by Nia Arthurs
When massaging doesn’t work, I wash my face with water. The cool liquid slips down my cheeks to my shirt. I shiver from the cold.
At least it worked.
My feet patter against the floor.
After everything, I’m grateful Brit and Win kicked me out. If not for them, I wouldn’t have needed a house. If not for the house, Danny and I would never have had the space to figure our relationship out.
The moment I step into Brit’s bedroom, my friends zero in. “Who was that?”
“I told you.” I sit on the edge of the bed. “It was nobody.”
“Nobody?” Winnie arches an eyebrow. “If that were true, you wouldn’t have fled to the bathroom just to have a conversation.”
I wince. She has me there.
“Let me see your toes,” Britney instructs.
I raise my legs and swing around, wiggling my little piggies for her inspection. She lowers her face near my feet and observes each one like a detective.
“Alright.” Britney nods her approval. “We’re good.”
Winnie folds her arms over her chest. “By any chance, were you talking to Danny?”
“Well…”
Britney gasps. “You’re right. It was him!”
Winnie flails her arms, causing the mattress to bounce. “What did he want? Is he angry?”
“It wasn’t your fault.” Britney pats her arm. “Brock was the one who punched him.”
“Yeah, but she was the one who kissed him,” I mumble.
Both Britney and Winnie stare at me.
I know I’m being bitter, but I’m still annoyed that Win made out with Danny. He came all the way from Belize City intending to make me his girlfriend.
Now whenever I remember the night my crush turned into something real, I’ll remember Winnie with her legs wrapped around my guy.
It’s a horrible picture.
“I already told you,” Winnie says, glaring at me. “I was drunk.”
“Britney’s been drunk a hundred times and she doesn’t go around making out with people.”
“Why are you getting so upset?” Winnie’s expression shifts in an instant. “Oh my go—did Danny say something?”
“Not particularly…”
“What did he tell you?” Britney drops the flat iron on the desk and scoots over to me. “Did he mention the kiss? Did he like it? Hate it?”
“I’m a phenomenal kisser.” Winnie flings her half-straight, half-curly hair over her shoulder. “Why wouldn’t he like it?”
The last thing I want to discuss is whether Winnie’s tongue in Danny’s mouth was an example of her sexual prowess. I pretend I haven’t heard them. “Brit, I think my toes are dry now.”
“Wait ten more minutes.” Britney bends her head close to my toes and blows on them. When she straightens, she turns to Winnie. “Have you heard from Brock?”
“He called early this morning, but I didn’t answer.” Winnie tosses her phone in front of me. “He’s bawling about us getting back together, but after the stunt he pulled last night I wouldn’t touch him with a ten-foot pole.”
“If you didn’t want to give him hope, why did you dance with him?” I ask.
Britney snorts. “Dance? They were basically doing it in front of everyone.”
“Don’t get judgmental on me.” Winnie taps the floor with her foot. “It was just for one night. I was drunk. It didn’t mean anything.”
I study Winnie, playing her words over in my mind. “Did it help?”
“Did it help what?”
“The drinking? The dancing? The kissing? Did it make you feel better?”
Her face pulls in so tight it looks like she’s sucking on a slice of lime. “That’s none of your business.”
“It’s a valid question.” Britney peers at Win. “You should answer.”
“I don’t feel like it.”
I’m half-frustrated and half-sincere when I say, “I understand. Your parents are getting divorced, and you’re having a rough time. How far are you going to take it just to punish them?”
“Since when did you become our moral compass, Gwen? If you have a problem with my choices, maybe we shouldn’t be friends.”
“Win!” Britney yells.
“It’s fine.” I climb off the bed and push my feet into slippers. I’m done with this. Winnie’s messed up over and over, but I always make excuses for her. Not anymore.
“Win, apologize,” Britney hisses. “She was just trying to help.”
“She should apologize.”
