Giving Up the Ghost

by Magenta Wilde

  “I don’t feel like dealing with your usual crap.” Roger reached toward the steering wheel, tapping it. “Come on. Stop.”

  “No!” Wyatt yelled. He jerked his elbow in Roger’s direction and his hand hit the wheel and the car zigzagged across the road.

  “Watch out!” Ivy screeched. “There’s a deer!”

  Wyatt slammed the brakes in response as a large stag stood ahead, illuminated in the sports car’s high beams. The car skidded and spun out of control. I wanted to shriek as Ivy screamed, and braced for impact. I heard tires screeching and felt nauseated as the car slammed sideways into a tree. Then I felt nothing, only seeing blackness descend as if a heavy curtain had fallen over me.

  A moment later I stood in the middle of the road, looking around me. I felt my face, neck, torso, and then looked down at my legs and feet. I expected to be a bloodied mess, but I felt no pain and saw no sign of injury. I realized I was now a spectator. Perhaps the impact from the crash – whether I was really taken back to that moment or experienced it through a memory, I couldn’t be sure – but I was once again separate from Ivy. I also realized I had just relived, so to speak, the accident that had claimed her life.

  I looked over to the sports car first, and saw Wyatt, dazed, and struggling to extract himself from the vehicle. He had bruises and cuts all over his face, but seemed in good shape, considering. The rear passenger side was wrapped around the tree the car had collided with, and the front window was smashed out.

  I turned and looked for Roger and Ivy. A couple car lengths ahead, I saw him limping toward the young girl who lay in the middle of the road, bloodied and writhing with pain. I thought of a broken bird after it had flown into a window. Roger bent over the girl, his hands gently cupping her head as if she were the most fragile thing on earth. “Ivy! Ivy! Are you okay? Talk to me.”

  She didn’t respond for a moment and then groaned. “Roger? What happened? I hurt. It’s so bad,” she croaked out.

  “We crashed,” he choked out.

  “Are you okay,” she asked.

  “I got knocked around a bit. I’ll be sore, but I’m fine. I’m worried about you.”

  Her pale eyes were glassy as she stared up into his face. Blood trickled from her nose and her mouth. She raised a finger. “I can barely move,” she gurgled.

  “Just lie still. We’ll get help,” Roger choked, trying not to sob. “Don’t move and the paramedics will fix you up. I’ll be with you. Wyatt? Are you okay?” Roger called out to his brother.

  “I think so. I found my phone. I’m trying to call for help,” he groaned. “I’m sorry, so sorry,” he paused, sniffling back tears. “How’s Ivy? How are you?”

  “I can’t feel anything,” Ivy muttered.

  “No!” Roger gasped.

  “That’s okay,” Ivy comforted him. “It’s not hurting anymore. That’s nice.” She murmured. Her eyes were losing focus.

  “Stay with me, Ivy!” Roger ordered, lowering his head to her face, their foreheads touching. “Just stay awake.”

  “I don’t think I can, Roger. I’m feeling … so tired.” Her eyes fluttered closed for a full minute, then she re-opened them. “Don’t forget me, Roger. Don’t ever let me go…”

  Her features relaxed and she went silent as her eyes lost the last spark of life.

  Roger gently patted her cheek and repeatedly uttered her name, trying to rouse her. After a few moments, he checked her wrist and her neck for a pulse, and gave her mouth to mouth. He checked again, and shook his head as tears ran down his cheeks. He turned to look at Wyatt, who had made his way over and stood staring over Roger’s shoulder.

  “So much for being grounded,” Roger spat.

  “There was a deer in the road,” Wyatt muttered, more to himself, as he turned and limped away, plopping down along the side of the road as he held his head in his hands.

  Roger scooped up Ivy’s lifeless body and pressed her close to him, rocking her. The woods were hushed, the silence reverent, around the two brothers as Roger sobbed into the girl’s hair and Wyatt stared into space.

  I let out a shuddering sigh and sank down to the ground, and let my tears flow.

  29

  “What was that?” Roger asked as we were jolted to the present. He stood up and lost his footing for a moment, he’d risen so quickly in alarm.

