Mudpoo and the Fungus Mystery

by Peter Klein

“All in good time,” Fungus McPhee muttered spitting hard into the coals of the campfire so that the flames hissed and spat back at him.

  The pirates had all of their eyes glued on Fungus McPhee. Mudpoo and Harry held their breath; Fungus McPhee looked frightening. They watched silently, carefully peeping through the long grass; unnoticed by the horrible crew.

  “Your job is simple,” Fungus went on, “all you need to do is deliver my parcels and make certain they arrive at their destination, safe and sound. Only one, or two of you will need to carry my parcel, it’s that simple and . . . I’ll pay you well!”

  “Wait . . . ,” asked Bones, “all we’re doing is delivering your gold to somewhere, that’s it, that’s all?”

  “Yesss . . . ,” hissed Fungus McPhee, “you’ve got that right.”

  “Ah that’s a piece of cake,” snivelled Snot, “show us the gold now and we’ll be off, it’ll get to wherever safe and sound,” he said winking and nudging Pong.

  “Hmmm,” replied Fungus McPhee, “I’m sure you will,” he raised one eyebrow which made him look even more fierce.

  “Where are we delivering the parcel to?” asked Grot, who asked the cleverest question.

  “I’m glad you asked,” replied Fungus McPhee, spitting violently at the ground, “AMERICA!”

  “AMERICA!” repeated the pirates, dumbfounded.

  “Why don’t you sell the gold in Australia and save the trip?” spluttered Grot who was the only pirate asking decent questions.

  “Perhaps you’d like to see my gold?” taunted Fungus McPhee, as he walked towards the door of the gold mine with a large rusty key in his hand.

  All of the pirates sat frozen, their eyes transfixed on him.

  FUNGUS McPHEE was about to reveal his AWFUL SECRET to the waiting pirates!

  Everyone held their breath as Fungus McPhee carefully opened the lock The gate creaked and groaned as it opened. He dragged out a large old, hessian sack tied with baling twine and gently placed it on the ground.

  “GOLD,” whispered the pirates loudly, “we’ll all be rich.” Their eyes were transfixed on the bag.

  “Hey, I thought it . . . it . . . MOVED!” murmured Grot.

  “Don’t be stupid, gold can’t move,” argued Bones, “you are such an idiot,” he sneered.

  The pirates studied the large bag.

  Suddenly the bag moved, this time everyone saw it. “YIKE, CRIKEY, WHAT, HAH?” yelled the pirates together.

  “My gold can move,” said Fungus McPhee. He was really enjoying the reaction he was getting from the pirates. Mudpoo and Harry, hidden in the long grass, held their breath. What was in the bag?

  “My gold,” explained Fungus McPhee, “is plundering wildlife. I capture birds and reptiles in Australia and send them to America. I’ve got bags and cages full of critters that I’m sending to people who pay me a small fortune. Your job is to deliver them safely for me.”

  He loosened the rope around the bag. All the pirates stood frozen holding their breath waiting to see what was inside, when suddenly, WHOOSH, an angry wedge-tailed eagle swooped down from nowhere and attacked Fungus McPhee.

  Fungus McPhee swung his arms around wildly, “GET AWAY YOU OVER GROWN BUZZARD, GET AWAY, ARRRGH!!!” he cried.

  In the KERFUFFLE that followed, Fungus McPhee knocked over the bag and three large snakes appeared.

  “ARRRGGGGHHHHH!” screamed the pirates who were all terrified of snakes. “RUNNNNNN,” they yelled, as they took off in all directions.

  “HEAD FOR THE TRUCK!” screamed Bones as the pirates ran about in circles.

  “Settle down,” spat Fungus McPhee, “they’re only inland carpet pythons. They can’t hurt you and they’re worth a fortune on the black market.”

  Just at that moment the boobook owls joined in, swooping and chasing the pirates. Mudpoo and Harry leapt out of their hidey spot and ran towards Fungus McPhee.

  “HEY, WHO ARE YOU . . . ?” screamed Fungus McPhee in stunned surprise, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING . . . ?” he tried to say as Mudpoo rushed to rescue the animals.

  “Got you . . . OW!” screamed Fungus McPhee. Just as he almost grabbed Mudpoo by the arm, Harry got hold of his leg and unbalanced him. he wedge-tailed eagle swooped in for another attack and two little eagles joined in the fray.

