by Jahquel J
“You should definitely go and check on your baby. How’s you and Denim, did you speak to him yet?”
“Um, well we did more than talking.” She grew quiet on the phone. “We flew to Vegas and got married,” she announced while laughing. As I listened to her tone, she was happy, and I could hear it in her tone.
“Married? Girl, you should have told somebody. What did auntie say?”
“She wasn’t there.”
“Your parents are going to flip. When are you going tell them?”
“I don’t know yet, but I’ll tell them soon as I get back home from Vegas. Alicia, please keep it to yourself,” she begged me.
“You know I got you. Well, congratulations and we need to get together, so we can have a little wine celebration. You know you can have some while pregnant, right?”
“Of course, you would know about that,” she giggled. “Hope you fix everything with Grand and stop being a brat. I’m about to head to dinner with Denim and his brothers,” she told me.
“Denim and his brothers been fine all they life. Remember Jean? That man can take my virginity over and over again,” I reminisced about Denim’s older brother. That man was fine as hell and could get it anytime he wanted it.
“Um, Denim’s my husband now, and I’ll fight you,” she giggled. “Let me go get ready because my husband is side eyeing me hard,” she laughed.
“Enjoy y’all. See you when you get back, cousin.”
“For sure.” She confirmed and ended the call.
Sitting my phone down on the table next to the patio set, I sighed in frustration because my kitty was wet thinking about Jean’s fine ass. He was fine as hell with dark skin that glistened as if he showered with coconut oil. His strong chin was covered with a thick ass beard, and he stood around 6’7 and weighed a good two-hundred and fifty pounds. It had been a while since I saw him, so he probably put on more muscle. He owned a gym in the city that was always filled with celebrities. I called myself trying to join when I was single to get close to him and canceled before they could charge my card. One month was equivalent to a month’s rent. Yeah, it was nice, and all, but a bitch wasn’t about to pay that.
“My homie just hit me, and I been waiting for her ass to hit me up to speak business, so I’ll be in later,” Grand opened the sliding door and peeked his head out. “Stop starting shit over nothing. If that’s how it’s going to be, I’ll leave and head back home.”
“Do what you gotta do.” Part of me wanted to apologize and tell him I was sorry. The other part of me was like fuck it. I already had the meal ticket in my stomach, the fuck I needed him for? On the other hand, I wanted us, and I wanted us to work and prove everyone wrong. Hazel was being supportive about my relationship. Still, I knew she was waiting for it to fail like all the others. I wanted– no, I needed this to work between us.
“I’m not even stressing you. Give me a kiss so I can get gone.” Standing up, I stood on my toes and kissed him on the lips. He bit my bottom lip and held it his grip on it while I pulled back and tried to push him away. He finally let it go and I stared at him like he had lost his mind. “Stop playing these little girl games with me. You gonna learn I’m not the one.” He pointed his finger at me and left out the door.
I could taste the blood on the inside of my mouth as I questioned myself what the hell had just happened.
13
Yoshon
“Who is calling you in the middle of the night?” Golden stirred from her sleep and passed me my phone. We had just finished fucking hours before and were on opposite sides of the bed. Wiping my eyes, I slid my finger across the screen and put the phone on speakerphone. I was tired as fuck and didn’t know what the fuck I was doing. All I wanted was for this phone to stop ringing.
“Yo.”
“Yoshon, I’m in labor and about to head to the hospital with my boyfriend,” I heard a voice come through my phone.
“Ight, let me know how much they gonna charge for the wheel,” I responded and placed the phone back down on the nightstand.
“Huh?”
Golden shot up and shook me violently. “She’s in labor, babe. Yashleigh is about to be born!” Golden screamed and climbed over to me to grab the phone. “Em, he’s sleep talking. Text me the hospital and I’ll make sure I get him there.” She took charge as I was trying to grasp what the fuck was happening. The way Golden put the pussy on me, a nigga was fucking dead to the world. Right about now, I didn’t know what the fuck my long ass name was.
