Myth Conceptions

by Robert Asprin

  The leader reddened slightly.

  "I am the commander of this sector!" he barked. "I demand to see Skeeve, commander of the defense, not his lacky!"

  I dropped one of the bags of flash powder on the ground at my feet.

  "If you insist," Aahz growled, "I'll get him. But he won't be happy."

  "I'm not here to make him happy," the leader shouted. "Now be off with you."

  "That won't be necessary," Aahz leered. "He's a magician. He hears and sees what his servants hear and see. He'll be along."

  That was my cue. I let drop the sheet of invisibility and simultaneously ignited the bag of flash powder.

  The results were spectacular.

  The soldiers, with the exception of the leader, fell back several steps. To them, it looked as if I had suddenly appeared from thin air, materializing in a cloud of red smoke.

  For me, the effect was less impressive: As the bag of flash powder went off, it was made apparent to me that watching a cloud of smoke from a distance was markedly different from standing at ground zero.

  As I was enveloped in the scarlet billows, my feeling was not of elated triumph but rather a nearly overwhelming desire to cough and sneeze.

  My efforts to suppress my reactions caused me to contort my features to the point where I must have borne more than a faint resemblance to Gus.

  "Steady, Master!" Aahz cautioned.

  "Aahz. Ah!" I gasped.

  "Do not let your anger overcome your reason," my mentor continued hastily. "They don't know the powers they trifle with."

  "I . . . I did not wish to be disturbed," I managed at last, regaining my breath as the smoke dissipated.

  The leader of the group had held his ground through the entire proceedings, though he looked a bit paler and less sure of himself than when he had been dealing with just Aahz.

  "We . . . um . . . apologize for bothering you," he began uncertainly. "But there are certain matters requiring your immediate attention . . . specifically the war we are currently engaged in."

  I eyed him carefully. He seemed to be of a different cut than Claude had been.

  "I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage, sir," I said cagily. "You seem to know me, but I don't recall having met you before."

  "We have not met before," the officer replied grimly. "If we had, be assured one of us would not be here currently. I know you by reputation, specifically for your recent efforts to resist the advance of our army. For myself, I am Antonio, commander of the right wing of the left flank of the Empire's army. These are my officers."

  He indicated the soldiers behind him with a vague wave of his hand. The men responded by drawing themselves more erect and thrusting out their chins arrogantly.

  I acknowledged them with a slight nod.

  "Where is Claude?" I asked casually. "I was under the impression he was an officer of this sector."

  "You are correct," Antonio smirked. "He was. He is currently being detained until he can be properly court-martialed . . . for incompetence!"

  "Incompetence?" I echoed. "Come now, sir. Aren't you being a little harsh? While Claude may have overstepped his abilities a bit, I wouldn't say he's incompetent. I mean, after all, he was dealing with supernatural powers, if you know what I mean."

  As I spoke, I wiggled my fingers dramatically at Aahz and removed his disguise.

  The jaws of the attending officers dropped, ruining their arrogant jut. Then Aahz grinned at them, and their mouths clicked shut in unison as they swallowed hard.

  Antonio was unimpressed.

  "Yes, yes," he said briskly, waving a hand as if at an annoying fly. "We have had reports, many reports, as to your rapport with demons. Claude's incompetence is in his disastrous underestimation of the forces opposing him. Be assured, I will not be guilty of the same error."

  "Don't count on it, Tony," Aahz leered. "We demons can be a pretty tricky lot.

  The officer ignored him.

  "However, we are not here for idle pleasantries," he said, fixing me with a stern gaze. "I believe we have a dispute to settle concerning right of passage over this particular piece of terrain."

  "We have a dispute concerning your right of passage over the kingdom of Possiltum," I corrected.

  "Yes, yes," Antonio yawned. "Of course, if you want to stop us from gaining Possiltum, you had best stop us here."

  "That's about how we had it figured," Aahz agreed.

  "Not to belabor the point, Antonio," I smiled, "but I believe we do have you stopped."

  "Temporarily," the officer smiled. "I expect that situation to change shortly . . . shall we say, a few hours after dawn? Tomorrow?"