  “ARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!” screamed Fungus McPhee and in desperation he threw himself behind the steel door of the goldmine to protect himself from the vicious, attacking eagles. Mudpoo quickly slammed the lock shut and pulled out the key.

  Grot had managed to start the truck and was driving dangerously close to the edge of the hill. Bones, Snot and Pong leapt in, with cuts and bruises, scrapes and confusion. The pirates’ truck spluttered and gurgled off down the hill never to be seen in Bethanga again.

  (Someone later heard they were so traumatised that they left Australia to live on an island somewhere, but no one can be certain about that.)

  Fungus McPhee was trapped. “Let me out of here you rotten lousy kid,” he screamed. But he quickly went quiet and pale when the wedge-tailed eagle returned to guard the door of the mine. Sammy the silver gull flew down, (he could speak eagle and whale and lots of other things, all because of the Magic Tree Stump, but that’s another story). Sammy had found the wedge-tailed eagle and explained the whole story about what the pirates and Fungus McPhee had planned to do.

  “The eagles want to thank you Mudpoo and Harry,” said Sammy. He went on, “If those pirates had managed to poison the rabbits, the toxic poison would’ve harmed the wedge-tailed eagle’s family, as well as the little eagles. They all eat the rabbits you see.”

  The wedge-tailed eagle and the two little eagles nodded politely at Mudpoo and Harry. They were very proud that they had managed to help CAPTURE Fungus McPhee and scare the horrible pirates away.

  “We’d better get a policeman,” smiled Mudpoo.

  With the eagles and Sammy guarding Fungus McPhee, Mudpoo and Harry ran hurriedly into town to get help.

  Pat the Policeman gave Mudpoo and Harry a puzzled look when they arrived at the station. They were gasping for breath and trying to explain everything at once.

  “Hey, slow down, say that again. You’ve captured who . . . at the where . . . with the help of what?” asked the surprised policeman.

  “Fungus McPhee the poacher, at the old Bethanga gold mine, with the help of Sammy silver gull, boobook owls and eagles!” said Mudpoo and Harry together.

  “Hmmm, well I’d better go and take a look,” replied the befuddled policeman.

  The angry old wedge-tailed eagle, guarding Fungus McPhee, was trying to take a chunk out of his nose each time he moved too close to the bars on the gate. They were both screeching at each other (Fungus McPhee was screeching in fear) when the policeman, Mudpoo and Harry arrived in the four-wheel drive police car.

  “I’ll be blowed, Fungus McPhee, the most wanted poacher in Australia! So it is true,” he said scratching his head.

  “Take me in, don’t let that crazy eagle near me,” wailed Fungus McPhee.

  The policeman arrested and handcuffed Fungus McPhee, “Your poaching days are over.”

  “I don’t care, just don’t let any eagles go near me, or that kid and his crazy dog,” moaned Fungus McPhee, as he was led into the police car.

  Pat the policeman looked around and noticed more than a dozen cages that still contained animals. “I’d better see what we can do, there are a lot of distressed animals here.”

  He urgently phoned the officer in charge of wildlife management at the ‘Department of Sustainability and Environment’. “We’ve got a few poached animals here including inland carpet pythons, lizards and birds,” he reported, “we need your best person to come out here at once!”

  “We’ll send you Dr Damian; he’s a research officer in Ecology from an important university who’s written a book about identifying Australian reptiles. He’s tracking inland carpet pythons nearby, so he can be there quickly,” the Wildlife Officer replied.

  Dr Damian ar
rived almost at once in his old four-wheel drive ute. After shaking hands with Mudpoo, Harry and Pat the policeman, he wasted no time getting straight to work to check the captured animals.

  Psssssssst . . . you can find out more about Dr Damian when you visit www.mudpoo.com.au

  First he counted all the animals and then he made a list, writing down their scientific names, which made them sound very important:

  Dr Damian checked them all over very carefully, looking for injuries. He then photographed each one.

  “I’ve found a lot of notes in Fungus McPhee’s diary stating exactly where and when he found them all,” explained the policeman, who handed it to Dr Damian.

  “We need to return them to their correct locations at once,” said Dr Damian. “Fortunately they’re all in good health, but it might have been worse if they were transported to America. I don’t think too many would’ve survived such a long trip!”

  He carefully placed each animal in its own special cage, ready for transport back to its original home.

