Love Me Like I Love You

by Willow Winters

  “I’m not really a business person,” I mumble.

  Ignoring me, Gran goes on. “There is more to this than men in stuffy suits, my dear.”

  “Yeah…I know.” I set my teacup down and look out at the gray clouds. The breeze picks up and a chill comes over me.

  “So,” Gran says, changing the subject. “When am I going to meet this gentleman you’ve been seeing? Gloria Freemont tells me he’s quite the looker, even with those tattoos.” She shakes her head, clicking her tongue. “I don’t see the appeal in that.”

  I laugh. “A lot of people find tattoos sexy, Gran.”

  “You know what I found sexy about your grandfather?”

  “Do I want to know?”

  “The way he treated his inferiors. You’d never know they were inferiors. When I met him, the farm was struggling. There had been a drought followed by a year of nonstop rain. It nearly wiped out everything. And within the next two years, luck changed and he got the first partnership selling to a national distributor. He made his first million the next year. But he still worked the fields. Took extra shifts to give his employees days off. I’ll never meet another man like your grandfather,” she ends, voice dropping.

  Gran married two more times after my grandpa died. She divorced her second husband after six years of marriage, saying she was bored with him. She married six months later to a telenovela star she met in Miami, shocking us all. He wasn’t a legal citizen, so the marriage isn’t technically recognized. He got into some trouble and got deported. She still keeps in contact with him, but I don’t think she ever fully committed to either of those men.

  It was my fear after Jake died. I’d never find someone I loved as much. I’d forever think back to what I had, comparing anyone I had interest in to Jake. And they’d fail.

  “Excuse me, ma’am,” Melinda, my parents’ housekeeper says as she steps onto the porch. “Dinner is ready.”

  I help Gran to her feet and go inside, taking my usual spot at the dining room table next to Lisa. She’s quiet throughout the meal, averting her eyes whenever I look her way. As soon as we’re done, she grabs my wrist and pulls me into the living room, away from the rest of the family.

  “We need to talk,” she blurts, looking nervous.

  “Are you pregnant?” I whisper.

  “What? God no.” She looks down at her stomach. “Do I look pregnant? It’s this fucking shirt, isn’t it?”

  “No, you don’t. But if you just found out you wouldn’t look pregnant. That’s not the point. What the hell is going on?”

  “Chase,” she says, and her voice cuts through the air like a sharp knife.

  “What about Chase?”

  “He came to the bank yesterday.”

  “I know. He brought you the coffee and the muffin, right?”

  “Yeah, but he stayed and had a meeting with Melissa to set up an account.”

  I slowly shake my head. “I don’t see why that’s reason to sound the alarm. He’s living here, so it makes sense to have his bank account here.”

  “It’s not just that though…and I don’t know all the details since Melissa handled it. He put a lot of money into his account. And I mean a lot. I saw the paperwork at the end of the day. He had cash, Si. Two hundred grand in cash.”

  Yeah, that’s weird, but I don’t want to say it out loud. “Maybe he took all his money from his other bank?”

  “You don’t have to literally take it out in cash like that. It’s just weird and gave me a bad feeling. So I…I got his info and asked Rob to run a background check on him.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Yes, and you should be glad I did.” Lisa’s eyes cloud over with guilt and worry. “He’s been arrested before. Many times. And the most recent was three months ago for breaking and entering.”

  I don’t say anything. My heart is in my throat.

  “That’s not all.” Lisa swallows hard before going on. “Rob said some of the charges were dropped but couldn’t figure out why. And the same judge wrote them off. He said it seemed suspicious as fuck, so he had his lieutenant look at it, and he thinks Chase might have ties to the mafia or something.”

  “Chase is not in the mafia,” I say, trying to sound like I believe it. “That doesn’t even make sense.”

  “Think about it, Sierra. He came to the bank with a duffle bag full of money. He’s been arrested a million times with the charges suddenly dropped, and you saw him fight those guys at the party! Plus, he has that suped up Mustang that had to cost at least fifty grand and he was wearing designer clothes.”

