by A. m Madden
I’m wrapped in an afghan and wearing mismatched pajamas. My dirty hair is in a messy ponytail, bags are under my eyes and I haven’t shaved my legs or showered in two days.
“Go away. I look like crap.” Actually, I just insulted crap. I really prefer he didn’t see me like this.
“No…open up.”
“No.”
“Leila…”
“Leila…”
“Really? Open the damn door.”
I huff and puff yet slowly open the door a tiny crack.
“Hey Rudolph.” He teases.
“Funny. I told you to stay away, you’ll get sick.”
“Planning on making out with me?”
Wait…what?
“Uh, no…”
“Then how would I get sick? I came to make sure you are getting better.” He pushes his way in, and carries two bags into my kitchen.
“What’s that?”
“Medicine and soup.” He begins pulling item after item out of the bags and lines them up on my counter.
“Medicine and soup for a small village?”
“Cute. You’re needed back healthy and in singing condition.”
“So you’re concerned about the recording schedule and not with my well-being?”
Jack stops in his tracks looking highly insulted. “No. Is that what you think?”
“I’m kidding.”
“Leila, I don’t care about the album right now.”
“I know.” Jeez, he’s so sensitive.
I feel bad about hurting his feelings and allow Jack to play nurse for hours. I let him feed me, medicate me, and fill me in on what I missed at the studio. He really is a very good nurse who also happens to be very easy on the eyes.
The soup is absolutely delicious. I inhale the entire bowl without stopping and look up to see him scowling at me.
“What?”
“When was the last time you ate?”
“Does Nyquil count?”
“Ha, ha.”
“I don’t remember. The soup was really good. Where did you get it?”
“My mom made it.”
“Shut up!”
“She dropped it off this morning.”
“Jack, please tell me you didn’t ask her to make me soup.”
“I didn’t. She did it all on her own.”
“Oh my god…that is so nice…and so embarrassing.”
“Why? That’s my mom. Get used to it.”
I can’t believe he told his mom I was sick.
I can’t believe Jack’s mom made me soup.
I can’t believe he drove it all the way to Hoboken.
The Lair family can’t be real. Gorgeous…generous…caring…it’s all too good to be true.
I’ve been trying to convince myself what I feel for Jack is just a mad crush. Sitting here having Jack take care of me, seeing me at my worst, and killing me with his kindness, makes me realize I’ve been delusional and in denial.
It’s not just a crush.
I am falling for him, hard and I haven’t a clue how I’m going to handle this because Jack and I cannot be a together. I can predict what people would say - his back-up singer fucked him to get her dream job. It doesn’t matter that I already got the job. That’s a small detail that would be ignored. I may as well flush my career down the toilet.
Jack senses my discomfort.
“You ok?”
“Yep, just tired.”
To change the subject, he announces, “The guys miss you. They claim I’m a bitch when you aren’t around.”
Laughing at his admission I ask, “Are you?”
“No comment.”
“Tell them I’ll be back soon to keep you in line.”
“Good.” Watching me closely he adds, “I miss you too.”
The familiar buzz I feel when our eyes lock takes hold of my body. For the first time in days I don’t feel chilled to the bone. I feel very warm. My lower half shows signs of life and I feel my heart pounding in my chest. My palms are clammy too. My eyes, my heart, my crotch, my body all don’t care what would happen if Jack and I got together. They all want him. My resolve is wearing extremely thin and stretched to its absolute limit right now.
Having Jack in my apartment as I’m having this life-altering awareness while under the influence of cold medicine is a dangerous situation.
My brain is the only logical one at this party. It controls my mouth.
“You can go now. I’m really tired.” I lie through my teeth.
“Kicking me out?”
With a nod, I close my eyes and pretend that exhaustion hits from the cold medicine. “You are a good nurse. Thank you.”
I carefully measure my breathing, as I drift into a fake sleep. I wait as Jack places everything I need within arm’s reach.