“Wait, give me a minute,” I responded. Don’t ask me why I needed a minute because a nigga was stuck on stupid.
“Yoshon! You’re about to become a father,” she shook and slapped the shit out of me. “Wake the hell up!” she screamed in my ear.
“Golden, if I hit women, I would have knocked your ass out for screaming like that in my fucking face. What the fuck happened?”
“You serious? You don’t know what happened?”
“Nah.”
“Em is in labor and heading to the hospital. Your baby girl is on her way,” she announced and my stomach dropped.
All these months and I was about to become a father in a few hours. My baby girl was about to breathe her first whiff of air. This shit had a nigga’s stomach in knots as I ripped the blanket off my body and got up to grab some clothes. At this point, it didn’t matter what the fuck I threw on because I was going to be a father. Yashleigh wasn’t going to remember what the fuck I wore when she came into this world. All that matter was that I was there when she entered it.
“I got the keys, come on,” Golden was already dressed. She had on pajama pants, a nightgown and a pair of flip-flops. I couldn’t talk about her because I had on basketball shorts, a pajama shirt and some sneakers on.
“Yo, my heart feels like it’s about to come out my chest,” I admitted as I held the bedroom door open for her.
“Yep, that’s the fresh feeling of parenthood,” she giggled. “You got this, don’t be worried.” She smiled and assured me.
Pit Pat was waiting in the kitchen for us when went to pass the kitchen. “I heard everything. I’ve said my prayer for the baby and your surrogate. Call me soon as she sticks her head out that woman’s hooha!” she demanded and reached up and kissed me on the cheek. “You’re about to become a daddy, baby.” She smiled and kissed me once more.
Golden broke all types of laws driving to the damn hospital. She was on her phone texting with Em as I was sitting still in this front seat. It was like I was staring at myself out of my body. Maybe I was in shock. For the life of me, I didn’t know what I expected. I knew this is what I wanted and was happy when Em got pregnant. So why the fuck was I sitting here like I was stuck on stupid or something?
“Thank you, sir.” Golden rolled the window on my side up. We were at the hospital and pulled up to the valet service. Before she got out, she grabbed my face.
“Yoshon, I know you probably feel like you have to shit, and you can’t breathe. We gotta face the fact; your baby girl is coming into this world today. I need you to snap out of this and handle this like you would anything else.”
“Ight, ight, ight,” was all I repeated and got out the car.
We rushed into labor and delivery, and they brought us to Em’s room. She was hooked up to machines and was looking like she was ready to go. “I didn’t want to worry you, but I’ve been in labor all day. I wanted to do labor at home around my family and friends until it was time to check into the hospital,” she explained and then gripped the side rail of the bed.
“The doctors say she’s ready to push. They’re getting everything ready and she’s going to be ready. When she went to bed, she was around 4 centimeters and woke up in a lot of pain,” her boyfriend explained to me.
Emily had told me that she wanted to labor as much as she could at home. She tried to convince me to allow her to have it at home and I refused. I wanted this birth to be done in a hospital. Just because she was all into this holistic and natural shit d
idn’t mean I had to be. The one thing she did ask was to labor at home surrounded by her friends and family until it was time to check into the hospital, so I allowed her to do that.
“T…thank you, man.” I touched his shoulder. The grip I had on his shoulder was to make sure my ass didn’t fall the fuck out.
“Daddy finally arrived. Well, Dad, we need to go and get this baby out. She’s ready to greet the world,” the doctor came in with a team of nurses. The little crib shit was waiting with all the blankets and ink shit for the baby’s footprint was all laid out. Her little hat was sitting right there and waiting for her to come out so she could place it on her head.
“Okay, we need to clear this room out. Two people are allowed to be in here,” the nurse said as she placed some more blankets down.
“Babe, you got this.” Golden hugged and kissed me on the lips. She turned and started out the room.
“Nah. Pete, you been there and shit, but I need her in here with me.”
“Dude, you got it. We’ve been through this plenty of times, so you know I got you, man.” He hugged me and left the room.