I sigh and walk out of the room. Tears sting my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. Winnie can self-destruct all on her own. I’m done.
Britney follows me. She catches my elbow and yanks me around. “Don’t leave like this, Gwen. You know Winnie. She’ll explode for a few days and then everything will go back to normal.”
“It can’t go back to normal, Brit. She’s right. I am different.” I tap my chest. “I’ve changed. I can’t follow Win around by the nose anymore.”
“What is this really about?” Britney leans in. “If you say Haiti, I’ll scream.”
“It’s not about Haiti. It’s about me.”
“You’re the same Gwen you’ve always been. You’re just… less fun.”
Wow. She’s not pulling any punches is she? “Sorry to disappoint.”
“Are you just gonna walk away?” Britney yells at my back. “We’ve been through too much to let things end like this.”
I say nothing.
Just focus on the door, Gwen.
“Fine!” Britney yells. “Don’t come crawling back when you’re done ‘finding’ yourself!”
Britney disappears while I stop at the door. My temper ignites, fanning the flames of my anger. Everything I’ve done up to this point, I’ve done for my friends.
Now I’m free from such constraining obligations.
I turn on my heels and storm back into Britney’s room.
Both girls look up in surprise.
“Gwen…” Britney whispers.
I lift my chin, jumping in with no preamble. “Danny and I are dating.”
Winnie gasps, eyes widening to take over half of her face. “What?”
“We like each other, and we’re going out. He’s off the market so try jumping someone else in the future.” My hair fans behind me as I spin and march out of the apartment.
Neither girl follows me.
I wipe away angry tears as I stride to my car. I’m annoyed that I’m crying like this. I don’t care what Britney or Winnie thinks of me. I’m just frustrated with myself for not putting my foot down a long time ago.
Once I climb inside the vehicle, I dial Danny. He answers on the second ring. “Hey, Gwen.”
I ignore his questioning tone. “I don’t want to hide our relationship anymore. Do you want to tell Aiden or should I?”
“Whoa, hold up a minute. Did something happen?”
I sniff and turn to face the apartment building. Square windows are lit up from the inside, throwing yellow light against the empty sidewalk. “I got into a fight with Winnie.”
“About what?”
“That doesn’t matter,” I snap. “I ended up telling both of them.”
He chuckles. “So much for ‘having me all to yourself’.”
“This isn’t funny.” But a smile plays on my lips despite my words.
“Do you want me to come up there?” Danny asks softly.
“You’d do that for me?”
“In a heartbeat.”
I melt into my seat. “As tempting as it is, I don’t want you driving up so late at night. I’ll just buy some ice cream at the convenience store and watch Netflix.”
“If you want to talk about it, I’m here.”
“Thanks.” I wipe the last of my tears. “Having a boyfriend is kinda nice.”
“Because you’re with me. I’m leagues above those other guys.”
I laugh. “Now I see why your ego’s so sensitive. It’s filled with air.”
“Oh, low blow.”
I snicker and rub my thumb on the back of the phone, imagining Danny’s face. “Good night, Danny.”
“Good night, Gwen.”
I hang up and drive to the store for my ice cream. The moment I return home, I toss my hair into a messy bun, slide on Danny’s hoodie and park in front of the television. I’m two-episodes into a new show when I hear a knock on the door.
I check my phone. It can’t be Danny. Or Britney. Or Win.
I tiptoe to the door and peek through the peephole. A familiar face catches my eye. I throw the door open, my jaw somewhere on the ground.
“Danny?”
“Hey.” He raises a plastic bag bearing the logo of my favorite restaurant. “Is there room on the couch for one more?”
I half-laugh, half-sob and throw my arms around his neck. “What are you doing here?”
“You were crying. I couldn’t stay home.”
That statement right there earns him a big, fat kiss.
18 Danny
There are several things I look forward to doing—kissing Gwen, talking to Gwen, texting Gwen. Let’s just say that most Gwen-related tasks make my day.
