Own to Obey

by Zoey Ellis

  She returned back to the shinno’s left side with the brush in her hand, but wasn't sure how to brush him. She glanced at the girl, who looked to the shinno. When he nodded, she headed over to Shaya and gestured to her to kneel down by his side and showed her how to hold the brush. She then demonstrated quick, flicking movements with the brush tip and pointed to his markings.

  When Shaya tried this technique, she was delighted to see the markings blooming into the darker color that she had seen when the girl did it. Taking her time, she made her way over all the markings and then leaned back to look at his whole arm.

  The girl smiled at her, nodding, and then beckoned her back to the blanket.

  The rest of his grooming preparation proceeded with ease. The girl showed her how to fasten his decorations, and also how to hold his clothes so that he could slip into them. As she stood before him, buttoning up the strange tunic she helped him to put on, the nervousness with his eyes on her turned into something else. Something stronger—an echo or maybe a preparation of what was to come in the afternoons... but she rejected it, pushing it away in favor of thinking of her sister.

  ***

  The schedule of her days for the next week was to wake, groom the shinno, clean pipes on the decks, swallow the shinno’s seed while he made her squirm, and treat her hair. Sometimes he would have her suck him after she groomed him, after he had sent the girl out of the room, but each time the need for him to do more, to do something, increased. Her body needed attention that she knew he could give her, and yet she didn’t want anything like what he did to her the first day.

  During the times when she felt so distracted by desire after he left her, she calmed herself by thinking of her sister and the gardens she had left behind. The creams and oils the girl had provided moistened and softened her hair beautifully, maintained her natural curls, and made it manageable. She suspected that some of the unfamiliar ones were even better than anything her sister used, but she was glad that her hair could thrive in these conditions. She still kept it wrapped up, but the heat on the decks alone was a constant problem.

  One morning, after grooming him, the shinno pulled a table that always sat in the corner into the center of the room and fixed the chair behind it, while the girl removed the blanket with his grooming equipment. Shaya watched him warily as he sat at the table, holding a rectangular, smooth stone, wondering what he was planning next. They had never eaten together. The girl was the one who brought all Shaya’s meals and she ate them in her room on her own. It was the only time that she felt truly alone on the ship. She was used to her own company, but she always ate with Kyus whenever possible.

  The girl returned with cups and dishes and pots and spread them out on the table. Once again, she spoke softly pointing to her eyes and then the table. “Soss lec yuss.”

  Shaya nodded. She needed to watch to learn, just like the grooming.

  The girl carefully assembled the dishes, spoons, and pots in to a spread, with a strangely shaped pot filled with water in the center, surrounded by smaller dishes holding colored powders and granules. In front of the shinno she placed a cup on a little plate.

  Shooting Shaya a meaningful look, she used the different spoons to add the different substances into both the cup and pot. Once she finished, she added a small flower to the cup and stirred the pot. Finally, she lifted the pot, and poured the hot, fragrant water into the cup. Shaya peered closer to see where the water was coming from and noticed a tiny spout at the very top, just by the lid.

  The girl placed the pot back in the center, and then watched as the flower rose to the top of the cup and floated. “Fevvoli,” she said, pointing to the cup.

  Shaya nodded, taking a deep breath. This was going to be difficult. Shaya had never seen such a complicated way to simply make tea.

  The shinno only allowed the girl to show Shaya three times, and then he sent her away. Unfortunately, she was punished when she got it wrong, which she wasn’t expecting.

  The first time she reached out for the wrong item, the shinno grabbed her wrist and scraped the stone he held along her knuckles.

  A sharp, shooting pain jolted into her hand and she tried to yank it away but the shinno held it firm. Saying something in a warning tone, he released her wrist and she jumped back shaking her hand furiously. The pain wasn’t from the stone against her skin, it was as though something from the stone had jumped inside her hand and was wriggling around. She peered at the stone, wondering what the hell it was, but the shinno was ordering her to start again with the tea.

  Things became worse from that moment.

  Shaya realized everything had to be done in the correct order, using the correct items, the correct amount of each spice and powder, and all within the correct brewing time. The first time she tried pouring from the teapot, the water spewed everywhere—the spout was so awkward, she couldn’t get the angle right. And each time she got something wrong, he spoke to her sternly and scraped the stone along her knuckles.

  Within half an hour, she was crying out every time the stone touched her and could barely move her hand. She pleaded for the girl to come back and show her once more, but the shinno remained stern and forceful, not allowing her any leeway when her hand became too stiff and painful to move—he simply directed his attentions to the other hand.

  By the time the girl returned to bring her lunch and collect the items, she could finally make the damn tea correctly, but both of her hands were useless. She waited until they had both left and then dropped down onto the bed and allowed the tears to come. The girl had brought her soup, probably to make it easier for her to eat, but Shaya didn’t even feel like eating anything. This was the worse pain she had ever been in.

  Curled up on the bed, she squeezed her eyes shut and sent her mind to her garden, remembering how she used to wander and explore, peek on the wild animals that would visit, pick fruit and herbs for her potions and meals. It had been a blissful life, and she was so caught in the memory, she almost didn’t hear the door when it opened.

