River's Edge

by Terri Blackstock

  “When he finds Lisa, you’ll change your opinion,” Jonathan said. “Meanwhile, I’m calling off the debate.”

  Ben threw up his hands. “I don’t care.”

  Jonathan looked at Morgan, and she knew he realized the urgency of the situation. This was no publicity hoax.

  Ben Jackson was scared to death.

  CHAPTER 5

  Blair Owens’s morning walk always provided the last bits of peace in her day, before she started chasing down stories for the newspaper that came out three times a week. The newspaper business was new to her. For the past several years she had worked as a librarian, and only bought the paper a month ago. While she was widely known as a research whiz who could chase down facts like a greyhound after a rabbit, being a librarian had suited her specific paranoias. The burn scars that covered the right side of her face made her uncomfortable in public, but when she’d bought the paper, she’d been forced outside her walls. It took some getting used to, but she was finding that her new duties suited her personality even better.

  She trudged through the sand and grass on the river side of the island to Cricket’s, the little hole-in-the-wall diner on the dock where she had breakfast each morning. Often her walk had a payoff at the end, when she found Cade sitting at the counter, sipping his coffee as if waiting for her to come in.

  She hoped he would be there today. It had been a month since that first kiss between them, and ever since she’d walked around with butterflies in her stomach, wondering if it had meant as much to him as it had to her. Though he’d been spending a lot more time with her since then, she didn’t want to assume anything. Word had gotten around that she and Cade were a couple, and people on the island were beginning to treat them as one. But in truth, she wasn’t sure what they were. They had never expressed their feelings in words, but Cade’s treatment of her had changed from intense friendship to flirtation. Not having that much experience with that type of relationship, she found herself feeling like a bumbling kid who had a crush on someone out of her league.

  She got to the screen door of the small diner and pushed inside. Cade sat at the counter, wearing his khaki uniform. He swiveled on his stool at the sound of the door and smiled at her. She couldn’t explain the thrill that went through her.

  “Hey there,” she said in a voice that she hoped sounded friendly and cool. She fought the urge to lean over and kiss him, to touch his freshly shaven jaw or run her finger over his ear.

  “I was hoping you’d come in before I had to leave.”

  “Where you going?”

  “Work.” He turned back to the counter as she sat down. “Colonel, get Blair a cup of coffee, will you?”

  She studied Cade as the Colonel got her a cup. He looked as if he hadn’t gotten much sleep last night. Had the pain kept him awake? She’d seen the struggle he encountered going from crutches to that cane, forcing himself to walk on the surgically repaired fractures, his bones held together only by the steel rods the surgeons had inserted. “You look tired.”

  “Yeah, I didn’t get much sleep last night.” He sipped his coffee. “Been working on a missing person case.”

  “Who’s missing?”

  “Lisa Jackson,” the colonel said over the bar.

  Blair looked up and caught her breath. “Ben Jackson’s wife? She’s missing?”

  Cade sipped his coffee and nodded. “Yeah. It’s pretty much common knowledge now, since we’ve been questioning people all over the island.”

  “Ben too,” the proprietor said. “He was in here drilling everybody who came in last night. I’m thinking they probably had a fight and she ran off for the night. She’ll turn up this morning, and they’ll get it all worked out, I reckon. They have to. Neither one of them would want to jeopardize the mayoral debate.”

  Blair took her coffee and turned back to Cade. “How long’s she been missing?”

  “Not quite twenty-four hours, best we can tell. But I didn’t see any point in waiting after Ben reported it. If she shows up today, so much the better.”

  She thought that over as she took a sip. “The stress of this debate probably got their tempers flaring. Ben can’t be easy to live with right now.”

  “He’s convinced something happened to her.”

  “Well, we both know that Ben’s usually wrong. Does make for a more interesting story about the debate, though. I was picturing a big front-page article with a bunch of sound bites from their dogfight this morning, but now I can talk about missing wives and the stress this has put on the families. Heaven knows, it’s been stressful for mine. Morgan has been so tense you can hardly talk to her. You’d think Jonathan’s been in politics for years.”

