The Emi Lost & Found Series

by Lori L. Otto

Emi continues to flirt relentlessly with me as we ride down the elevator.

  “You’re driving me crazy, Emi,” I tell her, my hands nothing short of groping her as her tongue teases mine.

  “I can make it worse,” she whispers.

  “I don’t think you can.” And then, with that statement that she obviously takes as a dare, her painted lips lift to my ear and whisper the dirtiest words I have ever heard escape her pretty little mouth. I stand in amused awe as the elevator door opens, and she struts out.

  “That’s it,” I state firmly, grabbing her quickly, still half-way in the elevator keeping the doors open, and I pull her back as she giggles and struggles to pull me into the lobby with her. “We’re going back up.”

  “Later,” she laughs with a blush and tugs on my arm. Out of the corner of my eye, I see another woman approaching the elevator, so I relent and hit the ‘up’ button for her as I follow Emi. I run into her back when she stops abruptly. Has she changed her mind? I wrap my arms around her and kiss her cheek, noticing a second too late that the woman has stopped right in front of us. I look up sheepishly.

  I recognize Nate’s mother immediately even though it had been over a year since I last saw her. The memory of her crying in the hospital had brought tears to my eyes for days, the guilt overtaking me. But I was forgiven. I take a deep breath, again reconciling those feelings.

  “Donna!” Emi says, surprised, prying my already falling hands from her body. I clear my throat and stand up straight with an apologetic smile. Emi and Donna embrace tightly.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t call first,” she says, looking at me and grinning. “It looks like you’re on your way out.”

  “Yeah, um, Donna, this is Jack,” Emi tells her with a smile. “Jack, this is Nate’s mother.”

  “It’s so good to see you again, Donna,” I tell her, shaking her hand. She lets go quickly and hugs me, too.

  “Likewise, Jackson, it’s been a long time,” she says with a thoughtful look in her eyes. “Is Emily here what’s been keeping you away from the foundation? I mean, your donations are always generous and welcome, but we’ve missed you.”

  “She’s part of the reason,” I tell her, revealing my distraction for the second half of last year. In the first half, shortly after Nate died, I was consumed by my guilt. I couldn’t bear the thought of seeing his mother, feeling somewhat responsible, even if it didn’t make sense to feel that way. Using charitable work as one of the conditions of my self-imposed atonement, I focused my efforts on other organizations just to avoid her. I was a coward and I knew it.

  Just seeing her now, I have a sickening feeling in my stomach.

  “Well, I can forgive you for that,” she says kindly. “I didn’t realize you knew one another.”

  “I’ve been friends with Emi’s brother, Chris, since college.”

  “Oh, well, did you know Nate?” she asks.

  “No. I only met him last New Year’s Eve, at the party...” My voice trails off to silence.

  “Wait,” Emi interjects, her brows furrowed in confusion. “How do you know one another?”

  “Jackson is one of my children’s hospital charity’s biggest contributors,” Donna informs her. “He has been for years.”

  Emi looks at me, confused. “Oh, okay.”

  “I haven’t seen you since the night of the accident,” Donna directs her comment to me, “at the hospital.” I wasn’t sure if she had even recognized me at the time. I nod as Emi cocks her head in my direction.

  “I’m very sorry,” I tell her. She squeezes my arm, looks at me warmly.

  “Listen,” Donna says, “I don’t want to hold you two up. I was just in the area shopping with a friend and thought I’d stop by and say hello.”

  “It’s no problem,” I begin, looking to Emi, “if you wa–”

  “Um, Donna, why don’t you and I have lunch one day this week,” Emi suggests.

  “That sounds great. Are you free Tuesday?”

  “I am. Sushi?”

  “That would be perfect,” Donna agrees. “Why don’t we meet at 1:30?”

  “I’ll be there. It’s so good to see you,” Emi says, taking my hand again and weaving her fingers in between mine.

  “You too, sweetie, and you look fantastic.” Nate’s mother glances at our hands.

  “Thanks, so do you... I’ll see you Tuesday.”