Tears clouded Golden’s eyes as she stood at the door. “Baby, I can’t do this shit without you. You with me?”
With tears streaming down her eyes, she walked over and hugged me tightly. “More than you’ll ever know,” she whispered.
“Alright, let’s have this baby. My ribs are killing me!” Emily screamed out and held onto the bed.
Golden rushed to her side and held her back up and her hand. “I’m here,” she told her and smiled at her.
“I really could have used you for my other births,” she joked and then her face turned sour from a contraction.
“Alright, with your next contraction, I want you to give me your all,” the doctor instructed her and she did as she was told.
This was my first time witnessing a birth and my dumb ass chose to stand in front of it all. I wanted to see my baby girl come into the world. My stomach was fucked up watching it, but when I saw the hair that wasn’t Emily’s pussy, I got excited.
“Babe, it’s hair! She got a head full of that shit!” I shrieked in excitement.
“Oh man, you gonna be putting little ballies into her hair,” she joked and continued to coach Emily from above.
“Emily, she’s right here. Give me three me big pushes and she’ll be out,” the doctor told her and Emily pushed.
“Ah shit, her head is out!” I screamed. As Emily pushed, more of her body came out and half of her body was out of Emily’s pale ass pussy.
“One more huge push and she’s out.”
“I’m fucking trying!” Emily cried out as she pushed so hard that her face was beet red. She took a quick breath and then did it again. A bunch of fluids and Yashleigh came out of her. They placed her on Emily’s chest and cleaned her off. I was amazed seeing someone give life. The shit was nasty, yet it was amazing too. Women were fucking amazing, and if I ever doubted them, I would never do it again after witnessing what I did tonight.
“Time to cut the ambilocal cord, Mr. Santana.” The doctor handed me the scissors and I cut the thick ass rope that connected Emily and my daughter. The shit almost felt final, like I was cutting her out of my life. As if she did her job and I didn’t need her for anything else.
“Let me clean her up for you, one sec,” the nurse said and rushed over to the crib shit. She cleaned her up, placed Vaseline on her eyes, took her measurements and then came back with her wrapped like a baby burrito. “Nine pounds, six ounces… Here’s your daughter,” she smiled.
Accepting the baby, I was scared as shit. I was trying to hold her correctly. She was a fat ass burrito. Who would of thought Emily’s grass eating ass would have an almost ten pound baby. I sat down and held her in my arms and stared down at her. Water fell right onto her eyes and I looked up at the ceiling.
“The ceiling isn’t leaking, you’re crying,” Golden softly spoke in my ear as she sat on the arm of the chair. “She’s beautiful, Yoshon,” she rubbed my back.
Yashleigh looked exactly like her mother, Ashleigh. Yeah, I saw a little bit of myself in her, but I saw the majority of her mother. She had her mother’s curly brown hair, the dimple in her cheek and a widow’s peak. All of her mother’s unique facial features she had inherited. The shit made the tears fall faster and faster down my cheek.
“Yo, she look just like Ashleigh,” I said as I held my daughter with one hand and fished in my pocket without the other one. Pulling up a picture on my phone, I handed it to Golden.
“Omg. She looks exactly like her mother. Man, her mother’s genes are strong,” Golden held the phone next to Yashleigh and snapped a picture with her phone. “I’m sending this to Pit Pat,” she told me.
“Let me see,” Emily asked as she was getting stitched up. Apparently, Yashleigh had ripped her some. “Oh wow. Science is so beautiful, isn’t it? I believe she was in this room with us.”
“I do too,” Golden added.
“Yashleigh Golden Santana,” was all I said and both Emily and Golden stared at me confused.
“Are you serious?” Golden questioned as she stood frozen in place. “Babe, you don’t need to do that.”
“Nah, I have to. I wouldn’t have been here if it wasn’t for you. If my daughter has half the strength you possess, I’m good with that. Even if we don’t work out in the end, I can never think about my daughter and not you.”
“You make me sick. Got me in here crying and shit,” she sobbed.
“Want to hold her?”
