The Lightning-Struck Heart

by T. J. Klune

  But it was enough for this moment. For now. For good.

  I didn’t have to think or speak. There was something flitting along the edges of my vision and tongue, like memory or déjà vu. It rankled that it was so close, like a dream faded but not forgotten. Not completely.

  The lighting struck the palm of my left hand that I’d raised in front of me. It coursed up my arm and everything was blue blue blue, and it tripped and stuttered over my heart as it crawled along my chest. For a moment, I thought to take it in, to take this wizard’s magic and make it my own, to pull it inside and keep it there. It’d be so easy, especially with yet another piece of the cornerstone solidified in place. But there wasn’t enough time. The fire geckos were at the edge of the forest, and I could hear their growls and snarls, the snap of their jaws and teeth, the scrape of their claws. A burst of fire erupted from the edge of the woods as the lightning crackled in me, wrapping itself around me, and I thought how easy it would be. Not to absorb it. To redirect it. To make it my own.

  Only a few seconds had passed since the electricity first hit my hand. The last bit slunk in through my skin as the Dark’s eyes widened. I raised my other hand and pointed it toward the Dark Woods, and there was no need for words, no need for complicated hand movements. One moment the lightning was circling my heart and the next it was flowing out of me as the first of the fire geckos breached the tree line, eyes blazing.

  Everything felt blue.

  And the lightning left me then. Just like I’d allowed it in. It curled down my arm, bits and pieces arcing out along my skin before shooting off toward the approaching geckos. They screamed as the ground erupted around them, bodies seizing and fire spitting.

  And then it was silent.

  “So,” Dark the First said. “That was a thing that happened.”

  “Yeah,” Dark the Second said, sounding like he was choking. “It did.”

  I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. A line of fire geckos lay charred and smoking along the side of the road. I could hear more in the woods. It must have been quite the pack of them.

  “He’s still coming with us,” Dark the First said, steeling his resolve.

  Dark the Second snorted. “Yeah. Okay. You go get him, then.”

  I said, “Come and get me.” Like a badass.

  Dark the First hesitated. “Or maybe we’ll just let him go.”

  Dark the Second said, “That sounds like a better plan.”

  They ran one way.

  I ran the other.

  I took a moment to think of syl and bre and a sharp breeze blew back behind me, blowing my scent and the smell of burned gecko toward the Darks. When the remaining geckos burst from the tree line, they didn’t even look in my direction. Their nostrils flared and they growled, skittering along the ground as they took off after the Darks.

  I looked up ahead and the road curved around a shallow bend. I took the curve and skidded to a halt. Gary, Tiggy, and Ryan were stopped in the roadway, staring at me. Tiggy still had Ryan over his shoulder, but Ryan had moved almost to a sitting position, his hands in Tiggy’s hair.

  I didn’t know I’d had an audience.

  I really should have expected it.

  Nosy bastards.

  “Heeey,” I said, waving a hand at them, going for nonchalant and failing miserably.

  “What,” Gary said.

  “Sparklies,” Tiggy said.

  “Ungh,” Ryan said.

  Silence.

  Then, “I don’t suppose there’s a chance you didn’t see any of that.”

  “Saw everything,” Gary said.

  “Lizards get fried,” Tiggy said.

  “Ungh,” Ryan said.

  More silence.

  “Well, then. So. Look. I’m a wizard. These things are expected.”

  “You redirected lightning that was shot at you by a Dark wizard and used it to take out half a pack of fire geckos,” Gary said, sounding slightly hysterical. “What part of that is expected?”

  “Magic Sam is powerful Sam,” Tiggy said. “Fizz bang snapple crack.”

  “How do you do that?” Ryan asked, voice very, very hoarse.

  “Uh,” I said. “Magically?” Good argument.

  “Gross,” Gary muttered.

  “You poking my ear,” Tiggy said to Ryan. “Knight Delicious Face poking my ear.”

  Ryan flushed even further. “It’s just my sword,” he said stiffly.

  “So gross,” Gary said.

  “Let’s move on before they come back,” I said, hoping that was the end of the conversation.

