Dirty Tricks

by Kiki Swinson

  * * *

  “Hi, I’m Karlie Houston.” I introduced myself when the two white ladies showed up at the House two days later.

  “I’m Mrs. Baker and this is the visiting nurse, Ms. Cromwell,” the shorter of the two ladies replied, sticking her hand out for a shake.

  “Come in.” I welcomed them inside. I had given them a time to come when I knew Darwin had to go visit his parole officer. He thought I was playing, but I wasn’t. I needed to get rid of his ass so I could live in peace once and for all.

  The two women stepped inside and I walked them to the small living room. It was weird sitting down in the living room because as a kid Granny Houston never allowed anyone in there. In fact, the couches were still covered in their thick, hard, yellowing plastic slipcovers. The plastic cracked and cackled as the two ladies took a seat.

  “I called you in because I’ve found out that my uncle who is living here has been abusing my grandmother. He’s taking her money, barely buying her food or her medicine, and two days ago I caught him slapping her,” I snitched. It was against every street code I had ever learned, but I can’t front, it felt real good telling on Darwin.

  Mrs. Baker had a look of disgust scrawled across her face. Ms. Cromwell’s mouth sagged at the edges like she wanted to cry. I nodded at her.

  “That’s how I feel too . . . disgusted and sad,” I said.

  “How long have you been living here?” Mrs. Baker asked me.

  I hadn’t anticipated answering any questions about me. I shifted in my seat.

  “I wouldn’t exactly say I live here, but when I heard my grandmother was sick I decided to stay a few nights,” I lied. “Once I saw the conditions and what was going on, I just couldn’t bring myself to leave her here alone. I don’t live here full time per se, but I’m truly afraid for her life.”

  Mrs. Baker seemed to contemplate my answer. We exchanged a telling glance. She knew right away that I was smart enough to figure out that if they thought I was living there, once Darwin was out of the house, I would be the primary caregiver on record, and Granny Houston wouldn’t get her full services back, and I surely didn’t want that. I wanted Granny Houston to get all the help she could from the state.

  “Can we see her?” Nurse Cromwell asked, interrupting my thoughts.

  “Oh . . . yeah, sure,” I said, bouncing up from my seat. I led the women to my grandmother’s room.

  “Granny?” I called to her. “I have some nice ladies that want to see you. They came to make sure you’re okay,” I said softly.

  Granny Houston was groggy. All she could do was lift her hand and wave it lazily.

  “She’s just tired,” I said, making excuses, although it was kind of strange. She didn’t seem like herself, but I waved it off. I told myself that she was just extra tired.

  The nurse did a quick exam on Granny Houston and then turned toward me and Mrs. Baker with a strangled look on her face.

  “She’s got horrible bedsores. Some bruises around the ribs and on the legs. I don’t know if I can recommend that she stay here unless the alleged abuser is removed from the home at once. I think we should make a police report,” she said.

  I smiled wickedly. “Will my uncle be arrested?” I asked.

  “There’s a strong possibility. I mean, your grandmother has clearly been abused,” Nurse Cromwell replied, shaking her head like it was shameful.

  “I’ll make the report right away. If you’ll guarantee me you can stay overnight, I can have someone out here in the morning with an order to get him out of the home. It will be a crime for him to return,” Mrs. Baker said.

  “I promise to be here,” I said, raising my right hand.

  “Good. Then this should be an easy fix. I’m really glad you contacted us, Ms. Houston. We see hundreds of elderly patients a year that lose their lives because of frustrated caregivers. This could’ve been much worse if you hadn’t come over,” she said.

  “And that is a shame,” I said, breathing out heavily.

  “Your uncle will be held accountable and he will be excluded from this home. This nightmare should be over soon,” Ms. Baker assured.

  “Perfect,” I replied, smiling. “Absolutely perfect.”

