West (A Darkness Series Novel)

by Stacey Marie Brown

  Reality came streaming into the room so fast it spun my head. It was surreal. I was still deep inside Rez, and her muscles clasped in orgasm around me at the same time as her man called for his update. He probably never imagined someone would consider screwing his woman. His ego was too vast, his power too unequivocal.

  Rez jerked, going up on her elbows, staring at the phone like it was a deadly snake. Not far from the truth.

  I slid out of her. A wave of shame, anger, and sadness pummeled me. With one call our little bubble blew up. There was no need to say we could never do this again. It was clear. She swiftly dropped her legs, covering herself with my gray hoodie she was still wearing, her gaze on the floor.

  Neither of us moved to pick up the call. I was excellent at lying, pretending all was good when it wasn’t. But right here, standing naked, Rez all over me… I wasn’t that good. Lars was too perceptive to not sense something even over airwaves. He wasn’t the high demon king for nothing. Eventually the buzzing stopped. The silence filled the room with awkward tension.

  I ran my hand through my hair; the feel of it flopping back in my eyes annoyed me. Everything pissed me off all of a sudden. “I’m gonna jump in the shower. We need to plan for tonight to find the spear and get the hell out of here.” And most importantly, far, far away from each other. Not saying it made the inevitable moment hang heavier in the room.

  Rez nodded, her eyes still on the ground by the window. I glanced over my shoulder as I moved to the bathroom. The rays streaming through the splintered window reflected rainbows all over the room and covered her body. My muscles trembled with the agony of turning away from her. The beast demanded I return, but for once I had to override him. Logic had to win out over primal reactions.

  I didn’t do grief or sadness well. Dark Dwellers weren’t built that way. We always turned to anger. I slammed the bathroom door so hard it shook the cottage. Huffing, I leaned over the sink. I had let my hair grow long, to my shoulders, but now I picked up my razor and turned it on. Eli shaved his head when he lost Ember. Three years he thought his mate was dead. I was understanding my brother more every second. Rez was not dead, but she was lost to me just the same.

  I knew my life was on a timer now. Even if a miracle happened and Lars didn’t find out what had passed between us, it would kill me to know she was sleeping with him every night. To come to the house and pretend she was nothing more than Lars’s secretary would be impossible. I could only keep the beast behaving so long.

  The last of my dark blond locks fell into the sink. My head and face held a shadow of scruff, drawing more attention to my eyes, which looked cold and ferocious. All I wanted was to shift into the beast and forget everything. Run, fight, have sex with other women till I forgot. Blistering rage shot through me, my arm slammed into the mirror. Similar to the cracked window in the main room, the mirror fractured into a thousand small pieces, crumbling into the sink as I hit it again. Blood covered my knuckles and smeared across the glass.

  Morweena was right. If I couldn’t become a beast, I was lost. I was merely a weak, pathetic man who fell for someone I couldn’t have.

  Everything in my past, all the relationships that had gone to hell—my mother, father, Cammie, Aneira—caught up to the present. They all came crashing over me at once. A roar tore through my throat. Anything that was not built into the foundation I tore free and smashed into chunks against the walls. I ripped the bathroom apart, as if it were my prey. Time seemed irrelevant. Blood trickled down my hands and arms as I demolished the space. The beast bashed and banged against its cage, and pain ripped through my veins as I tried to shift.

  A scream bellowed from me as I pushed against the invisible barrier with everything I had. My eyes watered, veins and muscles straining. For one brief moment a large paw, daggered with claws, protruded from my hand. I squeezed my lids together, trying to hold the shape, but my body gave out, and I fell to the floor with a pained cry.

  “West!” I heard Rez scream over and over again until she finally broke through the door. I lifted my lids but didn’t turn to look at her. “Dammit...West.” She collapsed next to me on the stone floor. She was still wearing my hoodie, smelling of me. Of sex. My lips pursed in a grim line.

  “You need to stop doing that,” I growled.

  “What?”

  “Wearing my clothes.” My nostrils flared.

