by Kenna Gordon
“First you make me feel something for you, and then you tell me it’s a mistake. I don't think you have the right to ask who I’m going to sleep with,” she spat the words at Myles as she threw back the sheet and abruptly sat the empty glass down on the nightstand. Katelin quickly gathered her jeans and blouse from the chair in the corner, and sat down to dress. “And no, I wasn’t planning to go home with Cameron or his friend,” Kate continued, as she zipped the jeans and threw on the rumpled blouse. “You were right Myles, sleeping together was a mistake!” she exclaimed as she stood, picked up her shoes, and stormed out of his room.
“Katie!... Wait!” Stunned, Myles called out to Katelin as he jumped up and ran after her.
By this time, she was already out the front door, and up the stairs to the apartment above the garage.
“Katie, please wait!”
Entering the apartment she slammed the door and slid to the floor. Katelin buried her face in her hands and began to cry.
Myles took the stairs two at a time, reaching the top he pounded on the door, and shouted, “Katie, let me in... Katie, please...talk to me...please Katie.”
Frustrated when there was no response, Myles sat down on the top step and lowered his head. He recalled the conversation he and Kate had the morning after their love making. Myles remembered telling her that what they had done was a mistake, but he didn’t realize that Katelin would take those two little words, a mistake, and conclude that their night together meant nothing to him. Suddenly everything seemed very clear to Myles. If Katelin only knew how he really felt. If she only knew how much he loved her, none of this would have happened.
Joanna's strawberry blond hair fell softly around her face; her pale green eyes sparkled as she stood in front of the full length mirror adjusting her dress and recalling the day James had asked her to marry him. She was reluctant at first; it had been almost twenty years since that terrible day when she received the news of her husband’s death. While it was hard for her to imagine being married to anyone other than Michael Kinkaid, James made her think that even at fifty-seven she could have a new life, with a new love, and that excited her.
“How are you doing?” Katelin asked Joanna as she entered the room.
“Look at you, such a beautiful young lady,” Joanna said touching Kate's cheek.
Memories of Katelin’s first violin lesson, the night Nick took her to prom, and the day she received her acceptance letter from Julliard made Joanna smile. Kate was like the daughter she never had, and their relationship had only deepened with the absence of Katelin’s mother, Kathleen.
“How’s your father?” She asked.
“He’s nervous, you’d think this was his first wedding,” Kate said.
“You know I would never try to replace you mother,” Joanna reassured her.
“I know; mom would want dad to be happy—you make him happy, so I know she would be pleased that the two of you are getting married.”
“Thank you for that, now I am going downstairs to check on the floral arrangements before I start to cry, and my mascara runs.”
“Okay, but no secret rendezvous with groom,” Kate laughed.
Soon after Joanna left to ensure that things were moving along as planned, Kate heard a knock on the bedroom door.
“Mom, can I come in?” Myles asked.
Katelin opened the door, the vision of her loveliness left Myles speechless for a moment. She was wearing a strapless lavender cocktail dress that accented her slim waist. Her auburn hair had been swept up on top of her head, with the exception of a few wispy curls that fell down her slender neck. She looked like a piece of fine china that was to be appreciated and not touched.
“Katie!” Myles stopped to regain his composure, and continued, “Have you seen my mother?”
“She's downstairs checking on the flowers.”
“I was hoping she would help me with this silly thing.” Myles stepped into the room while he fumbled with the disheveled bowtie around his neck.
“Here, let me help you with that,” she said trying to repair the mess he had made.
“Whose idea was it to wear monkey suits?” He asked holding his chin in the air.
“God, you are such a complainer. I suppose you were hoping to wear jeans and a t-shirt,” she teased.
“Hey, there is nothing wrong with a good pair of Levi's and clean white t-shirt,” was his playful response.
Their banter created a familiar intimacy Myles had only felt with Katelin.
“Katie..., I am sorry about the other morning...I am sorry...”
While Myles struggled with his apology Kate softly touched his lips with her finger and said, “Ssshhh, not today...Okay?”
“Okay,” Myles agreed.
He wanted to take Katelin in his arms, and tell her that he was sorry for making her cry. Myles was sorry for not being there when she needed him the most, but he knew that she was right, now was not the time.
“You two make a handsome couple,” Joanna said proudly watching the two of them as she stood in the doorway.
“And you are beautiful.” Myles kissed his mother on the cheek and smiled.
“We’d better get downstairs,” Joanna said. “The guests are arriving and Meggie says we can’t keep them waiting.”
The Kincaid's backyard was filled with antique pink roses, lavender calla lilies, lush green ferns, and touches of baby's breath. Folding chairs had been meticulously placed in rows for the attendees. Christopher, Michael, and Bryan ushered family, friends and business associates to their seats as they arrived to witness the couple’s vows.
