Seeing You

by Michelle Lynn

  “Are you okay?” Todd whispers as he backs up to see my face.

  I dislodge from his embrace and step away. “I’m fine.”

  “What’s the story between you and that asshole?” Todd asks.

  All Todd knows is that Cam was my boyfriend. The only thing Todd witnessed, standing there in front of his apartment door, was me throwing shit at Cam as he ran down the hall until I slammed my door shut. Todd never asked me more about it, but the next morning, there were chocolate chip cookies at my door with a note that said, We’re dicks.

  “Was he physical?”

  We turn the opposite way than everyone else, and I know we should be on our way to Jim’s by now.

  “No!” I screech.

  Inhaling a big breath, I meet Todd’s inquiring eyes and figure he has to know the truth, as embarrassing as it is. My hands ball next to me until my fingernails are digging into my palms.

  “Okay, I had a serious boyfriend in college. We loved each other and didn’t let anything get in between us—until graduation.” I pause, gathering the nerve to continue. “After we graduated, I went right into getting my master’s, and my boyfriend, Bryce, went into the job market. He got lucky and quickly nailed a consulting job at Kros and Bridgers—or so we thought.”

  “Bryce Billings?”

  “How did you know?” I look up and almost get lost in his sorrowful eyes.

  “I’m sorry,” he sympathizes. “Bryce was working with Davis when I was hired on. Davis had him there when they interviewed me. I only remember because he gave me his business card at the end and whispered that when I’m ready to start my own restaurant, to give him a call. I did, and the office told me he had passed away.”

  “I can’t believe . . .” Then, I recollect Bryce telling me about some hot new chef. “I vaguely remember him talking about Davis.”

  “Bryce seemed like a good guy.” He swings his arm around my shoulders. A warmth puddles in my stomach.

  “When he started there, things were great. Bryce was making more money than we ever thought possible, but soon, he got caught up in his newfound world.” I stop, gaining more strength to tell Todd the worst part. “Cam’s dad owns the firm.” My heart slams against my chest, waiting for Todd to put two and two together.

  His arm loosens around me for a second. He’s figured it out, and I’m sure he’ll think I’m as pathetic as I do.

  “Cam took Bryce under his wing. Bryce started not coming home all the time, and he was always going to Vegas or Miami. I became secondary, to a degree. Don’t get me wrong. He’d take me out and buy me things to make up for disappointments. I stupidly allowed him to mask the problems. I chalked it up to him having to pay his dues for a few years. You know, wine and dine the clients, but I thought, eventually, it would all calm down.”

  Todd leads us over to a bench in a small park, and we sit down.

  “Where does Cam fit in?”

  “After he . . . died, Bryce’s parents wanted him sent back up to Michigan to be buried. Cam came up, and his dad paid for the whole wake and funeral, which was nice since Bryce’s parents didn’t have much money. Once I returned, Cam started calling me and stopping by to see how I was holding up. Before I realized it, the friendship turned into more, and . . . well, you can figure out the rest.”

  “Why did you and Cam break up?”

  I exhale a stream of air. “We were never really public. At first, I was worried that people wouldn’t understand because it was soon after Bryce had passed away, and then I guess Cam grew to prefer his two lives—the one with those who were here today and the one with me. He never crossed the two.” I fear my attempt in expressing a don’t-care attitude will only reveal how badly it hurt. “One day, I just snapped. There was no particular reason, except that I was sick of being some damn hideaway. I changed my locks since he had a key, and I also changed my phone number. He gave up after a short time, like I knew he would.”

  “Did you love him?” His voice cracks.

  I’ve dealt with these issues, and although it feels good to be out in the open with Todd, it never feels good to relive those moments.

  Hi, I’m Amelia. The man who I thought was the love of my life died in a stripper’s lap from a heart condition he didn’t know he had, and I fell in love with his best friend.

  Embarrassingly, it took me entirely too long to realize that Cam was just slumming it with me with no intention of having a serious relationship.

  “No, I don’t think I truly did.”