  “I think we got a view of the past. This is where …” I paused, struggling to find a gentle way to put it, “where Ivy passed?”

  “Yes. But why did we go through that?” His eyes darted around and landed on Ivy, who was kneeling next to me, this time her expression keen and her eyes trained on him.

  “You can see me now, can’t you, Roger?” she asked.

  He nodded.

  “Poppy has been able to see me since you first walked into her store.”

  “So that’s true?” he asked, glancing from me to Ivy. “I found it hard to believe.”

  “Yes. I can see some ghosts,” I admitted. “I think you wanted to believe. At least part of you did.”

  “Scott has said you could see things, but I thought – or maybe hoped – he was smoking too much pot,” Roger stammered.

  Ivy brightened for a moment. “Oh, the cute one? I wish he would have kissed you back at the movies, Poppy. I so wanted to make out with him.”

  Roger looked at his sister, then at me. “Wait? What are you saying? He’s at least twice your age, Ivy!”

  “That’s what you’re focusing on?” I deadpanned.

  Roger looked sheepish. “She’ll always be my little sister”

  “Let’s put talk of making out aside,” I started, “I was putting that eucalyptus out to ward off Ivy...”

  “Yeah, what was that all about?” she interrupted.

  “You were trying to take over my body!” I seethed. “That’s rude, for starters!”

  “Oh, I just wanted to fool around with Scott for a bit. That’s harmless.”

  “It is far from harmless,” I huffed. “You were trying to force my body to do something my mind didn’t want it to do! And I was inside, aware of every minute of it! Would you want someone to treat you that way?”

  Ivy looked down, fiddling with something on her shirt. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think of it that way.”

  “So,” Roger started, turning his gaze to me. “When you were kissing Scott, it really wasn’t you that was kissing Scott? Is that what you’re saying? And you weren’t after his Milk Duds.”

  I nodded. “Can you see why I was reluctant to explain?”

  “Yes.” Roger paused for a moment and then looked to Ivy. “Have you been around all along, or did Poppy call you? I know Mom said she had gone to Poppy for a reading.”

  “I’ve been around you all along, Roger. Poppy didn’t do anything. She just saw me and talked to me. You’re the one who’s called me, and kept me around all these years.” Ivy crossed her arms and leveled a stern gaze at him. “You told me to stay!”

  “You asked me never to let you go,” Roger pressed.

  Ivy sighed. “I meant it more like, ‘Hold me until I fall asleep.’ I thought it was obvious.”

  “You don’t look happy with me,” Roger said.

  “I’m not,” Ivy agreed. “I’ve been around you for all these years, trapped, because you spend so much time moping about me.”

  “Ivy, you died in my arms.”

  “I know that, Rog. And I’ll love you forever for caring so much, but you need to move on. Do you know what I did when I found out Poppy could see me?” She raised herself up and set her hands on her hips. “I asked her to help you let me go.”

  “Really? I didn’t know I was … holding you, what, captive?” Roger said.

  “In a way, you were,” Ivy said. “You’re sad; you feel responsible. And I know you’re kicking yourself for letting Wyatt drive – there are so many crazy emotions surrounding you – that I … ” Ivy looked to me as she sought the right words.

  “Your grief acted as some kind of net, holding her here,�
� I cut in.

  “That doesn’t make sense to me,” Roger said.

  I’d been sitting, but I stood to get off the cold road, and continued. “You know how a ghost is said to linger when, for example they’ve been murdered, and there’s unfinished business?”

  Roger nodded.

  “This is sort of like that. But there’s not any unfinished business,” I continued, “except that you refused to be finished with this business. She died very young, and it’s normal to grieve. When you love someone, you never really get over losing them, but you heal and move on. There’s usually a balance to these things, and I think you upset that balance and trapped Ivy close to you. Plus, I think you may have some kind of psychic ability to be able to do that.”

  Roger looked doubtful.

  I continued. “Your mother came into my shop. A couple times, in fact. She actually saw and spoke with Ivy the last time she visited.”

  Roger looked to his sister for confirmation. She nodded.

