The Starcrossed

by Ben Bova

  Oxnard blinked It was like the first time he had tried sky-diving. One minute you’re safely strapped into the plane and the next you’re out in the empty air, falling, disoriented, watching the blur of Earth spinning up to hit you.

  The door slammed behind him. The entryway of the house was ablaze with fights. Oxnard and Brenda stood there dripping and disheveled, gaping at the cameras, people, props, chairs, lights.

  “Smile!” a voice shouted. “You’re on candid camera.” “What?”

  Ron Gabriel pushed past a tripod-mounted camera directly in front of them, a huge grin on his face.

  “Only kidding, buhbula. Don’t panic.”

  He was wearing nothing but a bath towel draped around his middle. He was a smallish, compactly built man in his thirties, Oxnard guessed: dark straight hair cut in the latest neo-Victorian mode, blazing dark eyes, hairy chest, the beginnings of a pot belly.

  He grabbed Brenda and kissed her mightily. Then turning casually to Oxnard, he asked, “You her husband or something?”

  “Or something,” Oxnard replied, feeling testy. “Hey come on, I’m paying overtime already!”

  A large, lumpy, bearded man stepped out from behind the cameras. He was swathed in a green and purple dashiki. Some sort of optical viewer hung from a silver cord around his neck.

  Gabriel grabbed Brenda and Oxnard by the arms and walked them back behind the cameras.

  “What’s going on?” Brenda asked.

  “I’m renting my foyer to Roscoe for filming his latest epic.”

  “Roscoe?” Oxnard was impressed. “The guy who did the underground film festival at Radio City Music Hall?”

  “Who else?” Gabriel answered.

  Now it all made sense to Oxnard. Two dozen girls of starlet dimensions stood around languidly, in various styles of undress. A couple of muscular, hairy guys were doing pushups over in a far comer of the foyer. Electricians, lighting women, camera persons of indeterminate gender, and a few other handymen were busily moving cameras and lights around the long, narrow foyer.

  “All right already!” Roscoe bellowed in a voice four times too large for Grand Central Station. “Everybody take their places for the grope scene!”

  Brenda said, “I’m awfully chilled. Could I borrow a hot shower?”

  “Sure,” Gabriel said. “Throw your clothes in the dryer and grab a couple of robes out of my closet. Brenda, you know where everything is. Show him around.”

  Oxnard stammered, “Uh… we’re not… not together. I mean, not like that.” Dammit! he raged to himself. Why should I feel embarrassed?

  With a grin, Gabriel led him to the guest room and took a terryplastic robe from a drawer.

  “Gotta get back to work now,” he said.

  “You’re in the movie?”

  Gabriel’s grin broadened. “I’m an assistant groper.”

  Brenda looked good with a rich brown robe pulled snugly around her, Oxnard decided. One glance in a mirror after his steamshower had convinced him that wearing a robe two sizes too small was better than prancing around nude. But not much. His hairy legs showed to midcalf. He had to be careful how he sat.

  Brenda, Gabriel and Ornard were sitting in the living room. It was furnished in old-fashioned Nineteen Sixties style, with authentic green berets and protest posters artfully arranged here and there. The walls were covered with paintings, drawings, sketches—all from stories that Gabriel had written.

  The camera crew was in the process of stowing gear into the truck they had parked outside. Roscoe himself had borrowed Brenda’s keys to move her car out of the driveway. Now, as the three of them sat in the comfortable living room, they could hear the wind-whipped rain and the sounds of grunting people moving heavy pieces of equipment out into the wet.

  Oxnard and Brenda had brandy snifters in their hands. Gabriel, still clad in only his bath towel, had graciously poured them the drinks while making dates with three of Roscoe’s starlets. He refrained from drinking, himself.

  “When did you become a movie actor?” Brenda asked, a quizzical smile on her lips.

  “Always been an actor, sweetie,” he replied. “You think sitting through a story conference with some of those assholes you call executives doesn’t take thespic talents?”

  “I’ve seen histrionics from you…”

  One of the starlets walked barefoot into the living room as far as Gabriel’s slingback chair. She was wearing a knit sweater that barely reached her thighs. Her cascading blonde hair was slightly longer. Her eyes didn’t seem to focus well.

