The Way We Roll

by Stephanie Perry Moore

  4

  BECAUSE

  “Mom, why do you insist on coming with me to move in?” I said, as my mom put her purse in my car the day I was heading back to school. “You said you were gonna come have lunch with me at work, and you never did. Fashion is my heart, and you keep dismissingthat. A mom is supposed to support her child in all things. I can go to school alone.”

  “Because, Malloy, I was tied up all summer. I couldn’t come to see your work, but I want to make up for that. The time has gone by, and I know I’ve been extremely busy with sorority stuff, but I’m not letting you go back to Western Smith alone. Why do you ask anyway, honey? You don’t want me to go?”

  Her question caught me off guard. It’s not like I’m a person who lies. I always shoot straight from the hip, but I’m not evil, and I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. For some strange reason this seemed like it meant a lot to her.

  As she put my last suitcase in the trunk, I touched her hand and said, “I’m just surprised at all this. Oh, wait, my laptop is in there.”

  She moved her hand in circles. “Well, hurry up. We need to get on up there.”

  “Mom, we’re not in a rush. I don’t have any classes until next week.”

  “We are on a time schedule, dear. I have some plans for us, so let’s go.”

  I had no idea what she meant. She had planned something.Maybe she was trying to make up for time missed.

  Before I got to my apartment, we stopped at an exquisiterestaurant.

  “No Mom, I’m not hungry right now. I really want to get settled in my place.”

  “We have time for that. And of course you’re hungry, darling. It’s lunchtime. You must eat a little something,” she said, being the overprotective mom I knew her to be. “Oh, stop looking so grim. It’s not like you’re eating with me alone. We’ll have someone to stir the conversation,” she said, seeing the frown plastered on my face. “And, yes, before you lose it, it is one of my sorority sisters coming to have lunch with us, because then she’s going to take me back home.”

  “So it wasn’t really that you wanted to help me move in?” I asked condescendingly. “I mean, we haven’t even gone to my place to empty out any of my stuff, and you’re saying after we eat you’ve got a sorority meeting.”

  “Darling, you said yourself you can handle it. I just wanted to come up here with you. I’m not arguing with you, dear, and if it’s that big a deal to you, we can go by the apartment before the meeting, okay?”

  “With some lady I don’t even know. No thank you,” I said, and then there was a knock on the car window.

  “Hello!” my mom said in an excited tone.

  I looked over and was surprised to see Hayden Grant, standing there like she had an appointment with my mom or something.

  “Come on, honey, let’s get out. Our lunch date is here.”

  My mom had to be joking. I didn’t want to speak to that girl, much less break bread with her. As we walked to the restaurant, Hayden was so fake with me. I stepped back, giving the two of them space. They chatted and caught up. Watching them interact, it seemed as if my mother was her mother or something. They seemed so friendly and close. Of course as soon as we sat down, my mom got up to go powder her nose, leaving Hayden and me alone.

  “Okay, now look,” she said to me in a snide tone, “I know you don’t want me here.”

  “So why’d you come?”

  “Because your mom asked me to.”

  “So you came to kiss butt?”

  “You need to change your attitude. Keep being so snide and you won’t go far in life. You seem so bitter and angry. I know what I need to do to get where I need to go.”

  “If kissing other people’s behinds is going to take you to the next level, maybe we’re trying to rise up different buildings.”

  She just rolled her eyes at me.

  “I see you two are chatting away,” my mom said as she sat back down. “Very, very good. Let’s have a quick lunch, Hayden, so we can help Malloy settle in. We’ll have a few minutes before the meeting. I hope that’s all right.”

  “Yes, ma’am, it’s fine,” Hayden said. “I’d love to help your daughter in any way I can.” She displayed another fake grin.

  “So I talked to the regional coordinator, and I know you guys are planning to have a line this fall for sure,” my mom said as I tried to seem uninterested by keeping my head firmly planted in the menu. “I know Malloy isn’t quite sure if she’s going to pledge—of course this is hard for me—but I certainly want her to meet your chapter sorority sisters.”