  “I’m not sure how we’re going to find all of these places on the list: Lake Road; Springdale Road; Sirls Road; Kurrajong Gap Road; Flagstaff Road and Martins Road. It’ll take me a week to do this,” frowned Dr Damian, scratching his chin.

  “Hmmm, why don’t we ask Laurie, the lady who runs the Bethanga Post Office to help us? She knows where all these places are, maybe she’ll even let us borrow her mail van?” suggested Mudpoo helpfully.

  “Great idea, let’s ask her,” he replied enthusiastically, as he picked up his mobile phone.

  Laurie the postie was more than happy to help. “Anything I can do to help the poor little things would be a pleasure. I’ll be up there to get you in a jiffy,” she replied.

  Mudpoo, Harry and Dr Damian looked quite funny sitting in the back of the mail van with boxes of surprised lizards, birds and snakes in the back with them. At each stop the correct animal was released at the exact spot Fungus McPhee had noted finding it in his diary.

  “Here we are, the last one; one tree goanna on Lake Road,” announced Mudpoo.

  The goanna looked very grateful as she was released. She scurried over an embankment and up a tree, as quickly as she could go.

  “There, that’s all of them released back into the wild, thanks for your help Mudpoo and Harry. Maybe there’ll be a reward for you?” suggested Dr Damian.

  “Seeing the animals go back to their homes is reward enough,” smiled Mudpoo, “and we couldn’t have done it without all of our animal friends, especially Hooty and Sammy!”

  Laurie the postie took Dr Damian back to his ute, where he happily waved goodbye to everyone as he drove away. She then drove Mudpoo and Harry back to Captain Pete’s house where Sammy the silver gull and Hooty the boobook owl were waiting.

  “Sizzling sausages, what an adventure!” sighed Sammy the silver gull.

  “Thank you for all you’ve both done,” said Mudpoo kindly. “Sammy you are a wonderfully clever bird, being able to speak so many animal languages.”

  “Oh not really,” replied Sammy, “everyone who has made a wish on the Magic Tree Stump can do it, you’ve just got to trust and believe that you can,” he smiled.

  (Mudpoo once made a wish on the Magic Tree Stump, but that’s another story.)

  “Hooty, you are a very brave little owl,” smiled Mudpoo. Hooty’s eyes sparkled shyly.

  “Oh,” remembered Harry out loud, “we still haven’t solved our rabbit problem.”

  Captain Pete had decided that Mudpoo and Harry must have gone for a long walk and was sitting in Gus, looking very relaxed, reading the Sunday paper. There was nothing unusual about this, except Captain Pete had taken off his boots and there was a smelly odour coming from them.

  “Look . . . ,” Mudpoo shouted, “YOUR BOOTS . . . !”

  “Yes, hello,” replied Captain Pete happily, “I’m enjoying the sun on my toes.”

  “No, LOOK near your boots!”, cried Mudpoo and Harry together.

  There on the ground next to Captain Pete’s boots were two rabbits gagging and gasping for air.

  “The smell is making them sick,” laughed Mudpoo.

  “That smell is not from me, it is from a mysterious fungus called, ‘Epidermophyton’ and it lives in many old boots,” said Captain Pete indignantly.

  “You’ve solved the mystery of how to get rid of rabbits,” cried Mudpoo.

  “What?” asked Captain Pete quite confused, “my FUNGUS solved a MYSTERY?”

  “Your smelly boots can scare rabbits away!” yelled Mudpoo joyfully.

  “You’ll be a hero,” said Harry, remembering what the farmer had said.

  “Oh,” said Captain Pete, “that’s good!”

  “No that’s wonderful,” Mudpoo replied and he ran down to the house with a new clever idea.

  Down by the back door there was a box of Captain Pete’s old boots and shoes and there were even more in the box by the laundry. Some boots had been in the box for years.

  “Help me put these into a wheelbarrow and we’ll tie one to every mailbox we can find,” cried Mudpoo excitedly to Harry.

  Captain Pete helped Mudpoo and Harry walk up the road to hang the old boots and shoes on roadside posts and mail boxes. ‘They don’t smell that bad,’ he thought, as he cautiously sniffed an old boot.

  “Look!” cried Harry, “The rabbits are leaving!”

  Captain Pete looked on in amazement.

  Sure enough there were dozens of rabbits heading for the hills, trying to get away from the smelly old boots and shoes.

