The Lady Forfeits
Page 19
Her eyes were suddenly very blue in the pallor of her face as she steadily returned his gaze. ‘Of course.’
‘Thank you.’ He bowed elegantly. ‘You are, as ever, unfailingly generous in your understanding.’
Was she? At this moment she felt an uncharacteristic inclination to scream and wail at the cold remoteness of his expression and manner, when all she wanted to do was throw herself into his strong arms and have him make love to her; she felt in dire need of that evidence of his unchanged desire for her, at least.
She would do none of those things, of course. She had learnt long ago never to ask for, or to expect, the consideration of others in regard to her own emotions, but to keep her own needs to herself and her emotions firmly under her control. Except when she and Gabriel made love…
‘I shall endeavour to help in any way that I can to see that your mother’s return to full health is a smooth and untroubled one.’ Her demeanour was as cool as his own.
He inclined his head. ‘I am most appreciative of any kindness you might show her.’
That urge inside her to wail and cry became almost overwhelming as he continued to speak to her with the politeness of a stranger. They had been so wonderfully intimate earlier, which still made her blush to think of it, and yet he was now treating her as if she were nothing more than a kind and considerate friend!
Whereas she now thought of Gabriel as—as what?
Diana frowned, knowing now was not the time to search her own emotions for answers to how she felt towards him. ‘Of course. Please do not delay here any longer,’ she said. ‘Your mother may have reawakened in your absence and wondered if you being there at all was nothing but a dream.’
‘Indeed.’ Gabriel’s jaw was rigidly set as he continued to look down at her for several long seconds. Seconds when he could still read nothing from the calmness of her expression, when he wished for nothing more than to once again take her in his arms and—
‘I will wish you a good night, then, my lord,’ she added, her tone and demeanour obviously a dismissal.
Gabriel drew himself up proudly. He had felt so close to her when they’d made love earlier, had felt as if they were on the brink of—of what? Feeling real affection for each other, perhaps? An affection that might have deepened over the years, thereby making their marriage of convenience more bearable for them both.
There was no affection in Diana’s manner now. None of that earlier warmth and teasing. Instead it seemed as if there was a wall standing between them.
An insurmountable wall?
‘I cannot recall the last time I visited London…’ Mrs Felicity Faulkner’s expression was rapt as she gazed out of the carriage window at the rush and bustle, the noise, the smells, that was the capital of England; the streets were crowded with other carriages, with children dodging in between the horses, dogs barking, voices raised as women sold flowers on street corners, and men stood behind stands with hot pies and ale for sale.
None of which succeeded in impressing itself upon Diana’s inner misery in the slightest.
It had taken two further days at Faulkner Manor for Felicity to recover her wits and to have strength enough to be able to make this slow, three-day journey to London. The two days lingering at the Manor had been excruciating ones for Diana, as she saw little or nothing of Gabriel, and was treated with cool politeness by him whenever they did chance to meet over the breakfast or dinner table. He had been, as he had predicted, excessively busy with estate business, his expression becoming grimmer by the hour, it seemed, as he obviously found further discrepancies in his mother’s account books.
Felicity was as delightful as Gabriel had led Diana to believe; a beautiful and vivacious woman who, although sorely tried emotionally for so many years, had quickly recovered her full spirits once she was no longer being plagued with heavy doses of laudanum and could enjoy the return of her son. She was also overjoyed to learn of his inheritance of the title and estates of the Earl of Westbourne.
Forbidden by Gabriel to so much as mention either of the Prescotts to his mother, Diana often took refuge in discussing Shoreley Park with the older woman as a means of avoiding talking about more personal subjects. Something that had not proved too difficult to do when it emerged that Gabriel, no doubt for reasons of his own, had so far not told Felicity of their betrothal; as far as his mother was concerned, Diana was only the eldest of her son’s wards.
Perhaps he had every intention of being asked to be released from that betrothal once they were back in London? She couldn’t help wondering miserably. If that were to happen then not one, but two men would have passed her over as their choice for a wife; Malcolm because he had met and wooed a woman who could bring wealth rather than a title to their marriage, and Gabriel because their betrothal had only ever been a matter of convenience to him from the first. A betrothal he obviously no longer found convenient or necessary.
The more Diana’s thoughts dwelt on those two rejections the angrier she became. How dare they? How dare those men discard her as if she were no more than a pair of boots that no longer fit them comfortably? Quite when Gabriel intended to ask her officially to release him from their betrothal she had no idea, but the past five days, spent in an agony of emotions, meant that she now had plenty of things she wished to say to him once he did decide to do so. So many, in fact, that she had no idea whether she would be able to stop that flow of words once they had begun.
‘You seem pensive, my dear?’
Diana turned from gazing out of the window to look across the carriage at Felicity. ‘I am sorry if I am being less than companionable, but there is a slight family…disturbance, which occupies all of my thoughts at present.’ Not completely true, when what she wished to say to Gabriel kept her so mentally exhausted, but the nearer they came to London the more her thoughts returned to her missing sister Elizabeth. They had received no news at Faulkner Manor on that subject, from either Caroline or Lord Vaughn, and so Diana could only assume that Elizabeth was still missing. Lost and alone somewhere in this noisy, smelly metropolis…
More than anything she now wished to return to Shoreley Park, if only to lick her wounds in private; something she could not do until they had found and returned Elizabeth to the safety of their family.
