.

  She stares up at him with the adoring look she’s always reserved for Murphy, but she’s right, it’s different now. They’re together. In sync with each other. A couple.

  They’re bonded together by time and friendship.

  And other stuff I don’t want to think about.

  An apology burns in the back of my throat, but I owe it to him. “I’m sorry, Blake.”

  “You don’t need to apologize to me, brother.” He tilts his head toward Heidi, making it clear what he expects.

  “Already done.”

  The fucker actually looks to Heidi to confirm and it makes me laugh. “I see how it’s gonna be. Two against one now, huh?”

  Heidi pushes my shoulder, then nods toward the front door.

  I turn and find Charlotte coming down the stairs toward us. “Can I join you?” she calls out before walking closer.

  “Yeah,” Murphy waves her over. “Come here.” He holds out his fist and she taps her knuckles against his. “Ginger power.” They both crack up and I groan. God only knows what they talked about while they were alone.

  Standing, I wrap my arm around Charlotte’s waist and tug her against me. “Nope. Two against one is bad enough. I’m not having three against me.”

  Charlotte tips her head back, smiling up at me. Pure sunshine. “I’m always team Teller.”

  “Even when I’m a jerk?”

  “Definitely. That’s when you need me most.”

  Heidi taps her foot against my leg and mouths, “Ride or die.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  The guys are called into church a few hours later, leaving me alone with Hope and Trinity.

  Part of me wishes I’d gone with Heidi when she left the clubhouse.

  “Is it usually Saturday morning?” I ask Hope more out of nerves than actual interest in when the club sits down to discuss business.

  Trinity sort of frowns at my question and I realize my mistake.

  “I just meant, the last couple Saturdays he’s had to leave, but it works out because that’s when I do brunch with my bestie.” Jesus, someone duct tape my mouth shut.

  While Hope’s been friendly and welcoming, Trinity’s harder. Since she’s Wrath’s wife, that doesn’t surprise me. I should probably be relieved she hasn’t hung me up by my toes and tried to pry information out of me with a nail file. She and Hope are clearly besties. Maybe Hope’s acceptance of me will influence Trinity’s opinion, which will influence her husband’s.

  Hey, a girl can dream.

  “Have you been to physical therapy with him yet?” Trinity asks.

  “No. I think he goes during the week when I’m working.”

  She chuckles. “He probably doesn’t want Violet roping you in to keeping track of his exercises.”

  The familiar way she talks about such a mundane aspect of Teller’s life hits me in an awkward way. Teller’s whole “don’t pull at this thread” comment returns with startling clarity.

  “You seem to know an awful lot about it.”

  Trinity narrows her eyes at my tone. “We all spent a lot of time there when he was re-learning how to walk.”

  “Your husband didn’t mind?”

  Trinity turns her head, giving Hope a who is this bitch? look.

  “Charlotte,” Hope warns, but I’m too stubborn to stop and listen.

  Trinity places a hand on her hip. “You have something you want to say to me, Charlotte?”

  Hope places her hand on Trinity’s arm. “Trin, maybe we should—”

  Focusing on Trinity and ignoring Hope, I ask, “Were you involved with Teller?”

  “Involved?” Trinity’s bitter laugh frazzles my last thread of common sense. “Aren’t you precious.”

  “Did you fuck him?” I ask in a low voice. “Is that better?”

  Her nostrils flare and her non-answer is all the answer I need.

  “How the fuck does that even work?” I snarl. “How do you fuck one brother and marry another one?”

  Trinity steps closer, making me wish I’d listened to Hope’s warning. “Who the fuck do you think you are questioning me? I’ve been here ten years. You’ve been here, what, ten minutes? And you think you have the right to throw attitude at me over something you know nothing about?”

  “I—”

  “I’m married. I don’t know what Teller was thinking sharing that with you, but it’s way the fuck in the past.”

  “It better be.” Wow. I really wish I hadn’t said that.

  Trinity takes another step closer. Her voice drops into a deadlier tone that honestly scares me a little. “You remember the Vipers?”

  I nod, remembering Teller’s story.

  “That’s the kind of club I grew up around. What do you think my childhood was like, princess? Maybe you should set aside all the stories your mommy told you about club girls and think before you open your mouth.”

  My throat works, but no words come out. I’d had a small taste of that treatment from my own club and it wrecked me. If Trinity went through years of that…

  When I don’t respond, she storms down the hall. I turn to Hope, looking for someone to explain myself to, but she shakes her head.

  “That was uncalled for, Charlotte.”

  Hope’s someone I admire a lot. Somehow she makes the attorney/outlaw lifestyle work.

  Her disapproval shames the hell out of me.

  It’s not unusual to find Trinity waiting outside the war room after church.

  What is unusual is to find her without Hope, pissed off, and apparently waiting for me, not Wrath.

  My heart doesn’t give the familiar painful kick it used to at the sight of her. I’m too busy wondering where Charlotte is and if she kept herself out of trouble.