  “Sorry. I didn’t have time to pick out an outfit before you decided to destroy our bathroom,” she snapped, then grabbed my bloody hand with hers. “Gods, West, you pulverized your hands.”

  “I’ll heal.” I shrugged.

  “Don’t move.” She stood and stepped out of the room. I hadn’t planned on moving. Pain, both emotional and physical, drained me. My lids drifted closed until I sensed her back in the room, sitting next to me. The smell of rubbing alcohol tickled my nose. My eyes went wide with the first stinging dose of antiseptic.

  “I swear, I leave you alone for five minutes and you demolish the room, shave your head, and turn yourself into minced meat.” She kneeled over me, my hand in hers as she cleaned it. “I once had a Siberian husky that did the same thing when I left her alone too long.”

  “You had a dog?” I tilted my head to look at her.

  “That’s what you picked up from what I said?” She guffawed. “Yes, I used to have a dog. I love animals. Lars isn’t fond of them, so I couldn’t get one. I miss having a dog. She was so sweet. No matter how bad I felt, she always made me feel better.”

  “Never had a pet.” I let my head roll forward again. “Didn’t really need one. I am one.”

  Rez snickered. “Yeah, you guys make the best family pets. So cuddly and sweet. Great with kids.”

  “Hey. We are good with kids,” I grumbled, a flash of Jared as a baby, him only a few months old, curled around my front paw, stroking my fur and babbling like I understood. I would have destroyed anything to keep him safe. “We’re extremely protective.”

  “I don’t doubt that.” She met my eyes. “I’ll bet you’d be an even better father.”

  My body went rigid. Her gaze went to my hand, her head shaking. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that.”

  “What? I wouldn’t be a fantastic dad?” I quipped back.

  “No. Just…” Red colored her cheeks. She paused and grabbed my other hand, inspecting it. She was doing a good job pretending I wasn’t still naked.

  “We can’t do this anymore,” I said softly.

  “I know.” She nodded. Her expression struggled to stay impassive.

  “Hey.” I grabbed her chin with my free hand, lifting her face to look at me. “If it was anybody else, darlin’, I would fight. I would kill anything and anyone in our way.”

  I held her chin, but she dropped her gaze. “Why does it make me feel worse?”

  “Tell me about it.”

  “West.” Her gaze lifted back up. “I never imagined this… you… I wasn’t looking. I wanted for nothing. I have a great life. Happy. A family and they need me.”

  “That’s why—”

  “Let me finish,” she demanded.

  “Yes, ma’am.” I grinned, dropping my arm.

  She smiled back, but a sadness reflected in her eyes. “You messed everything up. I feel torn in two now, between what I should do and what I want. I never wanted more than my life there. Now you’ve changed everything. How can I go back and pretend? Be happy in my old existence? I will be a shell, knowing I have had a taste of something exceptional. I won’t be able to see you walk into the house pretending we are barely friends, and I won’t be able to fight the need to see you. It will be torture either way.”

  “Well, sweetheart, either Lars will kill me or the creature will tonight. Problem solved.”

  She dug her nail into my cut knuckles.

  “Ow, evil woman.”

  “Not funny.”

  “Come on, it’s a little funny.” I nudged her.

  “Why, because it might be true?” She glowered at me.

  “Th
ere is no ‘might.’” I tipped my head against hers. “There’s no way Lars won’t find out.”

  She tipped back, staring. “Why?”

  I wasn’t about to tell her my beast set up camp when it roamed between her thighs, positioning a huge neon arrow that proclaimed: West claimed this one...move along. Nothing to see here. It would do no good.

  “He’s a smart man, darlin’. He will sense it. Also, when he touches you, I’m not sure I could sit back and be the obedient pet.”

  “That’s the last thing I would ever want you to be,” she whispered, dropping my hands. She unfolded her legs and sat against the wall, her shoulder brushing mine. “We really are in a mess.”

  Oh, we were beyond that. I don’t think she completely understood the severity of it. She must still hope we could tuck it away without Lars ever noticing. I didn’t want her to know the truth. She couldn’t do anything about it anyway.

  “Speaking of mess, you really obliterated this bathroom, didn’t you?” She waggled her head, taking in the bare walls, splintered mirror, broken cupboards, and knickknacks on the ground.