“Sleep tight pretty girl.” The feel of warm lips on my forehead nearly blows my cover but I continue my even breathing and continue with my charades.
Jack leaves me bundled and cozy on the couch before he quietly exits my apartment. It isn’t long before actual sleep does take over.
The bright sunlight wakes me the next morning. Amazingly, I feel better having gotten a restful night of sleep filled with dreams of Jack. We were married and he was taking care of our sick daughter. It was so real and so beautiful and I’m so screwed.
Stretching lazily, my phone buzzes with a new text that puts a grin on my face.
hey pretty girl…hope u feel better…call me when u r up.
So screwed!
***
When I finally got back in the studio, I had to pretend I wasn’t at all affected. Let me tell you it’s not easy being around someone you love and pretend you don’t. Every word, action and facial expression has to be carefully controlled. It’s fucking hard as hell and it’s exhausting.
I also had to endure endless ribbing from the guys.
“He likes you better. I could lose an arm in a shark attack, and I’d still have to play drums.”
“Welcome back, Leila. While you were gone we changed our name to Leila’s Lair.”
“So glad you’re back. We really need to pee and he won’t let us.”
“He was mean to us.”
“He threw out my Fruit Loops.”
I’m surrounded by comedians.
Back at The Zone, I now have to endure the reality of being replaced. Lori assures me that Cliffhangers is close to finding a replacement, which means that I will no longer have to work two jobs at once. “You’re run down. That’s why you got sick. We should have you replaced in no time.”
“I got a cold. Happens every day to millions of people. Stop being so dramatic.”
“Pifft.”
“Very attractive Lor.”
“Pifft. So Trey wants me to come to Jack’s party.” She wiggles her eyebrows and smirks.
“Really? How often do you and Trey talk?”
“Every day. Well we either text or call every day.”
“Since when? And why the hell haven’t you told me?”
“You’ve been busy. Plus I didn’t know what was going to happen so I kept it to myself. But Leila he is so hot and so sweet and I really like him. I can’t keep it in any more. I know he’s leaving soon, but I don’t care. I’ll enjoy the ride until then.” She pauses then adds. “Literally.”
“Ugh, T.M.I.”
“I told Alisa and she wanted to kill me. You know how she feels about me keeping secrets.” Based on the goofy grin, she can’t be all that upset about Alisa.
“I’m really happy for you. Of course you can come to Jack’s party with me. I already asked Evan. I worry how both of you will get the night off though.”
She stands and starts clapping. “Yay…don’t worry, I’ll handle Sal and the band. We are going to Riverside to get new outfits. No arguments.” She points a finger at me.
Crap…going to Riverside and shopping with Lori is asking for trouble. Our tastes couldn’t be more different.
“Yay.” I respond
sarcastically.
***
Evan, Lori and I decided to share a cab to Jack’s party, which is in a swanky bar in midtown called Granite. We didn’t want to worry about having a few drinks, and we all plan on enjoying ourselves tonight. I hardly ever get drunk, but I definitely need to get hammered. I should have taken a shot at home to loosen me up a bit.
Lori chose what she called the perfect party dress for me tonight. It’s a backless, mini black dress. A long silver necklace, silver peep toe pumps, and my panties complete the ensemble. Because the back of my dress is missing, I couldn’t wear a bra. This isn’t a problem since I am not very well endowed, but I feel naked…and sexy. If going braless was the worst Lori could have dished out, I’ll take it. I bought the dress without argument.
Lori has on a very short emerald green, jersey knit dress that skims her curves leaving nothing to the imagination and no doubt that she isn’t wearing panties. She paired it with hot pink patent pumps. Only Lori could pull off this outfit. Her hair is long and lose and her make-up is vamped up. She really looks hot.
She argued I didn’t have enough eye make-up on. I allowed her to dress me but there was no way I was allowing her to paint my face.
Evan is wearing a pair of black jeans and a grey button down shirt he left un-tucked. His shaggy hair is messy, he smells good and he also looks hot.
“Thanks for coming tonight.”
