Hope(less)

by Melissa Haag

  * * * *

  Sam woke me after a few hours of sleep.

  Despite Charlene’s assurances that my stay didn’t include finding a boyfriend, I still felt leery over Sam not telling me about the compatibility thing. I’d thought I could trust him, and his omission stung a little.

  I wanted to excuse it—maybe it’d slipped his mind—but it’d taken eight hours to get here. Granted, most of that time we’d talked about the progress the community had made and the customs, like pack hunts, that they no longer followed. Still, he could have mentioned that doozy. By the way, Gabby, werewolves will want you as their Mate. I paused then shook my head at the thought. Yeah, I would have reached for the door handle and tried to jump from the moving truck. Maybe, he’d made an okay call. Only time would tell.

  I got out of bed and dressed. Sam already had his bed made when I opened my door.

  We left the apartment and he led me to a large room, which he referred to as the commons, to get a bite to eat. The space served as a cafeteria and an entertainment area with sitting arrangements scattered around the room. It even had a pool table set in the back corner.

  Charlene saw us and came over to our table. Two young men followed in her wake. She introduced them as Paul and Henry. She thought I might like the opportunity to talk to people my own age. She even suggested we go into the woods so they could show me more about the werewolf way of life. Sam heard my panicked heartbeat, and before I could refuse, he suggested we use the lounge in the commons to get to know each other, instead.

  Paul and Henry didn’t treat me the same as human boys did. As curious about me as I was them, they asked a myriad of questions.

  “What’s school like?” Paul, the boy with dark hair and a carefree smile, asked while sitting on a padded dish-chair close to me.

  “You don’t go to school?” I couldn’t believe it.

  “Nah,” said Henry, a short stocky kid with bright blue eyes. “We’re home schooled here. It’s way quicker to graduate since we can study at an accelerated pace because we don’t have to break for holidays or anything.”

  “That actually sounds pretty great...what school should be, minus the no breaks part.” I cringed inwardly at the thought of school year round then answered his original question. “The majority of the teachers spend their time hating their jobs and finding ways to be as disagreeable as possible while the students look at it as a popularity contest and spend more time worrying about who’s dating who than studying,” I explained.

  “Date?” Paul glanced at Henry, who wore an equally puzzled expression. “I heard Charlene talking about that once. Sounds weird.”

  “Really? You guys don’t date?” I didn’t ask what they did to get to know a girl instead of dating.

  “No, we get invited to Introductions,” Paul said as if reading my mind.

  “What’s that?” Sam hadn’t mentioned anything like that to me, and I wondered if I should add it to his list of omissions.

  “When a female comes of age, she’s brought to the Introduction room where she can meet werewolves she has never met before. The Elders are there to make sure the girl is safe and to give the guys a few minutes to talk to her. You know, to really get her scent. When there’s a connection, a guy just knows and Claims her. If not, the next group comes in for their chance.”

  I started to sweat as I sat there. First, what did he mean by Claim? Second, they kept a girl in a room while guys came in to look her over and smell her? I reached for my water that sat on the coffee table in the center of our sitting arrangement. My hands shook a little, and I tried really hard to calm down and not let my imagination run away.

  “Hey, Gabby, you okay? Did Paul say something wrong? Charlene said we could ask any questions we wanted...”

  They had no idea how foreign what they’d just said sounded to me.

  “Hey, Gabby, you don’t have to worry about Introductions if that’s what’s scaring you.” Paul looked at me with concern. “For you and Charlene, the attraction works different. She explained it to us when she said that you were coming. You guys have a level of appeal, or chemistry, with just about all werewolves.” He is not helping, I thought while he continued. “Because the level of attraction to you varies, it wouldn’t be safe to put you in an Introduction room.”

  “Yeah,” Henry agreed and, with a spark of excitement in his eyes, leaned forward in his chair. “That’s when the mating duels happen. It’s rare with a werewolf couple, but when Charlene was first brought here, I heard the guys went crazy because they didn’t know what was happening. They fought over who had the strongest tie to her. But you don’t have to worry about that with us. Paul and I think you’re okay, and you smell good and everything, but we knew when we met you that you’re not right for either of us. That’s why Charlene left you alone with us.”

