Max never misses a trick. “Yeah, buddy.” I rub the back of my neck before rolling it. The cracking sound always makes Max gag, which makes me laugh.
“Do you gotta do that? Jesus!”
I laugh loudly. This kid means everything to me. All my siblings mean everything to me, but Max is like my little buddy. He followed me everywhere when he was a baby. Max loved Willow, but it was me he wanted to be around a lot. He seems much older than he really is. Old headed as my grandmother used to say. He'll be a good man when he's older, a better man than me.
“Seriously, though, do you think you'll ever get to be in your kid's life?”
“If I have anything to do with it.” I won't give up. I can't give up. The love I feel for something that isn't even here yet is out of this world. My whole heart is full.
“You won't do anything stupid, will you?” I turn my head to look at him. He pushes her long hair out of his eyes. “I know how much it must hurt being pushed out of your baby's life, but please don't do anything that will get you killed. I need you, Jett.”
I grab the back of his neck and bring him toward me. I kiss his head and let him go. “I'm not going anywhere, Max. You're too young to understand what's going on, but I can't walk away from my child.”
“Or their mother?”
I sigh before taking a chug of my beer. I hang my head as I swallow. “I don't know what to tell you, Max.”
“The truth.” The truth. I don't even know what that is myself right now. “Everyone and his dog thinks you're doing this because you have something to prove. That you want Maria because you can't have her.”
“Do they now.” It's not a question. Fuckin' assholes don't think much of me. Then again, I never gave them a reason in the past to think I could be serious about any woman. However, I'm damn serious about Maria and our baby.
“It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, Jett. I know you have feelings for her. If you didn't, you wouldn't be sitting out here alone thinking about her. Thinking of way you can be together. It's not just for the baby; it's because you've fallen for her. That's why you really sneak over the wall of the Vidal's compound.”
“It's not a compound.” I laugh.
“Whatever it is. My point is, baby or not there's no way you're reckless enough to risk your life just to sleep with Maria now and again.” I almost choke on my damn beer! What the hell? “I know you're not that stupid, Jett. You wouldn't leave us like that. Maria means something to you. She's in your heart, and you don't know yet how to deal with it.”
“Got all worked our, huh, little brother?”
He smirks at me while nodding his head. “I know you, Jett. I know nothing anyone says will stop you trying to be with Maria. Just be careful, okay? Remember that you have a big family who loves you, a family who needs you. We're all here for you, Jett. We always will be.”
This fuckin' kid talks too much sense for a child. He also knows how to pull on my heartstrings. “Don't worry, Max, nothing is going to happen to me. I promise.”
“You shouldn't make promises you can't keep.”
I roll my eyes.
I love VJ, but he's not yet learned the concept of sparing other peoples feelings. He'll out you even for a little white lie, then repeatedly question why you'd do such a thing in the first place.
VJ is already almost six-feet tall, already gaining muscle. He's a lot like I was at his age. He's a Jackson all right.
He drops down on the grass, his knees against his chest, arms around them. He's watching us with fascination. Dark blue eyes looking back at two sets of sky blue eyes. Dad swears blind that VJ's eye color reflects the monster within him. Each one of us, apart from Sophie and Willow, have light blue eyes like our father. Sophie's are green like Mom's, and Willow's are hazel like our grandmothers.
Then there's VJ. Dark blue eyes, a sinister smile, and evil on his mind. This boy will hurt you in any way he sees fit, and he'll think nothing of it. He'll get away with it too because he's just that damn smart. It isn't normal for a kid who isn't even fifteen to know how to get away with evil deeds.
Roman always laughs and tell us how VJ will be a great asset to the club when he's of age. Dad disagrees and swears blind the kid could be our downfall. If Dad has his way, VJ will never be a Snakes Henchmen.
I can see both sides of the coin. Either VJ will be the craziest, most loyal biker out there, or he'll get himself, and the rest of us killed.
