“Hello, Miss Wilson?”
“Yes, this is Miss Wilson.”
“Casper Stephens. I was wondering if you could meet me sometime today.”
Envy stepped up the pace until she reached her car. She clicked the remote to open the door and climbed inside quickly.
“What is it? Can’t you tell me on the phone?” she asked.
“No, I prefer to talk to you in person. Do you have any time today?”
“Well, I’m on the way to my office. I had an outside appointment this morning. I have some projects that really need my attention. They should take a few hours to complete. I can meet you after work, say around five-thirty?”
“Five-thirty sounds fine. We can meet at my office, or if you’d like, I’d be glad to do a dinner meeting.” He took a chance and laid it on the table. He wanted to see more of her outside of his office. A dinner meeting would be the chance he hoped would open the door for him to get a little closer to the mysterious Envy Wilson. After learning about her past, and seeing the woman she was today, he couldn’t help but be intrigued by her. It took a woman of courage and great strength to open a cold case where she was the missing link to solving it. For that, he admired her. She was ready to face whatever the outcome would be. She was special in his book.
“Dinner? Umm, well, that’ll be fine. Any particular place you have in mind.”
Since you live in Midtown and I work downtown, I think it’ll be easier on the both of us if we met somewhere in between. There are several fine eating establishments. There’s Soul Catfish Café on Cooper; Huey’s and Boscos both on Madison; Sekisui, on Belvedere; the Cupboard on Union . . . .”
“What about Sekisui? I haven’t had their famous sushi rolls in a while.”
With a certain alarming thrill, Casper Stephens said, “Sekisui, it is then. I’ll see you at five-thirty.”
“I look forward to it,” responded Envy.
Envy drove back to the office with a mixture of emotions. What if Casper had terrible news? What if he was going to tell her that she had to turn herself in to law enforcement, and be locked behind bars in a cell for the rest of her life? Casper sounded hopeful, but maybe she had read him wrong. It was hard to tell what a person was thinking while talking on the phone. She felt dismayed at the prospect of everyone finding out how wretched she was—that she was a child murderer.
14
Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.
Envy spent the afternoon at the office working like a lunatic. When her assistant, Bobbie, asked questions about some of the projects they were working on together, Envy’s words were spiced with irritation. She wanted to get everything done, so she could get out of there. Her face tightened and she felt like she was in the middle of the nightmare she always feared would come true.
A flurry of second thoughts saturated her already cluttered mind. She never felt loved by her mother. Her father had deserted her. The only love she felt was love at a distance, never giving in to it, or allowing it to approach her. But sleeping with man after man was something she was able to control. She was the one who kept herself from being hurt. But the trauma she had experienced all those years ago never left her. She never smoked before, but now she thought if she had a cigarette, it would help calm her down.
“Miss Wilson?” Her assistant’s voice invaded her thoughts.
“What is it, Bobbie?” Her tension level rose a few points.
“I need your signature on these reports.” She passed three coiled booklets to her. “Once you sign them, I can finish the rest of the projects and enter them into the database.” She seemed to sense that something was not quite right with her boss.
“Give them here,” Envy said in a bitter tone. “All I want to do is get this stuff done so I can get out of here. I have somewhere else to be that’s far more important than being stuck here in this office.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Envy signed the reports and immediately gathered her coat, purse, phone, and keys.
“Send all of my calls to my voice mail, unless it’s something you can handle. If anyone asks where I am, tell them I had an emergency.” Envy pulled open the door to her office. “Shut down my computer before you leave this afternoon, and do not,” she emphasized, “do not call me. Whatever it is can wait until tomorrow.”
“Yes, Miss Wilson.”
Envy, highly frustrated and worried, stormed out of the office, down the hallway, and to the elevator. She pushed the button repeatedly, until she became frustrated when it didn’t come quickly enough, so she ran down the flights of stairs leading from the eighth floor to the garage.
She looked at her watch. It was four-fifteen, still too early to meet with Casper Stephens. What could she do? She drove aimlessly around downtown until she suddenly spotted the massive Catholic Church, built with Victorian-era elegance, and pulled up in front of it. Their doors remained unlocked for prayer. She remotely locked her car and hurried inside. Once inside, the setting sun’s light sprawled over the ceilings. She felt dwarfed by the opulent, plaster-relief ceilings.
Envy continued to take careful, quiet steps farther into the overwhelming sanctuary so as not to disturb others she saw kneeling at the altar or sitting on various pews in meditation. She took a seat midway the cathedral and loosened her taupe-and-ivory coat, revealing her sooty gray pantsuit jacket and the warm onyx-colored pullover she wore underneath. She leaned forward and rested both hands in praying style on the pew in front of her and made her petitions known before God.
Whatever she was about to hear from Casper Stephens would determine where the rest of her life was headed. Her heart began to beat profoundly. Lord, I’m terrified. I need your help. Give me strength to endure whatever it is I’m about to face. Envy remained in the church praying and thinking about what Casper had to discuss. It was after five when she looked at the time on her cell phone. Now she had to hurry to get to Sekisui on time.