  “And Jackson, don’t be a stranger,” she says. “The kids at the hospital always loved it when you would stop by for story hour.”

  “I’ll make it a point to schedule some time soon,” I tell her.

  “Good. I’ll see you soon.” Donna’s driver helps her into a black sedan, and we watch the car drive away as we wait for the valet to bring my car around. Emi handled that very well. If she had any reservations about us, this meeting would have been rather awkward. I smile to myself.

  “Okay, so that’s weird that you know her... but even weirder that you never told me that.”

  “It just never came up,” I explain. “It’s not like I know her well, anyway. We would see each other once or twice a year at events, that’s all.”

  “And you were at the hospital that night?” she asks.

  “I’ve told you that I drove Chris, Jen and Anna there. Chris was in no shape to drive.”

  “Will you tell me about it?” she says as we get into my car.

  “Really?” I ask, unsure that I want to get into this tonight.

  “Yeah,” she says as I take my seat and close the door. “I want the story from a neutral party.”

  I sigh heavily. “I am certainly not that,” I begin. “You have no idea what that did to me.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “In a matter of about three hours, it went from one of the best nights of my life to the worst. When I danced with you, and you looked into my eyes, that was it for me. It didn’t matter that you had a boyfriend. Somehow, I wanted to be with you. And by the end of the night, I had started plotting how I was going to make that happen. You were the maid of honor, I was the best man... it was the perfect scenario, and I was going to engage you in the most intense wedding preparation known to man or woman. I was thinking weekly meetings, over drinks, whatever it took to get more time with you.

  “And then I was there when your call came in to Chris. His account of what was happening... the fear of not knowing...” I stop talking, the memories of that night rushing back, impaling me.

  “I didn’t realize...” she says, “how you felt... already, back then?”

  “I’m telling you, Emi,” I say. “From our first kiss, I just knew... so when they brought you out on the stretcher, I just watched from a distance as your family ran in behind you. I was torn. I wanted to know every detail, but who was I? Some random guy you danced with... and kissed ten years previous. So I waited outside for bit, and I was there... when the second ambulance... God.” I shake my head to make the sights of that night disappear as we get out of the car at the arena.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispers, taking my hand in hers.

  “That vision will stay with me forever.” And– forgiven or not– so, apparently, will this regret.

  “Hey,” she says, her hands on my cheeks. “I’m here, and I’m fine and I’m with you.”

  “And I’m grateful for all of that.” I hug her tightly, lifting her feet off the ground and holding her momentarily. She kisses my cheek before I set her down. Hand in hand, we follow the crowd inside.

  “So how did you get these tickets?” Chris asks, watching the Rangers’ warm-up skate from a private box in the middle of the rink. I glance at the bleacher seats sitting in front of our suite and smile as Emi explains the rules of hockey to Jen and Brian.

  “One of my clients. He has seats to all the sporting events, but he doesn’t like going to the afternoon games. I had no idea your sister was so into hockey.”

  “Yeah, she loves going to games. Thanks for inviting all of us.”

  It was the first time Chris and I had
spoken since his house-warming party nearly a month ago. That had been an awkward day. I can’t remember another time when we’d had such a disagreement. It made sense, though. He had an overwhelming need to protect his sister, I got that. I was just shocked at his sudden distrust in my intentions with Emi. It was like he didn’t know me at all, and I knew he did. I had always been completely respectful to everyone I met, not just the women I had dated. And it wasn’t like there was a long string of women in my past. I believe in committed, monogamous relationships, and had had only a few of those over the many years I had known Chris.

  And he always came to me for advice in his relationships. I knew he looked up to me. This was just about her. I couldn’t blame him. I open a couple of beers and take one to him, sitting down next to him to watch the game.

  “Listen, I’m sorry about New Year’s Eve,” Chris says. I was never worried about our friendship, and didn’t even think it needed to be discussed, but it was nice that he brought it up.

  “Water under the bridge,” I tell him. “No need to apologize.”

  “Well, I had no right to interfere. I was worried about her. I felt like she was using you as a distraction. Not using you, not intentionally, you know.