  A small smile crosses Todd’s lips before he hides it. “It’s over. Like I said, we’re dicks.”

  “I don’t think you are.” I scoot closer and cuddle into the heat of his sheltering arms.

  It takes a minute before he rests his hand on my shoulder, securing me to him.

  “You have no idea,” he says.

  My head rises and falls with his shallow breaths.

  We sit on the park bench and watch people pass by. Some are rambling on their cell phones, and others are lost in their phones with their heads down. After the worst day, it’s ending better.

  How did Todd and I go from neighbors to close friends in only a matter of months?

  I try hard not to think about it, and instead, I cherish the serenity I feel with him. We sit for a few minutes then I remember where Todd needs to be. This friendship we’re developing goes both ways.

  I stand and hold my hand out. He looks at it, but doesn’t get up.

  “Come on. We need to go to Jim’s.”

  A slow grin breaks his lips and he accepts my hand.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  Amelia

  The next evening, Davis parks at Coney Island. First, he runs through everything for his show. I watch him talking to the organizer. She’s an attractive woman, who is clearly loving this part of her job. Her hand continues to touch his forearm, and a giddy laugh escapes her lips nearly every minute. Finally, he finishes and walks over to me, and the lady’s eyes appraise me up and down. I focus on Davis’s lit-up face coming right toward me. Sorry, but he’s mine. At least for tonight.

  He buys two tickets, and we wait in line. Our bucket comes down, and Davis waits for me to sit first before he follows. He rests his arm around my shoulders, and I sink into the comfort of him.

  “What an amazing view,” I say.

  Davis mumbles an agreement as the sun dips down past the ocean. “I’ve been on this Ferris wheel plenty of times in my life, but it’s never been as beautiful as it is tonight.”

  “It’s the sunset.”

  “It’s you.” He pushes my shoulder and pulls me toward him. His lips brush the top of my head.

  I don’t respond, but I’m sure he can see how his words affect me by the redness filling my cheeks.

  “Amelia,” he whispers.

  I turn.

  “Before we go on, there’s something I need to tell you.” His eyes don’t reflect the desire I thought I would find, but rather, there’s a painful expression.

  My body instinctively scoots away, but he tightens his hold on my shoulder. Part of me doesn’t want to know.

  Does he not want to continue this? Does he have a wife? Does he want to keep me holed up like Cam did? Relax, Amelia.

  Too many questions arise, and I instantly know I need to find out. “What?”

  “That wasn’t Cam’s fiancée yesterday. It’s his sister.”

  “Oh. I assumed it was his fiancée, but it doesn’t really matter. It might have taken me a while to get over him, but I am now.” I swivel around and place my hand on his cheek. “Thank you for telling me, though.”

  “I want to know you’re with me because you don’t want to be anywhere else.”

  No one has ever wanted that from me. I crash my lips to his to prove how much I want to be with him. He grabs my hips and brings me toward him. I thrust my tongue into his mouth, and I’m rewarded with a groan. His hands run up my back until he has fistfuls of my hair. He manipulates my head exactly where he wants it, and
his lips devour my neck.

  By the time we reach the bottom, I’m practically straddling Davis while his hands are mere inches from my breasts.

  “Crap.” I hop off him and sit back on the bench.

  He chuckles. “I almost forgot about the bumper boats.”

  “I think I’m already wet enough,” I tease.

  Instead of earning a laugh from Davis, a painful groan escapes his mouth, and he shifts in the seat.

  “Why, Mr. Morgan, I’m liking the effect I have on you.” I give him one more kiss before the guy opens our door.

  “Me, too, Miss Fiore.” He steps out of the compartment and holds his hand out for me.

  Davis buys us burgers and fries along with ice cream cones. We forgo the bumper boats, as it’s gotten colder since the sun went down. We stroll hand in hand along the boardwalk and back to the parking garage.

  A looming feeling comes over me. I don’t want to say goodnight to Davis. It’s the first time in a long time that I wish the night would never end. I wish we were going to the same apartment to wake up in each other’s arms tomorrow morning.