  My stomach churned. Werewolves were going to start fighting each other for me? No thanks. They both smiled at me encouragingly. They probably thought their explanations helpful, but the information they threw at me stunned me.

  “What did you mean by ‘Claim’?” My voice came out light and airy with anxiety, but I needed to know.

  “It’s when we bite our Mate. The bite draws blood but doesn’t hurt,” Paul explained reassuringly.

  “What?” I nearly shouted. My freak-o-meter bypassed meltdown. My head spun dizzily, and no doubt, all the color had drained from my face.

  “Oh, not for you, Gabby,” Paul said, quickly leaning forward. He made shushing motions with his hands. “We can’t Claim humans like that. When your Mate finds you, it’s up to you to Claim him.”

  So, I would need to bite someone? Not going to happen. It was easier to calm down now that I knew I had control. I didn’t want to be “the right one” for anyone at this point in my life. I hoped that the rest of the werewolves, like these two, would correctly use their keen sense of smell to determine my unsuitability.

  I heard the main door swing open and saw Sam walk in with an older woman and another older man. Sam nodded to me and then moved with his group to another area of the room. They sat down and started talking. Paul and Henry shifted their attention to the new people, listening. I couldn’t hear the conversation but had no doubt they could. Just as I knew Sam would hear if I asked either Paul or Henry to tell me what the group said. I decided to change the subject.

  “What about sports? I noticed there are no TVs. Do you guys play or go watch any sports?”

  “Nah, we don’t get good reception out here, and the television tends to hurt our ears, but we do like to play football. There aren’t enough of us for a team, though.”

  The door behind us opened again, and I watched two younger men, about our age, enter. They glanced our way but headed toward the group with Sam. I turned around and took another drink of water while thinking about this Mate business. According to these two, I needed to watch for a werewolf who acted as most human men would toward me, intense and weird.

  Sam startled me out of my thoughts when he spoke next to me.

  “Gabby, I’d like you to meet Eric and Derrick. They are the twin sons of a couple who lives here. They’re home from college and have to leave again tomorrow.”

  I smiled and said hello. They both nodded to me but didn’t speak. Awkward.

  Uncomfortable, I looked back at Sam, who nodded at the two. They turned and left. If they represented the normal reaction to me, I needed to watch out for someone even more intense and weird. Maybe I just needed a plan to avoid them all.

  Sam waited until they’d walked out of the room to explain.

  “I want you to get to know the people who live here. In summer, we’ll spend a lot of our weekends here.” He looked at Paul and Henry. “You two keep an eye on her. I’m counting on you to help explain our ways.”

  Sam walked back to the group, and I looked from Paul to Henry with an arched eyebrow. Was it just me or did that fe
el weird? I wanted to ask but remained quiet. There were still too many ears to overhear. They seemed to understand my unspoken question and both shrugged in return.

  Sam interrupted our conversation twice more, each time bringing someone to introduce to me. My mind caught on the word “introduce.”

  Paul and Henry’s assurance that I would never face the Introduction room clicked everything into place. Sam had started slowly introducing me to the eligible male population of this little community right here, right now—in this room. After the third set left, I caught Sam’s eye.

  “Sam, would you mind showing me around outside for a bit?” I stood and made my way to the main door, not waiting to see if Sam followed. After three months, I’d felt sure enough of Sam that I’d risked a trip to an unknown destination with him, alone. I’d been willing to explain away the little doozy he didn’t mention on the way here; but now, his actions and omissions devastated my confidence in him.

  Already familiar with the layout of the Compound, I didn’t hesitate to walk out the front door and stride purposefully toward the dirt lane. Sam didn’t take long to catch up to me. If I told him I wanted to go back to the Newton’s now, would he take me? If he did, then what? I couldn’t stay there forever.

  “Sam,” I said when we walked side by side. “I don’t want to be on the streets, but that’s where I’ll go if you think you can pull this crap if I move in with you.” I didn’t look at him; I was too angry. And scared. “I understand the condition of living at your place is that we come up here. But my condition is that you have to be completely honest about our purpose in coming up here. Each time,” I stressed. “I don’t know if I can trust you.”