  "We'll be here," Aahz nodded.

  "Just a moment," I interrupted. "Antonio, you strike me as being a sporting man. Would you like to make our encounter tomorrow a little more interesting? Say, with a little side wager?"

  "Such as what?" the officer scowled.

  "If you lose tomorrow," I said carefully, "will you admit Claude's defeat had nothing to do with incompetence and drop the charges against him?"

  Antonio thought for a moment, then nodded.

  "Done," he said. "Normally I would fear what the reaction of my superiors would be, but I am confident of my victory. There are things even a demon cannot stand against."

  "Such as?" Aahz drawled.

  "You will see," the officer smiled. "Tomorrow."

  With that,, he spun on his heel and marched off, his officers trailing behind him.

  "What do you think, Aahz?" I murmured.

  "Think?" my mentor scowled. "I think you're going soft, kid. First Brockhurst, now Claude. What is this `be kind to enemies' kick you're on?"

  "I meant about tomorrow," I clarified quickly.

  "I dunno, kid," Aahz admitted. "He sounded too confident for comfort. I wish I knew what he's got up his sleeve that's supposed to stop demons."

  "Well," I sighed, "I guess we'll see tomorrow."

  Chapter Twenty-One

  "It takes a giant to fight a giant."

  -H. PRYM

  OUR pensiveness was still with us the next day.

  Our opponents were definitely up to something, but we couldn't tell exactly what it was. Tanda and Brockhurst had headed out on a scouting trip during the night and had brought back puzzling news. The Empire's soldiers had brought up some kind of heavy equipment, but it was hidden from sight by a huge box. All our scouts could say for sure was that whatever the secret weapon was, it was big and it was heavy.

  Gus offered to fly over the box to take a quick peek inside, but we vetoed the idea. With the box constantly in the center of a mass of soldiers, there was no way the gargoyle could carry out his mission unobserved. Even if he used the invisibility sheet, the army was so far flung that someone would see him. So far we had kept the gargoyle's presence on our team as a secret, and we preferred to keep it that way. Even if we disguised him as Aahz or myself, it would betray the fact that someone in our party was able to fly. As Aahz pointed out, it looked as if this campaign would be rough enough without giving the opposition advance warning of the extent of our abilities.

  This was all tactically sound and irrefutably logical. Nonetheless, it did nothing to reassure me as Aahz and I stood waiting for Antonio to make his opening gambit.

  "Relax, kid," Aahz murmured. "You look nervous."

  "I am nervous," I snapped back. "We're standing out here waiting to fight, and we don't know who or what we're supposed to be fighting. You'll forgive me if that makes me a trifle edgy."

  I was aware I was being unnecessarily harsh on my mentor. Ajax and Gus were standing by, and Brockhurst and Tanda were watching for any new developments. The only team member unaccounted for this morning was the Gremlin, but I thought it wisest not to bring this to Aahz's attention. I assumed our elusive blue friend was off somewhere with Gleep, as my pet was also missing.

  Everything that could have been done in preparation had been done. However, I still felt uneasy.

  "Look at it this
way, kid," Aahz tried again. "At least we know what we aren't up against."

  What we weren't dealing with was soldiers. Though a large number of them were gathered in the near vicinity, there seemed to be no effort being made to organize or arm them for battle. As the appointed time drew near, it became more and more apparent that they were to be spectators only in the upcoming fray.

  "I think I'd rather deal with soldiers," I said glumly.

  "Heads up, kid," Aahz retorted, nudging me with his elbow. "Whatever's going to happen is about to.

  I knew what he meant, which bothered me. There was no time to ponder it, however. Antonio had just put in his appearance.

  He strolled around one corner of the mammoth box deep in conversation with a suspicious-looking character in a hooded cloak. He shot a glance in our direction, smiled, and waved merrily.

  We didn't wave back.

  "I don't like the looks of this, kid," Aahz growled.