“My pleasure. I’m actually looking forward to it.”
Lori jumps in her seat and grabs my leg. “Lei, I forgot to tell you. I Googled this place and do you know it has a really cool roof top bar and that they hire different bands weekly to perform and there are music producers that attend frequently?”
“I had no clue. That’s awesome.”
“Yep. I can see Cliffhangers tearing this place up.” She looks past me to Evan and winks. “That’s how we convinced the guys we needed to be here tonight.”
“I was wondering how you accomplished that.”
Evan looks over at me. “Yep…research, and getting plastered. That’s our goal tonight.”
“Me too…on the getting plastered part.”
Lori looks at me like I’ve grown a third eye. “You?”
“Yes, me.”
Evan squeezes my hand. “You deserve it. We’ll make sure you get good and sauced. What shot do you want to do for your birthday?”
Panic-stricken, I pull my hand from his grip. “Evan please don’t tell anyone it’s my birthday. I don’t want them to know.”
He gives me a look and consigns, “Yeah, ok.”
Lori snorts and then covers it up with a cough. This is not good.
“What are you two up to?” I ask in all seriousness, turning my head left then right to try and figure out what they are scheming. “Please? Don’t embarrass me?”
“What? All I asked was what shot you were going to do? You’re paranoid.”
“I don’t trust you two. I should have come alone.” I mumble mostly to myself. They each look out their respective windows pretending to ignore me.
Our cab pulls up to an industrial looking building sporting a small awning with the bar’s name scribbled on it. Based on the amount of people waiting on a line that wraps around the block, this must be the place to be.
I hate the club scene. Standing in line forever in hopes that you can get in, paying twenty bucks for a watered down drink, sweating your ass off all night while constantly being hit on by sleazy guys…ugh.
Three intimidating big ass men are at the entrance looking bored out of their minds. The one holding a clipboard assesses us as we approach. Once we give our names, without a word he moves the rope aside to let us in. He leans close to Lori and whispers something in her ear, causing a smile to split her face in two. I can only imagine what he said to her. As we walk into the club, the well-organized line becomes an angry mob (minus the pitch forks). Every person is yelling or cursing at us.
“This is so fun.” Lori says as she antagonizes the crowd by smiling wide and waving.
“Ok…let’s go troublemaker. I can’t fight in these shoes.”
“Party-pooper.” She responds, only half-joking. “Wait I have an idea.” She takes a step backwards until she is visible in the doorway and yells out, “Cliffhangers.com!”
“Nice…” Evan says appreciatively.
Lori taps her temple smiling. “Always thinking.”
I have to admit, it was a brilliant move.
The elevator takes us up two flights opening to a really cool rooftop bar scene.
“Holy shit.” Evan mutters to no one in particular.
It is gorgeous, absolutely stunning.
There are clear glass awnings above allowing you to see the night sky. The side facing the elevators is a wall of glass that treats guests to a spectacular view of the Empire State Building and everything south of it. A stage adorned with instruments spreads against the wall to the left and a long glass modern bar faces the stage to the right. Scattered, tiny tables surround a large square dance floor in the center of the room and heaters run around the perimeter.
Waitresses sporting black short shorts matching vests are carrying trays of Jell-O shots, beer, and fancy girly drinks. In the corner is an unbelievable birthday cake with the band’s logo next to an impressive buffet with all sorts of hors d’oeuvres. Devil’s Lair music is being piped into the sound system. Listening to the song, I recognize my own voice. The tracks must be from rehearsals. It’s so surreal.
Lizzy thought of everything.
“Is that you?” Evan asks incredulously.
“Yeah. Can you believe it?”
“You sound awesome.”
“This deserves a toast.” Lori signals one of the Jell-O shot girls over. She grabs two off her tray and Evan grabs two more.
She thrusts one of the shots towards me “Down the hatch.”
Shaking my head, I tip back Lori’s shot. No sooner do I pull the glass away from my lips does Evan thrust his shot towards me as well. I roll my eyes and drink his too. I quickly recall my goal of getting hammered tonight and I take Evan’s other shot out of his hand and pound it back while he gawks at me.