  Mudpoo and Harry were so busy hanging old boots, they hadn’t been able to tell Captain Pete the whole exciting story about the capture of Fungus McPhee.

  “We’ve solved two fungus mysteries today,” said a tired Mudpoo.

  “Put the wheelbarrow in the shed, while I make us all a relaxing cup of billy tea with fresh yummy damper; then you can tell me everything,” replied a smiling Captain Pete.

  A rather large rabbit appeared in the shed when Mudpoo and Harry were packing up. He startled Mudpoo as he began to speak.

  “G’day, I’m a direct descendant of the original European rabbits released in Victoria in 1859. James is my name,” and he shook hands with Mudpoo.

  “Pleased to meet you James,” smiled Mudpoo, too tired to realise he was now actually having a conversation with a rabbit.

  “On behalf of all the rabbits around here I’d like to thank you for destroying the pirates’ toxic carrot baits; poison is a horrible way to die you know.”

  Mudpoo nodded, he felt sure that was true.

  “Because you helped us, we’re leaving Bethanga . . . to live on the other side of the hill,” and added . . . “your smelly boots and shoes are really too much!” He winked and wiggled and with a grin, James the rabbit bounced away.

  “Did you hear that Harry? The rabbits are leaving town, Captain Pete will be a hero!” exclaimed Mudpoo. “Harry? Harry? Harry . . . ?” But Harry was too exhausted to stay awake and had curled up, fast asleep on one of Captain Pete’s old boots.

  Mudpoo thought to himself, ‘another great adventure with a successful outcome and we didn’t even have to leave home. I wonder if the rabbits will come back one day.’

  Mudpoo suspected they probably would, but at least for now they had discovered a temporary, environmentally friendly solution, and they’d solved the mystery of the Old Bethanga ‘Gold’ Mine. Happily he carried the sleeping Harry down to the house where, in the kitchen, the delicious smell of billy tea and damper was too good to resist. Just outside the window, Hooty the boobook owl was doing his happy little ‘mo-poke, mo-poke’ call.

  “Ah there you are. I’ve just poured the tea, now tell me the whole story,” smiled a bright eyed Captain Pete . . .

  (Hear's some important information for you. You'll find more on the website....)

  BETHANGA – Is a beautiful, retired old gold and copper mining town situated near Lake Hume in North-Eastern Victoria, Australia. It’s just a 25 mi
nute drive from the twin cities of Albury-Wodonga. It is surrounded by rolling hills and boasts an amazing lookout that has picturesque views of the famous Bethanga Bridge and the surrounding district. Things you’ll find in Bethanga include: a hall, a general store, a friendly pub, a post office, a cricket ground, a school, a police station, a golf course and breathtaking scenic drives. Look out though! Maybe you’ll meet some of the characters who appear in this book!

  BOOBOOK OWL - Ninox novaeseelandiae: Hooty belongs to the Southern boobook owl family and is Australia’s smallest owl. Boobook’s are only about 30cm tall and nest in the hollows of dead trees. Dead trees make very important homes for animals and if possible need to be preserved. Very late on most evenings in Bethanga, Hooty can be heard making his very distinguished ‘mo-poke, mo-poke’ call. Have you heard one near your house?

  BURTON'S SNAKE LIZARD – Lialis burtonis: These are actually legless lizards (that look like a snake) and are very shy and completely harmless. They can be identified by their very distinctive wedge-shaped snout. Captain Pete once found one at home stuck in a fencepost hole he was digging. If you accidentally catch one release it carefully into some undergrowth preferably at night.

  BUSH DANCE - Out in the Aussie bush, people have been known to travel many miles to rustic old halls, or lanolin stained shearing sheds where the smell of freshly brewed tea, delicious scones, and mouth watering Pavlova is so inviting. A bush dance band will always play the Heel and Toe Polka; the easiest and most fun dance of all. Bush dancing is a wonderful way to make friends and to have fun! Sometimes Captain Pete plays guitar in a bush dance band; maybe one day you’ll spot him playing at a bush dance near you?

  EASTERN BEARDED DRAGON – Pogona barbata: If you stumble across a bearded dragon in the bush, they’ll usually freeze and use their camouflage to hide. If you step closer they’ll puff up and extend their beard and open their mouth to look really scary. They eat berries, leaves, fruits, flowers and insects.