Telling Aiden about me and Gwen? Not so much.
I’ve been putting that off for the past week, but I can’t anymore. Tomorrow’s Friday. Gwen’s coming down to visit her parents. She’s also planning to stop by and hang with me.
Here at the house.
In front of Aiden.
Gwen volunteered to tell her brother about us, but I nixed the idea. If anybody should talk to Aiden, it’s me. I’ve been waiting all week for the best moment, but time’s run out. I have no choice but to go for it now.
“Dude.” Aiden snorts. “You realize you’ve been pacing for like five minutes straight now.”
I pause in the middle of the living room and stare at my best friend. His brown eyes, so much like Gwen’s, narrow in suspicion. I try not to look him straight on. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
“I gathered.” Aiden leans back in the chair and rests one leg over the other.
“You’ll probably be shocked, but I’m just gonna come right out and say it.”
“Go ahead.”
“I’ll understand if you’re mad, but just hear me out.”
Aiden laughs. “You like Gwen, don’t you?”
“I like Gwen,” I blurt and then pause when his words register. “Wait, you knew?”
“Of course.”
“Yeah, but… I never mentioned.”
“You didn’t have to. I saw it right away when you gave Gwen the keys to the Belmopan house.”
“So what? It’s just a house.”
“Dan, you treasure that place. Your parents wanted to rent it out, but you insisted they leave it as is. Suddenly, you offer the house up to my sister on a silver platter? I knew something was up.”
I stare at him, speechless.
Aiden arches an eyebrow. “You guys aren’t as slick as you think. I knew exactly when you fell for her.”
I wince. “You did?”
“Yup.”
Damn. He got me.
“Besides,” Aiden continues with a grin, “Gwen’s had a crush on you since she was like twelve. She thinks I don’t know, but I’m not an idiot. I just never brought it up in case it embarrassed her. She was already so awkward around you.”
“Did everyone know but me?” I yell.
He nods. “It got so bad, she didn’t want to come home when you were around. If you stopped by unannounced, she’d run through the back door.”
“No wonder I never saw her back then…”
“Yup.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I run a hand through my hair. If I’d known Aiden was cool, I wouldn’t have dragged my foot on this.
“Because liking someone doesn’t automatically mean you’re supposed to be together. Gwen didn’t know anything about you.” Aiden sets both feet on the ground and balances his elbows on his thighs. “You didn’t care about her either.”
“I did.”
“But not in the way Gwen would have liked.” He shrugs. “I figured it would be better to watch you two work it out on your own. And I wanted you to be cautious. Even if I approve, she’s still my little sister.”
“I’ll take care of her. I promise.”
“I believe you.” He nods. “I’m glad she’s with you and not some jerk who’ll just sleep with her and leave her hanging.” Aiden stares into the distance. I know he’s still beating himself up about Melissa and the pregnancy.
“Hey, man, you’re doing your best.”
“It’s hard, Dan. I think absentee fathers are scum, but there are days when I wish I could just run away from it all. I won’t, but that’s because of the way I was raised. If I went by the way I felt, it’d be a different story.”
“I thought you and Melissa were getting closer.”
“If by ‘closer’ you mean she tells me what she wants and I have to listen or she bursts into tears, then yeah. We’re practically glued together.”
“Is it that bad?”
“She’s so insecure. Last week, she saw me talking to one of my old friends from high school and she went ballistic. She was threatening to abort the baby and—” Aiden shudders. “I’m waiting for it to get better, but it’s getting worse and the kid hasn’t even been born yet.”
“If you talk to her—”
“You don’t get it, do you?” Aiden’s eyes bore into mine. “I’m stuck with this woman for life. No matter what happens, she’ll always be around because of one mistake.”
I don’t know what to say to that so I keep my mouth shut.
Aiden massages his temples. “Anyway, that’s my headache. What are you going to do about yours?”
“Are you talking about Gwen?” I ask, getting ready to fight him on that.