  Davis double-parks outside my apartment building. He puts his hazard lights on and escorts me to the door. “I had a great time.” He rests his forehead against mine.

  “Me, too. Do you want to come up?” I bite my lip as the fear of rejection roars its ugly head.

  “I wish, but I have to be back at Coney Island early tomorrow. Next time?” His fingers gently skim along my shoulder.

  “De-definitely,” I stutter.

  He bends down, and his lips softly touch mine. The kiss is sweet and gentle, and Davis stops it before it gets out of hand.

  “Thank you for everything,” I say.

  “You’re very welcome. Goodnight, Amelia.” He kisses my forehead and steps back to his car.

  I lean against the door and watch him slide into the driver’s seat.

  He inches forward and rolls down the passenger window. “Go in. I want to make sure you’re safe.”

  I laugh and give him a wave. A warmth spreads through my body while I venture into my condo building.

  I walk to my door with a goofy smile stuck on my face.

  My footsteps stop when I find Todd sitting on the ground outside my door. “What are you doing here?”

  “Waiting for you.” He stands.

  Why wouldn’t he wait in his own apartment?

  I spot a crumbled piece of paper in his hands.

  “Oh, shit!” I cover my mouth. “I left my phone at the restaurant. I’m sorry. I was out with Davis.”

  “I figured.” He rolls his eyes.

  “What’s up with you today?” I insert my key into the lock.

  “Noodle.” He waits for my undivided attention.

  I open my door and hold it for him to follow.

  “I’m sorry. Here.” He shoves a page from some local magazine into my hand.

  There’s a picture of Davis with his arms around a news anchor lady, Annabelle Rhys, from channel five. The headline reads, A Match Made in Brooklyn.

  The keys drop from my hand, and my stomach clenches with a sharp pain. I look up at a sympathetic Todd.

  He grabs me hard and yanks me to his chest. “He’s a prick. If he doesn’t know how good he has it with you, then he doesn’t deserve you in his life.”

  Tears escape my eyes, no matter how hard I try to push them back. I guess I didn’t realize how much I liked Davis until finding out that, once again, I’m the second choice. This time, to another woman.

  Todd swipes my keys from the floor and puts them on the table. He secures me in his arm and guides me over to the couch.

  “Did you eat? I’m going to make you something.” He places me on the couch and abandons me for the kitchen.

  He’s like my mother. Food fixes everything.

  “I’m not hungry,” I tell him, even though I’ll probably eat a gallon of ice cream once the shock is over and the depression hits.

  “A drink? I’ll make you a drink.”

  Cabinet doors rattle open and shut behind me.

  “No.” I sit there and stare at the wooden panels on the floor.

  “What do you want me to do?” he asks, pacing back and forth, in limbo about where to go.

  “Nothing.” I fight the tears that want to uncontrollably spill out.

  The couch dips next to me, and Todd wraps his arm around my shoulders. I snuggle close and curl my feet up and under me. His hand glides down and up my shoulder, back and forth, in a soothing nature, as his lips periodically kiss the top of my head.

  I’m giving him the shitty part of me, the one I hide from others, except for Tatiana. I lean up and see Todd pressing on his phone with his other hand.

  “Oh, I’m sorry.” I sit up and wipe my tears.

  “For what?” He places his phone on the coffee table.

  “You probably have a date, and instead, you’re here, helping me pick up the pieces.”

  “Hey.” His finger pushes my chin up. “I have nowhere to be but here.”

  A gorgeous blue eye winks, and my shoulders slump.

  “Okay?” He dips his head to find my eyes.

  “Okay.” My voice is shallow and insecure.

  “If you must know, I was messaging Tatiana.” He picks up his phone and shows me. “She’s almost home.”

  He smiles, and I smile back because she’ll make it all better.

  “Thank you, Todd.”

  “You never have to thank me.” He retreats into the kitchen.

  “What are you doing?” I rise to my feet and slide onto a barstool.

  “Getting prepared for when Tatiana returns.” He reaches into my cabinet and grabs a few martini glasses.