  CHAPTER 12

  THE BEST LAID PLANS

  I was standing there smiling so wide every single one of my teeth was showing when the police came into the House, woke Darwin’s sorry ass up with a flashlight shining in his face, and told him he was under arrest for assault and battery and larceny. I think the feeling of warmth that exploded inside me seeing Darwin’s shock was better than an orgasm. I hadn’t ever seen my uncle’s eyes stretched so wide, and his trembling bottom lip made me want to laugh in his face.

  “You ain’t going to get away with this, you little bitch,” Darwin spat as he was led past me in handcuffs.

  I shrugged. “Whatever,” I said, blowing on my nails to signal that I was unbothered by his threat.

  “I got something for your ass. They can’t keep me but for so long. This ain’t no serious crime. I’ll be out in a few days. Trust me, you better be gone,” he continued.

  This time I laughed at him. There would be an order excluding him from Granny Houston’s home. For good.

  “Ay. Ay. Shut the fuck up making threats,” a tall, dark skinned police officer barked at Darwin, tugging on his handcuffs roughly. The cop smiled at me, though. I winked at him. Darwin seemed to swallow the rest of his words, and it looked like it pained him to do it.

  I let out a raucous belly laugh. “Yeah, shut the fuck up,” I taunted.

  With that, Darwin was gone.

  I stretched my arms up over my head and danced through the House for a few minutes. It felt damned good to have him out of my way. I walked down to Granny Houston’s room to make sure she was asleep. I twisted the doorknob slowly. I could hear the low hum of her snore. I smiled, stepped back, and quietly closed the door. She had no clue that the cops had just taken her problem off her hands. I set about making her some breakfast. I figured I’d leave it at the side of the bed with her morning medicines and when she was ready, she could just get it. My plan was to take care of Granny Houston, wait until evening when I knew she’d sleep through the night, and make my way to Aisha’s.

  When I was done taking care of my grandmother, I picked up the cell phone Aisha had given me and dialed her number.

  “Hey, girl,” Aisha answered.

  “Hey, chica. Sorry it took a few days to call. But, I’m finally ready to get things popping,” I said.

  “Yeah, I thought you had got cold feet and shit,” Aisha joked.

  “Hell no. I need to do this. But are you ready for this setup?” I asked, making sure.

  “You already know . . . shit, I was born ready for whatever,” Aisha replied.

  “So first things first . . . you got this dude’s hangout down pat, right?”

  We had a plan, but I wanted to make sure our shit was rock solid because it was risky and there was no room for mistakes. This was my last chance to be free.

  * * *

  I looked at myself one more time in the big standing mirror that sat behind the guest bedroom door in Aisha’s house. Between the blond wig, dark shades, and big hoop earrings, I thought I looked way different than my normal, mostly conservative style.

  “Yeah. You look like a regular old street ho. Definitely not like the Karlie they would be looking for,” I said to my reflection. I turned to look over my shoulder and check my ass in the dress Aisha had given me. I would’ve preferred something else, but this would do.

  “Girl, you got more booty than I remember,” Aisha said from behind me.

  I turned around, eyes wide. “Don’t sneak up on a bitch. I am jittery as hell as it is.”

  Aisha laughed. “When haven’t you been jittery? I always wondered how you were so jittery and gangsta at the same damn time.”

  We both laughed this time.

  “A’ight, so listen. I was right about the information I gave you. Jay K
ing hangs out at Club Broadway. Girl, they said he loves the hoes. So I got my team ready.”

  “I could just hug your ass forever and ever,” I replied, grabbing my friend tight.

  Kanye West’s new joint, Life of Pablo, pounded through the club’s speakers as I got lost in the crowd and played the corner that was not too far from the VIP that I couldn’t see but wasn’t close enough for anyone to notice me.

  Aisha and her little crew of chicks were already out there and in action. I looked out into the club as the partygoers swayed their bodies and moved their hips and feet. I got a sick feeling in my stomach as I remembered the last time Miley, Sidney, and I had gone to the club together. Suddenly I felt weak. I grabbed onto the wall and spoke to myself silently.

  Karlie, you have to be strong. This setup tonight is a matter of life and death. Stop it.

