Circle in the Sand (Oceanic Dreams #3)

by Tracy Krimmer

  Asher’s thin lips shaped into a wide grin. He tried to hold in a laugh but didn’t succeed.

  “What the hell is so funny?”

  “I’m sorry, Isla. Stealing your thunder? Are we on an episode of Friends? Next you’ll be telling me we’re on some sort of a break!”

  I took a deep breath and pressed my lips together. No. I wasn’t going to laugh. He didn’t get off the hook this easily. I couldn’t help it, though, and joined him. “Next you’ll be saying I made a moo point!”

  When we regained our composure over small Friends one-liners, Asher reached over and put his hand on my arm. “Look, for what it’s worth, I’m sorry. It was nice to see Helena, but I never meant to ignore you. You have to believe me.”

  “I do believe you.” Maybe I held a bit of jealousy in my heart but not for the reasons he thought. I valued our friendship, and I hated that the presence of Helena threatened it. But while they knew each other years ago, Helena didn’t know Asher like I did. I overreacted. That I now knew.

  “I’m sorry for being so stupid. Tim always said I didn’t think clearly before I made a decision or even spoke sometimes.” Think before you speak. Don’t be so emotional. Throw your passion into something that matters. Oh, the things he said to me. I never realized how his words imprisoned me.

  “No. You stop that right now. Tim is a class A jerk. We’ve already determined that. You’re intelligent, funny, and beautiful.”

  My ears perked up at the last word. Beautiful? Asher had never said that to me before. And I never really thought of myself that way either.

  “You have every right to be upset with me. I behaved selfishly. How can I make it up to you?”

  I made the right choice by talking it out with him. It was wrong to ask him not to hang out with Helena. That wasn’t fair. And even more so, I wanted him to stop thinking I was jealous.

  “Tell you what.” Asher swung his arm around me and pulled me into his chest. I breathed him in again as his heart beat against me, my own skipping a few beats. “Let’s take a cab, just the two of us, up to this vineyard I read about. There’s a tour we can take and drink lots of wine together.”

  “I am a fan of wine.”

  “I’m well aware of that. Let’s hang out the rest of the day together, just us. Sound good?”

  “It sounds amazing.”

  He squeezed me tight, and I closed my eyes as I let out a breath. Why did he make my heart race like he did? Never before had he invoked such feelings inside me. I had to bottle up these emotions and send them off in the sea. Far, far away. When Asher pulled me close to him and I breathed him in, a comfort I hadn’t felt since well before Tim came over me. It wrapped me in its embrace and held me tight, making me feel safe.

  A safeness I’d never known.

  Chapter Nine

  Day Four: Grand Cayman

  We arrived in Grand Cayman the next morning. The boat docked about a mile offshore, and we took a tender boat to the shoreline. The sky was gloomy but that didn’t matter. The warm air still felt great against my skin, and I was somewhere I never expected to be my entire life.

  “Did you book anything for this port?” Asher asked.

  As we stepped off the boat and onto the dock, I took in the area surrounding us. This had to be heaven on Earth. The sand was as white as I’d seen in pictures, and I’d never seen water so clear. This was beauty at its finest.

  “Nope. I didn’t plan a thing.”

  “You didn’t? You’re little Miss Planner.”

  That nickname suited me well. I liked sticking to a schedule, but for this cruise I didn’t set a strict itinerary. When Charlotte and I started planning it, we wanted to play it day by day. Who knew what we’d feel like doing? And Asher let us take the reins and handle everything, so he hadn’t a clue what was going on.

  “True. Not this time, though. See, I do have a few surprises up my sleeve.” I curled my lip and winked.

  “I’m one hundred percent on board with that.”

  I wanted to immerse myself in the culture and experience life like a local. I mostly wanted to relax. One day I vowed to take a trip to Italy or Greece. Then I’d make some plans. Today I only wanted to bask in the sun and have a drink. Or two or three.

  Before we left for the cruise, I watched some YouTube videos outlining the best places to go, and there was a specific beach considered a must stop. “There’s a beach not far from here. It’s a public one the locals go to. Why don’t we take a cab there and sit on the sand and drink?”

  “Are you sure you don’t want to swim with dolphins or visit with stingray?”

  I shrugged. “Do you?”

  Asher smiled. “Lead the way to the beach.”

  We took the ten-minute taxi ride, just me and Asher, to the beach. While busy, it didn't seem overcrowded. We each went into a changing area and changed into our bathing suits. We met back outside and searched for a good spot to sit. The beach had predestined areas labeled for beachgoers, with lounge chairs and umbrellas to protect from the sun. And the sun shone bright and hot. The beach reminded me of all the commercials I’d seen. This was paradise, and I was deep in it.