It wasn’t long before James and Myles took their place next to Father Frank O’Leary, who was both a family friend, and their parish priest. Soft music began to play while James proudly watched Kasey, Katelin, and Joanna as they made their way toward him. Handing Kate her bouquet, Joanna and James turned to face Father O’Leary. The Large oak tree in the backyard had played a part in numerous family gatherings, and now James and Joanna stood under its graceful boughs as they pledged their love for one another.
“I Joanna, take you James to be my husband, my partner in life, my best friend. I will trust you, respect you, laugh with you, and cry with you. I will love you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face, and when difficulties arise we will face them together. I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward, always and forever.”
James echoed Joanna's loving vows. It had been difficult after Kathleen passed way. He never thought he would find happiness again, but here she was standing beside him.
“I now pronounce you man and wife,” Father O’Leary announced, as family and friends broke into applause. The reception that followed was more like a traditional Irish Ceili than your typical wedding celebration. There was dancing, music, and Irish whiskey for all.
“Make a toast,” Michael Quinn encouraged his best friend.
Kevin McKenna stood, raised his glass, and in his native tongue, made a customary Irish toast.
“May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields,
And, until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand.”
“Slainté!” The guests exclaimed, raising their glasses in honor of the newlyweds.
After the toast, a hush filled the room as Kasey and Katelin sat down to play a duet. The piece they had chosen was one of Joanna’s favorites; it was a tune she had taught them when they were young girls. Kathleen had encouraged both of her daughters to take music lessons from Joanna; Kasey took piano lessons, while Katelin learned how to master the violin. Both of them had an extraordinary talent, but Kate’s desire to perfect her gift, along with the passion and enthusiasm with which she played, caused her to mature as a musician. A maturity Joanna had only dreamed of.
Tucking the violin under h
er chin Katelin raised her bow and waited as Kasey began to play. Myles watched Katie as she effortlessly caressed her instrument. There was a beauty and sadness about her music that Myles had never heard before. He thought about how easy it had been to fall in love with her.
Following the performance, Katelin carefully placed her instrument in its case. As she closed the lid Myles came up behind her. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he buried his nose in her reddish-brown hair and inhaled her scent.
Pulling her closer, he said, “I've missed you Katie.”
Katelin held her breath for a moment trying to resist the flood of emotions that had come over her. Turning to face Myles, she found herself hopelessly lost in the warmth of his eyes. As he began caressing her face with slow and tender kisses, Kate’s defenses began to lower.
Closing her eyes, Katelin sighed, “Myles....”
Myles could feel her body tremble. Placing his mouth over Kate’s to silence her protest; he softly captured her lips again and again, taking pleasure in their sweet taste until her heart felt as though it would burst. As his passion grew Katelin tightened her grip on the table behind her, and braced her heart, knowing that if she were to let go she might become hopelessly lost in his passion.
Chapter Nine
James Quinn hadn’t always been a fortunate man; he thought as he sat in a large leather chair, behind an extravagant mahogany desk. Personal possessions that he had gathered over the years were scattered around his office. Taking inventory of each item, James found his thoughts drifting back to a time when money was tight, and he wondered where his next meal would come from.
It had been a difficult childhood growing up in South Boston. Mary Quinn had died as a result of complications during childbirth—his birth. Daniel Quinn, a blue collar worker, struggled to hold down a fulltime job and raise his son alone. Most evenings, his father, would come home after James was in bed, and when they did spend time together Daniel had few words to spare for his son. As a child, he couldn’t help but think that somehow his father blamed him for his mother's death.
James could still hear the children laughing on the playground as they made fun of the grease stained paper bags he carried his lunch in, and the iron on patches that covered the holes in his threadbare jeans. The small amount of money that James made from his paper route went to help out at home, and still it wasn’t good enough. James was determined that his life would be different. Studying hard he brought home straight A’s. After James graduated from high school his future seemed set, when Boston’s Architectural College offered James a scholarship. But, instead of staying close to home, he wanted to get far away from the memories of his childhood, far away from his father.
Daniel Quinn’s family had come to America during the Irish Diasporas. They fled from the poverty and civil unrest that was Ireland in the early nineteen-hundreds, hoping to find a better life across the ocean, in the land of promise. That dream had come full circle when James Quinn decided to attend the University in Dublin.
His new life in Ireland seemed perfect, James made new friends, and had a new purpose, until the day he met her. It was the spring of ‘63 when he first laid eyes on the lovely lass from County Cork. A friend from University had invited James to his home in the small village of Ballingeary. It was a Saturday night at Crowley’s Pub, and sitting at the corner table, drinking her usual pint of Harp was Miss Kathleen Sinead Murphy. She was a natural Irish beauty; her fair skin, freckles, and auburn hair accentuated her blue-green eyes, a blue-green that reminded James of the sea glass he collected from the ocean as a boy.
His friend noticed James staring at the lovely young woman. “Ah, you’ve been smitten by the fairest maiden in the village. Let’s introduce you then,” his friend laughed, leading him to her table.
As they approached the booth in the corner, James noticed a book of poems sitting next to Kathleen. “You like Yeats,” he began, looking down at the well worn book.