  “But she died so young,” Roger continued. “She never got a chance to graduate high school or go to college. She never dated. She never got a chance to fall in love or get married. If she were alive now, she might be married and have a baby, for all we know.”

  “I’d be twenty-three, now, Rog. I hope I wouldn’t be a mother just yet,” Ivy snorted.

  “You know what I mean.”

  Ivy sighed. “That’s true, and I do sometimes feel sad about it, but what makes me feel worse is seeing you stuck in your own sadness. You have dated a bit and lived your life – sort of – but it’s been kind of limited. You’ve had a chance to do the things I’ve lost the opportunity to do, and you’ve been squandering them. Like, don’t forget me, Rog, but don’t carry me around with you all the time.”

  I could see Roger was really listening to what Ivy was saying to him. I wasn’t sure, but I think something was even getting through to him. A few shreds of doubt still hovered over him, however.

  “But,” he began. “Where do you go? What kind of life – is that how you’d put it? – is there for you now?”

  Ivy turned to me. “I’m not sure, but, according to Poppy, word is that there is a lot I can do.”

  Roger turned to me, his expression cloudy. “How do you know?”

  “If I can see one ghost, wouldn’t you think I could see others?” I asked.

  Roger shrugged. “I guess.” He still looked doubtful. I didn’t like that.

  “Let’s see if I can show you. Dad!” I bellowed out, my voice echoing into the woods surrounding us. “Are you around?” Without magical tools, I wasn’t sure if he’d get the message.

  A moment later, my father’s ghostly form appeared and made his way between myself and Ivy.

  “Hi Dad. I’m glad you could come.”

  “I was nearby,” he said, adjusting his glasses. “I sensed something traumatic had happened to you, so I was watching from the sidelines to make sure all was okay.” He turned to me. “So, Poppy, is this the girl who you were telling me about?”

  “Yes. Roger, can you see my father’s ghost?”

  He looked shocked at my father’s luminescent form. “I do see him. But how?”

  “It’s the oil,” I said. “You got it on your hand when the vial broke, and then rubbed it over your eye. I think it mixed with your blood, so that added a bit of extra psychic juice.” I waited a moment, waiting for it to sink in.

  Finally, Roger bobbed his head and gave a curt nod to acknowledge my father. “I can see you, sir. It’s good to meet you.”

  “Okay, Roger, Ivy,” I started, “this is my dad. He’s been gone for fifteen years, but still visits me from time to time.”

  “Young lady,” he nodded at Ivy. “I’ve heard what you’ve been going on about. I heard you screaming when you went through all that some moments ago,” my father started. “Son,” he started as he turned to Roger. “We all die sooner or later. Now, don’t even ask me about heaven or hell. Just try to be a good person. That’s all you need to know on that front.

  “The afterlife,” he went on, “still offers some sort of life there. It isn’t a bad place. It’s just different. Let your sister move on. There’s so much that awaits her in the beyond. And there’s so much that awaits you in this world. Let her have that. And let yourself have something good, too.” He inclined his head in my direction and winked at Roger.

  “Hey!” I yelped, teenage embarrassment surging through me. “Are you dropping some not-so-subtle hints? And here? And now? Why is everyone working so hard to get me paired up.”

  “What?” Dad shrugged. “You’re thirty already.”

  “I don’t have an expiration date,” I snapped.

  My father ignored the comment and continued. “Poppy, you clearly like him, and from what I’ve seen of Roger here, he clearly likes you. I’m dead. Cut me some slack.”

  I shrugged.

  “Plus it’ll get your mother off your back,” Dad added.

  I nodded, gazing downward. “There is something to that,” I agreed, casting a quick glance in Roger’s direction. He looked conflicted, but it appeared what my father was saying was reaching him. Ivy looked hopeful, and had her eyes fixed on her brother.

  “Son,” Dad, said, laying a ghostly arm on Roger’s shoulder. Roger reacted with surprise at the feel of his ghostly fingers. “You can let your sister go. She’ll be fine, and she can always visit. Especially with Poppy around, who’s a really good conduit for spirits. Too good, in some ways.” He shook a ghostly finger as he admonished Ivy. “Young lady, you need to stay out of people’s heads. Possession lands you in a very bad place in the afterlife. We also call it identity theft, and we take it quite seriously on our side, so I’d advise you not to take it any further.”

