by Lisa Cassidy
There was a respect in Sparky’s voice as he spoke about the prince that Alyx hadn’t heard before. She glanced at Cayr’s unreadable features, still not understanding where this was going. Her father came and sat in the chair beside hers, reaching out to take her hand in his.
“We propose to unite the Egalion and Llancarvan families through the marriage of you and Cayr. When Prince Cayr reaches his majority, he can begin to take on more responsibility and influence. With you as his wife, carrying the power and fortune of the Egalion house, you will share a power base that could remove Casovar’s influence entirely.”
And there it was.
“You want me to marry Cayr.” She repeated his words, not sure she’d heard them correctly.
“Marry Cayr, and re-establish your influence amongst the court. Yes.”
Such a simple word, but it hit her like a blow.
“What about the king? He wants Cayr to marry Jenna, because that’s what Casovar wants.”
“All amongst the most senior lords have agreed to throw their support behind a betrothal between you and Prince Cayr. The king will have no choice but to agree. As influential as Casovar is, nobody will support the prince of Rionn marrying a mage’s adopted daughter. You are the most appropriate match for Prince Cayr, Alyx.”
“Every powerful lord... ” Alyx echoed. “You just got through telling me the threat Casovar’s telepathic magic poses to your plans, yet you’ve been talking to all the lords!”
“I didn’t tell them what I was planning.” Impatience threaded Garan’s voice. “I merely sought their views on a marriage between my daughter and the prince. From now on, we will all need to be very careful around Casovar.”
“I will make my father agree to this,” Cayr spoke for the first time, looking straight into Alyx’s eyes.
“This was your idea, wasn’t it?” she whispered.
“You are the one who pushed me, who wouldn’t let it go.” Fire filled his voice. “And you were right. I will be king of all of Rionn, not just the rich and powerful. What is happening to my people is wrong! I don’t know why Casovar has so much influence over my father, but I will do what it takes to deal with him.”
“You say we’ll be overrun within two years, Papa.” She tried to focus her thoughts, to think through what they were telling her. “Cayr won’t reach his majority for two years, yet you think we can push Casovar out before then? And what about my magic, the twins—we’re still half-trained, and without Casovar, we need to go back to DarkSkull to finish training.”
“Our marriage will solidify the connection of our two houses in the eyes of the other lords and increase your father’s influence at court,” Cayr answered for Garan. “You and I will solidify our influence with the youth of the court—the future lords that will be my power base. Casovar will find himself without allies. Together, your father and I, and Sparky, can begin taking on more of my father’s decisions. Eventually we’ll bring Astor back and formally replace Casovar.”
“And at that point you can go back to DarkSkull, if it’s still what you want,” Garan added. “The twins too. Astor’s job will be yours once you’ve passed your trials, and all three of you will be invaluable against the Shiven threat.”
Alyx rose from her chair and went to the other side of the room, her mind frozen with shock. She was being offered everything she had ever wanted, and with that, she was being given a chance to save her country, to fight back against Casovar. The pull of that was undeniable, the attraction of what had once been her greatest desires. But that was just it, she wasn’t that girl anymore. She was a young woman who loved Cayr, but only as her dear friend.
“Cayr, I’ve made things very clear to you,” she said.
“You have.” He couldn’t entirely keep the pain from his voice, but there was something in him she’d never seen before. A resoluteness and steel that belied his usual cavalier attitude. This was Cayr growing into a man, and part of her couldn’t help but be proud. “But this is what’s best for Rionn. You should know your father and I discussed our marriage before I knew about... well, I thought I was doing what we both wanted. I’m not trying to trap you, but I am determined to do what is right for Rionn.”
“I... ” His words shook her. “A marriage of friendship, is that what you really want? Because I don’t.”
“The prince is right, Aly-girl, this isn’t about either of you.” Her father rose.
There had been no condescension in his voice, but even so the words triggered anger inside her. “I understand that, but will you really force me into a marriage I don’t want? There has to be another way to deal with Casovar.”
“You know that I love you too much to force you into marriage, but I also think it’s time you grew up and realised you don’t live in a bubble,” he said firmly. “Life is not always fair.”
The words hung in the air for a long moment, and she wasn’t sure she’d heard them correctly. But the determined expression remained on his face, and her anger flared into a burning rage.
“Fair?” she whispered, her voice shaking with the force of the emotion she felt. “You think I won’t face reality, Papa, that I don’t know what life is really like?”
“Alyx—”
“I’ll give you reality,” she said coldly. “How about my first year at DarkSkull Hall? Did I tell you about the Shiven apprentice there that tried to kill me? He would have succeeded too, on more than one occasion, had it not been for the son you don’t even know, my friends who you think aren’t good enough for me, and sheer luck.”
Garan blanched, as did Cayr. Both men reached for her.
She stepped back. “Did I tell you about the man who stood over Tarrick lying unconscious on the ground and tried to slit his throat? Did I tell you that I looked at that man, wanted him dead, and my magic killed him? Or how I watched his head explode into a mess of brain and blood right in front of me?”
