Blue

by ML Nystrom

  “He’s good with the other dogs at the shelter, but—well, you’d need to see him. I’ll be blunt, Psalm. This dog has been through hell and back. He’s super big, he’s super strong, he’s super smart, and he’s super scared. We expected more aggression, but he spends his time cowering and hiding. Barely comes out of his crate. Food is an issue. He eats as if he thinks it will be taken away from him and we’re pretty sure he was starved, but he doesn’t show enough of a food aggression to the workers or to other dogs to be concerning. He needs a kind, patient hand and I think yours is one of the best. Can you take him, or do you want to meet him first?”

  My heart bled just a little for the abused animal, but part of being a good pet owner and good foster mom was being responsible.

  “Yes, I’d like to meet him first, but here at home with the other dogs. I’d like to see how he reacts to them before committing. Can we make that happen?”

  “I’ve got him here at the clinic’s kennels. Have a plan in mind?” Dr. Jackson asked. I could hear her rustling some papers in the background.

  “How ’bout you bring him around tomorrow night? If you’ll take the other dogs to the park for their nightly run, I can spend a little time with Sam. Toto will stay here as well. She doesn’t do the park much anymore and she’s a good influence to have around,” I answered, trying to think ahead. “Sam can get a sense of the place, I can get a sense of him, and when you bring the dogs back home, they can meet each other on home turf. There’s a street festival this weekend and if he stays, I’d like to get him settled in before the crowds come through.”

  “That would be perfect! Great! I really appreciate this,” the vet said. She was one of my favorite people.

  We chatted for a few more minutes and then hung up. I was pouring the batch of liquid soap into bottles when I heard the store bell ring. I didn’t jump every time someone came in, letting whoever it was browse for a bit, but I did greet everyone.

  “Hi! Welcome to Soap-n-stuff. Please let me know if you have any questions,” I called out while watching the level of a filling bottle.

  “Take your time,” I heard a very familiar masculine voice say.

  I almost overfilled the bottle. I hurriedly capped it off and turned to look through the workroom window facing the front counter. Blue was in my store, bending down to pet Toto who was napping in the sun from the window. Her tail thumped on the floor in a doggie greeting, but she didn’t bother to get up.

  Blue is in my store! And I was dripping with sweat, my hair was frazzled, and my makeup was gone. If I could have disappeared into the floor, I would have dug the hole in record time.

  Blue was in his brown and khaki uniform. He looked both official and officially hot. I felt those butterflies start again, and when he looked up at me from his position on the floor, they flew south. It had been such a long time that I’d crushed on this man and I didn’t know why it was still happening. I’d been married and loved another man, for Pete’s sake! I guess old habits die hard.

  I shook it off and put on my best, most relaxed, easy smile. My appearance bothered me but it couldn’t be helped.

  “Hello, Deputy. Decided on that soap I promised? I have a number of male scents you may like.”

  “Not here for soap, Ms. Kopolove. Just checking on street permits for the festival.” He grunted, standing up and walking to the front counter. “New thing the council started to increase revenues. Too many town vendors setting up side tables without paying space fees like other outside sellers.”

  I frowned. The town council was constantly claiming a lack of funding and was always trying to come up with more and more ideas to make more money. Some of them were legit but others pushed the bounds of the law. Either way, it meant I had to sell more soap to keep up.

  “Doesn’t seem right for me to pay a fee to set up a table outside my own store and on my own private property, Deputy,” I said crossly. “I already pay some pretty high taxes that should cover my obligation to the town. If I don’t pay the street fee, does that mean I can’t open?”

  “You can still open for the festival, but it does mean someone else can reserve and take the sidewalk spot in front.” He fingered a bar of Mayan Gold soap colored in swirls of deep yellow, black, and white. He brought the bar to his nose and inhaled the masculine, spicy scent deeply. It was one of my best sellers and I could imagine this scent doing well for him.