  Ivy turned her eyes down, ashamed, and mumbled an apology.

  My father turned back to Roger. “With Poppy, you’ll never have Ivy completely out of your life, but it’s time you have a life of your own, too.”

  Roger looked from my dad to me, and then to his sister. His face crumpled as he fought back tears. He turned his face downward and trembled violently as he sobbed into his hand.

  Ivy turned to me and my father. “Can I get a moment here? Please?”

  I nodded and stepped away with Dad matching my stride.

  “Do you think he’ll be okay?” I asked.

  “I think he will be. He needs time.”

  I gave a small snort. “He’s had plenty. Shit.” Dad shot me a quelling look. He never did like it when women swore. “I mean, shoot. That sounded mean, didn’t it?” I looked over my shoulder, hoping I hadn’t been overheard. I think I was safe. Ivy had her hands on Roger’s forearms, and was explaining something to him. He responded with nods now and then.

  “It was a bit mean, but you do take after your mother in some ways after all.”

  “Hey!” I snapped. “That was mean of you. Maybe I get it from you. Or a double dose from the both of you.”

  My father chuckled. “You probably do get it from both of us. But I know what you were implying,” Dad said. “I think he’ll need days, not years, though. Seeing Ivy like this – and not broken and dying in the road – and saying goodbye will help him tremendously.”

  Dad and I turned and watched the brother and sister from afar. She reached a translucent hand up to his cheek, patting it in a nurturing way, and then held her arms outstretched. He stepped into her arms and she wrapped her ghostly arms around him, managing to keep solid enough form to envelope him for a moment. Then she let him go, nodded, and faded from view.

  Roger glanced in our direction, gave a weak wave, and then turned away. I could see he was trying to collect himself.

  “I guess I’ll give him a minute,” I whispered to my father.

  “You do that,” he agreed. “I think he’ll be okay now. I think you will be, too.”

  Ivy reappeared by my father’s side, her gaze questioning. “Come on, young lady,” he said, offering a ghostly palm. She rested her hand i
n his. “Let’s go. I’ll give you a tour, and we’ll go find your grandma.”

  She smiled at me and uttered a thank you. Then, in the blink of an eye the ghostly duo was gone, and Roger and I stood alone along the road.

  I turned toward the truck and saw it still in the ditch. I wondered if I should fire it up and try to get it out, or if I should leave Roger to do it.

  I felt a hand, warm and gentle on my shoulder. I turned and saw Roger, his eyes moist and wearing a hesitant smile on his face. He slipped my phone into my hand. “You dropped that back there.”

  “Thanks. Are you okay?” I asked, my voice weak.

  “Sort of,” he said. “I feel like I’ve been sucker punched, but also like I had a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.”

  “Well, you have,” I consoled. I reached out and rested my hand on his upper arm.

  He suddenly reached out and pulled me in for a hug. “Thanks,” he whispered into my ear as he rocked me back and forth. “I needed that. All of it.”

  “My pleasure. Does it make up for me driving your truck into a ditch?” I hedged, adding, “I’ll pay for any damages.”

  “We’ll be fine. I should be able to get it out without much issue. Just give me another minute and I’ll get to work on it.”

  “Take all the time you need.”

  I heard what sounded like a car off in the distance, and looked in the direction we’d been heading. Lights appeared down the road and we stepped off to the side. A couple moments later a white car came rumbling along, slowing to a stop as it got closer to us. The driver’s door opened, and Trish stepped out.

  “There you are!” she called to us. “I was going to ask where you’ve been, but I guess you had complications.”

  “Did we ever,” I said, as I approached her. Roger went to his truck and climbed inside, firing the engine up and working to extract the vehicle from the ditch.

  “Are you okay?” she asked. “You look like you’ve been through something. So does he.” She reached a hand out to me, clasping my shoulder. “Are you hurt?”

  “I think we’re good,” I started. “I saw something in the road and lost control of the truck, landing us in the ditch.”