~
While he sat at Sekisui and waited on Envy, Casper Stephens studied the thin folder of scant information he’d recovered from the Cold Case Investigations Unit Evidence Room. It was five-forty. She told him she had some things to finish up at work, so he blamed her tardiness on that. He nursed a glass of water with lemon as he waited for her arrival. He looked at the timepiece on his left wrist, and before his eyes could deflect toward the door, the sound of her voice gave him cause to look up. He cleared his throat, stood up, and greeted her.
“Hello, Envy,” he said, and extended his hand in the direction of the empty seat across from him.
“Hello, Attorney Stephens. I’m sorry that I’m running late. I left work in plenty of time,” she said as he pulled out the seat for her, “but I made a stop and then ended up getting caught in five o’clock traffic.”
“No problem. You’re my last appointment. And while I was waiting, I had a chance to go over your file some more.”
Envy looked flushed. “I don’t know what to say behind that. Should I be glad or sad?” she inquired.
“Before we discuss anything further, why don’t you look at the menu and let me know what you would like to eat.”
“I’m not really hungry. All I want is something to drink. They have great sweet tea here. That’ll be all for me.”
“But I thought you wanted to dine on their famous sushi rolls?” His eyebrows raised in an inquisitive manner; then he smiled.
“I did, but I’m afraid I’m so nervous that I’ve lost my appetite.”
“I hope it’s not on account of me.”
The server appeared before she could respond. “Hello, my name is Jason. I’ll be your server this evening. May I interest you in our two-for-one house hot sake and an appetizer?”
Casper looked at Envy. She shook her head.
“No, thank you. But the lady will have a glass of sweet tea with lemon.”
“And for you, sir?”
“I’d like a small bottle of hot sake and, um, the nigiri sushi,” Casper said, and closed the
menu. “Are you sure you don’t want an appetizer or a salad, or something?” he asked Envy.
“No. Really, I’m fine. Thank you.”
“That will be all,” Casper told the server.
“Thank you, sir. I will be back shortly with your order, sir, and your tea, ma’am.”
Casper nodded. After the server left, he opened the file folder. “Did you say something?”
She shook her head. “No.”
“Well, let’s get to your case. I did quite a bit of research through the Cold Case files for information involving your child.”
“And?” She looked at him with raised eyebrows.
“And,” he replied. “I located the file.”
The server returned promptly with a glass of tea, with a slice of lemon wedged around the glass, along with the bottle of hot sake.
“Thank you,” Envy and Casper said.
“I guess I should be glad, but I can’t say how I feel.” Envy looked at him. Her face was almost crimson. She removed her eyeglasses and fidgeted with them.
“That’s understandable. It’s been eighteen years since the unthinkable happened. You were a teenager. I can’t imagine the torment you went through back then.” Casper took a swallow of his sake. “I keep thinking about the courage it took for you to rehash such a painful part of your past.” He looked at her with empathy. If he had been in a different place in his life, he would have tried to holler at her, perhaps make something happen between the two of them. But his life was too full of his own personal problems, not to mention a thriving, but draining, law practice.
“Like I told you, there was no way I could expect my life to get better until I closed the door to my past. But before I can close it, I have to open it.”
“I understand where you’re coming from.”
“Good, I’m glad you don’t look down on me.”
Casper studied her. She appeared rigid and troubled. He did not want to keep her in suspense any longer.
For the second time, the server approached the table before Casper could respond. “Your order, sir.” The server set the plate of food in front of Casper, and then reached for a pitcher of tea and refilled Envy’s nearly empty glass.
“Thank you,” Casper said, and the server retreated. Casper patted the folder resting next to his plate of food. He blessed his food quickly, took a bite, and paused long enough to chew and swallow it. “Um, this is good. Are you sure you don’t want anything?”
“Yes, I’m sure. I just want to know how long I’m going to be in jail.”
Casper picked up a napkin and wiped his mouth. “I think it’s highly unlikely that you’ll be going to jail. Let me show you what I found.”
Casper pushed his plate of food to the side and placed the folder in front of him. He removed the old newspaper clipping from the file and placed it in front of Envy. Instantly, he saw tears form in her brown eyes. His heart turned even softer for the beautiful woman sitting before him.
“Please understand, I get no pleasure in showing you this. I’m sure it brings up terrible memories for you. But I need to show you everything that is in the file.”
Envy nodded. “I understand.”
Search Continues For Mother of Newborn Left in School Lavatory
Memphis, TN (Memphis Commercial Appeal). The body of an infant, said to have been only hours old, has been found under shocking circumstances. The baby’s lifeless body was discovered in the toilet by one of the janitorial staff at Germanside High School. Police state the body appears to have been in the second-floor bathroom toilet for as long as five hours. Homicide detective Monica Bell said the newborn girl was well developed and was more than likely full-term. A postmortem examination of the newborn will be done to determine the cause of death. “One of the major concerns now is to locate the mother of the infant,” states Bell. “We are concerned about her health physically and psychologically.” Detective Bell further states, “Everything is being done to locate the mother. We urge anyone who has information that will lead us to the mother to contact 555-TIPS. We are also pleading with the mother to contact police right away.”
