Romancing the Sweet Side
Page 17
“Can you tell me what happened?”
“Snake.” Beth shuddered.
“That’s right. Can you tell me what day you were bit?”
“Tuesday.”
“That’s right. What’s your name?”
“Elsbeth Hildago. I like to be called Beth.”
“Nurse, I guess we need to correct her name in the system. How are you feeling Beth?”
“I hurt.”
“That’s to be expected. Despite your fiancé’s quick action, the venom made its way into the artery and spread throughout your system. You had a very close call. Normally, we don’t lose patients to snake bite, especially when it’s treated so fast. Unfortunately, it spread into your bloodstream because it made it into a major artery. You’ll be feeling worse side effects than normal.”
“Are you thirsty?” The nurse asked.
Beth nodded her head.
The nurse gave her some water.
Beth moved her arms and legs, but it hurt, and it burned to move her right leg.
“Where’s Jack?”
“He’s been pacing the halls since yesterday,” the nurse answered. “We tried to tell him you wouldn’t be conscious until today, but he wouldn’t leave.”
Tears welled, and Beth blinked them back.
“Can he come in?”
“We promised to tell him as soon as you were awake. I want to just listen to your heart and make a couple of more notes in the system, and then, we’ll call him in.”
“How long will I be in the hospital?”
“We’ll see how you’re doing in forty-eight hours. Your fiancé assures us that you will have round-the-clock care when you leave here. The severity of your symptoms calls for bedrest.”
Beth stopped herself in time from asking who her fiancé was. Obviously, Jack had claimed to be her intended. He’d explain why, and she didn’t want to undo whatever cover story he had made up.
The doctor placed his stethoscope onto her chest, and she froze. What had she done? She’d told them her real name.
“Are you all right? I need you to relax. Your heart is racing.”
“I’m sorry. Can you get Jack?”
“Carrie, can you ask for her Mr. Preston to come in?”
“Now, do you think you can relax?” The doctor gave her an indulgent smile. Beth took a couple of deep breaths and hoped it had slowed her heartbeat.
“Better. Okay, young lady. You need to rest. We’ll keep you under observation. We’re going to continue to give you medication for the pain. You’re lucky; I’ve seen two severe cases that have resulted in partial paralysis. Your young man really saved you.”
Beth tried to remember what happened, but it was such a blur. All that came to mind was Jack’s voice and comforting presence. With him there, she knew it was going to be okay.
“Ah, there he is,” the doctor said with a smile.
Beth looked up, and the sound of the machines fell away. She no longer was aware of anybody or anything in the hospital room but Jack Preston.
“You scared me, sweetheart.” Jack was once again giving her one of his patented warm smiles, but this time, she saw through it. He was scared, he wasn’t lying.
“Thank you. The doctor said you saved me.” He came over and grasped her hand. But it wasn’t enough; she wished he was holding her like he had the night of the thunderstorm.
“I should have been walking with you, Beth. I wasn’t thinking.” He turned her hand over and brought her palm to his lips, while butterflies took flight in her tummy. She looked around her room and found that they were alone.
She took a deep breath before she could speak.
“Why did you tell them you were my fiancé?” She asked in a whisper.
“They were only going to allow family in to see you. A fiancé was considered family.” More butterflies. “They told me you were in a lot of pain. How much do you hurt, sweetheart?”
Beth looked down at their hands. He tipped her chin up so that she was forced to meet his eyes.
“Beth, tell me.” He prompted.
“I hurt.”
He brushed his thumb over her bottom lip.
“I’m so sorry; I wish I could take the pain for you.” She felt tears welling again. She blinked but one leaked out, and he brushed it away.
“I’m going to take better care of you when you come home.”
“Jack, you’re just supposed to be protecting me.” She gripped his hand even harder.
“Please admit it is more than that. I know you’re frightened. But can you be brave enough to admit that there is something between us?”
The world stopped. She couldn’t catch her breath. She fell into his beautiful blue eyes.
“Beth?” He brushed his thumb against her lips, parting them. “Breathe, baby.”
“Yes. Oh, yes, Jack. There’s something.” She sobbed. “But I’m so scared. What if I can never be what you need.”
“You are what I need. You’re who I need. We have all the time in the world. This is just the beginning. I just need to know that you’ll try.”
She winced as her leg began to burn and then cramp.
“Ahhh, you’re hurting again.” Jack bent over and handed her the button so that she could release more pain medicine into her I.V.
“I’m going to kiss you now.”
So many more butterflies or maybe hummingbirds this time. “Okay,” Beth said as she licked her lips.
Jack groaned. Softly, he laid his lips to hers, and she gasped. Taking advantage, his tongue slid along the inside of her lower lip, teasing and tempting a response. She needed more, and he brushed from side to side, stronger as she pushed upward. Jack cupped the back of her head and brought her closer.
His tongue thrust gently, and she shuddered, the sensation unlike any other. More. She closed her eyes and sucked him in, savoring his taste and his masculine heat. Her breasts grew taut; her nipples beaded against Jack’s chest. She heard him make a sound of approval as he pulled her against him. She heard a whimper and realized it was her.