  Within a few minutes, I felt a little better. I spotted Aisha looking too damn cute. She had let her hair weave loose, and it fell in long auburn coils down her back. The bright white form-fitting jersey dress she wore accentuated all of Aisha’s hips and booty. She had on a banging pair of Loubs that made her look model-tall, and a full face of professionally applied makeup.

  Aisha had found out that Jay King liked his chicks to look like video vixens, and trust and believe, Aisha and her crew were fitting the part.

  I nursed a Hennessy straight as I kept my eyes peeled. Aisha had thought it was too dangerous for me to be out there, but I told her if we were going to make the nigga think she was turning me over to him, I needed to be nearby. I didn’t want to drag this operation out.

  I spotted Jay King easily. When he first entered the club, the dude seemed to be gliding on air as people moved out of his way like he President Barak Obama. From my view, everybody might as well have bowed down to his feet or something. Jay King was surrounded by at least twelve henchmen, and even from a distance, I could tell this dude had money.

  My stomach clenched as I watched him. I balled up my toes in my shoes and clenched my fists so tightly my knuckles paled. This was the bastard that had killed my sister.

  I was in a daze thinking about what all I wanted to do to Jay King when a small commotion erupted in the VIP. Jay King was being welcomed by the entire section. I swear this dude was sharper than a politician kissing babies. He was slapping hands and hugging his people. Then several women walked up and kissed him on the cheeks, some grabbed his hand and kissed his pinky ring. I was biting down on my bottom lip, taking it all in. Jay King and his crew were, of course, surrounded by throngs of women and a phalanx of his top men and security.

  I watched from afar, but I was so thrown by my anger, I decided to ignore Aisha’s plan, and I moved closer to the VIP section. I wanted to hear this dude’s voice, watch his movements, learn his habits, and look into his eyes. I moved from my hiding place, and as soon as I did, I suddenly felt a tight grasp on my elbow. My body stiffened and I clutched my purse, where I had Aisha’s gun hidden. She had paid a bouncer—that was the only way we could sneak it into the club. I rounded on the person touching me.

  “Fuck off me,” I growled, barely able to see him with the dark shades I’d kept on as part of my disguise.

  “I was just going to ask if I could buy you a drink,” the person said, quickly letting go when he saw the angry scowl on my face.

  “I don’t need a drink, and you don’t touch me like that,” I spat.

  The man threw his hands up and backed away. The little encounter had me shook. I didn’t want any attention focused on me.

  I could feel the heat of the man’s gaze on me as I made my way to an area closer to the VIP section. I was silently scolding myself for reacting so loudly.

  I took a seat where I could hear Jay King partying raucously. Women surrounded him as he tossed handfuls of one hundred dollar bills in the air, laughing as the women scrambled around on the floor like hungry dogs trying to grab handfuls of the money.

  “Call that one over here. The one with the big Amber Rose ass,” Jay King slurred, pointing to Aisha.

  Something inside me jumped as I grew excited to see our plan coming together perfectly. Aisha smiled and sauntered over to Jay King.

  He grabbed her and pulled her down next to him. He was whispering in her ear and she was giggling. That meant she was going to get to leave with him. That’s what we wanted.

  I saw Aisha pointing to her crew of hit girls. Jay King’s eyes went wide. I guess the possibility of having four beautiful video vixen chicks had made him excited.

  “Yo, buy all these bitches their own bottle!” he yelled. Loud laughter followed.

  I watched everything until Aisha signaled for me to go to the car. By the time the VIP section was almost cleared out, Jay King could hardly stand. He and Aisha were fondling and licking each other as his crew tried to urge him to leave.

  That was my signal. I followed the mass exodus of club goers out the doors toward the parking lot. I made it to the rental we had gotten and climbed in, pulled out the cell phone, and waited for Aisha’s text. My hands were shaking with anticipation so badly that when the phone finally vibrated with her text, I almost dropped the damn phone.

  YOU CAN GO HOME. ABOUT TO TELL HIM I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE. BE READY FOR THE NEXT STEP TOMORROW AT THE HOTEL LIKE WE PLANNED.