  “Hey Ron, honey, can I use your shower?”

  “Sure, sure,” he said.

  “Thanks.” She bent over and kissed him on the cheek. The sweater rode up and Oxnard found himself tugging at the hem of his borrowed robe, trying to make certain that he was covered adequately. The blonde plodded sleepily out of the room without rearranging her sweater.

  “But I don’t understand why you’re performing in Roscoe’s movie,” Brenda resumed.

  Gabriel made a sour face. “Money, kid. Why else? You have any idea how much it takes to keep this house going? My gardener makes more than that cutesy-poo does.” He jerked a thumb in the general direction of the partially sweatered starlet.

  “But you’ve got so many books and filmscripts… you must make plenty on royalties.”

  With a wave of his hand that took in all the illustrations on the walls, Gabriel said, “What books? You know what you get from books? Nickels and dimes. Unless you write a book about a veterinarian’s carnal lust for his customers. Nobody reads about people anymore. I write about people.”

  Oxnard felt puzzled. “Aren’t you the Ron Gabriel who writes science fiction? I’ve read some of your stuff.”

  Gabriel’s eyebrows went up a centimeter. “Yeah? Like what?”

  “Let’s see now…” Oxnard concentrated. “It was… oh yes, ‘The Beast That Had No Mouth.’ and ‘Repent…’ something about a watchmaker.”

  Nodding furiously, Gabriel said, “Yeah. And you know how much money I made from those two books? Peanuts! The goddam publishers give you peanuts for an advance, then they sell a zillion copies and claim that they haven’t made enough money to start paying royalties yet!”

  “I didn’t know…”

  Gabriel leaped out of his chair. “Those humpers! You don’t know the half of it!”

  He stomped out of the room. Confused, Oxnard got up and watched Gabriel duck down the house’s central atrium and into a doorway. He slammed the door behind him.

  “That’s his office,” Brenda said.

  “What’s he…”

  The muffled sound of Gabriel’s voice floated back to them. “Sue the bastards… I don’t care what it costs… get them for every nickel they owe me…”

  Brenda stood up beside Oxnard “He must be calling his lawyer.”

  “At this hour?” Oxnard glanced at his watch. It was after midnight.

  “Ron’s friends and associates are accustomed to his late hours. He starts working when the sun goes down.”

  “Must be part vampire.”

  “It’s been suggested.”

  Abruptly, the office door opened and Gabriel came stamping back into the living room. “We’ll get those mothers,” he was muttering.

  As they all sat down again, Brenda asked, “What about the TV series you were doing? I thought…”

  “Don’t mention it!” Gabriel snapped. “The less said about that, the better.”

  For an instant the room was silent, except for the rain drumming on the roof.

  Then Gabriel said, “We had the whole goddam series set up. Worked my tail off for six months; fights with the producers, fights with the network, the director, the actors. Finally they began to see the light. It’s all starting to go right. I could feel it! We had it all in the groove…”

  “What was the show about?” Oxnard asked.

  “Huh? Oh, it was going to be a series based on a short story of mine, about a giant pterodactyl that at
tacks New York City.”

  “I heard about it,” Brenda said. “And then it was cancelled, just before shooting began. What happened?”

  “What happened?” Gabriel’s voice went up several notches. “Those lumpheaded brain-damage cases that run the network decided they couldn’t do the show because it wasn’t in three-dee!”

  “No!”

  “Oh no? Those maggotheads are turning everything into three-dee shows. Everything! I thought, great. The series will be even more spectacular in three-dee. But we’d need a bigger budget and a couple weeks to work out some of the technical problems. Wham! Nothing doing. They cut us off. Done. Finished.”

  Oxnard felt vaguely guilty about it. He stirred uneasily in his chair, started to cross his legs, but remembered just. in time and stopped himself.

  “Know what they put into our timeslot?” Gabriel was still fuming. “A cops-and-robbers show. Some idiot thing about a robot and a Polack cop. Ever see an animated fireplug doing Polish jokes? Arrgghhh.”

  Roscoe suddenly called from the front doorway. “Hey superstar! We’re leaving!”