  By the look on Trinity’s face, I have a feeling the answer is no, Charlotte did not keep herself out of trouble.

  “You need to get ahold of your woman, Teller.” She’s not quite shouting, but she’s loud and her cheeks are pink with anger.

  “What—”

  She leans in closer and lowers her voice. “What the fuck were you thinking sharing ancient fucking history with her?”

  “I didn’t.” Although I might as well have.

  “What’s going on?” Wrath asks from behind me. Great. Perfect.

  What the fuck did Charlotte do?

  Wrath sidesteps me and wraps an arm around Trinity. “What’s wrong?”

  “What’s wrong is,” Trinity says without taking her eyes off me. “Teller’s girl needs to learn some respect. If she ever comes at me again the way she just did, I will kick the ever-loving shit out of her. You feeling me, Teller?”

  “What the fuck happened?” Wrath demands.

  “Tr
in–” I start, but Wrath snarls at me and I snap my mouth shut.

  Rock, Z, and Murphy emerge from the war room. “What’s the matter?” Rock asks.

  Trinity’s cheeks turn even redder and I swear her eyes fill with tears, which upsets me more than maybe it should. Trinity’s not a crier. Maybe I’m not in love with her anymore, but I sure as fuck don’t want to be responsible for her tears.

  Without answering, she spins around and storms out of the clubhouse, slamming the door behind her.

  Wrath steps into my space. “Whatever the fuck happened, you better fix it so it doesn’t happen again. No one disrespects my wife and they sure as fuck don’t do it in my clubhouse, brother.”

  “I got it.”

  “Handle your girl,” he warns before taking off after Trinity.

  Murphy’s hand settles on my shoulder, squeezing gently. He doesn’t say anything, just quietly offers support. Fuck me. Wrath’s already not cool with Charlotte being here. This doesn’t help her cause.

  Z shoots a glare at me. “You swore she’d behave herself.”

  Right, I took responsibility for Charlotte, so I definitely have some sort of punishment coming my way.

  Hope joins us in the living room “What the hell happened?” Rock asks.

  Her gaze lands on me and she shakes her head. “Charlotte…said some things she didn’t mean to Trinity.” A very diplomatic answer from our president’s wife. I appreciate her not painting Charlotte as a complete villain.

  I still feel like a jerk though.

  Why didn’t I man up and answer her honestly? Instead, I left Charlotte conflicted and turned her loose. Burying the past seemed like the best approach. But it backfired and I ended up hurting people I care about.

  Again.

  “Where’s Trin?” Hope asks.

  Z points at the door. “She left with Wrath.”

  She and Rock huddle together, speaking in low tones, so I turn to Murphy. “What the fuck? Are all women crazy?”

  “Yes,” he answers with a straight face. “That’s why we love ’em.” He drops his voice a little lower. “But, brother, Trinity doesn’t deserve that shit. Neither does Wrath.”

  “Yeah, I know,” I growl.

  “You better fix it.”

  “Where is she, Hope?” I ask, interrupting her conversation with Rock. He glares at me and I wager I’m about five seconds away from having a size thirteen boot on my neck.

  “She’s still in the dining room,” Hope answers. No judgment in her tone. At least someone isn’t pissed with me.

  As I pass her, she reaches out and squeezes my arm.

  Charlotte’s misery surrounds her when I find her huddled up at one of the dining room tables.

  She lifts her gaze. “I fucked up,” she says almost immediately.

  I pull out the chair next to her and drop into it. “That’s one way to put it. What the fuck happened?”

  She sits back. “I don’t know. I couldn’t stop thinking about how evasive you were. Then this morning with your sister…”

  “I should’ve been honest. I’m sorry. I thought it was better to bury it for everyone’s sake. It really is ancient history.”

  “She mentioned how she’s been to physical therapy with you and it sounded so familiar. I snapped.”

  “You wanna go to PT with me that bad?” I tease.

  She’s not in a joking mood. “You obviously had real feelings for her.”

  “A long, long time ago. I was a dumb-ass kid though. Too stupid to do anything about it.”

  Her mouth turns down. “Do you wish you had?”

  “No. Not anymore. She’s where she should be. We weren’t right for each other.”

  She shakes her head. “Club girls don’t usually become ol’ ladies.”

  “That’s not your business.”

  She stares at me for a few seconds before sitting up straight. “You’re right. I’m always bitching about misogyny in the legal profession. For fuck’s sake, I wrote my college thesis on slut-shaming in the media. And I behaved in a way I’ve always despised.” She drops her head, staring at her hands in her lap, hair covering her face. “I’m sorry.”

  That was a lot of information to take in and part of me wonders what the fuck I’m even doing with a woman like Charlotte. “It’s not me you need to apologize to.”

  She picks her head up, staring me straight in the eye. “Yes I do. I probably made things hella awkward between you and one of your brothers.”