  “Oh, Mom, I’ve already met them,” I said as I heard Hayden nervously fidget with her plate.

  The look in Hayden’s eyes was one of panic. She knew I was aware that the Betas had already been talking to the girls they wanted to put on line and that one of her line sisters had came out and point blank told me I’d never pledge Alpha chapter. For some weird reason, I didn’t tell this to my mom. Instead I said, “They’re cool. They got passion.”

  “See, I knew you would like these girls.” She leaned over and gave me a big hug.

  I didn’t look at Hayden for her reaction.

  Walking to my car two hours later, I said, “Mom, you guys go on to your meeting. I’ll be fine.”

  “You sure, honey? Our meals took longer than I thought.”

  “I’m fine.”

  Hayden was walking toward me, but I walked away, got in my car, and drove off. Looking in the rearview mirror,a part of me longed to have the kind of interaction Hayden was experiencing with my mom. Maybe Beta Gamma Pi was the key.

  I had just come from the front office and had gotten the keys to my brand-new place. I was so excited not to be in a dorm, to have my own apartment, to live the collegelife. My new car was loaded down from the backseat to the trunk. While unloading, I resented the fact that my mom wasn’t there to help me move in. I certainly could have used the extra hands, I thought as I struggled to figureout what to take out first.

  I decided to go into the apartment and look around first. Though I had seen the place before I’d left last semester,it was like a breath of fresh air being in my new home away from my mom. Even though we each had our own space, it was still stuffy. However, the newness of this two-bedroom apartment and the possibilities that could lie therein excited me. As I went toward my apartmentdoor to go back to my car outside, I was startled when a hard-looking girl exactly my height suddenly had my door key in her hand.

  “You shouldn’t leave this in your door, you know.”

  Quickly I snatched it. Who’d she think she was? And why was she not leaving my space?

  “Yeah, thanks. I know.”

  Her eyes roamed my body. I didn’t know if I’d done something wrong, but I had work to do. I did not have time to stand there with her.

  “Um, thanks, I assume you live here?” I asked.

  “I’m right next door. Our apartments are joined. I can practically see and hear everything you do. Isn’t that great?” she said with way too much excitement.

  “Um, yeah, I guess,” I said, not wanting to offend her. “I’m Malloy.”

  “Sirena Rice,” she said as she held out her hand to shake mine.

  “Oh, I’m dirty. Moving, you know.”

  “Oh, no problem.” She grabbed my hand anyway and firmly shook it up and down.

  “Well, thanks for telling me about the key and all,” I said, trying to get her to leave.

  “You need some help moving?” Sirena asked as she followed me out to my car.

  “No, no, thank you.”

  I did need help, but I didn’t know her. What I could size up in two minutes wasn’t appealing. The chick was pushy. I didn’t need a second mom away from home, but even as I said no, she picked up a box, and inside we headed.

  “I’m a senior here. What year are you?” she asked later as we took the second load inside.

  “I’ll be a sophomore.”

  She started looking through some of the boxes we’d bro
ught in. Was she loony, or did she simply have no home training? I knew everyone in the world didn’t have a mom that lived and breathed from the etiquette book.

  Giving her the benefit of the doubt, I set down the box in my arms and grabbed the one she had. “Thanks, I can get it from here.”

  “Ah, naw, I’m not trying to be nosy or anything. I just didn’t see any paraphernalia, any cheerleading stuff—no dance outfits.”

  “No, I’m not a part of that.”

  “Cool,” Sirena said. “That stuff can mess up a girl’s mind.”

  Even though I’d told her I didn’t need any more help, she refused to stop until everything was inside, organized, and in its right place. We were on a roll. My place was looking good.

  “I’m going to have to keep you around. We got through all this today. I wasn’t planning on finishing unpacking until the end of the week.”

  “Organization is key for me.”

  “What do I owe you? I can’t believe you helped me like this,” I said, going over to my purse.