  “I knew she was really vulnerable that day.”

  “I knew that, too,” I remind him.

  “What I didn’t know is how close you two had become. When we had dinner a few months ago, you two seemed intentionally distanced from each other. I wasn’t sure it was going anywhere, if you were just friends, what was going on. And she didn’t talk to me about you.”

  “It was all intentional. She wanted to be sure of her feelings.”

  I never talked to Chris about Emi, either. Before I had asked her out the first time, I ran it by him... but that was pretty much the first and last time I talked to him about her. Emi had wanted to keep it private, so I did. I normally would anyway. Sure, Chris was my best friend, but I wasn’t one to kiss and tell. Well, the one time I did– when I confessed that Emi had kissed me in college– I paid dearly for it with a black eye that lasted a few weeks. I had anticipated that reaction from him then, actually, even though he wasn’t a violent person. He was just that protective of her. And maybe a little drunk. He felt horrible immediately after.

  “She seems pretty sure of them now. Emi came over last week, and I have to admit... I hadn’t seen her that happy... since him... she was glowing.”

  “I love her, Chris,” I tell him.

  “So I have to ask...” her brother hesitates. “Have you changed your mind about what you told me a few years ago?”

  “Which was...”

  “That you were never going to ask another woman to marry you after Caroline...”

  “Yes,” I tell him. “I was hurt then, and angry. But Emi changes everything.”

  “Because I know she wants a husband... and children... if she can’t have that with you...”

  “It’s kind of soon to be talking about that, isn’t it?” I ask.

  “Is it? You don’t take these things lightly. I know you, Jack. I know you’ve considered the possibility.”

  “I have.”

  “I just don’t want to ever see her hurt again.” I nod in understanding, having no intention of ever causing Emi any pain. “Have you told her about Caroline?”

  “Not yet,” I tell him. “Is it even relevant?” It has never seemed important for me to bring her up to Emi. Although the relationship ended poorly, and wrecked me in some ways in the end, it is all insignificant in hindsight. Emi was all I ever wanted.

  “You’ve seen all of her baggage,” he says, his undertones telling me I should tell Emi about that painful part of my life. “You should probably show her a little of yours.”

  “Noted,” I tell him without looking at him, my response clipped, signaling the end of this conversation.

  The lights in the arena dim slightly, a spotlight shining on an American flag hanging from the rafters. Chris and I move to the row behind the rest of our group in the bleacher seats as the national anthem is sung. I rub Emi’s shoulders, surprising her with my touch at first, as the hockey game begins.

  “Refills?” I ask everyone, the group nodding in unison.

  “Let’s go into the suite and toast,” Anna says as she holds Chris’s hand. They smile lovingly at one another. We all get up and go back into the box as I hand out fresh beverages to everyone. Chris and Anna stand in front of us, hands poised for a toast. Jen and Brian have a seat on a leather couch across from the chair Emi has chosen to sit in. When I hand her a glass of wine, she stands up, offering the chair to me. I sit down and she settles into my lap, putting her arm around my shoulder and planting a chaste kiss on my lips. She’s already tipsy.

  “What are we toasting to?” Brian asks.

  “A Rangers win!” Emi exclaims.

  “Have you had anything to eat today?” I whisper in her ear. She shakes her head.

  “Sure,” Anna laughs. “To a Rangers win,” she adds, holding her bottled water and taking a sip.

  “Anna... water?” I ask, knowing how much of a wine connoisseur Chris’s wife is.

  “Well, that was really what I wanted to toast to. We’re pregnant,” she announces, placing her hand on her stomach. Even with her petite frame, I can already see a small bump under her form-fitting shirt.

  Emi just smiles, seemingly in on the secret. Jen and Brian stand up to congratulate them.

  “Did you know?” I ask, nudging her off my lap. She nods as I stand up to shake Chris’s hand and hug Anna tightly. “You didn’t waste any time,” I say to them, smiling.

  “How far along?” Jen asks.

  “About twelve weeks,” Chris says. “She just told me yesterday.”