  “Oh, I really think this is an ice-cream run, not a drink-until-I’m-stupid one.”

  “Then, it’s perfect.”

  Tatiana busts through the door and holds up a brown paper bag. “I’ve got ice cream.”

  “And I have the alcohol.”

  My head pings back to Todd. He’s smiling and holding up a bottle of vodka.

  “Together, that makes ice-cream martinis,” they say in unison.

  If I didn’t know better, I’d think they’d rehearsed this spiel.

  Tatiana walks steadily to me and places the bag on the table before she swings her arms around me. “I’m sorry Mr. Hot Pads ended up being a burned dish.”

  I laugh, and she tightens her grip.

  “That’s what I want to hear.” She pulls back from me. “You’re too good for him.”

  “Isn’t that what you always have to say?”

  She shakes my shoulders until she makes sure she has my undivided attention. “No. Lia, you might be a dud magnet lately—”

  “Hey, now,” Todd says, dishing the ice cream into the martini glasses.

  “You don’t count. You’re friend-zoned.” She cocks her eyebrow.

  Todd spins around and buries his head in the fridge.

  “Unless I’m wrong,” she adds.

  Leave it to Tatiana to make tonight worse.

  “Tati!” I scream to focus her attention back to me.

  Her head comes back my way. “Duds. Yes. But there is a prince out there for you, Lia. We just haven’t found him yet.” She glances to Todd’s back.

  Whose head is now buried in the freezer.

  She lowers her voice. “Or he hasn’t stepped forward yet.”

  I swat her arm and she backs up, laughing and holding her arm like I hurt her. She raises her eyebrows at me and shrugs.

  Tatiana is constantly insinuating that Todd wants more than a friendship with me. She’s crazy. If he did, I’m sure he would have made a move by now.

  “Finally!” Todd pulls out a tub of orange sherbet. “I knew I brought this over. I’m surprised you girls haven’t finished it off.” He’s completely ignorant to our conversation.

  We look at him with blank stares, and a wide brimming his lips.

  “You’ll be impressed in a minute,” he
says.

  A few minutes later, Todd places two martini glasses in front of Tatiana and me. We dig in with our spoons and both moan as soon as the coldness hits our taste buds.

  Todd exaggerates a bow. “Thank you. Thank you very much.”

  Tatiana’s phone breaks up our laughter, and it’s my turn to cock my eyebrows at her. She digs it out of her purse then glances our way.

  “Go.” I shoo her with my hand.

  She hugs me tight. “I trust you’re in good hands?” She lightly kicks me with her foot.

  “I’ll take care of our girl,” Todd tells her.

  She scurries down the hall.

  “Who’s the guy?” Todd asks after we hear her door click shut.

  “I don’t know, but she’s always on her phone or computer with a big ole smile on her face.”

  I shrug, and he digs in to his ice cream.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  Amelia

  I arrive at CHOPs early with the hope that I’ll sneak behind the bar before Davis knows I’m here. Crossing my fingers, I pray he continues with his usual MO and keeps our relationship private, never wavering across the line between business and pleasure.

  Quickly, I rush in and out of the employee break room before Lucy can ask me how I’m doing. I glance into Davis’s office, finding the lights off, and release the breath I was holding. Davis tried to call me two more times last night, and he texted me last night and this morning. I’m guessing he’s seen that his little secret of playing two women is out, and he wants to feed me some bullshit line.

  Midway through my shift, the bar is busy with the happy-hour working patrons unwinding after their long days. Davis hasn’t shown his face, and I’m keeping up pretty well with little wait times. I think the best thing about being a bartender isn’t hearing the stories the customers tell me. It’s overhearing or eavesdropping on conversations, especially the let’s-meet-for-drinks blind dates. They keep lingering thoughts of Davis at bay.

  I escape into the kitchen to grab a scallops appetizer and stop on my heels at the sight of Davis. He’s all decked out in his chef jacket and hat, scurrying around the kitchen.

  “What are you doing here?” I snidely ask.