  “I think we might lose our deposit.”

  She sniggered, tapping her shoulder against mine, her gaze scouring my head. “I like it.” She nodded at my absent hair. “Very tough, Mr. Moseley.”

  “Thank you, Ms. Mareza.”

  She jabbed her finger into my side.

  “Damn.” I jerked with a laugh. “You really hate that name.”

  “Yes.” She turned to me and drooped her head on my shoulder. “But it’s not so bad when you say it.”

  “Really?”

  “That doesn’t mean you can keep using it. But I will forgive you…and not shave your eyebrows as you sleep.”

  “No, not my eyebrows.” I wiggled them. “They’re the only thing that brings in the ladies.”

  She tipped her head back so she could see me. “It’s definitely not the only thing.”

  “You shave that and we are having words, darlin’.”

  She grinned, and her eyes lit up. She looked…happy. It was the most beautiful I had ever seen her. And it killed me.

  I was on a slippery slope. But my future was pretty much over and not for one moment, staring down at her, did I regret a second of it.

  Hell, West, you’re going to die anyway. You might as well jump.

  The rain and wind lashed brutally down on us, punishing any exposed skin. The windows of the lone cottage glowed with buttery light, and smoke curled out of the chimney. I hopped over the thigh-high stone fence, taking Rez’s hand to help her. She trembled with cold under my grasp, her jacket and pants saturated. Keeping my fingers twisted with hers, I hustled up the hill to the door.

  The sun had only lasted till lunch before another gale swept over the land, the temperature dipping low, and rain saturated the already sodden dirt. It was growing dark when we reached Olwyn’s cottage. The only thing that kept us moving through the mucky hills was hope Olwyn would know of some old Druid roaming around these parts. Our options were thin; we needed help.

  I rapped against the door and tucked Rez close to me to keep her warm. No sound of movement came from inside, but I could smell life in there.

  “Fionna?” I hit the door again. “Olwyn?”

  Nothing. Rez and I exchanged glances.

  “I know you’re there. Please, open up.” I beat my fists against the wood, rattling the door.

  Not a thing stirred. A warning nipped at my neck. I took a deep breath. The smell of oils, herbs, spices, dense magic, and old animal blood filled my nose. It covered the scent of whomever was inside, my ears picking up only one heartbeat.

  “Olwyn?” I rammed my shoulder against the entry. I couldn’t stop the rise of apprehension. It tapped the base of my neck. I took a step back and kicked my foot at the door. It took two more tries before the old latch broke free, the door bursting open and crashing against the wall.

  Rez and I stepped in. Only the fireplace gave off dim light, laying heavy shadows over the room from the table pilled with pots, books, and potions.

  “Fionna?” I called out again, my eyes moving slowly over the space. A creak of wood shot my gaze to the hearth. Low flames consumed the tiny chunks of wood left.

  Olwyn sat in the rocker. Her eyes focused on the fire as she rocked back and forth in a slow rhythm. She didn’t notice our intrusion, her eyes void, her face slack. Something was very wrong. She even smelled different.

  “Olwyn?” I walked up cautiously. She continued to stare at the embers like I wasn’t there. “Hey.” I touched her shoulder.

  With a snap, her head turned to me, her eyes glazed. “Who are you?”

  “West. I came here a couple of days ago?”

  Rez moved around to her other side; Olwyn’s gaze slowly tracked her.

  “I don’t know you.” She stared blankly.

  “My name is Rez. I am a friend of West’s.”

  “I don’t know either of you. Why are you in my house?”

  “Olwyn, where is Fionna?” I bent over and placed my hand on her arm.

  Her mouth opened to speak then shut, her lips smacking together a few times as she frowned at us.

  “I-I-I don’t know a Fionna…should I?”

  “Fionna, the girl who was living here with you. I sat at the table two nights ago, drinking tea. I asked for a locator spell.” I motioned back to the table.

  “Tea...spell…” Olwyn blinked and stared off past me, lost in her thoughts again.

  “Olwyn?” I could feel irritation crawling up my throat.