  “Isn’t this just so beautiful?” I asked Asher. I posed it as a question even though it was more of a statement. I laid back on the chair and closed my eyes.

  “Yeah. This is pretty close to perfect. I’ve seen a lot of places but never something like this.”

  Asher’s job took him all over the United States. He’d never traveled internationally before—neither had I—but he’d had more chances to experience beauty than I had.

  “To think all these years we’ve been blinded by Lake Michigan’s beauty when entire oceans were out there.”

  “I hardly think we’ve been blinded by anything from Lake Michigan other than the occasional smell coming off the beach.”

  “I’m not sure how smell can blind you, but I understand what you’re saying and respectfully disagree.” Sure, Lake Michigan wasn’t the Caribbean, but it still held beauty. The waves crashing into the rocks, the sailboats drifting offshore, the sun setting in the distance. Even still, this was incredible. I took a mental picture so I could revisit it whenever the slightest bit of stress came over me.

  “Let’s build a sandcastle,” Asher said, startling me out of the peaceful dream I found myself in.

  “A sandcastle? Am I eight?”

  “Isla, you don’t need to be a child to have fun building a sandcastle. We can do that or play volleyball. I saw a net over there.”

  “You want me to play sand volleyball? I can’t even play on solid ground. You really expect me to play on sand?”

  “It’s not quicksand. It’ll be fun.”

  I slid my sunglasses down the bridge of my nose. “Hard pass.”

  “Come on. Let’s have some fun. I don’t want to just sit here and stare at the water.”

  “What’s wrong with that?”

  “It’s boring! Let’s have some fun.”

  How could he describe staring into the breathtaking Caribbean as boring? It was relaxing, serene, something I desperately needed. I’d be thirty tomorrow. Thirty. Each year I crept closer to the top of the hill. My prime years were behind me. Soon I’d be eating dinner at five and in bed by eight. My drink of choice would be Ovaltine when I took my myriad of pills.

  Maybe it wouldn’t be that way, but it sure felt like it. I thought by thirty Tim and I would be married and I’d have a either a baby on the way or I’d be chasing around a toddler. I wasn’t anywhere near that.

  “Isla, snap out of it. Come on now. Allow yourself to have some fun.”

  I pulled myself off my lounge chair and sunk my knees into the sand, the grains sifting between my toes. When I picked up a handful, the pieces fell through my fingers. “See? We can’t even make a sandcastle.”

  “Stop it. You’re being a pain in the butt and acting like you’ve never done this before.” He reached out and took my hand, nodding his head to the left. “Come closer to the w
ater where the sand is wet.”

  I reluctantly took his hand, which felt both strange and comfortable, and he led me closer to the water. I kneeled on the ground, the gritty sand coating my knees while the water splashed against my legs. “I may just lie down here and fall asleep.”

  “You will do no such thing. We’re going to build a palace. Your idea of fun may be taking a nap, but it’s a crime to waste this day away.”

  I smiled at Asher, grateful for the friend I had in him. Even if I refused to participate, he’d make fun of me, but he’d understand. As his friend, though, I realized how important this was to him. He wanted me to have fun and knew I’d regret it in the long run if I didn’t.

  “If you’re not going to do something crazy like go scuba diving, let’s at least do something.”

  “Fine. I’ll build your sandcastle, and it will be the most magnificent sandcastle of all sandcastles ever built.”

  “Okay, now you’re just being sarcastic. But I like that.” He kneeled down next to me and started gathering the sand into a pile.

  “Excuse me, can we use one of your buckets?” I asked a young girl a few feet away from us. She shrugged and handed it to me. “Thanks.” The girl didn’t reply.

  “Wow. I guess manners are lost on her.” Asher picked up sand and placed it in the bucket, packing it down with his fist. “So what do you think Charlotte is doing right now?”

  “I bet she took her brother to a Brewers game. He lives for baseball. I can’t believe he’s back from his deployment. I’m glad he’s safe.”

  “Wayne’s an incredible man. Always has been. I’ve only met him a few times, but each time he was a stand-up guy.”

  “Can I tell you a secret?”

  “I love a juicy secret.”

  “It’s not that juicy, but I had a crush on him once.”

  “Stop it.” Asher flipped the bucket over and started the base of our castle. “When was this?”