“You’re right. It is hard to read.” Envy breathed an exasperated sigh. “Though I’ve read it over and over in my mind for all these years, it’s still nothing like seeing it in print again.” She appeared to quiver while she read the newspaper clipping.
“Are you cold?” he asked. His tone pensive.
“No, no, I’m fine. Just nervous, on edge about all of this.”
“I understand.”
Envy pushed the clipping back to Casper and took a swallow of tea. “What else is there?”
“The police report, which I will go over with you. I think it will help you to relax a bit.”
“What does it say?”
“Even though the case was initially being investigated as a homicide, detectives stated they were looking into the possibility that the baby’s death could have been an accident.”
“Are you saying that I may not have killed my baby?”
“Yep, that’s exactly what I’m saying.” Casper scratched his forehead and left it with the makings of a frown. “But there’s something that puzzles me.” Casper showed Envy another newspaper clipping. It was a small one, probably hardly noticed by readers back then. “In their search for clues, police were looking for evidence of a homicide and the instrument used to cut the baby’s umbilical cord. I’m curious; what exactly did you use?”
“At first, I didn’t know what to do. I was too shocked.
I couldn’t believe that I had given birth. Then I tried to think, and I remember seeing something on television that showed a father cutting his newborn son’s umbilical cord. Back then I didn’t know that’s what the cord was called. It looked like a rope to me. I remember searching through my purse to find something I could use to do like the man. I found a pair of nail clippers. I used them to—”
Casper showed the palm of his hand. “Stop. No need to go any further. I get the picture. There’s something else.”
“What else?” The familiar look of terror Casper had come to recognize covered Envy’s face.
“Autopsy results.” For a third time, he presented Envy with more information from her past. “An autopsy was done on your baby. It was determined by the medical examiner that the baby was stillborn, which means that you are not a murderer, Miss Wilson. What you did was wrong. I’m not denying that, but you were young, foolish, and pregnant. You were scared and you didn’t know which way to turn. Gosh,” he said, and leaned against his chair, “I’m sure when you went to the bathroom that day you had no idea you were about to give birth. Even after having given birth, at your age, you probably weren’t aware that a stillbirth is supposed to be reported.”
“No, I had no idea what I was supposed to do. I guess I hoped it would all go away. That I would wake up and find that I’d been in a nightmare for the past nine months.”
“I’m sure it was a nightmare, only one that you actually lived through.”
Envy glanced at Casper. Maybe he really did understand what she went through back then. She couldn’t hold back her tears. She cried quietly with her head in her hands.
Casper passed her a napkin from off the table. At that moment, he felt an odd sense of closeness to her.
“Everything is going to work out.” He tried reassuring her.
While she continued to cry, he sat quietly and gave her some time to digest what he had shared. As he sat in silence, thoughts about his own past flooded his bank of memories. The way things looked, Envy would have a chance of being set free from the guilt she’d carried around all of these years, but he didn’t know if it would be that easy for him.
He could relate somewhat with how she felt. He’d done quite a few things when he was young that he truly regretted. He often played in his mind a tune by one of the old-timers, Tyrone Davis: “If I Could Turn Back the Hands of Time.” The key word was “if.” If only he had asked Lillie, his one true love, to marr
y him; then he wouldn’t be an over the top workaholic, a man whose entire life was structured around his profession. But he was far too busy back then trying to do well in law school, so he could one day have the means to marry her and take care of her in the manner in which she deserved. But Lillie didn’t want to wait. She accused Casper of making excuses. He never had time to see her. He was always too busy studying. When he wasn’t studying, he was working a part-time job to help cover some of his tuition. But she wanted more. She wanted to be by his side, to become his bride. She pleaded with him, told him she would work while he finished law school, but he wasn’t having it. His father would never approve of a woman working to send a man to school. “A real man makes his own way. A real man provides for his family,” his father used to tell him, repeatedly.
Time spent between him and Lillie lessened more and more. The day she told him that she had met someone else, and was moving on with her life, the news almost struck him down like a bolt of lightning. He was in too deep with his studies, commitments made to his parents, and obligations to complete what he had always wanted—a law degree.
Casper had played tough; he had gambled on Lillie’s love to be there for him always, and he had lost it all. But there was a flip side to Casper’s personality that was only evident in his work. He was a hardheaded idealist who believed good things came to those who waited. Envy Wilson had been waiting for eighteen years. Unlike him, there was still a chance for her to come out a winner.
He reminisced about the day he located the autopsy report on Envy’s baby. He was about to call it a day when he ran across autopsy results, stuck like glue on the back of a police report inside the folder. “Bingo,” he had said aloud when he read, ‘…determined the fetus was stillborn.’ “Yes!” Casper looked up at the ceiling. “Thank you for being my friend in high places.”
Envy finally stopped shedding tears. She looked at Casper with reddened eyes and a smile that forced him to smile back.
True Beauty Page 12