  “I’m sorry, Gabby. You can trust me. I have your best interests in mind. This is another one of those things that is easier to believe when you experience it firsthand.” He kept pace next to me as I led us further from the Compound.

  “No, Sam. You need to lay it out for me straight.”

  He stayed quiet for a few minutes, and I wasn’t sure he had anything to say until he actually spoke.

  “Well, I heard what Paul and Henry told you. That part’s right. We do Introductions for our females in a controlled environment to keep them safe until they find their Mate.

  “We learned from Charlene’s time here that you’d need to be handled differently. I told you that werewolves would find your scent interesting. Since we’re branching out into more urban areas, it would only be a matter of time before you attracted attention. So, we wanted to control your Introduction. A formal Introduction without mass challenges was out of the question.

  “This is the compromise; they come into the commons, say ‘hello’ to you, then talk to the Elders. Because the level of attraction varies, we interview them. They must formally request permission from me to come see you again if they think of you as more than just interesting. They are not allowed to approach you while you are on your own. If they were to approach me for a second meeting, I would speak with you first before approving or denying their request.”

  The light filtering through the canopy cast the road into dusky shadow. I stopped walking and turned to Sam.

  “What you’re saying is, eventually werewolves would find me; but, if I stay with you, you’d be my buffer?” He nodded. I studied him. “And I’d only have to say hi to these guys. It’d be up to me if I wanted to spend any additional time with them?” He nodded again.

  I liked Paul and Henry. They oozed useful information and didn’t react to me at all. The others I’d already met hadn’t seemed too interested, either.

  When Paul and Henry had mentioned mating duels, I imagined drowning in a writhing mass of hostile bodies, all in various stages of transformation. I still dreamt about Sam shifting. The dreams and my fueled imagination bothered me. But since arriving, everyone had remained in human form and nothing freaky had happened. The general population of werewolves couldn’t be all bad. I just didn’t like the way I had to meet them. Yet, now that the werewolves knew I existed, trying to live on my own didn’t sound like a good idea. I’d be better off with Sam. He’d keep the others away.

  “Fine, let’s go back.”

  Paul and Henry were playing cards while they ate their way through a stack of sandwiches set out on the coffee table. They waved me over, and I gladly joined their game and grabbed a sandwich for myself.

  Several more werewolves came in throughout the day. Sam led each one to me. Most left after a polite nod of hello. A few asked for a second meeting. Each time, Sam would look at me and, at the shake of my head, reject the request. It relieved me to see him keep his word and restored some of my shaken confidence in him.

  We packed up and left Sunday morning. I mostly paid attention to the scenery since I’d missed the majority of it on the way there. While I watched the trees flash by, I thought about the weekend. None of the guys I’d met seemed too upset over any type of rejection. For as much emphasis as they’d put on my smelling good to just about all werewolves, their laid-back attitude didn’t make much sense to me.

  “Why did the guys seem okay with their second request being rejected?”

  “Although you smelled good to them, they knew it wasn’t just right. When it is, they won’t give up, which is why staying with me is so important. We have laws that control certain aspects of the social side of the pack. One is that unMated human females, like you, cannot be approached without the approval of the nearest Elder.”

  “Then, why can’t you just tell them all ‘no’ for me in advance, so we don’t have to mess with this whole Introduction thing?”

  “Because I have to give them the chance to see for themselves that it’s not right. Was it that bad? Meeting people? No one treated you the way some human men have treated you.”

  I couldn’t disagree. “How often is this going to happen?”

  “Once a month.”

  I sat up straighter. “No way.” I shook my head for emphasis. It was a cool enough place, but sixteen hours of driving in a single weekend every month would get boring. “Once every two months.”

  “Every five weeks, with flexibility to switch weeks if needed,” he said.

  “Seven weeks.”

  “Six,” he said with a sideways glance at me.

  “Fine, every six weeks,” I compromised. Then I threw in another condition. “Until I graduate. Then, I’m going to college and won’t be obligated to take time out of studying for dating—or whatever you want to call this—if I don’t want to.”

  “Deal,” he agreed.

  I stared at him. He’d agreed too easily. Was that a hint of a smile on his mouth? Why did I feel like I just got the raw end of the deal? I’d have to play my cards carefully so I didn’t find myself hitched in some weird backwoods werewolf custom.