  Of course it wouldn’t be that easy.

  I was walking away when Gary said, “Sam.”

  I stopped, curling my hands into fists at my sides. I didn’t turn around.

  “I’ve known wizards,” he said, and I knew the others were listening with the same intent. “Met even more. There are limits. Hard limits as to what they can do. Magic is not the be-all, end-all. It’s not infinite. I know, because my own magic is not infinite. Not even when I had my horn.”

  “And?” I said.

  “You,” he said, and I could hear the love and reverence in his voice. But it was covering up an awe that sounded almost like fear. “You can do things that I’ve never seen before. That no one has ever seen before. Sam. Look at me.”

  And I did. Because he was my friend. I turned and looked at Gary. At Tiggy. And at Ryan. I looked at Ryan and wondered just how afraid for my heart I was. We were so close now. Tarker Mills was visible in the distance. Beyond that on the horizon were the Northern Mountains, great peaks that rose high and disappeared into the clouds. Between those peaks lay a keep with a dragon and a prince. We were so close to what we’d come for, and my heart hurt at the thought of how, while this was just the beginning for Tiggy, Gary, and me, it was going to be the end of Ryan and me. We’d save the Prince and part ways. The next time I’d see him, he would be married to Justin and I would be the same, a wizard’s apprentice without a cornerstone. The time apart would dull the sharp edges of the hurt, and with luck, any feelings would have started to fade. Maybe one day, I’d be able to look back on this adventure and think to myself that my first heartbreak made me stronger. Made me better.

  “Sam,” Gary said, “just how powerful are you?”

  Because they never knew. Morgan, Randall made sure no one did. There were things that couldn’t be discussed. This had been one of them. But they’d figure it out. Sooner rather than later, especially once we got to Castle Freesias.

  So I said the only thing I could. “I don’t think anyone really knows. Come on. We’re almost to the end.”

  CHAPTER 19

  Things Are About to Get Corny

  MY SELF-REFLECTION and obviously extraordinarily valid man pain and angst came to a crashing halt only fifteen minutes later.

  “So. Much. Corn,” I breathed.

  “Oh no,” Gary said. “Sam—”

  Because there was. It was still very early in the season, but fields upon fields stretched with tiny corn stalks, and all I could picture in my head was months down the road when they’d be taller than I was and how everyone was going to need Sam of Wilds’s Amazing Fireworks Corn because how else would they know when the corn was ready? Sure, these people had probably been growing corn for hundreds of years, but they didn’t know what I knew! And there was no person in existence that didn’t like fireworks, which was why my idea was so brilliant to begin with.

  Fuck Morgan and his insistence that it would never work.

  In fact.

  “Morgan!” I bellowed when he answered the summoning crystal. “You magnificent bastard. The corn! The corn.”

  “No,” Morgan said. “No. Sam. No.”

  “You don’t understand. There is acres of it. It goes on as far as I can see. And I can see very far.”

  “Sam.”

  “Morgan. Listen. I am giving you a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity here. You can be part of all of this.” I waved the crystal around to s
how him.

  He sighed. “Sam, you realize I can’t actually see anything, right?”

  “You have a very vivid imagination.”

  “Do I?” he said, dry as I’d ever heard him.

  “Business partners!” I said, not willing to be deterred. “Sure, it’ll take some time to build up the capital, and I’ll probably need you to invest in the startup. Maybe half. Okay. I lied. All of it. I’m pretty sure I don’t have any money. Well, I do, but you keep it in the banks and won’t let me touch it.”

  “Because you want to make firework corn.”

  “To be fair,” Gary said, “there is a lot of corn. And when it burns down the fields, it’ll probably go quickly. I don’t think anyone will suffer when they burn. Too much.”

  “I will leave you in the Dark Woods,” I hissed at him.

  “Sam, there will be no firework corn,” Morgan said. “I think it might be time that you let that one go.”

  I glared at the crystal in my hands. “You know, Morgan, when you took me to the castle the first time, I wish you’d told me that your main job was to crush dreams.”