  “I just wanted to make sure everything was okay before telling everyone,” Anna sighed. “The doctors say everything looks good.”

  “I saw the sonogram,” Emi says, small tears barely noticeable in the corners of her eyes. “It’s beautiful.” I move behind her and wrap my arms around her, kissing her cheek. I can feel her sigh heavily against my body.

  “Clara is going to be so excited!” Emi’s sister says. “I’m so excited. I’m finally going to be an aunt!” Everyone gets quiet, all eyes go to Emi. “I mean–” she stutters.

  “No,” Emi says as I hear the brave smile in her voice. “Being an aunt is the best. You get to spoil them and do all the fun things you want... and then when they get cranky or angry, you just send them back to their parents.”

  “It’s true,” Chris agrees. “Same for uncles. I guess now I’ll get to deal with the consequences of too much sugar and too little sleep.”

  Jen still looks remorsefully at Emi. Brian massages her neck slowly, his eyes diverted to the floor, obviously sensing her discomfort and likely knowing the reason why.

  “Jen, it’s fine,” Emi says as she removes my arms and walks over to her sister.

  “I’m sorry, Em,” she whispers, hugging her tightly.

  “Don’t make me cry,” Anna says, weepy. “I’m already so hormonal.” She joins the other two women in an embrace and they all sniffle quietly before laughing together.

  A horn sounds in the arena, signaling a home-team goal. Emi perks up immediately and runs back out to the bleachers, Chris following behind her quickly to cheer on the team. He puts his arm across her shoulder and kisses the top of her head. She pulls him closer as the celebratory song plays over the loud speakers. Eventually, Anna goes to join them.

  “Brian, do you like any other sports?”

  “Baseball,” he says. “I played in college before I hurt my arm.”

  “What position?”

  “Catcher.”

  “Pitcher,” I smile. “State champions in high school.”

  “What year?”

  “1993,” I tell him. “In Jersey.”

  “Nice. 1991 champs. New York.”

  “Do you still play?”

  “Yeah, for fun.”

  “When my brot
hers come to town, we get a group of our old friends together to play. I’ll have to invite you next time. We need a good catcher.”

  “I’m in,” Brian answers.

  An arena employee enters the suite with a cart of food. He sets up a small buffet on a table near the back of the room. I tip him before he leaves, then walk to the bleachers to let Emi know.

  “The food is here,” I tell her, Chris and Anna. “And you, my dear, need to eat something.”

  “I’m fine,” she grumbles playfully, stumbling a little on her way back into the suite.

  In the second period, I get a phone call from Kelly’s husband, Thomas. Ducking into the hallway to hear a little better, I answer the phone.

  “Hey, Jacks... I just got your message about Colorado. Is everyone in?” he asks me.

  “Yeah, I think so,” I tell him. Every year in March, the whole family gets together for a week-long vacation. I had treated my parents and siblings to a vacation the spring after I sold my company. We had such a great time that I decided to make it a yearly tradition, even though the size of the family has nearly doubled since that first time. It’s a small price to pay to get everyone together at least once a year.

  “The kids can’t wait... is Emi coming?”

  “I haven’t asked yet,” I explain.

  “Too soon for the parents to meet her?”

  “Oh, no, not at all. I definitely want them to meet her,” I tell him quietly. “It’s just been a crazy couple of months.” I say months, and even though I’ve been committed to her for those months, she really wasn’t sure about us until a few weeks ago. I don’t want to rush her into anything she’s not ready for, so I was trying to give us some time before telling her about the yearly tradition.

  “Your brothers are in, too?”

  “They are. I talked to Matthew yesterday. He and Lucas are flying in on Saturday. I think he said Steven and Renee are doing the same. She’s going to bring her daughter this time.”

  “Oh, that’s good. Maddie and Jackie will be happy to hear that. They had a lot of fun the last time they all came up from Texas.”

  “Was Brandon going to bring a friend?” My nephew had been the odd man out last year, too old for the kids activities and too young for the adult ones. I had told him he could invite a friend if he wanted to.