I guess we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
“Why don't you just take off with her? Get a hacker to tap into Vidal's security system and knock out the CCTV. Sneak into his house while everyone is asleep, end Vidal, take your girl.” He shrugs like what he's just said is perfectly normal for a kid of his age.
“Don't be so stupid!” I hiss in anger. I don't want him thinking things like that, let alone saying them! “There are bigger factors involved, and I'm not talking about any of them with my little brothers!”
“You need to lighten up. Go sneak over that wall and fuck your girl before her husband gets his hands on her.”
I fist my hands so tightly the knuckles pop from the force of it. I would never hit my little brother, he's a kid, but he's a tactless little cunt. “You watch your damn mouth, boy. Don't push it, VJ.”
“I'll say whatever the hell I want. While you're sitting here drinking beer and talking to Max about how you want to stay in your kid's life, Maria is in her room counting the seconds until she marries some other asshole. Either do something about it or let it go. Either way, you're turning into a jerk.”
“Why you little...”
“VJ!”
I'm fuming. I've never wanted to punch the little shit as much as I do right now! I watch the little fucker smirking at me, ignoring Dad, who must have come out just in time to hear what VJ just said. He's pushing my buttons, trying to see how far he can go before I snap. This is what he does. This is how he gets his kicks. Not with me, he won't.
I get out of my seat, toss my bottle of beer in the trash, and leave. I don't say anything to anyone. I just need to get out of here. There really is something fuckin' wrong with me if my little brother has the ability to get to me like this.
What the fuck is happening to me?
I feel like I'm going insane. I need to speak with Vidal. I need to appeal to him in any way I can. How will I get near him?
I guess Hammer is my only hope.
“I've never asked you for a thing in my life, but I'm asking you now. Help me, Hammer. Help me stop this wedding.”
Hammer raises his eyebrow at me from his seat at his dining table. I knew I'd find him at home. Willow has been a little unwell the past couple days, and Hammer has been taking care of her. I got here ten minutes ago and went straight in with what I needed from him.
“What makes you think I want my sister with you?”
“I know you pretend not to give a damn about her, Hammer, but you're not that fuckin' heartless. She's terrified. She doesn't want to marry this guy. I'm not saying I'm the best man for her, but she'd be safe with me. She'd be happy. So would our baby. Are you honestly going to sit back and allow another man to raise my kid? To let Draven push me out or even kill me to keep me away from her?”
Hammer shifts in his seat, eyes narrow as he stares me down. He's not saying anything. I'm fuckin' desperate here! Hammer is my last hope. I can't go to Vidal myself because he'd never see me. He'd have me killed before I got through the damn gates. Even if I snuck in through Maria's window, he'd kill me. He's just the kind of bastard who'd make her watch too.
“I don't know what you expect me to do, Jett. You think I haven't spoken to Draven about this? I have. Plenty. Nothing will change his mind about this.”
“Whatever you did to make him let Ghost go, to let him and Avery be together, do that. Do anything!”
He pulls in a deep breath. “It won't work, Jett. This isn't like Ghost and Avery. You went after Maria knowing whom she was, knowing the hell Ghost went through, an
d you didn't care, and why didn't you? Because you thought with your dick as always.”
“Fuck you, Hammer!” He's right though, I did think with my dick. I saw her, wanted her, had her. I didn't think of the consequences, all I thought about was fucking her all night long. She was so beautiful that I couldn't help myself. I didn't even think about what it would mean for Maria if anybody found out she'd been with me.
I'm an awful person. I know I am. However, do I really deserve to be cut out like this?
Maria is a good person, a sweet, strong woman who doesn't deserve to be forced into a loveless marriage because of me, and this is because of me. No, I didn't hold a gun to her head and force her to come with me that night. She wanted me as much as I wanted her. However, the fact remains, I should never have so much as stood beside her.
I could have chosen any woman there that night; it didn't have to be Maria. However, I'd be a fucking liar if I said she wasn't the most beautiful woman there that night. That smile of hers, and the way she smelled drew me in, and I was hooked.