  When she opened her eyes, the shinno was entering the room again. He walked slowly to the bed and looked down on her for a long moment. She watched him steadily back, repeating her mantra in her mind. When he reached for her, yanking her to the edge of the bed by her hips, and pulling her upright, she realized, with horror, what he was there for.

  She tried lifting her hands, but the pain seemed to echo down her arms—there was no way she could rub his cock. So she used her mouth as much as she could, inching her fingers up to brush and stroke his balls hoping he wouldn’t notice. But in her efforts to ensure he didn’t force her to use her hands, she became caught in the enthusiasm and delight of the feel of him in her mouth. She sucked his tip hard, flicking her tongue along his ridge, and then moved her face sideways to suck on the side of his shaft, rubbing her mouth back and forth and savoring the feel of his fluid and her own saliva smearing her face.

  He came rougher than he had before, groaning loud and long, jerking harder into her mouth as he caressed her breasts.

  When he was finally spent, she was even more turned on by him than ever before, and if she could have found the words she would have begged him to touch her everywhere. The fact that she wanted him, even after everything, disgusted her and she couldn’t bear to keep her head up. His seed dribbled from her mouth and into her lap with the tears that fell from her eyes.

  In a sudden swift move, the shinno lifted her into his arms. He fixed her arms around his neck and rested her head in the crook of his neck. He spoke, somewhat gently, in his own tongue while she cried silently, strangely comforted by his warm scent, and his odd words, and the feel of being against his body.

  Kyus would never know, she told herself. She’d never know anything that has happened so it didn’t matter. He hadn’t broken her yet. Not really. If she enjoyed the things he did to her, the things he made her do, took comfort in the arms of the monster, wasn’t that better than hating it?

  After a long stretch of hi
m holding her, the shinno, who had fallen silent, said, “Lanatton arook.” For the first time, his voice was softer than she'd heard before and something in his tone caused her to look up at him.

  His strange eyes swept her face, but she could not identify the expression in them. Everything about him was hard, his body, his face, his voice, but in his eyes, at least this time, there was something different there.

  “Lanatton arook.” He paused, his eyes searching hers as he conceded, adding, “Katashaya.”

  ***

  The next day, on the deck, Shaya tried to plead with the woman she was left with after the shinno walked away.

  “My arms,” she said slowly. “My arms are aching from yesterday. Can I do something else?”

  The woman didn't even blink at Shaya's attempt to speak to her. This woman had thick black hair and was thin and angular, but just as stern as the other women Shaya had met who ran the decks. She urged and hurried Shaya toward the pipes as though she hadn’t spoken at all.

  “I cannot clean today,” Shaya insisted, trying to be firmer. “My hands and arms hurt too much. I'll do something else. What else can I do?”

  The woman pointed to the bucket, her face firm and resolute. Either she didn't understand what Shaya was saying or she didn't care.

  Shaya lowered to the floor slowly, wondering what the hell she was going to do. Even straightening her fingers was a struggle and the pain ricocheted down her arms, there was no way she could clean as briskly as needed, but there was no other way to get out of it.

  When she began to clean, her hands burned as though there was a fire inside them trying to make its way to the surface. Her muscles seem to be tearing themselves apart in agony all the way up her arms, and tears came to her eyes as she tried to push through it and continue cleaning, but she could not do it.

  Things became worse when the woman who oversaw the area, noticed she wasn’t cleaning and slapped her arms

  Shaya cried out, pulling her arms and hands in to protect them, but the woman didn't stop, spitting out hard words at Shaya as she continued to attack. Shaya inched backward trying to get away from her, but finally the woman grabbed her wrist and yanked her up. She muttered something in her tongue, her voice low and her eyes almost glinting.

  Turning, the woman pulled Shaya behind her as she walked, and Shaya's eyes widened with horror as she realized where she was going.

  The shinno saw them coming and stepped away from the boulders, a frown on his face as he watched them approach.

  The woman spoke to him, somewhat harshly, gesturing to Shaya and pointing back at the pipes. Shaya watched as his expression changed to one of annoyance and she shrunk back from him as his gaze turned to her.

  He said a few words to the woman and she turned and walked away, leaving Shaya with him. He grabbed her arm, and she winced at the pain, stumbling after him as he took her to a side of the deck near the stairs.

  Grabbing a coil of rope, he twisted it around her wrists until they were secured together, and then lifted them above her head.

  She gasped as the pain ricocheted down her arm. “My hands and arms hurt,” she said hurriedly, as the shinno began to attach the rope to one of the hooks above where they were standing. “My arms hurt from yesterday, please, just let me rest them and I will be able to continue tomorrow.”

  The shinno didn't pay any attention to her as he secured the rope above her head, fastening her arms in place. But once she was secure he looked down at her, his fierce eyes boring into hers. “Lanatton arook, Shaya.” He turned and walked back to the men with the boulders, leaving her with her arms above her head.