“Richie’s into her too, right?”
My jaw drops.
Aiden smirks. “I’m more observant than you think. Especially when it involves my family. Richie couldn’t take his eyes off Gwen that day we helped her move in. If it’s any consolation, you hid your interest better than he did. I still knew, of course, but it counts for something.”
My fingers clench when I think of my cousin. Now that Gwen and I are dating, I should feel relieved, but I’m still uneasy.
“Richie’s getting married on Saturday. Even if he likes Gwen, he’s not crazy enough to do anything about it.”
“I guess you’re right. No one rebels in your family.”
“We rebel.” I correct him. “We just don’t let them find out. Richie’s got too many eyes on him. He’ll behave.”
“What about you? Will you introduce Gwen to the family?”
“I don’t know.” I bite on my lip in thought.
I’m sure Gwen expects me to invite her to the wedding. She’s been dropping hints about it all week, but I pretend not to understand them.
My mother’s words last weekend shook me back to a reality I don’t want to embrace.
Mom insisted she’ll never accept a girlfriend of another race. She made her point with Gwen’s name.
Bringing Gwen to the wedding is a bad idea.
“Oy.” Aiden lumbers to his feet and slaps my back. “Good luck with that, my friend.”
“Thanks.”
I’m going to need it.
* * *
On Friday afternoon, I prepare to leave work early so I can meet Gwen at the bus station. She left her car in Belmopan because I’ll drive her back when the weekend is over.
As I’m rifling through my research on the Belmopan store, Emily knocks on the door and walks in. Her ponytail swings behind her and every step of her heels is punctuated by a ‘click’.
“Danny, there’s a girl here to see you.” Curiosity shines from my sister’s eyes.
Confusion gleams from mine. “Who?”
“She says her name is Winnie.” Emily leans closer. “Is she a… friend of yours?”
>
“Not in any sense of the word.” I stuff my documents into a folder and zip it up.
“Should I ask the secretary to send her away?”
“No.” I pause and then shake my head. “Just let her in.”
“Alright.” Emily walks out slowly, like she’s waiting for me to call her back and explain.
I don’t.
A moment after she closes the door, it bursts open and Winnie strides inside. She looks ready for the beach in a tank top, shorts and sandals. The outfit would make sense if we weren’t in the middle of the city and at least five miles from the Caribbean Sea.
“So this is where you work,” she says, gazing at my office.
I observe the room with her. It’s nothing fancy. The ceilings are exposed and metal beams crisscross in the open space. The walls are wooden and so light I can hear when Emily is screaming at her husband to pick up their kids or else.
I didn’t bother decorating. My parents assigned me to the warehouse as soon as I returned from Jamaica. I never had the time.
“You can sit.” I swipe a hand over my tie and sink into my chair.
“I prefer to stand.” Winnie crosses her lean, glossy black legs and twines her fingers.
I stare at the shapes she creates with her hands. Is that a gang sign?
“Danny, I came to apologize.”
My head whips up. We’ve had a whopping total of two encounters, but several of them involved actions worth apologizing for. She’ll have to be more specific.
“That night at the party, I was out of my mind. I hope you don’t hold what happened against me.”
“It’s already forgotten.”
Winnie nods.
I peer at her thoughtful expression. “Is that all?”
Her gaze veers to the right. “I heard you were dating Gwen.” She coughs. “Is that true?”
I lean back and study her shifting eyes.
“Is that a yes or a no?” Winnie raises her chin. When I maintain my silence, she frowns. “I spent all morning calling every store your family owns and asking for you. I drove all the way here. The least you can do is answer me.”
“What do you want Winnie? You already know what I’m going to say.”
She squeezes her eyes shut like I stabbed her. “So it is true.”
My patience with this conversation has officially run out. I rise and finish clearing my desk. “I’m sorry you wasted your time and energy trying to find me. Please get back to Belmopan safely.”