“No, fuck you, Jett! You think I want to see my sister married to a man I know is no good for her?”
“Don't even pretend like you give a fuck about her, Hammer. You've done nothing but push her away and treat her like shit since the day you met her!”
We're both out of our seats so fast I don't know who got to their feet first. We stare each other down, nostrils flaring, anger rising. The last thing I want is to fight with this man in his own home, but I won't be lied to! He doesn't care about Maria. He's probably bending Draven's ear to make sure he follows through with this fuckin' wedding!
“What the hell is going on in here? Noah's in the house!”
My sister is right; there's a baby in the house. I would never do anything to scare him, but I'm angry, I feel backed into a corner. There's nothing I can do to stop this wedding, and it's killing me.
I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I can feel my heart crushing inside my chest, and I don't like the feeling one little bit.
“I'm sorry, you're right.” I smile at Willow. “I shouldn't have come. I'll go now.”
“Wait,” She takes my arm. “I know you're hurting, but don't think for one-second Hammer isn't on your side. We all are.”
Whatever she says.
“Stay away from Maria, Jett. Don't go sneaking over there to see her again,” Is there anyone that doesn't know what I've been doing? “It'll only be a matter of time before Draven finds out. When he does, nothing anyone does will save you.”
I kiss my sister's cheek and leave. I can't deal with anymore tonight. That's why I ignore Hammer and whatever it is he's saying right now. I need to go get fuckin' drunk. So drunk I forget Maria Vidal and the fact she'll never be mine, or that I'll never so much as kiss my own child's head.
Then when I wake up tomorrow, I'll try again to make someone listen to me, to help me put a stop to this madness. If that doesn't work, then... I have no fuckin' idea where I'll go from there.
Don't give up, Jett. Remember what Apollo taught you. Never give up. Only losers and pussy’s give up. You're a Snakes Henchmen, and a Snake never gives up!
Giving up is not in my blood, and not seeing Maria is not an option. I have to be near her. I'll do whatever it takes to make that happen. I crave her like a junkie craving smack.
God help me.
Chapter Ten
Draven
I've heard it all before, Hammer.”
“You may have heard it, but I don't think you heard it, brother.”
“Are we really doing this again, Sam?”
This is the second time my brother has interfered in the decisions I have made concerning the women in my life, first Avery, now Maria. Yes, he was right when it came to Avery, but the girl was in love with a filthy biker and tried to take her own life. I would have done anything to make sure that never happened again. Maria isn't in love with Jett. She made a mistake... One I can't bear to even think about. She's pregnant and needs a husband. I found her one. Just not the one she says she thinks she wants.
I know what's best for Maria. No one would dare tell me I'm wrong, no one but this man in front of me. He barged into my home office yet again to give me a piece of his mind. For some odd reason, he seems to think he can tell me what to do where Maria is concerned.
He may be her brother, but I raised that girl, no one knows what's best for her but me!
“Yes, we're doing this again, Draven! Don't do this to her. I know what she means to you. The whole damn state knows, and I know you only want the best for her. However, do you honestly, in your heart of hearts, believe this is what's best for her?”
I roll my neck and shift in my leather seat behind my desk. I don't usually allow people in my home office; this is my private room. The place I throw around ideas, reasons for why I need to dispose of certain wastes of space. This is the room I come to get away from the stress of being the Don, even if it's just for half an hour.
“She's miserable, Draven. Any idiot can see that. They're in love, and no matter what you say or do it will never change that fact.”
“Love.” I scoff. They don't love each other; they don't even know each other. One night together does not constitute love.
“Don't do that, Draven. You know full well that he's been sneaking into your house to be with her, and you did nothing to stop it.” I grit my teeth. I do know this. I know everything. “You think that was wise? You didn't think it would just have her falling deeper in love with him?”
I don't know what the fuck I was thinking, I've been too busy covering up her pregnancy, sorting this wedding, and making sure my men keep their goddamn mouths shut. Just one let's slip even half a word, and I'll kill the cunt!