  “That’s ridiculous,” I stated, and I meant it. I crossed my arms over my chest and huffed a stray piece of hair from my face, my appearance forgotten in my anger. “We just had another property tax increase that was supposed to help fund pay raises for your department. From what I understand, that hasn’t happened. Now they’re asking for more?”

  “I agree with you, but I can’t do anything about it. I’m still waiting on that raise myself. You can bring it up at the next town council meeting, but for now you’ll need to pay the table fee or give up the spot. For what it’s worth, I am sorry you’re having to pay extra and you’re not alone. Nearly everyone I’ve talked to today doesn’t like this new rule too much.” He put the soap down and picked up another one. Coconut and lime scented on a diagonal of white and teal with a yellow stripe in between. He smelled that one too.

  I huffed again. “Thank you for telling me.” I tried to keep my miffed attitude, but I’ve always been slow to anger. I was probably the one person in the world who didn’t get mad when someone with a cartful of groceries got in line at the ten items or less express lane at the grocery store. I sighed and let it go, my arms dropping by my side. This really wasn’t Blue’s fault. He really was only doing his job, and it wasn’t an easy one. I was sure more than one store owner had already raked him over the coals for this decision that was out of his control. He looked tired, his face long and the hint of dark circles under his eyes. It wasn’t in me to make it worse. “I’m sorry for giving you a hard time. I know you’re just doing what you have to do and I really appreciate you for it.”

  He looked up at me from his perusal of my soaps. I smiled and blinked at him, mirroring my usual morning greeting. On impulse, I plucked a pale purple bar of soap from the display and handed it to him.

  “Here, please take this one as a thank-you gift from me to you. I know lavender is not the manliest of scents, but it is calming to the soul and you look like you could use a bit of calm.” I pressed the pale purple bar into his hand and he closed his blunt fingers around it. “You probably aren’t supposed to take gifts while in uniform, but surely a bar of soap isn’t a big deal.”

  He stared at me for a moment and grunted before dropping his eyes to the bar. He gripped it hard, and I saw his jaw tighten. “Thank you, Psalm,” he said roughly, finally using my first name but unable to meet my eyes as he spoke.

  He jammed his hat on his head and muttered a “haveanicedayma’am” to me before practically running from the store. Maybe he didn’t like lavender?

  Blue hustled down the sidewalk, intending to finish his rounds of the businesses that were on the vendor list for the street festival as quickly as possible. No one was happy about the new fees associated with the festival and he had even been cussed out by several. Psalm was the only one who didn’t blame the messenger. The pretty shop owner had even given him a gift, one he still clutched in his hand. He raised it to his nose and inhaled the scent. She was right. It was calming. Or maybe it was because she was the one who’d made it and handed it to him. Somehow that made the pale lavender bar more special. He tucked it into his shirt pocket so he would be able to smell it for the rest of the day.

  Four

  I spent the rest of my day experimenting with sample recipes, making more large batches, and working with customers. It was a good day in that the sun had brought out a lot of people to the town. Other vendors would be arriving tomorrow morning to set up for the big festival that would happen Friday and Saturday. I enjoyed the festivals and made a good profit during them. Lots of people were already thinking about Christmas gifts. Maybe
it wouldn’t be so bad having someone else set up in front of the store. Might increase foot traffic overall. I decided to let it go and let someone else have a chance at making some business happen this weekend.

  When I took the dogs to the park that night, I wondered with a little tummy flutter if I would see Blue with his kids again. He wasn’t there, but they were with their grandmother, Betsey. She was one of my regulars and the opposite of any grandmother I’d ever known. She was in her customary tight jeans, black-heeled boots, long-sleeved shirt with the shoulders cut out and her “property” vest with the Dragon Runners symbol on the back. She kept her hair long and dyed bright red. Some women had made comments about being someone’s “property,” saying it was disrespectful and demeaning. Betsey didn’t seem to mind, and, honestly, she was about as far from property as you could get. She did what she wanted when she wanted, always spoke her mind, and was not an easily intimidated person. She was also fiercely loyal to the club, her old man Brick, and her grandkids. Betsey was the kind of mama bear you’d want in your corner. All the “old ladies” I knew were just as confident of themselves and their place. Molly Stalone and Tambre Bearclaw were two of the other longtime club women. The three made a powerful trinity of womanhood. Confident, hardworking, secure in their places, and, for the most part, well respected in the town. If that’s what it meant to be “property” of a Dragon Runners member, that didn’t seem to be so bad.