  Shaya took a breath as she watched him walking away. She could do this. As long as she didn't move too much, as long as she didn't think about the pain, she could stay here. She ran her eyes along the rest of the deck, watching materials passing from one section to another, watching pots being stirred and liquid being poured—care taken at each stage and suddenly, the entire structure of what they were doing became clearer. The red tinted boulders were being broken up and melted down. Ultimately, they were turning the boulders into a liquid that was being taken somewhere into the ship, and along the ground of the whole deck, there were men and women cleaning the pipes.

  She returned her eyes to the boulders. She knew there was something strange about them from the first time she saw them. Having worked in the expansive gardens of her sister’s future husband, who was actually a prince, she had never seen boulders that looked the way these did. Shaya watched the men, and the shinno, for a few rounds as they turned the rock over and over, pausing in between as they stared at it. Maybe they had to keep rotating it until it turned red, but it seemed like the most boring job in the world. They didn't even speak to each other; they simply concentrated on the rocks in front of them in silence.

  Although she had tended to her gardens in silence, usually by herself, she was never really alone. The expansive land stretched quite far out around the house, far enough that it felt as though she was somewhere else, lost in a friendly, bright, and comfortable environment. The greenery of the gardens and the bursts of color was always a delight, no matter the season, as was the trilling call and cooing of the tiny unseen animals that lived among the plants.

  Tears sprang to Shaya's eyes, but she tried her hardest to blink them away. She had chosen to give that up, she couldn't be upset about it. She knew that Kyus would make sure her gardens were looked after, no matter what.

  The day wore on, and although Shaya tried to stay as still as possible, gripping onto the rope that held her arms up, the pain increased. She gritted her teeth, blinking away more tears as her arms exploded in pain. She lowered her head, breathing heavily, trying to tell herself that the pain was not real, but it was. Tears ran down her cheeks and soon the pain was so strong, she welcomed the edging darkness as it closed over her.

  An icy wetness slammed into her face and Shaya gasped as she jumped awake.

  “Ni ashlettet odd dess eshak rezem dess besh okkeartheffet,” the shinno growled before her. He lowered the bucket he was holding, clearly annoyed.

  Shaya gulped in mouthfuls of air, the drops of water dripping from her lashes and rolling down her cheeks. The shinno slowly put the bucket down, shot her a warning look and walked away toward the boulders.

  Shaya shook her head to try to fling the water from her face, hoping that none had splashed into her hair, but was suddenly reminded her painful arms remained fixed above her head.

  She pressed her lips together. He wanted her to suffer. He wanted her to endure the pain. She scrunched her lips together as a determination overcame her. She would not give him the satisfaction of seeing her destroyed. She had already vowed that she would not break. He could do whatever he wanted to her body—she would not allow him to crush her spirit. Picking a point on the deck, she stared directly at it and thought only of her home. Focusing her mind, she recalled memories of her childhood; reading her first book, hearing the flute for the first time, her first bite of spiced chicken from Cathley’s market stall...

  The light on the deck changed as the day wore on, as the skies darkened, Shaya suddenly noticed that someone was blocking the viewpoint she picked.

  She blinked, lifting her head to meet the gaze of a man, an Alpha, staring at her. He was large and thick, but not quite as big as the shinno, with creamy tan skin and dark hair covering his head, his jaw, and around his mouth. Interestingly, his eyes were a similar color to the shinno's, except they were lighter.

  He stepped toward her, his head cocked to one side. “Yenchin mal osshrek,” mumbled out of him.

  She watched for what he might do. His tone didn't seem to be aggressive, but she couldn't tell when she had hardly interacted with anyone from this tribe, apart from the girl who helped her, everyone had been extremely aggressive.

  He took a step closer, cocking his head to one side as he looked at her. Then his eyes lowered to her chest and flicked back up to her face, the corner of his mouth darti
ng up slightly.

  Shaya glanced down at herself and saw that the tunic she wore was wet through and through, and stuck to her, outlining the mounds of her breasts. Unfortunately her nipples also hardened from the cold and somehow she hadn’t felt it—not that she could do much if she had.

  The Alpha stepped forward again, repeating what he said before, but this time a little softer. Shaya's eyes widened as he came closer. What exactly was he going to do? She glanced behind him and no one else in the deck seemed to notice that he was approaching her. Was this part of the punishment?

  The Alpha stopped just in front of her, and lifted a hand, but before he touched her face, a harsh bellow came from the other side of the deck.

  “Bakra!” The shinno was storming toward them, and she shrunk back, fear gripping her at the pure anger in his face. He grabbed the other Alpha by the shoulder, yanking him around to face him.

  The words between them were fast and harsh—the shinno clearly angry, while the other Alpha appeared relaxed.

  Shaya's eyes flicked between them, slightly worried, but it was clear who was in charge. The other Alpha held up his hand and stepped back slightly, as though trying to be non-confrontational, but the shinno was ready to attack, stepping toward the Alpha as though preparing to rip his head off.

  The nervousness that plagued Shaya whenever the shinno was around, rose in her full force at the sight of his anger, but at the same time, a strange tingle trembled between her legs. She dropped her face, ignoring the searing pain to her arms as she did. What the hell was happening to her? The shinno's mere presence was doing things to her body that she didn't understand. Kyus had never mentioned anything like this and she couldn't tell why he had that effect on her.