  Without moving from his chair, Gabriel bellowed, “So leave already! Just make sure you send the check tomorrow morning!”

  “Will do,” Roscoe hollered back. “Oh, Rita and DeeDee said they’re too tired for the drive back to Glendale. They flaked out in your guest room. Okay by you?”

  “Yah, sure. I’ll unflake ’em later on.”

  “Good luck, buddy.”

  “Break a leg, C.B.”

  The door slammed.

  Oxnard cleared his throat. “Do you mean that they really cancelled your show because it wasn’t going to be shown in holographic projection?”

  “That was their excuse,” Gabriel answered. “They wanted to castrate me. I’m too honest for those Byzantine bronze nosers.” He glowered at Brenda. “And I still say that Finger had something to do with it”

  Brenda returned his gaze without flinching.

  “But still,” Gabriel grumbled, “I’d like to meet the jerk who started this three-dee crap and…”

  “What about that other project you were talking about?” Brenda broke in. “The historical thing. Was it going to be a musical?”

  Gabriel scratched at his stubbly chin. “That thingl I got the shaft on that, too.”

  “What was it going to be?”

  “I was going to do ‘Romeo and Juliet’ in modern terms. You know, instead of Italy in the old times, make it L.A., here, today. Make the two feuding families a pair of TV networks that are fighting it out for the ratings.” He grew more animated, expressive. Getting to his feet, gesticulating: “Then the star from one show on the first network falls in love with a girl from a show on the other network. Their shows are on the air at the same time… they love each other, but their networks are enemies. Then when the executive producers find out about them…”

  It took nearly an hour before Gabriel calmed down enough to sit in his chair again. He ended his monologue with:

  “Then some jerk says that its just like some old opera called ‘West Side Story.’ I looked it up… wasn’t anything like that at all.”

  “So that’s fallen through, too?” Brenda asked.

  “That’s right,” Gabriel said, slumping back in his soft chair, looking exhausted. “Every goddam thing I’ve touched for the past year has turned to shit. Every goddam thing.” He sat bolt upright. “It’s gotta be Fingerl He swore I’d never work for anybody in this town again. He’s living up to his name, that no-good.…”

  “That’s not true, Ron,” Brenda said. “He wants you to work for him. He needs you. He’s desperate.”

  Gabriel stopped in midsentence and stared at her. “He needs me?”

  Brenda nodded gravely.

  “Good! Tell him to go engage reflexively in sexual intercourse.”

  It took Oxnard a moment to interpret that one, although Brenda giggled immediately.

  “No, Ron. I’m serious. B.F.’s really in a bind and you’re the only one who can pull him out.”

  “Got any rocks? Heavy ones?”

  “Wait a minute,” Oxnard heard himself say. They both turned toward him. “Before we go any further, you ought to know… I invented the holographic projection system.”

  Half expecting Gabriel to leap for his throat, Oxnard sat tensed in his chair, ready to defend himself verbally or physically.

  “You invented it?” asked Gabriel incredulously.

  “I’m Bill Oxnard. The jerk who started this three-dee stuff.”

  They talked. They sat in the comfortably furnished living room, draped with towel and robes while the rain made background music for them, and talked for hours. One of the girls from further back in the house wandered sleepily into the room, naked, looking for the kitchen and murmuring about a midnight snack. The phone next to Gabriel’s chair rang a couple of times and he snarled into it briefly. Oxnard told him about the exciting days when he was perfecting the first holographic system, how the corporate executives had beamed at him and given him bonuses. And then how they tossed him out of the corporation when he asked for a share of the royalties they were reaping.

  “They screwed you out of your own invention,” Gabriel said, with real pain in his voice. “Just like they’ve screwed me out of my royalties.”

  “It was my own stupid fault,” Oxnard said. “I was so wrapped up in the technical work that I didn’t pay any attention to the legal side.”

  “Why the hell should you have to?” Gabriel demanded. “If those pricks were honest men you wouldn’t have to worry about them sticking it to you. They were clean clothes, but their skins are slimy. The bastards.”