“What? They are very yummy.” Strong too.
Lori finishes her shot and immediately takes off when she spots Trey leaving Evan and me in shock.
“She just ditched us.”
Evan laughs. “Yep.”
There are quite a few people here. Beside the band, Jen is here with an attractive man at her side. Scary Sally is chatting with other girls who look like they could be triplets, and there are rocker dudes interspersed with runway models.
Scott spots us hovering at the entrance. Waving, he drags Patti over to where we are standing. “Hey guys.” Patti pulls me into a hug immediately. She’s a very touchy, feely person, but for some reason I don’t mind it coming from her.
“Scott, how is he getting here?”
“Hunter is bringing him over. We come here a lot. Jack thinks we are all meeting to have a few drinks before we head off to a different bar. He hasn’t a clue.” Just as he says that a gorgeous girl with long, golden brown hair spots us from across the room and heads on over. She is stunning, wearing a cream colored dress and red heels.
“Scott, is this your lovely new back-up singer?” She asks smiling warmly at me.
Scott turns to look at the beauty and nods. “Lizzy, this is Leila and her friend Evan.
Guys this is Lizzy, Jack’s sister.”
Wow, she is an absolute knockout. I can see the resemblance, they have the same smile.
“Hi guys. It’s so nice to meet you.” She shakes my hand first and then goes for Evan’s.
I’ve seen Evan woo many girls during our friendship, but I never have seen him stunned into silence before. My friend is practically drooling. I recognize the look in Evan’s eyes. It’s the same one I have when looking at Jack.
“Lizzy, this place is gorgeous. You’ve done such a nice job.”
“Thank you.
I hope he likes it or I’ll kill him.” She says throwing us the most dazzling smile. Jeez, the knockout genes in this family are just unfair. Evan’s eyes slightly un-focus as he watches Lizzy. I’m sure he is experiencing the male version of crotch clenching right now. Unfortunately it’s harder for a guy to hide his crotch excitement. I hope things don’t get embarrassing for him.
Evan turns towards me but still has his eyes glued to Lizzy. “What do you want to drink?”
“White wine please.”
He offers his arm to Lizzy and says, “Can you walk me to the bar?”
Real smooth Evan.
Lizzy smiles shyly and accepts Evan’s arm. Watching them walk away arm in arm, I’m left standing with Scott and Patty. Friend number two has now ditched me as well.
Trying to make small talk, Scott fills me in on some of the things to expect on tour when Dylan interrupts. Casually dressed in jeans and a knit long sleeve black shirt, he looks very handsome.
“Hey guys. Hi Leila. How are you feeling?”
“I’m all better. How are you?”
“Glad to hear that. I’m good. I hear you guys got a lot done. Based on what I’m listening to I’d have to agree.”
“Thanks. We did accomplish a lot. We’ll be ready to start recording soon.”
“That’s impressive. Believe it or not, Jack does have amazing work ethics.” The tone of his voice contradicts the compliment he just gave Jack. That doesn’t sit well with me.
“Jack is very professional when it comes to his music.” I respond very defensively.
Dylan nods and smiles. “He is, and he’s extremely talented. I’m going to grab a drink, can I get you one?”
Maybe I imagined the sour tone in his voice.
I feel bad I jumped down his throat because he really is a nice guy.
“My friend is getting me one, but I’ll come with you.” I don’t want to be left standing alone again. Scott and Patti moved on to another group of people and both my friends have forgotten that I’m here. He puts his hand on my lower back as he guides me to the bar. The contact surprises me. Subconsciously I look around to see if anyone is watching. Across the room Jennifer and a handsome man are both talking to a beautiful older woman, and of course she is watching me like a hawk…great.
Evan brings me my wine with Lizzy at his side. “Thanks Ev. This is Dylan, our tour manager. Dylan this is my best friend and former band mate Evan.”