  “Because you would have done what, exactly?”

  “Given you more hugs because your soul is obviously black and withered.”

  “Crisis averted,” he said, and with that, I was filled with such an ache. It’d been weeks since I’d seen Morgan. He was my mentor, but more than that, he was my friend. Our magic was entwined, and not for the first time, I wondered if he could be my cornerstone. I’d never asked him if wizards could do that for each other. He calmed me, but it didn’t necessarily settle my magic. But maybe I hadn’t tried hard enough.

  Deep down, I knew, though. Deep down, I thought it might only be Ryan. Even if Morgan had told me that there could be others, in my secret heart, in the place that wished to the stars, there was only Ryan.

  “Uh-oh,” Gary said.

  “What?” Morgan asked.

  “Sam is having an overabundance of feelings.”

  “I get hugs,” Tiggy said. “Sam has feelings, Tiggy gets hugs.”

  “What brought this on?” Morgan sighed.

  “I miss your face,” I told the crystal. “I love you and you are my friend and I don’t think I tell you enough that we should be friends forever. Because we should. Five hundred years from now, we should still be talking about firework corn. I will never leave you. Ever.”

  “Does he do this often?” Ryan whispered to Gary.

  “Only when Morgan pretends that he doesn’t love Sam even though it’s obvious he thinks Sam is the greatest thing in the world,” Gary whispered back.

  My eyes were wide. “You think I’m the greatest thing in the world?” I said into the crystal.

  “Notice how that was Gary saying that,” Morgan said. “Not me.”

  “I wish I was a bard so I could write a song for you,” I said, ignoring him completely. “It wouldn’t be like ‘Cheesy Dicks and Candlesticks.’”

  Morgan coughed loudly. “I don’t even want to know.”

  “I don’t think most of us do know,” Ryan said. “Or, at least, I don’t. Is it normal to be in a constant state of what the fuck with these three? I feel like that’s normal.”

  “Yes,” Morgan said. “Every day. All the time. Some days, you even think you’re getting used to it only to realize you’re not.”

  “Don’t say fuck!” I growled at Ryan. “Remember your place!”

  He rolled his eyes and I did not find that attractive. At all. “Sorry,” he said. “I meant to say mothercracker.”

  “Morgan!”

  “Sam.”

  “You are so cool, you are so awesome,” I sang. “You give me feelings that make my heart blossom.”

  They all stared at me. I’m pretty sure Morgan did too, even if he couldn’t see me.

  “What?” I asked. “It was good.”

  “Good being the operative word,” Gary muttered.

  “Hugs?” Tiggy asked. “I not have hugs yet.”

  “You shouldn’t sing,” Ryan said hastily. “It… burns.”

  “Morgan liked it,” I said. “Didn’t you, Morgan?”

  “That is certainly something you would say,” Morgan said.

  “Guess what it was called?”

  “Do I have to?”

  “No. Because I’ll just tell you.”

  “Sam—”

  “It was called ‘Dear Brother-Uncle-Father: An Ode to the Fiery Depths of My Feelings for Your Personage.’”

  “You capitalized that, didn’t you?”

  “You bet your sweet ass I did,” I said. “Now it’s official.”

  “Sam.”

  “Morgan.”

  “No corn. Get to Tarker Mills. Find the keep. Rescue the Prince. Go to Randall. Are these instructions in any way unclear?”

  “You know that song I just sang for you?” I asked him. “I take it back.”

  “I weep,” Morgan said. “A word in private, if I may.”

  I looked up at the others. “Shoo. Secret wizarding business.”

  “Says the apprentice,” Gary coughed.

  “What?”

  “Nothing,” he said sweetly. “Ryan, Tiggy. Away with us. While we wait, I can regale you with the time that Sam was running from a mermaid and somehow ended up naked in a tree.”

  “You promised,” I snapped at him.

  “I lied,” he said as he ushered Ryan and Tiggy away. “So it all started with this mermaid named Abigail who decided she wanted Sam to eat her flounder, if you know what I mean….”