  “Maybe he likes nice things. That doesn’t make him a mobster.”

  “Sierra, use your head. Something is off about him and he could be dangerous!”

  “Nothing is off about him,” I hiss, anger rising. “You don’t know him like I do. And are you forgetting you were the one who told me to go for him?”

  “That was before I knew.”

  “Maybe you should have run a background check on him first.” I let out a huff, shaking my head.

  “Sierra, be logical.”

  “Oh, I am logical. I’m not the one running unwarranted background checks and creeping on someone’s bank information. I like Chase. He makes me happy. Oh, right. You said it’s weird seeing us together.”

  “What?”

  I raise an eyebrow. “Right. Act like you don’t remember telling me it’s weird seeing me with someone other than Jake. You remember Chase fighting, but don’t remember what you said.”

  “I said that? Fuck, I’m an asshole.”

  “Yeah, you are.” I spin on my heel, giving Rob a look on my way out. I grab my shoes and head out, pissed because it feels like they betrayed me, going behind my back to get dirt on Chase.

  And because I’m struggling to not believe it all to be true.

  “You should really lock your doors.”

  Chase’s voice comes from behind me, and I jump, heart going a million miles an hour. I’m upstairs in my reading room, lost in thought and grumbling at myself for thinking it would be a good idea to reorganize my bookshelves at nine at night. Or ever. Because I have a lot of books, and now I have a huge mess. But after dinner, I needed to stay busy. It was the only way to keep Lisa’s words out of my head. She’s called me twice and texted a few times to say she was sorry for saying it was weird to see me with anyone other than Jake. I believe her, and know she does feel bad. Lisa’s always been one to spout off when she’s drunk. It’s not the first time, and it won’t be the last time.

  “Chase,” I say, voice all breathy. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

  “Exactly. Anyone could have walked in. And up the stairs.”

  I grip my copy of Harry Potter and stand, eyeballing Chase. He’s wearing jeans and a white T-shirt, looking sexy as hell. His wavy brown hair is a tad messy, adding to his sex appeal, and the stubble on his face accentuates his good looks.

  “I texted you,” he goes on, stepping over a pile of books.

  “Oh, I heard my phone but thought it was Lisa. She’s been texting me all night.”

  “Dakota wanted me to read her a bedtime story, that’s what took so long.”

  He comes closer and my heart skips a beat. “That’s sweet of you to do.”

  He gives me his trademark shrug. “She’s a cute kid. Actually makes me a bit sad I didn’t get to know her sooner.”

  The knot in my chest loosens and Chase takes me in his arms, greeting me like usual. I let the book drop and hold him tight. We kiss and in that moment, one thing becomes abundantly clear to me: I don’t care if Chase is dangerous. Who he is…what we have…I don’t want to change a thing.

  “What are you doing?” Chase asks, looking at the books on the floor.

  “Rearranging my bookshelves. I was thinking about doing it by color.”

  His eyebrows go up. “You’re going to split apart your series?”

  I laugh at the horror in his voice. “No. I had a plan for that. The bottom shelf will be for seri
es. Most of my books are standalones. I think. Shit. I really don’t know and now I have a huge mess.”

  “I would think working in a bookstore would make you want to organize them by author name.”

  “That’s too logical. And I do that all day at the store. Arranging by color is prettier. Have you seen pictures of rainbow bookshelves? The aesthetic is amazing.”

  “I haven’t but I’ll take your word for it. And there is something pleasing about seeing colors gradually change into each other. Though I’m personally a minimalist and prefer whites and grays.”

  “I noticed. I like color.”

  Chase smiles. “You do? I had no idea.” He pokes me in the ribs, making me laugh. And now that he knows I’m ticklish, he doesn’t stop until we’re both on the floor. Chase is over top of me, and I drag my hands down his back and grip his waist, moving him between my legs. We haven’t had sex since Friday after the party, and it feels like it’s been so fucking long.