  Betsey spotted me and waved. Her granddaughter, Michelle, was about six, and was currently swinging, pulling her legs and body back and forth to go higher and higher. Cody was a little younger, but I wasn’t sure by how many years. He was climbing on a contraption that looked like a half moon. He pulled himself to the top and sat on the uppermost bit, grinning and waving his triumph to Betsey. She clapped her enthusiasm.

  All of a sudden, his face changed. His happy smile dropped and he scrambled down the hexagonal bars. Michelle stopped her swinging abruptly with a puff of playground dust and a spray of mulch. She got up from the strap that formed the swing’s chair and walked slowly to get her school backpack. I saw Jonelle in the parking lot as she climbed out of her car and leaned on the door. Her arms were crossed and her nose high in the air. She didn’t speak to or go near Betsey. She just yelled for the kids to get a move on and get in the car. The two children went from happy, laughing kids to quiet robots in an instant. Betsey waved at them as they climbed into their mother’s car and drove away. It didn’t take a genius to figure out she was frustrated and couldn’t do anything about it.

  It was the kids I felt sorry for the most. They were the helpless ones as they were completely under the control of the different adults in their life and those adults couldn’t even control themselves. Adam and I had just adopted a puppy and were thinking about kids when we found out about his sickness. I didn’t get the chance to be a mother and perhaps never would. It was amazing how life interfered with plans.

  My mutts were my kids. I called them to me and went home to finish my evening routine. Or at least I tried to. I ended up tossing and turning, unable to turn my brain off. Thoughts of Blue, his children, and what was going on in his life disturbed me and even though I was not directly involved, I still felt empathy toward the suffering family. I lit a candle I’d scented with vetiver and bergamot to promote calm and ease. It didn’t work very well. I finally gave up sleeping with a sigh and went down once again to putter around in the workroom. If I couldn’t shut down enough to sleep, I’d at least get something done. Maybe try making some other calming scented candles. Even if they didn’t work for me, they might for someone else.

  Five

  I watched as Lindsey drove up to my store just after closing. She had the dog in her back seat and he’d crammed himself against the floorboards. It took her several tries to get him out, but he was pretty well leash-trained and didn’t fight once she snapped the blue leather strap onto his collar. He climbed out of the car and pancaked flat to the pavement, cowering down as low as he could go. My heart went out to the poor confused animal.

  His coat was brindled, and he was big, broad, and muscular, the bodybuilder version of a dog. His back and shoulder muscles were tensed up as he gripped the ground, showing off huge roundness and deep delineation. This dog was a true athlete and it showed.

  He also showed a tremendous amount of abuse. His muzzle, face, and neck were pockmarked with scars from many past fights. His ears were nothing more than tiny stumps, cut away as fighting dog owners did so that opponents would have less to grab with snapping jaws. Other scars both long and short covered his body, back, and flanks.

  I cringed along with the mixed-up and scared animal. He’d really been through hell in his previous life. I hoped I could help him get to a better place.

  Lindsey brought the paperwork for me to sign and gave me an update on Sam. She took the other dogs, except Toto, to the park and left me and Sam to become acquainted. I led him into the courtyard to scent the other dogs and watch his reaction. The hair on his back stayed flat and he didn’t show any aggression, but he was very cautious, still crawling and pancaking when in an open area. I knew he’d be more comfortable in a closed-in environment and brought him to the corner bistro table I kept in one corner. This was not my first rodeo with an abused animal and he did what I fully expected him to do. He cowered behind the flimsy piece of furniture, eager to have any sort of protection he could find. I sat next to him on the ground, coming down to his level. My pockets were full of bacon treats and I was ready to simply sit with him until the rest of the pack came home. I talked to him, keeping my voice calm, low, and slow, staying near but leaving him an escape route should he need it. I didn’t think I was his last hope, but Lindsey had mentioned she thought I was his best.