  I didn't either, but there wasn't much we could do except wait. Antonio finished his conversation with the stranger and stepped back, folding his arms across his chest. The stranger waved some of the onlooking soldiers aside, then stepped back himself. Drawing himself up, he began weaving his hands back and forth in a puzzling manner. Then the wind carried the sound to me and I realized he was chanting.

  "Aahz!" I gasped. "They've got their own magician."

  "I know," Aahz grinned back. "But from what I can hear he's bluffing them the same way you bluffed the court back at Possiltum. He probably doesn't have any more powers than I do."

  No sooner had my mentor made his observation than the side of the huge box which was facing us slowly lowered itself to the ground. Revealed inside the massive container was a dragon.

  The box had been big, better than thirty feet long and twenty feet high, but from the look of the dragon he must have been cramped for space inside.

  He was big! I mean, really big!

  Now I've never kidded myself about Gleep's size. Though his ten-foot length might look trig here on Klah, I had seen dragons on Deva that made him look small. The dragon currently facing us, however, dwarfed everything I had seen before.

  He was an iridescent bluish-green his entire length, which was far more serpentine than I was accustomed to seeing in a dragon. He had massive bat wings that he stretched and flexed as he clawed his way out of the confining box. There was a silver glint from his eye sockets which would have made him look machinelike were it not for the fluid grace of his powerful limbs.

  For a moment, I was almost overcome by the beautiful spectacle he presented, emerging onto the battlefield. Then he threw his head back and roared, and my admiration turned icy cold within me.

  The great head turned until its eyes were focused directly on us. Then he began to stalk forward.

  "Time for the better part of valor, kid," Aahz whispered, tugging at my sleeve. "Let's get out of here."

  "Wait a minute, Aahz!" I shot back. "Do you see that? What the keeper's holding?"

  A glint of gold in the sunlight had caught my eye. The dragon's keeper had a gold pendant clasped in his fist as he urged his beast forward.

  "Yeah!" Aahz answered. "So?"

  "I've seen a pendant like that before!" I explained excitedly. "That's how he's controlling the dragon!"

  The Deveel who had been running the Dragon stall where I acquired Gleep had worn a pendant like that. The pendant was used to control dragons . . . unattached dragons, that is. Attached dragons can be controlled by their owner without other assistance. A dragon becomes attached to you when you feed it. That's how I got Gleep. I fed him, sort of. Actually, he helped himself to a hefty bit of my sleeve.

  "Well, don't just stand there, kid," Aahz barked, interrupting my reverie. "Get it!"

  I reached out with my mind and took a grab at the pendant. The keeper felt it start to go and tightened his grip on it, fighting me for its possession.

  "I . . . I can't get it, Aahz," I cried. "He won't let go.

  "Then hightail it outta here; kid," my mentor ordered. "Tell Ajax to bag us that keeper. Better tell Gus to stand by with Berfert just in case. I'll try to keep the dragon busy."

  An image flashed in my mind. It was a view of me, Skeeve, court magician, bolting for safety while Aahz faced the dragon alone. Something snapped in my mind.

  "You go!" I snapped.

  "Kid, are you-"

  "It's my war and my job," I shouted. "Now get going."

  With that I turned to face the oncoming dragon, not knowing or caring if Aahz followed my orders. I was Skeeve!

  But it was an awfully big dragon!

  I tried again for the pendant, nearly lifting the keeper from his feet with my effort, but the man clung firmly to his possession, screaming orders at the dragon as he did.

  I shot a nervous glance at the grim behemoth bearing down on me. If I tried to levitate out of the way, he could just ....

  "Look out, kid!" came Aahz's voice from behind me.

  I half turned, then something barreled past me, positioning itself between me and the oncoming menace.

  It was Gleep!

  "Gleep!" I shouted. "Get back here!"

  My pet paid me no mind. His master was being threatened, and he meant to have a hand in this no matter what I said.

  No longer a docile, playful companion, he planted himself between me and the monster, lowered his head to the ground, and hissed savagely, a six-foot tongue of flame leaping from his mouth as he did.

  The effect on the big dragon was astonishing. He lurched to a stop and sat back on his haunches, cocking his head curiously at the mini-dragon blocking his path.