* * * *
The woman was like aged whiskey and sunflowers. She was fast becoming everything. Jack forced himself to pull back when he heard her whimper. She was ill.
“No.” She lifted her arms to wrap around his neck and groaned.
“Oh, Beth, I know you hurt. Don’t move your arms like that.”
“I didn’t want you to stop.” Her black eyes glowed. Her lips were swollen from their kiss. Jack had to fight down his reaction. For God’s sake, she’s in a hospital bed, Preston! It didn’t seem to matter; he was going to end up leaving the room with a hard-on.
“We’ll talk when you come back home. In the meantime, get some rest. I bet that medicine is making you sleepy.”
She yawned.
“Jack,” her voice came out slurred. “I like how you call the ranch home. It makes it sound like it’s my home, too.”
His gut clenched. He looked down in wonder at this woman who he had only just kissed for the first time.
“When you’re better, Beth, we’re going to need to talk about our future.”
“I know.” She yawned again, her eyes blinking slowly, a sure sign that she was close to sleep. “I’m going to leave soon. I’m damaged, and you’re such a hero.”
“I never want to hear you say you’re damaged again.” She jerked at the heat in his voice, her eyes going wide.
“Sweetheart, I’m sorry.” He cupped her cheek. “You’ve been through a trauma, and you’re working your way through it. I think you’re one of the bravest women I’ve ever met next to my mom. I’m going to have to tell you my story one day so that you know I understand where you’re coming from.”
“But...”
“No buts.” He pressed a gentle kiss to her lips until she was asleep.
“Sweet dreams, my love.”
Chapter Five
“Have you told her how you feel?�
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“It would scare her even more if I told her I love her. In the hospital, I asked her to consider a future together, and she said stupid shit about being too damaged.”
His mom had just left Beth’s room. They’d brought her back to the ranch two days ago, and it was going to take a bit of time before she was done recuperating. His mom had made sure she had finished some of the soup Rosa had made for her. Now, she was back in the great room staring at her son.
“You know feeling unworthy is part of the PTSD, right?”
“I know. I’m not pushing too hard. At least I don’t think I am. But, Mom, I can’t stand the fact that she thinks less of herself.” He brought the ottoman over and gently lifted her legs so that they rested on top of it.
“Richard had to contend with the same thing when he first met me. I didn’t think I would ever be able to have a relationship after what your father had done.”
“I just thought he had to convince you he was good enough, that he wouldn’t hurt you.” Jack thought back to his childhood years when Richard had been courting his mother.
“No, he had to help me see that I was good enough.”
Jack sat down in the chair next to his mother’s and really looked at her. It had been a long time since they had talked about the years they had spent with his real father.
“Do you still think about him? Do you still have nightmares?”
“Do you, Jack?”
He stopped himself from immediately saying “No.”
“I was on a mission last year. I won’t go into the details.”
“I’m glad. I try not to worry too much when you’re overseas, but I do. I always pray for your safe return.”
“I appreciate it. Anyway, we rescued a kid. He had just turned thirteen. He was the son of an American oil executive, and he had been kidnapped and held for ransom. The kidnapper was a sadist.”
His mother rested her hand on his knee and squeezed.
“The boy, Kevin, is doing better now.”
“You’ve been having nightmares,” she said knowingly.
“Yeah. It brought back those years with him.” Even now, he was a trained Navy SEAL, and his dreams could take him back to a scared six year old when his father was such a monster and held all the power.
“But, Mom, I don’t get it, why does Beth feel damaged? Why did you?” Looking at the beautiful woman in front of him, he couldn’t imagine her thinking of herself as damaged.
“Didn’t you? Isn’t that why you had to ride the wildest horses? Drive the fastest car? Win every fight against the biggest kids in school? Become a SEAL? Weren’t you trying to prove that you weren’t that defenseless boy?”
“To begin with, yes, but halfway through college, I wanted to start helping others. I already knew I was the baddest thing out there, and I wanted to use it in defense of others. But, Mom, I never felt that I was unlovable or somehow not worthy. I just felt powerless.”
“I think that the type of touch Beth and I endured is somehow so degrading, that you feel defiled. I don’t know how many times I rubbed myself raw in the shower, trying to get clean. I couldn’t imagine anyone else thinking I was good enough.”
Jack blinked back tears; he’d had no idea that his mother had ever felt like that.
“Then, there was the fact that I didn’t think I could ever handle a man’s touch again. It took a long time for Richard to convince me otherwise.
“Jesus, Mom. I wish I had known. That I could have helped.”
“It wasn’t something that you could have helped with. I thank God for Richard coming into my life. Into our lives. I think that Beth is going to ultimately feel the same way about you.”
“She lets me hold her. And holding Beth is better than anything else I’ve done with other women.” Jack remembered how soft and right she had felt in his arms, and he ached to have her there again.
“Then, she’s definitely the one.”
“She is, Mom, but we still have a lot of hurdles to cross. I want to help her and coax her but not pressure her. I’m just not sure I know the difference.”