  Chase must be thinking the same thing, and we kiss and rip off each other’s clothing in a matter of seconds. We’re both lying naked on the floor, surrounded by books. Chase kisses his way down my body, not stopping until his head is between my legs. I gasp, reaching down and taking a tangle of his hair as his tongue slowly rolls over my clit. He licks and sucks, then slips a finger inside me, pressing on my inner walls until I come. Wiping his mouth, he looks up with a devilish glint in his eye.

  He stands up, helps me to my feet, and guides me over to the yoga ball. With his hands on my waist, he sits, legs spread and feet planted on the ground. Facing him, I carefully move on top and guide his cock inside. He starts out slow, making sure I’m okay and that we can keep our balance. The ball is up against the wall, sandwiched between that and Chase’s legs. I wrap my arms around Chase and arch my back. The movement causes us to bounce on the ball, and I feel every inch of him inside me.

  “Fuck,” I moan and rock my hips. Chase buries his head in my breasts, as his hands run up and down my back. He takes one of my breasts in his mouth, teeth gently nipping my flesh.

  I lean forward, throwing a hand out to catch the wall and keep from tumbling off, and thrust hard against Chase. We bounce on the ball, driving his cock deeper into me. I moan and Chase bucks his hips, then starts fucking me hard and fast. My breasts bounce in his face and his fingers dig into my waist.

  “You are so fucking hot,” he groans and my muscles tighten. The orgasm starts from deep within, exploding within me and making my toes curl and ears ring. Chase presses me against him, breathing hard as he comes, and feeling his cock pulsing inside me is so hot I almost come again. Panting, Chase lowers us to the floor.

  “Fuck,” he mumbles. “I meant to pull out.”

  “I didn’t think about it either,” I confess. Pulling out has been our method of birth control the last week or so. “I like feeling you come. Is that weird?”

  “Fuck no. That’s hot.” Chase brushes my hair out of my eyes and kisses me.

  “I have a doctor’s appointment next week to get back on the pill. I tried to get her to just phone in the script but I’m due for my annual so I have to go in.”

  “Sounds fun.”

  “Loads.” Thunder echoes outside and rain falls down hard against the roof. “Oh, shit,” I say and sit up. “I opened the bedroom windows to let in the breeze and never closed them.”

  Chase gets to his feet and grabs his boxers. “I’ll close them.”

  “Thanks.”

  He steps into his boxers and rushes downstairs. I take my time getting up and moving downstairs, going straight to the bathroom to clean myself up.

  “Want to take a shower with me?” I ask Chase. “Before the storm hits.”

  “You can’t shower in a storm?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.

  “You could get electrocuted that way if the lightning hit.”

  “That sounds like an old wives’ tale.”

  “I’m pretty sure it’s true,” I say and turn on the water. “So we have to hurry.”

  “You’re lucky I already fucked you.” He comes into the bathroom and runs his eyes up and down my body. “You are beautiful, Sierra.”

  We get in the shower and wash quickly. Since Chase had planned on staying the night with me, he brought clothes. We change into PJs and go into the kitchen.

  “I have homemade cheesecake from my parents,” I start and open the fridge. “Do you want any?”

  “Yeah, sounds good.”

  I pull the dish from the fridge not a moment too soon. Thunder booms and the power goes out.

  “Hang on,” I say and feel my way to the kitchen sink, dropping down and opening the cabinet beneath it. I turn on a flashlight and use it to locate my candles.

  “Those lanterns come in handy,” Chase says after we stick candles in them throughout the house.

  “I know, right? I’ve been told I have too many as decorations, but look at this. So practical. The cats won’t get into the flames this way.”

  The wind is blowing against the back of the house, so we take our cheesecake and a blanket to the front porch. We sit close together on the bench, eating in silence as we watch the storm rage on around us.

  I look at Chase as lightning flashes, illuminating his handsome face. Lisa is wrong. There is nothing off about him. At all. And if there were…I don’t think I’d care.

  Chapter 20

  Chase

  “The twins are measuring a week ahead. Melissa is getting induced Friday unless she goes into labor before then,” Josh tells me. It’s Monday night and the bar is slow, as expected. The regulars are all here, drinking away their problems like usual.