  “No, I don’t want your money. Maybe you could—” Before she could finish, someone was knocking on my door.

  “You expecting somebody?” she asked in a disappointed tone.

  “Naw.”

  “I’ll tell them to leave,” she said, heading for the door. I walked around her; I needed to get my own door. I was taken aback when I saw a familiar face. Oh, no, she isn’t at my door.

  It was Hayden Grant, now out of her dressier clothes. The Alpha chapter President was representing as she sported her Beta Gamma Pi T-shirt.

  “Can I come in for just a second?” she asked in a sweet tone.

  Not buying the nice act, I asked, “How do you know where I live?”

  “Your mom told me the apartment address. I have some stuff from her to give you. I saw your car, so I knew you were in. So, here I am.”

  Seeing my next-door neighbor looking over my shoulder,I didn’t want to be rude, so I introduced them. “Hayden,this is Sirena. Sirena, this is Hayden.”

  “I thought you told me you weren’t a part of a sorority,”Sirena said, not shaking Hayden’s extended hand.

  “I’m not!” I said quickly. “But obviously she needs to talk to me about stuff, so thanks for coming over and helping.”

  Sirena pushed. “Malloy, I can wait until you guys are done. We still have—”

  Squinting my eyes to try not to get irritated, I interrupted.“We’ve done everything. Thank you.”

  I didn’t want to shove her out the door, but she had overstayed her welcome. Thankfully she walked out.

  “Sounds like your neighbor is bored or something,” Hayden said.

  “She’s cool. What is it my mama wanted to give me?”

  “I don’t know. It’s this envelope. I didn’t open it. Here.”

  It was certainly my mom’s handwriting. What was this letter about? Last year when I was a freshman, she hadn’t given me a note.

  “You didn’t have to take her back home?”

  “Naw, she rode with the regional coordinator.”

  “Oh, I can see them gabbing the entire ride back. Well, thanks, you gave it to me,” I said as I went to open the door again.

  “I just wanted to say,” Hayden began, “I appreciated you earlier today. You could have told your mom my chapter sorors have been pretty ugly to you, me included. I don’t know why you didn’t go there.”

  “Yeah, me neither.”

  “But I appreciate it, and it shows you got something that maybe we really do need to take a look at. Kade told Sharon you won’t see him anymore. So with all that over, I just wanted to let you know that if you’d consider pledging, I want to get you on line.”

  “Why?”

  She shrugged her shoulders, smiled, opened the door, waved, and was gone. I tore open the letter. My mom had written, in big letters, that she loved me. She’d also writtenthat, she prayed I became Hayden’s soror. I sat on my bed and reflected on Hayden’s last words. I had my chance to please my mom. What was I going to do with it? HonestlyI had no clue.

  I had been in my apartment for three days. Sirena had been over to my apartment every single day, multiple times, asking to have dinner. I wasn’t trying to stay to myself, and I certainly could have used a friend, but I just wasn’t bothering with her. She was more than strong-willed, she was overly aggressive. Each time I said no, I knew I had upset her, and I just didn’t need to start a friendship with anybody who was that disappointed, when I couldn’t spend time with them.

  Later that night, my doorbell rang again, and it was her. I almost wanted to scream. I was beyond frustrated. Didn’t she get the point? I just wanted to hang out by myself. I needed to relax. I didn’t want to talk about anything. A part of me was still dealing with my feelings for Kade. Though I’d tried to push him out of my mind for the past couple months, I’d turn on the TV and, bam, he’d be there, ranked as the state’s number-one defensive football athlete. When he was interviewed I could see by his demeanorand his eyes that he really wasn’t happy, and I knew it wasn’t about him not being with me, he just seemed tired of all the press. I contemplated calling him.

  At my door, Sirena said, “Give me one reason why we can’t go out for a bite. You say you don’t have a boyfriend.You said you’re not in any groups or anything. Your car is always here. If it’s money, don’t worry, I’m taking you out.”