  Rez stepped in front of me, placing her hands on top of the woman’s. “What happened to Fionna, Olwyn?”

  “Fionna.” Olwyn said her name with familiarity, a soft smile. Then it dropped, her head tilted. “I don’t know any Fionna.”

  “Damnit.” I turned away, rubbing my hand over my shaved head. What if those men followed my car and kidnapped Fionna, thinking she was with us?

  “I think she’s been spelled to forget.” Rez leaned into Olwyn, staring deep in her eyes.

  “What?” I moved around her to see Olwyn. She looked stoned. I took in a deep breath, letting her smell drift over my tongue. My lids popped open. “Holy shit.” I could taste the intense magic covering her, but it was not her magic. The strong energy pounding off her a few nights ago was gone. Olwyn was barely a witch by magical standards. Not even close to the force I experienced here before.

  “What?” Rez tensed, standing to her full height.

  “She hardly has any magic, almost none... Either it was all a front or someone took it. Someone powerful enough…” Fear coursed up my spine. “Look at me, Olwyn.” I got in the old lady’s face. “Where is Fionna? Did someone take her?”

  Olwyn stared at me, emptiness behind her expression.

  “Goddammit!” I stomped my foot onto the wood floor, leaning over her chair, my hands gripping the rocking chair, shaking it slightly. “Wake up, Olwyn! Tell me where they took Fionna!”

  “West, stop. It’s no use.” Rez pulled me back, my muscles stiff to move.

  “Those men took her, I just know it.” I gritted through my teeth.

  Rez bit down on her lip and looked back at the old woman. I followed her gaze. Olwyn stared at the flames, rocking, empty again. She couldn’t help us. Not only did I have to deal with a brought-back-to-life demon, but a missing Fionna as well. If anything happened to her it would be all my fault. Another woman to get hurt because of me.

  Unfortunately, Fionna’s absence would have to wait, time was ticking down on our chance to obtain the spear, and we needed to go now.

  “What do we do?” Rez grabbed a blanket off the bed in the corner and covered the old woman.

  “The only thing we can. We go for Balor.”

  “How do we do that?” Rez moved to me, her face twisted with worry.

  “We kill him.”

  Rez’s eyes went wide. “Don’t you recall last night?”

  “Tonight we purposely go for h
is third eye. It’s the source of his power and his weakness.”

  “Oh yeah. Easy as that.”

  I stared deep into her eyes. “Nothing worth getting is ever easy, sweetheart.”

  The beast was the first to rub along my ribs, pricking at my instincts as Rez and I neared the beginning of the trail atop the cliffs. Below lay the small section of beach where we left the diving gear. The trail down to the coast was steep, dangerous, and off limits. I glanced at the woman next to me. None of those have ever stopped me before.

  The moonless night made it hard to see anything far out. Even though my senses weren’t top notch anymore, they still were better than most fae. I took in deep breaths, trying to taste what my gut was warning me about.

  Magic. A fuck-load of it.

  I grabbed Rez’s wrist, stopping her in place.

  “What?” Her voice spiked with anxiety.

  “There’s something ahead. Very powerful,” I whispered, my head swiveling around, trying to see through the darkness. Tasting the dense air on my tongue, I found it heavier and braided differently than fae’s.

  Druid magic.

  My back stiffened as I noticed a hooded outline a few yards away.

  Rez gripped my elbow, and her eyes also locked on the figure.

  The petite shape moved forward, hands clutching the hood and pulling the cloak back.

  I inhaled sharply.

  Holy. Shit.

  “Fionna.” My head swam, trying to clear the confusion, but my gut understood immediately.

  She grinned smugly. The shy girl I met in the cabin was absent. The power and confidence thumping off her doused the air.

  I couldn’t believe I had been so blind.

  “You aren’t a witch at all, are you?” It was less a question and more a statement.

  “No.” Her voice was strong and fluid. “I am far more than that.”

  “You’re a fuckin’ Druid.” I curled my hands into fists. “How could I not see that? Sense it?”

  “Because I didn’t want you to,” she stated, taking a step closer.