  “Is that a good thing to measure ahead?”

  “It’s not bad, and actually matches with what we thought was the original conception date.”

  “You remember the day?”

  Josh lets out a snort of laughter. “Unlike you, I wasn’t getting it every night. Dakota went through a phase of only falling asleep if she was held and would end up in our bed. Melissa and I didn’t get many opportunities. We took what we could get, and it resulted in identical twins.”

  “They weren’t planned?” I can’t help but ask. Accidental pregnancies might be on my mind.

  “Eh, not really, but we knew we wanted another kid someday. It happened sooner than we expected, though with pulling out being our lazy way of preventing, I’m surprised it didn’t happen sooner.”

  His words hit me and I feel the blood drain from my face.

  “Y’all too?” he laughs. “What the fuck are you thinking? You know that shit doesn’t really work. I’m surprised Sierra lets you—nope, don’t want to go there.”

  And now I’m laughing. “I can’t even fucking think about it.”

  “I hope you don’t have to, but seriously, did you miss sex ed in school? Or maybe you’re hoping for a little Chase. You and Sierra would make nice babies.”

  “Not fucking funny, dude.”

  “Oh it is. To me.” Josh turns and goes to another customer, and a group of middle-aged women come in the doors making a beeline to the bar. One sees me, smiles, and keeps walking, but the other two come to a standstill. Smiles realizes her friends stopped, and turns, wondering what’s going on. They shake their heads and look at me, trying to warn Smiles about something. She rolls her eyes and comes up, ordering three beers.

  Now that she’s in front of me, I recognize her as one of the waitresses from Suzy’s cafe. Her hair is down now, and she has quite a bit of makeup on. I bring them their drinks and move away, wiping up spilled whiskey. Over the music, I can hear the women talking.

  “Sierra Belmont is dating him,” one whispers.

  “How did he land a Belmont?” another quips. “I mean, he’s good-looking, but—” Her voice is cut off by laughter coming from the opposite end of the bar.

  “Sierra’s a smart girl, if she feels safe around him, we should too,” the waitress says firmly, and I wipe the same spot over again just to listen. They turn the
ir conversation to the upcoming Fourth of July festival. I move on, and the night goes by slowly. Around ten o’clock, Melissa calls Josh and says she’s not feeling well. Apologizing more than once for making me close by myself, he leaves in a rush and texts me an hour later to say they think Melissa is in labor and are headed up to the hospital now.

  I’m happy for my brother and excited to have two nephews that I’ll know from the start this time around. By eleven-thirty, the bar is empty except for the local drunks, and after finding them rides home, I close down and am upstairs by midnight. I text Sierra, not wanting to call and wake her up, then get in the shower.

  I check my phone before going to bed. Sierra hasn’t texted me back, leading me to assume she’s sleeping. Thinking about her lying in bed, eyes closed, looking innocent yet still sexy as fuck at the same time brings a smile to my face.

  With the image of Sierra on my mind, I open my voicemail. Sierra and I have a good thing going. I need to delete these messages and pretend it never happened. Or maybe I should listen to them one more time, commit them to memory so I don’t fuck up again.

  Sierra never told me about her brother in Orlando. I heard it on a message and slipped up. I can’t be that careless again. What she’s told me and what I’ve heard from the messages blur together in my brain. I need to forget everything I wasn’t supposed to hear.

  Or better yet, I could come clean. Almost clean? Tell her I listened to the first one then deleted the rest. It doesn’t sound as bad. I sigh and look at the messages. There are more that I haven’t listened to, and that last message calls to me.

  Why is it the last?

  What made Sierra finally stop calling?

  “It doesn’t matter,” I tell myself out loud. I need to delete them all. Move on and not bring this up again until Sierra and I are happily married with a kid or two. It’ll be a thing of the past and she’ll be annoyed for half a day then get over it because clearly we were meant to meet and end up together.

  Whoa.

  The thought comes so naturally to me it’s jarring. I feel so strongly for Sierra already and know I’ll never meet another woman like her in my life. I have to delete the messages.