  “Don’t exploit it, Blair. There’s not a story there yet.”

  Blair tried not to look insulted. “Me? Hey, I just report the truth. You know I don’t embellish.”

  “Every journalist embellishes, and your imagination is right up there with the best of them.”

  “You know I’m fair.” At least, she hoped he knew. Before, when she had lived by her own set of rules, she might have exaggerated for the sake of subscriptions. But her life had changed. Just weeks ago, she had given her life to Christ, and everything had changed. Now, even in her work, she tried to live by the biblical principles of honesty and love. It wasn’t always easy—sometimes she just didn’t get it—but God was teaching her.

  Cade slipped off the stool and got his cane. “I’ve got to go.”

  She tried to hide her disappointment. “You don’t have time to eat?”

  “I had a bowl of cereal at home.” His voice dropped to a deep bass as he leaned in close to her ear. “I just came to see you.”

  She smiled up at him, knowing that her feelings flashed like neon through the transparency of her eyes. He grinned as he limped out the door, letting the screen door bounce behind him.

  When she turned back, she saw the Colonel grinning at her. “What?”

  He started to chuckle. “You’ve got it as bad as he does.”

  Laughing softly, she brought the cup to her lips and hid behind it, hoping the Colonel hadn’t read Cade wrong.

  CHAPTER 6

  There was bad blood between Cade and Ben Jackson, but Cade knew he had to put it out of his mind during the course of this case. He couldn’t dwell on rumors and stretched truths, on Ben’s unfounded criticism of his department and Ben’s promises to fire Cade if he was elected. If anything, Cade had overcompensated on Lisa’s case to prove he wasn’t holding anything against him. Most departments wouldn’t even start a search until she’d been missing twenty-four hours, but Cade had a special interest in missing persons since he had so recently been one himself. It didn’t matter that Lisa’s husband was out to destroy him.

  Cade knew Ben would have called him if he’d heard from Lisa, but he decided to go by his house after leaving Cricket’s, just to update him on the search. He found Morgan and Jonathan there, and while it surprised him that Ben would have let Jonathan into his house, he was glad the man wasn’t alone. Morgan was known as one of the chief comforters on the island—one of the first to show up after any tragedy with a casserole and a hug.

  Jonathan, who had grown more compassionate since becoming a pastor, would have a harder time comforting his political rival. But Cade knew his buddy was up to the task.

  Ben looked even worse than he had last night. His eyes had a wild fear about them and his hands trembled, but he seemed grateful when he learned just how much the police department had already done to find Lisa.

  He rubbed his stubbled jaw and looked up at Cade with misty eyes. “Listen, about all the stuff I’ve said about you during this campaign—”

  “Don’t worry about it, Ben. None of that matters. I’m just here to do my job.”

  Ben looked more humble than Cade had ever seen him. “I’m just saying that if I’d known I was going to need you like this, I sure would have been a little more careful what I said.”

  Morgan patted his shoulder. “Ca
de’s not the type to hold grudges. You’ll find her, won’t you, Cade?”

  “We’re giving it everything we’ve got. But I need to go over some more things with you, Ben.”

  Ben nodded, as if anxious to cooperate. “Of course. Anything.”

  Jonathan got up. “Look, we’ll be leaving now so you guys can talk.” He reached out to shake Ben’s hand. “Let us know if you need anything, okay?”

  Morgan gave Ben a hug. “Please, if she turns up, would you call us? We’re going to get everybody to pray.”

  Ben rubbed his face. “I appreciate that.”

  “And we’re not going to be debating without you,” Jonathan said. “I’m calling it off.”

  “You don’t have to do that. Sam will revolt.”

  “Of course I’m gonna do it. This is serious. He’ll get over it.”

  Ben couldn’t have looked less interested. He just fixed his eyes on Cade, clearly ready to begin. Cade got the feeling that the mayoral race was the farthest thing from Ben’s mind.