  When they were out of earshot, Morgan said, “Mermaid, Sam? Do I even want to know?”

  “No. Definitely not. It was this whole… thing that turned into an ordeal and did you know getting splinters in your ass is not a fun way to spend a Tuesday?”

  “I can’t say that I do. Especially on Tuesdays.”

  “So what’s up, mentor-mine? Everyone is gone now. You can tell me you miss me without embarrassment.”

  “You have enough embarrassment for the both of us,” he said.

  “Yeah, yeah. I hear the words you aren’t saying. I love you too. No one believes me that you’re secretly a big ball of sap.”

  “Lies,” he said. “All of it.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “Sam.”

  “Morgan.”

  “Crap,” he said. “Now I am going to sound like a big ball of sap.”

  I grinned. “Go ahead. I won’t tell everyone the moment we get done speaking. That would just be rude.”

  “How’s the situation with Ryan?”

  And, of course, my smile faded. “Right for the heart. Good aim.”

  “I find it’s easier than dancing around words.”

  I glanced down the road to make sure the others were far enough away. Ryan’s head was rocked back, his mouth open as he laughed, undoubtedly at Gary’s story about my naked tree mermaid adventure. It was a good look on him.

  Who was I kidding? All looks were good looks on him.

  So I lied. “It’s fine. I’m handling it.”

  But, of course, it was Morgan I was talking to. “Sam.”

  “We danced,” I said suddenly. “In a tavern when the song was slow. He asked me to dance and I said yes.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I could. Because I wanted to. Because I wanted to know what it was like to have something that I’ll never actually have.”

  “I wish,” he said and then stopped. He took a breath and let it out slowly. I could picture him, sitting in the labs, his face scrunched up in concentration. His forehead lined, eyes narrowed. The tip of his tongue sticking out between his teeth like he did when deep in thought. “I wish things could be different for you.”

  I laughed. It wasn’t nearly as bitter as I thought it’d be. “I know. And that’s why I love you.”

  “You’re almost done.”

  “Am I?”

  “With this part, yes. It’s all about the journey, Sam. One day you’ll get your
ending, but until then, remember it’s about the journey. The things you’ve learned. The future you’ll have. I know it may not seem like it right now, and I know it might hurt, but you will be okay. You’re my apprentice. I expect nothing less of you.”

  “I wish you were here,” I admitted to him. “It might get tough.”

  “I wish I was too,” he said. “But I also know you’re stronger than anyone else I’ve ever met.”

  And who knows what we might have said then. How long we might have sat there, spewing our feelings at each other until we were drowning in sunshine and rainbows and Gary’s cookie poop. When I have an abundance of feelings, I tend to go on for days. It’s a proven fact.

  And I tried to work up the courage to tell him about the lightning. About how I’d been able to redirect it through my body and hold it around my heart. How the ceiling to my magic just seemed further and further away, and maybe for the first time, I felt an inkling of fear that there was no ceiling, that it could eventually consume me until I was nothing but a collection of energy with no conduit for release.

  I opened my mouth to say something. Anything.

  But it was ceremoniously cut short when I saw a stranger talking to Gary, Tiggy, and Ryan. My hand tensed around the crystal as green and gold flickered around the edges of my vision.

  Tiggy and Ryan looked relaxed. Carefree.

  Gary, though. Gary looked slightly off. He was holding himself stiffly.

  “Hey,” I said to Morgan. “Gotta go. There’s someone on the road.”

  “Okay. Just watch yourself. I don’t know much about Tarker Mills, and I don’t need you getting captured by Darks or fairies or mermaids or—”

  “I get it,” I said, cutting him off. “And it doesn’t happen that often.”

  “—or selkies or pissed off traveling merchants or that one guy who pledged a blood vendetta against you—”

  “That was not my fault.” It was in my early days of learning to use magic and I’d accidentally set a guy’s hair on fire. I’d put it out before it had caused any damage, but Evil Carl (as he had so named himself) didn’t care. It was an affront to him and he swore vengeance against me and promised one day, I would rue the day I ever heard the name Evil Carl.