“When was the last time you saw her smile, Draven?”
I haven't seen Maria smile in weeks. Not even a slight smile. It hasn't escaped my notice how much weight she's losing either, and even I know that's not right in her condition. I mentioned it to her doctor at her last appointment. She merely told me that stress can cause weight loss, that it's not healthy and could cause Maria to miscarry. Then she told me to keep an eye on Maria and to take her back if she losses any more weight, or even feels sick.
I should have taken her before now, but with everything we've had to sort out for this wedding, I haven't had the time to scratch my head. That was so fucking wrong. Never in my life, have I put anything before Maria's health.
When you do the job, I do it's more than just a job it's a way of life. Many people depend on me. I can take your life from you in less than a second. I can allow you to keep it just as quickly. I think nothing of killing those who get in my way. I don't care who you are, if you cross me, you die.
So why the fuck is that filthy biker scum still alive?
Something in the way Maria begged me not to hurt him, the way she looked at me, those tears falling from her eyes. I'll never forget that look for as long as I live.
I told myself there's no way she could be in love with that jumped up motherfucker. He's cocky, arrogant, thinks he's God's fucking gift, and probably fucks more women than I do. How the hell could a man like that be good for my sister? He'd end up cheating on her left and right. She'd come to me in tears, and I'd end up ripping his fucking throat out with my bare hands!
Yet I've been allowing him to sneak into my house to see her, and I've done nothing to stop him. I must be losing my mind!
“He's got rights, Dray. That baby is of is blood. I know how you feel about people like me, and I know what you've threatened, but do you honestly think, unless you actually kill him and risk losing Maria for good, that he'll just go about his life and not kick up a fuss?”
“Don't preach to me, Sam. I've made up my mind.”
“Then I'll do what I can to make sure Jett stays away from Maria.”
“Good.”
“You listened to me when it came to Ghost. When I told you that deep down he was a good man, you listened for Avery's sake
. Jett is a good man, Draven. He's as cocky as you think he is, but I know deep in here,” He thumps his chest over his heart. “That no one could love that girl as much as Jett does. It's fuckin' odd for me to say that. I never thought Jett would ever fall in love, but he's fuckin' miserable without Maria.”
“More like he's pissed that he won't be coming near her or that kid after tomorrow.”
“You're a fuckin' asshole, Dray!” I run my tongue over my teeth to stop the smirk trying to break my lips. I've been called worse, people have died for less. However, it always makes me smile when my brother talks to me like this. He challenges me, he isn’t afraid of me at all, which is how it should be, I am his brother, after all. “You are not God! Don't fuckin' do this to Maria. I'm not asking you to give a shit about Jett, he's a big guy and doesn't give a shit what you or anyone else thinks of him, but he loves Maria and their baby. I've seen how sad she looks. It ain't right.”
“Why do you even care, Hammer? You've never had anything to do with her! You think I don't know how you treat her?” His eyes widen with anger. This can't come as a shock to him. Nothing happens around here without me knowing about it. “You think I don't know how you won't even let her hold your son? The son you have no problem with me holding?”
“I have my reasons for keeping her at arm's length, Draven. Women tend to get killed around me, or haven't you noticed? However, this isn't about me, this is about Maria and her happiness. If you really care about her the way you say you do, then give her what she wants. Don't force her into something we'll all regret in the not too distant future.”
I don't need this right now. I've got a speech to perfect. My little sister is getting married tomorrow. I'm walking her down the aisle, and I'll be damn proud to do so. No matter the reason she has to do this.
My brother gets out of his set, ready to leave. “Whatever you decide to do, no matter what I say, you'll do it anyway. I just hope you make the right choice for Maria and her baby's sake.”
No one would ever get away with speaking to me like this usually. I would have killed this man without even thinking twice about it before he got the second word out of his mouth. Trust me; I want to blow my brothers head off right now! However, I know he's only thinking of Maria and her future. The life she will have to lead after tomorrow.
Never Give You Up (Snakes Henchmen Book 3) Page 8