She stopped briefly, chest heaving, unable to stop the torrent of words. “And then I chose, willingly chose, to go back to that hell because I thought I could help Rionn. This time I was beaten within an inch of my life on a sparring yard while all the students watched. The mage master was going to let my opponent kill me, and he would have, if I hadn’t somehow managed to drag myself off the icy ground and fight back the way that Dashan taught me.
“And once I finally began to make some progress there, I was arbitrarily summoned back home and told to hold my tongue while being mocked and humiliated for weeks by a lord-mage who thinks I’m useless. I did all of that because you asked me to, and you stand there and accuse me of needing to grow up! You told me to trust you, yet you’ve betrayed me in the worst way imaginable.”
There was a moment of stunned silence after she stopped, panting, emotion roping through her. Her forearms were alight with a silver-green glow. Through the blurred vision of the tears in her eyes, Alyx saw Cayr’s horror, Sparky’s grim acknowledgement of her words and her father, suddenly looking older than she’d ever seen him.
“Alyx, I’m sorry,” Garan said eventually.
“You sent me there,” she whispered. “You knew, you had to know, my mother went through the same thing. Yet you sent me there, and you refused to think about what that meant for me. So don’t you dare tell me that I have no grasp on reality, or on what’s fair!”
“You’re right, that was wrong of me,” Garan admitted. “You have clearly suffered already, and that breaks my heart, but it doesn’t change anything. You say you want to protect Rionn, and this is how you can do it.”
“I don’t love Cayr.” She looked at her childhood friend now. “I’m sorry, I don’t. The last thing I want in the world is to cause you pain, but I won’t lie to you either. If I did this, it would never be real.”
Cayr opened his mouth to reply, but Garan cut him off. “Prince Cayr, Sparky, will you give me a moment alone with my daughter?”
“It’s probably best if we both make a brief reappearance at the ball, to avoid Casovar becoming
suspicious.” Sparky went to the door and opened it to allow Cayr out before him. “We’ll be back soon.”
There was another moment’s silence after the door closed, the only sound in the room coming from the crackling of the fire in the grate. Alyx’s anger was fading, and with it the green glow of her magic. “Papa—”
“Alyx, no matter what happens between you and Cayr, Dashan can’t be yours,” Garan’s voice cut her off.
“How could you know that?” she asked angrily. Her father met her eyes, and they were bleak with a terrible understanding.
“He’s a Taliath.”
The words cut through the room like a knife. Alyx stilled, the equal weight of despair and horror expanding and filling her chest until she couldn’t breathe.
Then her heart broke.
Chapter 20
“No,” she whispered.
“You think I would be wrong about something like that?” Garan said softly. “I’m sorry, it’s true. If you think about it, you know too.”
Of course she knew.
The only shock was how she’d not realised it sooner. His agility and grace, his sublime skill with a weapon, with command. His instinctive tactical sense—he’d had those militia soldiers eating from his hand. How hadn’t she seen it? Because she’d been conditioned not to—because they all had. Dashan was worthless, half-Shiven, a young man who preferred drinking, women and gambling over doing anything remotely serious. What a fool she’d been.
And how close to disaster they’d both come.
She nodded, dropping into a chair as her legs turned suddenly rubbery. Her mouth had gone dry and all the anger had drained from her. Now there was only an odd kind of numbness.
“There can be no future for you with Dashan, not with what you both are. You would be hunted and destroyed. The danger of what you might become—”
“You don’t need to tell me of all people the consequences.” She cut him off, unable to bear hearing it all again.
Garan moved to kneel before her, one tentative hand coming out to touch her hair. “I hadn’t realised that you and Dashan were… or I would have told you about him sooner. I’m sorry, but you have no other choice. Rionn needs you to do as we ask.”
Oh Dashan, I’m so terribly, terribly sorry.
Because she couldn’t say no to this. Couldn’t refuse to help save her country, the beautiful city she loved so much. But more than that, it was because in the past two years she’d become someone who couldn’t even consider doing this to her friends... to put them in this position. Horror turned her stomach at the thought. All of them hunted mercilessly by the council. Tarrick’s bright future ruined. They would stand by her, and they would die for it. And Dashan would too. Her heart lurched.
And underneath all that a trickle of fear—could she become another Shakar if she were invincible... surely not? But still that doubt wormed through her, insidious and potent.
Just like going to DarkSkull, there was no choice for her here. Only acceptance.
“I’ll do it,” she managed around the lump in her throat, unable to help the tear that trickled down her cheek.
“I am so sorry, Aly-girl.” Her father’s voice was thick with sadness.
Alyx looked up to meet his eyes. “I don’t understand. You always treated him like he was nothing, like he was a waste of your time.”
“I’ve known since he was about thirteen,” Garan admitted. “By pretending he was nothing, by encouraging others to do the same, I was trying to protect him. Why do you think I allowed his close friendship with you and Cayr despite what I said about him? It kept him under my protection.”
“That’s why you’ve been so insistent I stay away from him, ever since I told you what I am. Did you truly think him not worthy of me, or was it all a pretence?”