“What Irish man or woman doesn’t?” She asked glancing at the book poems and back at James. “You’re a yank, I’d guessed as much the moment I laid eyes on you. Kathleen Murphy.” She introduced herself with an Irish lilt that could melt even the coldest heart.
“You’re not going to hold that against me are you?” James asked.
“What that you’re a yank? Not if you buy me a pint,” Kathleen said with a mischievous little smile.
James wasn’t the kind to believe in love at first sight, but from the moment he saw Kathleen he knew he had to have her, and he did. The two were married only a few years later, deciding to move back to America where they settled down and started a family.
By now James Quinn had become accustom to getting anything he set his mind to, and so the determination of his youth was now a reality—and still it wasn’t good enough.
Staring soberly at a wall filled with certificates and awards he thought of his father, knowing he would never hear the words he longed to hear, I am proud of you son. Daniel Quinn had passed away shortly after James and Kathleen had returned from Ireland. His father would never know of his success.
Looking up from his desk, he saw the family photos neatly arrange on the credenza, along with a Babe Ruth autographed baseball, and a framed Red Sox program from Fenway Park, 1967; the year commonly referred to as “The Impossible Dream”. Buried among his most valued possessions was a picture that Kathleen had taken the Christmas before she passed away. James was seated on the couch in their living room, surrounded by his children; they seemed happy, but it was only an illusion—what had happened to his family?
Complacency had crept into the Quinn’s marriage, and it wasn’t long before Kathleen and James slowly began to grow apart, by the time Bryan was born they barely spoke to one another. His ambition and the long hours he spent at work had driven a wedge between the two of them, and when Kathleen was diagnosed with cancer the gulf between them became too wide to cross.
After her death, nothing was the same; Kathleen had been the glue that held their broken family together. The years following their tragic loss had been difficult, both emotionally and financially. James spent long hours at the office trying to repair his struggling business, but he could do nothing as he watched his life gradually come apart. His greatest regret was that he hadn't spent enough time with his family, his children, but now that he had married Joanna, James hoped he could make amends for all the mistakes he had made.
Kasey and Katelin had been invited to join their father for an early lunch. His secretary ordered sandwiches from the deli across the street and set the table on the veranda just outside his office, where the view of the mountains was breathtaking.
The sisters arrived together, wondering why they had been summoned to their father’s place of business.
“What’s the meeting about?” Kasey inquired.
“Can't a father have lunch with his daughters?” James asked, pointing to the lavish spread on the balcony.
Katelin could count on one hand the number of times she had been in their father's hallowed space. It felt cold and unfamiliar, which was odd considering most of Kate’s family worked in the building.
The conversation over lunch varied; they talked about the business, music, and family, small talk that was laced with an undercurrent of unease. Twenty minutes into the conversation there was the usual uncomfortable pause.
“I have something I need to tell the two of you,” James said breaking the silence while nervously shifting his weight from one side of the chair to the other. “I know I haven't always been the best father, but please don't ever doubt how much I love the two of you.”
Kasey and Katelin looked at each other, puzzled by his statement. The relationship with their father had always been tense and awkward, especially since their mother’s death. They had needed the love of their father, but instead of taking them to recitals, or checking out the latest boyfriend, he left their rearing to Meggie.
James reached over and handed Kasey an envelope. “Your m
other wanted me to give this to you, when the time was right.”
Kasey opened the envelope and removed its contents. She recognized the handwriting; it was her mother's. Kasey began reading the letter out loud...
My Dearest Girls,
This is a hard letter to write, knowing that my time with you is short. My heart breaks when I think of all the things I will miss when I am gone. I’ll miss seeing the two of you grow up to be the beautiful and talented women I know you will be. I’ll miss watching you fall in love, marry, and have children—my grandchildren. I’ll miss tucking them in at bedtime and telling them stories of Ireland.
I am sorry that I can’t be with you now; I wanted to be the one to tell you about Patrick. I am hoping this letter will be a start, and that you will eventually come to understand why things happened the way they did. Life isn’t always fair, but in the end it will guide you to where you are meant to be, and when you arrive you will know it.
I met Patrick O’Connor when I was only 18, and Ireland was a different place. I loved him, but our paths seemed to be set in stone, and circumstances tore us apart. Many years later we were given a second chance, but ours was a love that was as impossible as it was wonderful. My affair with Patrick was brief, but from our love I was given a gift, two of the loveliest creatures I had ever seen.
Kasey Anne —you have Patrick's strength, his patience, and his love for Ireland. I see him in everything you do. Stay true to your heart, and in it you will find the truth. Katelin, my cailin —you have your father’s creativity, his enthusiasm, and his love for life. It is that zeal, and love for life and family that will carry you through anything.
I have made many mistakes, and I hope that one day the two of you will forgive me for them. Whatever happens, know that I love you both, more than life itself.
Your mother always
Tears ran down Kasey's cheeks, as she set the letter on the table, stood up, and walked out of the office without saying a word to Kate or James.