  I let out a long, nervous breath. “It’s almost over, Karlie. It’s almost over. You can do this.”

  CHAPTER 13

  THE DOUBLE CROSS

  I got back to the House and immediately knew something wasn’t right. I noticed the broken glass on the floor as soon as I walked in. I immediately grabbed the gun out of the bag and held it tightly in my hand. I think I was holding my breath as I moved slowly down the hallways like a cop.

  When I made it to my grandmother’s door, it was cracked. “Granny?” I called out softly. She wasn’t moving, nor did I hear any snoring.

  “Granny?” My voice went up a few octaves as I made my way inside. I didn’t have to even touch her to know.

  “Granny! Granny!” I screamed. I held the gun in one hand and touched her neck with my other hand. I didn’t feel any pulse.

  “Granny!” I screeched. “No! No!”

  “You did this to her. You killed her,” a deep voice said from behind me.

  I spun around, my gun out in front of me, my body trembling.

  “Who?” I started, but then he moved out of the shadows until I was face-to-face with him. I started shaking my head. He wasn’t supposed to be here. I thought I had taken care of him once and for all.

  “Surprised to see me? I guess your little plan didn’t work,” Darwin said, his eyes squinted into dashes.

  “I . . . you . . . were gone,” I stammered, unable to get my thoughts straight.

  “Yeah, that’s what you thought. But you see me standing right here like your worst fucking nightmare. Maybe having friends in high places that have bail money lying around ain’t so bad,” he said, chuckling evilly.

  I was speechless. Suddenly my entire body was hot. Things were falling apart right before my eyes.

  “Don’t be shocked. Be afraid because I’m about to collect a whole bunch of money and then I’ll be gone, and you . . . well, I don’t know what they’ll do with you,” he said. He jerked his head toward Granny Houston. “She needed to be put out of her misery anyway. So for that, I want to thank you. If you had never come around here fucking with me and my little hustle, I would’ve just been here wiping her ass, stealing her measly checks with no prospects of collecting on that hundred-thousand-dollar reward I’m about to get for your ass,” Darwin said with no remorse. He had his gun pointing at me.

  “Shit. Not again,” I mumbled under my breath as sweat beads as big as raindrops ran a race down my forehead and dripped into my eyes. I tried to blink them away as quickly as possible to keep my burning eyes from being closed too long. No second could be spared. I couldn’t afford to take my eyes off the piece-of-shit traitor in front of me. I am not sure if it was the anger or the sho
ck or both that had my knees knocking together, but whatever it was, my entire body trembled like a leaf in a wild storm. My heart thrummed so hard I felt like it was sitting outside my chest. I sucked in my breath and squinted. My nostrils flared on their own.

  Be tough, Karlie. You’ve been through worse, I told myself. I had certainly been through some shit over the past six months. My life had always been full of challenges, though. Nothing ever came easy for Karlie Houston. Not even childhood, when shit is supposed to be carefree and fun. I can’t remember a time in my life that was free of cares, worries, drama, and just plain old bullshit.

  I sometimes wondered why God was punishing me all the time. Abuse, poverty, death, and destruction were the words that summed up my existence.

  “I’m not playing with you.” I had finally found my voice. But I was immediately mad at myself because my voice was trembling like a scared child, and I couldn’t make it stop. I could see the amusement light his ugly face.

  “Oh, you think it’s funny? You must think I’m some punk bitch. But I’m telling you now, I will do it. I swear to everything I have left and everything I ever loved . . . I will do it. I don’t have shit else to lose,” I said through my teeth. That was the truth as plain as I could say it. I had nothing left to lose.

  The muscles in my arms burned as I kept them extended in front of me, elbows locked, grip tight. The bastard shook his head dismissively and smirked at me like he didn’t take me seriously at all.

  “What? What you gon’ do?” He chuckled evilly. All that was left was for him to stick his tongue out at me, stick his thumbs in his ears, and twist his hands like kids do when they tease each other. Fire flashed in my chest. I had never taken too kindly to being teased.