  I stayed there a long time talking to him. I told him about my other dogs and how they came to me before finding their forever homes. I told him about my life with Adam and my soap craft. I told him about how sorry I was he’d been treated so badly and promised he would find peace here. He didn’t move from his spot until Toto appeared. She came through the back doggie door that I had forgotten to secure earlier. I held my breath, not knowing how Sam would react.

  Sam sat up and took interest in her approach, but his back hair didn’t raise and he didn’t growl. Toto was walking stiffly as her arthritis was flaring again. She stopped when she got close to my seated position and finally noticed Sam. Both dogs looked at each other straight in the eye and were still. Toto was the first one to move. She nestled her way between my thighs and pushed the top of her head into my chest. This was her version of a doggie hug and had been her habitual greeting ever since puppyhood. Sam just watched. Toto flumped down with a sigh, curling up in the crook of my legs and putting her head and paw on my thigh. She grunted and sighed as she closed her eyes, as if saying “I’m where I want to be.”

  It was then that Sam approached, sniffing at the older dog’s head and ears. He looked up, his big gold eyes meeting mine for the first time. They were still full of confusion but also intelligence. Best of all, he didn’t show any fear of me or Toto. He inhaled in several short bursts, taking in my scent, and seemed to come to his own decision.

  With a flump of his own, he curled up next to me and put his head near Toto’s. She rewarded him with a lick to his stumpy ear. We stayed that way, me on the ground with the two dogs, stroking both canine heads until the sound of the other dogs came to my ears. The happy barks and yips stirred up Sam and he looked to me for guidance, but it was Toto’s calm presence that helped the most. She didn’t move other than to raise her head at the noise. Buddy, Zeke, and Dion scrambled into the courtyard and were expecting to be off-leash immediately but stopped short when they saw a new pack member. Since they were used to dogs coming in and out of our pack, this was not a big deal. Buddy came up to greet and sniff, followed by Zeke. Sam stiffened but stayed easy and didn’t hunch in an attack position. Toto put her paw over his as if saying “chill out, it’s just the kids coming
home.”

  After greetings and smells, Lindsey left to go home to her family with a wave and I got everyone fed and ready for bed. It was later than normal, but I still went through my nighttime routine. I glanced to see if Blue was home yet, but his lights were still off. The dogs piled on the bed with me and Toto climbed up the steps I’d put in for her to use. Sam watched but wasn’t sure about joining in. He really was big and I didn’t know how he would fit with the others crowded around. Toto woofed lightly at him and he leapt easily, his scarred body full of power. He settled in next to Toto, treating her like a mentor.

  Sleeping with that many bodies in my bed was not easy, but I managed. I also managed not to worry about Blue and fell asleep surrounded by warm doggie bodies.

  Blue opened the door to his tiny apartment and lightly tossed his keys on what passed for a kitchen counter. He pulled a beer out of the half-size refrigerator, twisted off the top, and took a long, cold swallow. He briefly thought about riding up to his spot on the bluffs but decided against it. The day had been long but uneventful for a change, so maybe he could actually sleep tonight. He had called his children earlier to check on them and listened to them chatter about their day. Jonelle was either in a good mood or she wanted something, as she didn’t try to cut the call short. He took another pull on the beer and went to his window to look across the street. The house was dark, so he assumed Psalm was sleeping. He imagined her bevy of canines were around her.

  Thoughts of what she would look like in her bedroom and in her bed filled his head. He imagined her bedroom to be soft and feminine like the woman herself. She probably slept in lacy nighties with pretty ribbons. He felt his body harden as an image appeared in his brain of her in a pale pink nightgown just see-through enough to tease but still be tasteful. He turned away from the window, feeling a just a little creeperish. Looking into someone’s windows was a serious invasion of privacy, although he could almost swear he’d spotted her watching him just out of the shower a few mornings ago. If she did see him, she got a show.