Felicity’s kind face softened in understanding. ‘Gabriel has explained to me the…situation—’ she glanced at Diana’s maid also seated in the carriage with them, ‘—concerning your sister.’
Her eyes widened. ‘He has?’
‘Oh, yes.’ The older woman smiled. ‘Gabriel takes his role as guardian to you and your sisters very seriously indeed.’
His role as her guardian…
When Diana wanted so much more from him! She wanted a return of the man who had made such beautiful love to her five nights ago and she still wanted to become his wife, in the hopes that he might one day come to truly care for her.
As she truly cared for him…
Her feelings for Gabriel were something she had not questioned too often these past few days. Love, once acknowledged, even to oneself, could no longer be ignored, so she refused to look deeply enough into her feelings to know whether or not it was love she felt for him. Besides, surely if she were in love with him, she would not also feel this overwhelming urge to pummel her fists upon his chest whilst calling him a long list of names that would no doubt be more suited to coming from the lips of a fisherman’s wife?
‘I appreciate his concern,’ she replied tightly.
His mother looked wistful. ‘I wish you could have known him before any of this unpleasantness occurred. He was so much kinder then, so generous with his affections.’ She shook her head sadly.
And in return for that kindness and generosity of affection, he had been disinherited and banished by his family and society. Was it any wonder that he had become the hard and cynical man he was today? she thought. ‘He is still kind and generous in his affections towards you,’ Diana pointed out.
‘Oh, he is.�
�� Deep-blue eyes, so like her son’s, became awash with unshed tears. ‘I only wish… My husband was not really such a hard or unforgiving man, Diana. It pained him so much to be that way with Gabriel. I am sure, if Neville had lived longer, that he and Gabriel would have eventually made their peace with each other.’
Diana knew that mother and son had visited his father’s grave together before they’d departed. Gabriel’s expression had been one of such grim emotion on his return to the house that Diana had not dared to so much as speak to him before he’d disappeared into his father’s study and had not reappeared again until it was time for dinner two hours later, his demeanour then still so remote that she had felt it best to leave him to his own reflections.
She reached across the carriage now to squeeze the other woman’s hand. ‘I am sure of it, too.’
Felicity shook off her sadness. ‘Now I am come to London and am to become reacquainted with your Aunt Humphries. Dorothea and I were such firm friends in our youth, you know,’ she confided warmly.
Diana smiled. ‘So she has told me.’
‘Not all, I am sure.’ Felicity looked far less than her fifty-two years as she smiled mischievously. ‘Dorothea was considered something of an Original, you know.’
‘Aunt Humphries was?’ Diana could not hide her surprise at this disclosure; her aunt had always given the impression of being just a little shy of prudish.
‘Oh, yes,’ Felicity said. ‘In truth, all of the ton was surprised when she accepted the offer of Captain Humphries, not only a man so much older than her, but one who could also be very stern on occasion.’
‘I believe they were very happy in their marriage.’
‘Oh, I do so hope they were!’ Felicity’s concern for her old friend’s happiness was sincere. ‘I truly cannot wait to see Dorothea again and catch up on all that has happened in her life these past thirty years.’
And Diana would be just as happy to be relieved of the company; the nearer they had come to London the more difficult it had become for her to hide her true feelings towards Gabriel from his mother. Especially when she did not understand that confusing mix of anger, warmth and despair herself!
Gabriel was tired, stiff and not a little bad-tempered as he stepped down from Maximilian’s broad back before handing the reins to one of the grooms who had hurried round from the stables of Westbourne House to greet them.
The first of two discomforts was caused from the many hours he had spent in the saddle, and the latter from an ever-increasing frustration with Diana’s recent avoidance of even making polite conversation with him on the few occasions they had been together.
He had hoped—a complete arrogance on his part, no doubt—that with time she might come to feel more warmly towards him again; instead her manner had become cooler with each day that had passed, to the point she now seemed to avoid his company altogether whenever possible.
The stigma of his past so-called scandal had not deterred her from agreeing to marry him—no doubt the kindness of her nature meant she had seen him as a lost soul in need of saving. Learning that the wife of his uncle was the woman from his past had not shaken her composure for too long, either. No, it seemed that discovering Gabriel’s pride and arrogance had resulted in his mother’s misery and incarceration had finally been too much for the sensitive and kind-hearted Diana to bear. After all, he thought unhappily, it was that very same arrogance that had initially prompted him to propose to whichever of the Copeland sisters would have him.
‘You are returned at last, Diana!’
The two ladies barely had time to step down from the carriage before the front door of Westbourne House was thrown open and an excited Caroline ran lightly down the steps to greet her sister with an enthusiasm that attested to their deep affection for each other.
‘Mrs Faulkner.’ Caroline curtsied politely once Diana had made the introductions. ‘My lord.’ Caroline’s tone cooled slightly as she turned to give him a brief nod of acknowledgement.