  Gabriel showed Oxnard his own three-dee set and they turned it on. The Keir Dullea similacrum appeared in miniature, hovering in the far comer of the living room, riding a model spacecraft across a simulated Martian crater. The images looked solid, but they sparkled and shimmered.

  “Most of that’s in the transmission system,” Oxnard said, squinting at the scintillations in the images. “But I think I can improve the picture quality a little, if you have a toolkit handy.”

  Gabriel produced a toolkit. Oxnard went happily to work on the mahogany-like plastic console that housed the threedee receiver, tinkering with the controls in the back.

  Brenda, meanwhile, outlined Titanic Productions’ precarious fiscal situation. By the time Oxnard rejoined the conversation, she was saying:

  “Of course, he’s screaming that he’ll never deal with you again. Repeat, never. But he knows that he needs a good show right away and you’ve got the imagination and talent to create it for him.”

  Gabriel was lying fiat on the Rya carpet, stretched out in front of the sofa on which Brenda was sitting. She had her legs tucked demurely under her, Oxnard noticed. Keir Dullea had ridden off into the sunset, so Oxnard turned off the set.

  “No, I won’t work for Finger. That sonofabitch is just too slimy to deal with. He’d sell his own mother to the cannibals.”

  “But you wouldn’t have to deal with Finger,” Brenda urged. “You could work with Les.…”

  “That turd!”

  “And me.”

  Gabriel heaved a deep sigh, making the towel around his middle flutter slightly. “It would be nice, baby. I’d really like to work with you. You’re one of the few honest people left in this town…”

  “I’d enjoy working with you, too, Ron. You know that.” Oxnard found himself frowning at both of them.

  “But…” Gabriel said, his voice distant and small, “I’ve gotten so emotionally involved.…”

  “You?”

  “Yeah. With this ‘Romeo and Juliet’ project. I really wanted to tackle Shakespeare. Bring the Old Bard up to date. There’s no greater challenge to a writer. I wanted to show them all that I could do it.”

  Brenda shook her head. “No, I don’t think ‘Romeo and Juliet’ would be right for The Tube. Those New York bankers want something sound and safe… not Shakespeare. They n
eed something much more conventional, like science fiction.”

  “Science fiction!” Gabriel complained. “Is that all those frogbrains can think of? I’m sick of science fiction; it’s on every network, every show. Why can’t we do something new, fresh, original?”

  “Like ‘Romeo and Juliet?’ Oxnard asked, sitting down beside Brenda.

  “Yeah, why not?” Gabriel countered.

  “Ron, Titanic won’t go for a show that deals with the networks or the studios,” Brenda said. “That’s realism! You know how they steer clear of that. Why, even the news programs get permission before they put anything real on the air.”

  “Yeah, I know.” Tiredly.

  Oxnard said, “No starcrossed lovers, then.”

  Brenda started to reply, but Gabriel said, “What was that?”

  “Huh? Oh, I said… no starcrossed lovers. You know, Romeo and Juliet.”

  Gabriel sat bolt upright. “Starcrossed loversl Holy shit! That’s it!” He leaped to his feet. “That’s it! Wow, what an idea!”

  The towel started sliding downward and Gabriel made an automatic grab for it as he pranced around the room. “That’s it!” he said again. “That’s it!”

  Brenda was grinning but she looked just as befuddled as Oxnard felt. “What? Tell us.”

  Pouncing atop the three-dee console, Gabriel shouted: “They want science fiction and I want Shakespeare. We’ll merge ’em… He stood on the console, stretched to his full height, flung his arms over his head and boomed:

  “THE STARCROSSED!”

  The towel fell to the floor.

  Time lost its meaning. At some point the rain slackened, then died away altogether. The windows of the living room started to show the misty gray promise of a new day. Inside the room, Bill Oxnard felt himself being drawn into the chaotic vortex of creation. It was like being present at the creation of a new world.

  “There’re these two families, see,” Gabriel was saying, oblivious of his nudity, “on two different spaceships. They’re merchants… they go from planet to planet, trading goods. You know, spices, hardware…”

  “With a gambling casino in the back,” Brenda suggested.

  Gabriel eyed her. “Maybe… maybe it would work. Well, anyway. One family has this guy, the youngest son of the head of the family…”