“In all honesty, I’m not sure what I think of Dashan. I’m certainly aware of his reputation, but I also knew the boy and young lad he was. He was a good friend for you and Cayr. He grounded you both.”
“More lies and secrets,” she whispered, more tears spilling now. “You promised me no more.”
“This was not my secret to tell.”
“If you’ve known for so long... you could have trained him. You and the king were looking for Taliath potentials.”
“Yes, we were, but you already know a part of me suspected that potentials were going missing along with mages. Besides, if it was known that not only was I a living Taliath, but was personally training one of them? It would have increased the danger surrounding all of us—especially you, and I wasn’t willing to do that.”
“I don’t believe this,” she whispered.
“You cannot breathe a word of this to anyone, not even Dashan,” Garan said. “Ignorance protects him. He lives only as long as he escapes council notice. I know you’re upset, but please, hear me on this!”
She shook her head, some of her fire returning. “I know what it’s like to have part of your identity kept from you your whole life, and now you’re asking me to do that to him?”
“I’m asking that you use your judgement. You know him better than I do. Will he accept that he has to hide, keep himself away from Casovar and the council? When you go back to DarkSkull in a couple of years, will he agree to stay here?”
No. Dashan wasn’t afraid of the Mage Council, and he certainly wouldn’t let fear of them stop him from doing anything, no matter how much danger he was in. And if he thought they posed a danger to her... he’d go right for them. A shiver racked her as she realised how perilously close to discovery they must have come in Tregaya, with Dashan’s skill and command ability on such clear display to mages like Rothai.
“Aly-girl?” he asked gently.
A sudden thought occurred to her, a potential solution. “Send him to Ladan.”
“What?” Her father looked startled.
“The two of them have a plan,” she said quickly. “Part of Widow Falls’ lands are close to the Tregayan border. If things come to war with Shivasa, they have a plan to move troops quickly and safely.”
“Alyx—”
“Papa, this will hurt Dashan badly. Send him to Ladan, give him something productive to do. It will keep him far away, out of sight of Casovar and the council. Please!”
“All right.” Garan nodded. “I’ll talk to his father and have him issue the orders in the morning.”
Her shoulders sagged. “Thank you.”
“Alyx…” he hesitated. “I think it would also be best if we made it clear you only came with Dashan tonight because he is an old friend of yours and Cayr’s. For the same reason Dashan can’t know what he is, it can’t be known that you and he were... ”
“You’re right,” she said heavily. She was already about to cut ties with Dashan, she may as well repudiate everything they’d shared as well. The numbness was creeping back, holding off the terrible knowledge of what this was going to do to Dashan, of what it was going to do to her.
Garan sank back on his heels, looking utterly lost. “I never wanted you to have to go through what your mother and I did. How did we end up here?”
“You would have been better to send him away as a boy,” she said bitterly. “Then I would never have known him.”
“You don’t mean that,” he said quietly.
“No, I don’t.” She wiped furiously at her eyes.
A knock came at the door then, and she straightened, pulling away from her father’s touch. “You’d better let them in.”
She rose as her father opened the door to let the two men back in. Cayr’s eyes went straight to her, and she nodded. “I’ll do what you’re asking.”
He nodded soberly. “Thank you, Alyx.”
Her father glanced between them. “We’ll start putting it about quietly that the two of you are formally courting, close to becoming betrothed. As soon as we can get the king to agree, we’ll announce the betrothal officially. I’d like to aim for a marriage within the year, that will give you a good period of time before Cayr rea
ches his majority to begin building your base of influence.”
“Then it’s done.” Cayr nodded at her father, looking more authoritative than he ever had. He was hiding his hurt well, she thought, and hoped she could do the same. Maybe in time they could repair what had been fractured between them.
General Sparkish cleared his throat. “We’d best all leave separately. Lady Egalion, you and Prince Cayr first. Lord Egalion and I will linger here a while.”
A sense of unreality settled over her as Cayr offered her his arm and they walked out of the room and back towards the ball room. The hubbub of conversation, laughter and music crashed over her, breaking her from her daze as she stepped into the room. Her gaze immediately found Dashan. He was on the other side of the room, smiling that laughing smile of his, talking with his father and Lord-Mage Casovar.
He looked up then, meeting her eyes clear across the space between them. The smile on his face widened, then his gaze shifted to her hand on Cayr’s arm.
He knew.
The brightness in his brown eyes dimmed and all the laughter faded from his features. Then without a word to either Casovar or his father he turned and walked out of the room, not looking back once. Her chest tightened so thoroughly she struggled to breathe for a long moment.
“We should dance.” Cayr’s jaw was clenched, his blue eyes dull. He’d no doubt seen what she had. Nonetheless his voice was soft as he held out his hand to her. And she’d promised to do this, so she took his hand and allowed him to lead her onto the dance floor.
She resolutely refused to look in the direction Dashan had gone.
Alyx and Cayr made a good show of it for the rest of the evening. They shared most of the formal dances together, and spent the time in between standing together talking, or making rounds of the room as a couple, speaking to the more important nobles.
Eventually, she pled exhaustion and Cayr walked her out to her father’s carriage. They came to a hesitant halt before the open door.