She nodded her head and accepted the baby from me. “Hey pretty mamas,” she cooed to her. “You’re so lucky to be blessed with the daddy you have. He’s going to spoil you so much and tell you no a bunch of times, but he’ll eventually tell you yes. Plus, you look like your mommy, so how could he tell you no in the first place?” she walked over to the windows in the room. “He’ll tell you all about your mommy and I’ll even ask him to tell me about her, so I can tell you stories too. Your mommy loves you so much, notice I don’t say loved. She loves you and I know as you get older, you’ll be confused because she isn’t here, but she loves you so much. If she could be here, she would have kissed you a million times.” Yashleigh smirked in her sleep. “It looks like you’re already playing with your mommy. Tell her we send our love and promise that you’ll never know what it feels like to be sad, alone or hurt. Long as you have Yoshon as your daddy, you will never know what those things are.” She held her up and kissed her on the forehead.
Sniffling came behind from me and one of the damn nurses was crying her eyes out. “I’m so sorry. I’ve delivered three babies today and this by far was the most emotional one for me.” She sniffled and wiped her eyes.
Golden handed Yashleigh to me and I kissed her on the lips. My daughter was finally here. Long as I had air in my body, she would never want for anything. I officially lived my life for her and for her alone. Never would anybody lay a hand on her curly brown head. One day, she would sit as the queen of the Santana cartel. Yashleigh Golden Santana was destined for greatness.
“We did it, Ash,” I smiled and kissed my daughter for the second time. “We did it.”
14
Golden
It had been a month since Yashleigh was born. We were back in New York, and everything was moving like before, except we had a newborn baby that kept both me and Yoshon up in the middle of the night. The doctor said he recommended two months before Yashleigh was able to fly because of the germs. Yoshon chartered a plane and had them clean it twice before we entered it. Once we landed, we headed straight to the emergency room to see if she was fine. I told him it wasn’t necessary, but he was a new father, so I understood. The doctors told us she’s fine, as long as she didn’t come from out the country, we shouldn’t have any worries. Any little cry and Yoshon was running across his bedroom to the bassinet to make sure she was fine. It was so sexy that he was so worried about his baby.
“I got it,” he groaned as he t
ried to get out the bed. I was sitting beside him on my laptop writing a book. I was so into reading different authors that I decided to give it a try myself. At night seemed the best time to tune into my thoughts.
“Lay down, I got her,” I told him.
“Nah, I g—”
“You’re grabbing a empty bottle,” I called him out and went to grab Yaya up. I gave her that nickname. “Look at you, wide awake. You like to vamp with me, huh?” I kissed her cheek and headed downstairs to make her a new bottle. This was her third bottle tonight and Yoshon tried to do feedings himself. I guess he felt like she was his reasonability and didn’t want to ask me. I’ve already grown attached to Yaya, so I fought him on it. Just because she was his daughter didn’t mean I couldn’t help him out.
“Mom, is Yaya up again?” Gyan wiped the sleep out of his eyes.
“Yes, did she wake you?”
“A little. Is she okay?”
“Yes, she just wants to be held and eat. Come on, let’s get some warm milk.” I took him by the hand and went down the stairs. Yaya’s bouncer was on the counter from early, so I slipped her right inside of it.
I made her a bottle and heated Gyan some warm milk. “Thank you, mom.”
“You’re welcome, baby,” I said as I cradled the baby and fed her the bottle. She was sucking it down like she hadn’t ate at all today.
“Mom, I always wanted to have a little sister, now I have one.” Gyan smiled. He loved helping with the baby. Soon as he came through the door from school, he was excited to hold her and love on her. Yaya was truly the apple of all of our eyes. Pit Pat would sing and cook with her on the counter while I wrote and Yoshon couldn’t start his day until she smiled and exposed her chin dimple. The way this man baby talked with his daughter was cute and hilarious at the same time.
“Baby, you know that Yash—”
“And Yaya always wanted a big brother, and now she has one,” Yoshon’s deep voice cut me off.