  I hated to burst her bubble, but money was something I didn’t need. My dad sent me a monthly check, and every month I had so much money left over my bank account was ridiculous.

  I started holding back my smile when I saw Kade walkingup my steps. Sirena couldn’t see him because she was looking directly at me.

  “Good, so you’re going to go. It’s not like you have any other plans tonight. Perfect.”

  “No, she actually does have plans,” the husky and warm voice said behind her.

  She turned. “Who is this guy?”

  I didn’t want to say he was a boyfriend, because he certainly wasn’t that. I didn’t even know if I could call him my friend because last time we’d parted ways I’d told him I didn’t want to see him again.

  “He’s my brother’s friend,” I said, as if I had no interest.

  “Oh? Where’s your brother?” She looked around Kade.

  Kade looked at her, shrugged his shoulders, and asked if he could come in.

  “Sirena, I’ll see you later, okay?”

  “You gonna talk to him? You gonna go out with this guy, but I been asking you to hang out for days?”

  I whispered, “Maybe another time, all right?”

  I grabbed Kade’s hand, pulled him inside, and shut the door.

  He teased, “That girl is creepy.”

  “She’s harmless. What are you doing here? You’re the creepy one, showing up unannounced.”

  “I twisted your brother’s arm, and he told me where you live.”

  “Okay, now you know. Now you see me. Now you can go.”

  “Come on, Malloy, please don’t be like that,” he said as he came over to me and pulled out a small box with a bow around it. “I just want to tell you I haven’t been able to get over you. I care for you so much, and when I’m out there on the football field, all I keep thinking about is you. I know I dogged you out... .”

  “Kade, I can’t hear any of this, I ...” But before I could finish, he pulled me to him and kissed me passionately.His tongue and his lips felt so good.

  He pulled away and said, “There is no more sharing. I want it to be only you. Can we try?”

  “Do you really like me that much?” I asked, and he nodded. “Why?”

  He held me so close, and it felt so right. My heart started racing when he said, “Just because.”

  5

  GUT

  “I can’t seem to shake the thought of you, Malloy. And I wish I could tell you in person how my dream went that had you in it,” Kade said into the receiver.

  “Oh, see, now you are a hot mess,” I s
aid to the phone, as I rolled around in my covers, wishing he were beside me.

  We’d been dating for a couple weeks, and most of it had been over the phone because of his intense football scheduleand the start of school for me. But I was getting to know him pretty well. Although he had told me several times how special I was to him, I never said it back, and I had a feeling I was starting to fall hard for him. I would be devastated if he hurt me again.

  “Okay, so you’re quiet, Malloy. What’s up today? You know I believe you can accomplish anything.”

  “Look at you, being a great boyfriend. I’m cool. How was football practice today?”

  “It’s good, just more intense with our first big game this weekend.”

  “You’ll do fine, and I’ll be there with my folks, cheeringMikey on.”

  “Oh, so you’re just coming up to see Mike play?” he asked in an offended tone.

  Playing with him, I said, “Well, you didn’t invite me.”

  “I thought that was understood. Of course I’d want my girl there.”

  Seriously, I said, “I’m not trying to come to this game and have all these other women come out of nowhere claiming you’re theirs. Been there, done that, Kade. I’m not trying to put any pressure on you.”

  “I’m a show-off. I like playing for an audience, and I especially like showing off if my girl is in the stands. Plus, I played that other game before with you and lost once. Not making that mistake again, baby. I just need you here. Besides, I want to see you after the game. The team will throw a big party. We’ll get a victory. Then you’ll see—I’m going to let the world know you’re mine.”

  He was saying all the right things. Our relationship was under wraps, and I was trying to trust him. He said he trusted me as well, which made me glad he recognized he wasn’t the only dude I could put on lockdown.

  “Okay, so you’re quiet again. What’s going on with you, Malloy?”

  “I’m just speechless. You’re acting too right. And the Beta Gamma Pi rush is tonight. I’m just debating whether or not I even need to show up.”