  Gleep was not content with stopping his opponent, however. Heedless of the fact that the other dragon was over four times his size he began to advance stiffly, challenging his rival's right to the field.

  The large dragon blinked, then shot a look behind him. Then he looked down on Gleep again, drawing his head back until his long neck formed a huge question mark.

  Gleep continued to advance.

  I couldn't understand it. Even if the monster couldn't flame, Which was doubtful, it was obvious he had the sheer physical power to crush my pet with minimal effort. Still he did nothing, looking desperately about him almost as if he were embarrassed.

  I watched in spellbound horror. It couldn't last. If nothing else, Gleep was getting too close to the giant to be ignored. Any minute now, the monster would have to react.

  Finally, after a final glance at his frantic keeper, the big dragon did react. With a sigh, one of his taloned front paws lashed out horizontally in a cuff that would have caved in a building. It struck Gleep on the side of his head and sent him sprawling.

  My pet was game, though, and struggled painfully to his feet, shaking his head as if to clear it.

  Before he could assume his aggressive stance, however, the big dragon stretched his neck down until their heads were side by side, and he began to mutter and grumble in Gleep's ear. My dragon cocked his head as if listening, then "whuffed" in response.

  As the stunned humans and nonhumans watched, the two dragons conversed in the center of the battlefield punctuating their mutterings with occasional puffs of smoke.

  I tried to edge forward to get a better idea of exactly what was going on, but the big dragon turned a baleful eye on me and let loose a blast of flame which kept me at a respectful distance. Not that I was afraid, mind you; Gleep seemed to have the situation well in hand . . . or talon as the case might be. Well, I had always told Aahz that Gleep was a very talon-ted dragon.

  Finally, the big dragon drew himself up, turned, and majestically left the field without a backward glance, his head impressively high. Ignoring the angry shouts of the soldiers, he returned to his box and dropped his haunches, sitting with his back to the entire proceeding.

  His keeper's rage was surpassed only by Antonio's. He screamed at the keeper with purpled face and frantic gestures until the keeper angrily pulled the control pendant from around h
is neck, handed it to the officer, and stalked off. Antonio blinked at the pendant, then flung it to the ground and started off after the keeper.

  That was all the opening I needed. Reaching out with my mind, I brought the pendant winging to my hand.

  "Aahz!" I began.

  "I don't believe it," my mentor mumbled to himself. "I saw it, but I still don't believe it."

  "Gleep!"

  My pet came racing up to my side, understandably pleased with himself.

  "Hi, fella!" I cried, ignoring his breath and throwing my arms around his neck in a hug. "What happened out there, anyway?"

  "Gleep!" my pet said evasively, carefully studying a cloud.

  If I had expected an answer, it was clear I wasn't going to get one.

  "I still don't believe it," Aahz repeated.

  "Look, Aahz," I said, holding the pendant aloft. "Now we don't have to worry about that or any other dragon. We've shown a profit!"

  "So we did," Aahz scowled. "But do me a favor, huh, kid?"

  "What's that, Aahz?" I asked.

  "If that dragon, or any dragon, wanders into our camp, don't feed it! We already have one, and that's about all my nerves can stand. Okay?"

  "Sure, Aahz," I smiled.

  "Gleep!" said my pet, rubbing against me for more petting, which he got.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  "Hell hath no fury like a demon scorched"

  -C. MATHER

  Our next war council made the previous ones look small. This was only to be expected, as we were dealing with the commander of the entire left flank of the Empire's army.

  Our meeting was taking place in a pavilion constructed specifically for that purpose, and the structure was packed with officers, including Claude. It seemed Antonio was true to his word, even though he himself was not currently present.

  In the face of such a gathering, we had decided to show a bit more force ourselves. To that end, Tanda and Brockhurst were accompanying us, while Gleep snuffled around outside. Gus and Ajax we were still holding in reserve, while the Gremlin had not reappeared since the confrontation of dragons.

  I didn't like the officer we were currently dealing with. There was something about his easy, oily manner that set me on edge. I strongly suspected he had ascended to his current position by poisoning his rivals.