“Oh honey, I trust you. You have great instincts.”
* * * *
Sometimes, it felt like Boone was the only one who understood her.
“Isn’t that right, boy?” The dog snuggled closer to her as she sat on the top step on the porch. Her emotions had been up and down for the last two days. She was still replaying that kiss in the hospital. Sometimes, she felt like there might be a future with Jack. But most of the time, she knew there couldn’t be.
Boone whined. She realized she was squeezing him too tightly.
“I’m sorry, boy. I can’t seem to do anything right.”
“I wouldn’t say that’s true.” Jack had been silent this time when he had come out onto the porch.
“Are you okay, Beth?”
“Sure.” She didn’t look up, preferring to keep her face hidden in the scruff of Boone’s neck.
“Why don’t you think you can do anything right?”
“Because I can’t.” Her fingers dug into the dog’s fur, and once again, he whined. She let go of him, and he darted down the stairs. Yep, nothing right, I can’t even keep the dog by my side.
“Beth, you’re an amazing woman. I think you’re just in a funk. It takes a while to heal.”
She laughed then winced. She hated the bitter sound that had just come out of her mouth.
“I think you need a hug.”
“Not even Boone wanted a hug from me.”
“Look up, sweetheart; there’s a rabbit in the garden. You’re never going to compete.”
“Seriously, Jack, I’m not good company.”
“Let me make my own decision.” He sat down beside her. The warmth of him felt good. She didn’t want it to.
“Beth, you know this takes time.”
“Jack, I’ve resigned myself to it never getting better. This is just too high a mountain to climb.” She pulled her knees up and rested her head over her crossed arms.
“Mom thought that. Hell, I thought that for myself.”
“Is this about your real dad?”
“It was bad. I don’t know everything that happened between Mom and Dad. From some of what she’s told me, I know it was awful.” Beth reached over and rested one hand on his shoulder.
“She tried to protect me as best she could. Dad threatened to kill me if she tried to leave. She didn’t have a job or family...
“I remember always feeling helpless. I wanted to help protect her. I hated feeling so defenseless. So weak.”
“Exactly!” Jack did understand!
“All I can tell you is that for me and my mom, it got better.”
“Your mom is stronger than I am.”
“Beth, I think the world of my mom. But you, Elsbeth Hildago, are extraordinary.”
She looked into Jack’s deep blue eyes and saw nothing but sincerity. He made her want to climb mountains.
Boone came bounding up the stairs and nearly knocked her over as he tried to snuggle up against her. Beth was soon covered in doggy kisses. She laughed freely for the first time in days.
* * * *
“I brought some ice cream for the beautiful girl.”
“Thank you.” Beth blushed.
“Is something wrong? The doctor said that after four days, the pain should be almost gone, but you look flushed.”
Beth plucked at the afghan that covered her. She was wearing a pretty pink sweater and comfy leggings that Grace had purchased for her. She had hoped that Jack would like how she looked. She’d even put on some makeup, and he had called her beautiful and she was blushing, but he thought she was sick, what should she say?
She decided on the truth. “I’m happy you think I’m beautiful.”
He winked at her and handed her the cold bowl and sat down beside her, lifting her legs over his lap.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I was hoping you would share.”
She drew in a deep breath and teased, “Get your own sundae.”
“Nope, I want you to feed me.”
Oh God, how could her palms be getting sweaty when the bowl was freezing? “You what?”
“I can’t stand it anymore, Beth. I wanted to spend time getting closer to you. A little flirting, a little touching... Can you handle that?”
She sighed in relief.
“What was that sigh for?”
“I think I’d like that.”
He cupped her cheek and smiled. “Don’t forget the ice cream.”
She scooped out some ice cream and started to lift the spoon toward Jack, and he shook his head.
“I want you to have the first bite. I want the spoon to be flavored with your taste.”
“Madre de Dios.” The bowl tilted, and Jack helped to steady it.
“Eat, baby.”
Beth savored the treat on her tongue, all the while watching Jack’s eyes as he stared at her lips.
“Now, I want some.”
She dipped her spoon and brought it to his lips. He opened his mouth and closed it gently, sucking in the ice cream. At the same time, he took over holding the bowl entirely since her hand dropped to her lap. He grasped her wrist that was holding the spoon and trailed his cold, wet tongue along her inner wrist, and she moaned.
“Jack, that feels so good.”
“That’s what I want for you, Beth. I want you to feel good.”
She heard him put the bowl on the coffee table, and he arrowed his tongue and traced her vein up toward her palm. Mesmerized, she watched as he opened his mouth and kissed her palm, but it was when his mouth opened over the flesh at the base of her thumb and then gently bit that she closed her eyes and cried out.
“So good.” Every nerve, every muscle, every part of her being was on fire. There wasn’t one part of her that was not connected to the point that Jack was currently laving with his tongue.
Beth twisted and ground her thighs together, trying to relieve the ache. Suddenly, what had seemed like a soft sweater felt itchy and was abrading her too-sensitive nipples.