  “Well—” Wrath’s probably busy warming up his fists for my face.

  “Where’d she go? I’ll apologize right now.”

  Now this is not what I expected. I figured she’d dig her heels in. Maybe trash talk Trinity. Try to make me feel even shittier while she was at it.

  I figured we were over.

  That’s not Charlotte’s style. She fucked up and she’s owning it. Already trying to make it right.

  There’s not a lot of room for fuck-ups in our world. But there’s absolutely no room for people who don’t own up to their mistakes.

  Slapping her palm on the table, Charlotte stands. “Is she out there?” she asks, gesturing toward the living room.

  “No. I think she and Wrath headed home.”

  “Will you walk me over to their house?” She gives me a sheepish smile that’s sweet as hell. “Trinity seems like the type of chick who might shoot me on sight.”

  Her eagerness to get this done right now…well, once again I’m impressed with Charlotte.

  “Yeah, come on.” I take her hand and lead her out through the kitchen to the side door. I’d rather avoid anyone who’s still lingering in the living room. She doesn’t question me.

  Once we’re on the path out to Wrath’s house, she opens up. “Trinity said she grew up in a club like the Vipers.”

  “I don’t know anything about that.”

  “How is that possible?”

  “I told you, I was a dumb kid.” Too selfish to ask questions.

  Wrath’s outside when we walk up to the house. He shoots a glare at Charlotte before speaking to me. “Why you here, welterweight?”

  Welterweight. Better than fuckhead. So he’s probably not going to kill me.

  Charlotte drops my hand and takes a few steps forward, which considering the arctic expression Wrath’s wearing, is pretty damn brave. “I came to apologize to Trinity.”

  He cocks his head. “Tell me something. You go after my wife because I gave you a hard time last night?”

  Charlotte blinks, like that never occurred to her. Her body leans into me the smallest amount. “No,” she finally answers.

  Wrath watches her for a few minutes. His gaze slides my way and back to Charlotte before he finally nods.

  Their front door opens and Trinity stands on the porch, arms over her chest. She takes the steps slowly and moves to Wrath’s side where he places his arm around her shoulders.

  “What?” she asks Charlotte.

  My girl isn’t prepared to do this in front of both of us. Wrath seems to sense that and leans over to kiss Trinity’s temple before turning my way.

  “Come here. Let’s find some firewood for you to chop.”

  And here comes my punishment.

  Trinity and I watch as Wrath leads Teller away from us with a hand at the back of his neck.

  “Is that his punishment?” I ask.

  Slowly, Trinity turns and faces me. “What?”

  “Chopping wood.”

  She snorts and finally grins. “Probably.” The smile slides off her face. “Why are you here, Charlotte?”

  “To apologize. I never should have—”

  She jerks her head toward the steps and I follow her over. From our spot, sitting at the top of the stairs, we can see Wrath and Teller at the wood pile.

  “Wyatt’s everything to me,” she says softly. “And we wasted a lot of years that we could have been together, doing stupid shit to hurt each other.” She turns her big, amber eyes my way and they’re filled with pa
in. Pain, I contributed to with my thoughtless words and I feel even worse. “You bringing that up this morning, reminded me of things I’d really rather forget.”

  Another ‘I’m sorry’ seems inadequate, but it’s fine because Trinity isn’t finished.

  “Besides, I’m sure it’s not a real comfortable topic for Teller either.”

  Those words trigger an avalanche of questions.

  “Did you love him?”

  Her eyes turn hard. “Christ, you’re a persistent bitch. No. I care about him. I consider him a friend. But that’s it.”

  Unrequited love. Does that make her his one that got away?

  “He didn’t love me either,” she adds.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes. I was an older woman who—”

  “Who’s,” I wave my hand in front of her, “fucking perfect.”

  “I’m not perfect,” she answers in a low voice. “Not even close. And back then I was a mess.” She shifts, tucking her leg under her like she’s settling in for a long conversation. “I think for a relationship to work you need three things.”

  I wait for her to list them.

  “Loyalty. Respect. Communication. And you need to have all three at the same time.” She stops and stares at me to make sure I’m following along. “I’d die for this club. For Wyatt, I’d do anything. No question. They’ve had my loyalty since day one.” She forces a bittersweet smile.

  “The club or Wrath?”

  She thinks on that for a second or two. “Same thing, Charlotte. The club comes with the man.”

  “Wrath said something similar.”

  “I’m not surprised.” She stops and takes a few breaths. “The things we did to each other were pretty disrespectful and shitty for a while. Teller’s kind of a casualty there, because he didn’t know about Wyatt and me and I feel bad about that. Which brings us to communication. Wyatt and I fucked up all over the place on that one.”

  Her gaze strays back to Wrath and I follow her line of sight, watching her husband chop wood. Shirtless.

  “My God, how can you get anything done around here?”

  She glances at me a slight frown wrinkling her brow until she realizes I’m joking. “It’s not easy.”