  CHAPTER 7

  Morgan was quiet as they drove home.

  “You okay, babe?” Jonathan asked.

  She leaned her head back on the headrest. “Yeah.”

  “You were thinking about the baby, weren’t you?”

  She closed her eyes, hoping they’d look less haunted. “I was actually wondering if God still answers my prayers. Will he hear my prayers for Lisa, when he didn’t hear my prayers for the baby?”

  Silence fell between them. She was glad he didn’t spout out some pat answer about how God heard but had a different plan. Even if it was true, she didn’t want to hear it right now.

  “Is it ever going to happen, Jonathan?”

  “Of course it is.” His voice sounded as weak and uncertain as hers.

  She leaned her head against the window. “I’m not so sure. It took so long to get pregnant, and now this. There’s got to be something wrong.” She looked back at him. “Jonathan, I think it’s time for us to make an appointment at the fertility clinic.”

  He pulled into the driveway and cut off the engine but made no effort to get out of the car. “Don’t you think it’s too soon? It’s only been a little over a year.”

  “If it’s too soon, they’ll tell us. Meanwhile, I just want some tests. I want to know if there’s something wrong that can be fixed before much more time passes.”

  “You’ve got plenty of time left on your biological clock, Morgan. You’re only twenty-nine.”

  “But I want a big family, and I don’t understand why I can’t get pregnant when teenagers do after one indiscretion. I need to know what’s wrong with me.”

  He looked out the window for a long moment, staring at the wax myrtles along the driveway, their branches reaching up to the sky. Blair’s car sat in the driveway. Was Sadie filling her in on the miscarriage? She hoped not.

  “It could be me, honey.” His words came out raspy, uncertain.

  She shook her head. “You know that’s not true. I was pregnant. I’m the one who lost the baby.”

  “But the bottom line is, something’s going wrong with us. And if you feel like you need to go to the fertility clinic, I’m with you.”

  She had expected a fight. “Are you sure, Jonathan?”

  “Of course I’m sure. Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “All the reasons you’ve said before. It seems like once we start on this cycle, it’s hard to stop.”

  “It’s worth a try, baby. Just one appointment. We can find out what our options are. Then we can decide if we want to go on.” He squeezed her hand. “That okay?”

  She wished the decision had made her feel better. It was simply a step, not the cure. “Yeah.” She looked up at the porch. Her big ferns spilled over their hanging pots, cascading almost to the floor, in need of water. She suddenly felt too tired to tend to them. “Guess it’s time to tell my sister what happened yesterday.”

  Jonathan looked as though he dreaded that as much as she did.

  They went in and found Blair in the kitchen with Sadie and Caleb. The baby was in his high chair, shoving dry Cheerios into his mouth as he banged his spoon on the tray.

  Blair was munching on a carrot and glanced at the Braves T-shirt Jonathan wore. “You’re not wearing that to the debate, are you? Don’t you realize this is the most important day of your political life, Jonathan?”

  He headed for the phone. “There’s not going to be a debate today, Blair.”

  She caught her breath and looked at her sister. “Because of Lisa Jackson?”

  Morgan nodded. “How did you know?”

  “I heard about it at Cricket’s. Sadie said you’d gone over there. Is this for real?”

  Morgan went to the coffee pot. It was still warm, so she poured a cup. “She’s still missing. Ben’s crazy with worry.”

  “You’re sure it’s not just some trumped up attempt to get attention?”

  “Yes,” Morgan said. “If you’d seen him, you wouldn’t even ask. Besides, Lisa’s not a publicity hound. She wouldn’t have gone along with a scheme like that.”

  “She would if he tied her up and locked her in a room.”

  Morgan turned back to her sister and shot her a withering look. “That’s not funny, Blair.”

  Blair looked as if she’d been unfairly judged. “Hey, I’m just saying people will do strange things for politics.”

  “This is not political,” Morgan said.