No change there, then, Gabriel acknowledged ruefully as he joined the ladies and returned her nod. Even Dominic’s championing of Gabriel could not change Caroline’s opinion that he was not in the least good enough for her beloved sister.
An opinion Gabriel now shared.
‘It is so good to have you back with us in London.’ Caroline linked her arm through her sister’s as the three ladies preceded Gabriel up the steps to the house. ‘And you will never guess who else has come to town?’ Her eyes sparkled a deep sea-green as she looked at Diana excitedly.
‘I am sure I do not need to guess when you are obviously in such a lather to tell me,’ she returned drily.
‘Malcolm Castle!’ Caroline did exactly that, her face aglow with the enormity of the announcement. ‘He called for the first time four days ago, and he has been back every day since in the hopes of learning that you are returned from Cambridgeshire!’
Gabriel’s step faltered as he overheard this news, his heart sinking as he realised the significance of this information. Had that young man now realised his mistake and come in search of Diana in the hopes of renewing his courtship?
Chapter Fifteen
‘I trust you are not going to be difficult about releasing my sister from your betrothal?’
Gabriel closed his eyes briefly before opening them again, the return to the neat view of the garden outside the study window doing little to soothe the blackness of his mood. How could it, when every time he looked out at this garden he would remember that it was Diana who had instructed the gardeners on how she wanted it to appear? Everything about this house had been lovingly restored to its former glory under her instruction—
‘Are you deaf, my lord, or merely choosing to ignore me?’
Just as Caroline would always and for evermore be Diana’s champion! That would prove awkward for all of them if—when Gabriel’s betrothal to Diana came to an end, and Caroline and Dominic were married.
He turned slowly, his expression remaining impassive as he took in the flushed irritation on Caroline’s beautiful face as she glared across the room at him. ‘I am neither deaf nor ignoring you, Caroline,’ he said silkily.
‘Well?’
‘Well what?
She stepped into the study before closing the door firmly behind her. ‘Is it your intention to release Diana from your betrothal without undo fuss?’
Gabriel’s mouth compressed. ‘To my knowledge, your sister has made no such request of me.’
Those sea-green eyes widened. ‘But surely you must know that she will do so?’
‘Must I?’ he said evasively.
She scowled at him. ‘I do not believe you to be either stupid or insensitive.’
‘I am gratified to hear it!’
She gave an impatient snort. ‘You are being deliberately obtuse—’
‘On the contrary, my dear, Caroline, I am trying—and obviously not succeeding—to understand what business it is of yours how or indeed if my betrothal to Diana should come to an end.’ He looked witheringly at her.
True to character, Caroline did not back down in the slightest. ‘It became my business, my lord, the moment my sister, a woman who never cries, only minutes ago began to sob in my arms as if her heart would break!’
Those words were like a sword wound in Gabriel’s own chest. He and Diana had parted just over an hour ago, she to go upstairs with her sister, Gabriel to see to his mother’s safe delivery to the comfort of her bed-chamber where, to his mother’s obvious delight, Alice Britton was waiting to welcome her, which Gabriel had arranged whilst still at the Manor. The joy on his mother’s face as the two women were reunited was enough to show him in that, at least, he had acted correctly.
Just as he would have to do by releasing Diana from their betrothal?
Diana had assured him when they’d agreed to marry that there was not even the possibility of her ever reuniting with Castle. But it had been a denial she had made in the abstract, in the confidence that it would never happen;
her distressed state at learning Castle wished to see her again was evidence of her true feelings in the matter.
Caroline eyed him warily. ‘Does it not bother you in the least to learn that Diana is inconsolable?’
He drew his breath in sharply at the mere thought of her in such an agony of emotions. ‘Of course it bothers me!’ A nerve pulsed in his tightly clenched jaw. ‘I am insulted that you might think it would not. I assure you I have no wish to ever cause Diana the slightest discomfort.’
Those sea-green eyes widened in shock. ‘I believe you really mean that,’ she said wonderingly.
Gabriel scowled. ‘I find the disbelief in your tone positively insulting.’
Her expression became quizzical. ‘You seem changed since last we spoke, Gabriel.’
His expression became guarded. ‘Changed how?’
‘Less forceful. Less unyielding. Certainly less arrogant,’ she added with a teasing smile.
‘Really?’ Gabriel rallied drily. ‘I am sure your sister will be gratified to hear it!’
‘As are we all,’ she responded. ‘I trust that you will speak with her then?’
He nodded. ‘You may.’
His expression became grimmer still once she had departed the study, as he contemplated the upcoming—but very necessary—conversation with her elder sister.
‘Has that cushion offended you in some way?’
Diana stiffened at the first sound of Gabriel’s voice, turning sharply now from where she sat on the chaise to see him standing in the open doorway of her bed-chamber, dark brows raised over mocking blue eyes.
He had changed from his dusty travelling clothes and now wore a dark-blue superfine, a lighter-blue waistcoat, beige pantaloons and shiny black Hessians, the darkness of his hair still slightly damp from his ablutions.