  Jonathan got off the phone and came out of the office. “Well, there’s no way to completely call this off without going to the rally and making an announcement there. We’re going to delay it a week, possibly two, depending on the availability of the Pier.”

  “Darn.” Blair threw down her carrot. “I really hate that. I was all set for you to pull ahead in the race today.” She looked at Sadie, who sat next to Caleb and was staring at Morgan as if she expected her to burst into tears. “Sadie, I guess you and I can chase down the Lisa story today. See if we can find out anything.”

  Sadie had worked briefly for the previous owner of the paper, so Blair had hired her to help out after school and on weekends. She had proved to be a valuable employee. But Sadie looked as if something was troubling her.

  “I was thinking…since the rally’s off, do you think I could go to Atlanta and see my mom? I haven’t seen her in about a month. We’ve been so busy, and she doesn’t get that many visitors. It always cheers her up when I come.”

  Blair shrugged. “I can do without you. The paper doesn’t even come out until Tuesday. I’m sure I can cover everything by myself today.”

  Morgan smiled at the girl. “You can take my car, honey. Give her a kiss from Caleb.”

  A grin broke out on Sadie’s face, and Morgan realized how much the teen still missed her mother. Saturdays were the only days that Sadie could go visit. The fact that it was a six-hour round-trip made it prohibitive on any other day.

  “Before you leave, Sadie, I need to talk to Blair upstairs. Can you watch Caleb for a few minutes?”

  Sadie gave her a knowing look. “Sure. Come on, Caleb. Come with me while I get ready to go see Mommy.” Caleb toddled off, holding Sadie’s hand.

  Blair got up and studied Morgan’s face. “Everything okay?”

  “Let’s go talk.” Morgan was quiet as she led her sister up the stairs. She could hear Karen—one of the home’s residents—changing her baby’s diaper in her room, talking to the seven-week-old infant in a soft, sweet voice. She had turned out to be a devoted mother to Emory—not something Morgan would have expected from a former crack addict.

  Morgan led Blair into their parents’ old room. Though they had died months ago, Morgan had left their room just as it was. The scents in the pillows and the curtains had long ago faded, but the room still filled them both with comfort when the grief got a foothold.

  Morgan sank onto the bed.

  “Sis, are you all right?” Blair whispered.

  Morgan pressed the corners of her eyes, trying hard not t
o cry. “I had a miscarriage yesterday.”

  It took a moment for the words to hit full force. “A miscarriage? You were pregnant?”

  “I’d only found out the day before. We were going to announce it yesterday.”

  “Oh, honey.” Blair sat down on the bed next to her and pulled her into her arms. “I am so sorry.”

  Morgan laid her head on Blair’s shoulder. “I tried to call you several times yesterday, but I never got you.”

  “Why didn’t you leave a message? I would have called back.”

  “I don’t know. I guess I couldn’t decide whether I really wanted to talk or not. Oh, Blair, I really wanted to be pregnant.”

  “I know you did.” Blair grabbed a Kleenex box from the nightstand and handed one to Morgan, then wadded one up for herself. “I don’t even know what to say.”

  “There’s nothing to say. It just is.”

  “At least you know you can get pregnant now.”

  Morgan wished Blair hadn’t said that. “What good is it to be able to fertilize an egg and have it implant into your uterus if you can’t make it hold on? Lisa’s had four miscarriages. She’s been trying for thirteen years. What if I’m going to be like that?”

  “You’re not, okay? It’s nothing like that.”

  Morgan blew her nose. “I don’t know, Blair. I have a bad feeling.”

  “Well, don’t.” Her voice held a determined certainty. “You’re perfectly fine.”

  “I miss Mama.” Morgan’s voice broke off, and Blair pulled her back into her arms and let go of her own emotions. “I miss her so much.”

  “Me too,” Blair whispered. “She would know what to say. She wouldn’t spout off like I do, without a thought.”

  “Words aren’t the answer,” Morgan told her. “But she would pray. Mama was the world’s best prayer warrior.”

  “Now, that I can do,” Blair whispered.

  CHAPTER 8