  I shrugged. “Right before he deployed. Do you remember that time Tim and I broke up for like a week? We had a fight, and I thought it was over. Charlotte kept pushing me to forget about him and start dating again. You know her, never wasting any time. Then Wayne started in on me. He told me that any man would be lucky to have me, and I guess I developed a smidgen of feelings for him. It lasted for like a week. That’s it.” Huh. So maybe Charlotte had tried to tell me at least once that Tim wasn’t right for me. And then I took him back.

  Wayne was so easy to like. He had a large circle of friends, and women hung on him all the time. Between his curly, dirty blond hair and the dimples that formed around his permanent smile, he wasn’t bad to look at either.

  “Well, I think Wayne was right.”

  “About what?” I collected more sand and packed it in the bucket.

  “About any man being lucky to have you. You’re pretty amazing, Isla.”

  “Oh, stop. I am not.”

  “Yes, you are. Don’t sell yourself short. You’re kind and intelligent. I’ve never seen someone love their job as much as you do. You’ve helped start so many new programs at the library. You’re pretty amazing.”

  “Thanks.” I guess. I heard what he said, but he listed qualities like off of a checklist.

  “Thanks, and . . .”

  “What? Am I supposed to say something here?” I lifted my head from focusing on the sandcastle enough to catch the smirk on his face. “Tell me. What do you want me to say?”

  “This is where you’re supposed to tell me how great I am.”

  “But are you really, Asher?”

  His mouth dropped open, and he collected the sand, throwing it at me before I had an opportunity to duck. Sand covered my hair, and I spit some out of my mouth.

  “Not funny.” I smiled, though, because really it was.

  Before we knew it, we completed our castle. People walking by stopped to take it in, the two-story building we managed to create complete with a moat and a bridge.

  “I love it. Thanks for talking me into this.” Sweat dripped down my back from the sun beating directly on it, and I hoped I hadn’t burned.

  “Too bad we can’t live in it.”

  “I’m short enough,” I teased. “I might be able to.”

  Just as we both let out a laugh, a teenaged boy plowed into it as he caught a football. The walls came tumbling down, and all that remained was a big pile of wet sand. The boy made an apologetic face but not in a very apologetic way and raced back toward his friends. “Did you see that?” I heard him call out to his buddies. “I totally took out that castle.”

  “Sorry, Isla,” Asher said. “I should go say something. That was so rude.”

  “No, don’t.” I stared at the pieces of what we’d made.

  “I will. The least he can do is be sincere about his apology.” Asher stood from the ground and wiped the sand off his legs.

  “Asher, it’s fine, really.” I reached up and tried to pull him back down.

  “Nope. I’m going.”

  “Asher, stop! It’s a sandcastle. It would have been destroyed eventually. It’s not like he came over here and smashed it on purpose. It was an accident.”

  “Are you sure? I don’t want you to be upset.”

  “I’m not. Don’t treat me like I’m so fragile I could break at any moment. You’re the one who told me to enjoy my time here, to live in this moment. So I am. Some dude fell right onto our castle. It was funny. Really funny.”

  “You didn’t think it was funny junior year of high school when I accidentally ruined your science project.”

  I’d forgotten about that. Asher and I didn’t talk or see each other much during high school. We ran across each other a few times, one of those times being when I brought my final project to school. I sat it down by my locker, and while he called out to one of his friends and walked backward at the same time, he stepped right on it, ruining it.

  “That project was half my grade!” I didn’t think I’d ever forgive him when he did that. I hated him for it. I needed to start the entire project over and only had two days to do it. He offered to help, but I refused, instead locking myself at home for the entire weekend to finish. I ended up acing the class.

  “If I recall, you got a perfect grade on it. Maybe I had a little to do with that. If I hadn’t ruined it, maybe the one you made wouldn’t have gotten such a great grade.”

  “Maybe. But you personally didn’t help. I thought you took science twice?”

  “Hey!” He poked his finger in my side and tickled me. I let out a burst of laughter and threw my head back. “I did not fail anything.”

  I regained my composure and caught him looking at me. “What?” I asked.

  “Nothing.”

  “You’re staring.”

  “Am I?”

  Why hadn’t I ever noticed how vibrant his eyes were before? The black of his pupils brightened the color around it. And his lips . . . so full and begging for me to kiss them. Oh, how I wanted to kiss them. I thought about my dream, how he took me in his arms and we shared the most amazing kiss I’d ever had in my life. Was my dream about to become a reality? Neither of us spoke, our eyes connecting and sharing this intimate moment. As he leaned in toward me, I took a deep breath, ready for my life to be changed forever.

  “Look out!”

  The two words that forced us apart in my dream did so in real life. The same teenaged boy from before raced toward us at a fast pace and practically hopped over me to catch the ball.

  This time? Not so funny. I couldn’t think of anything worse than a moment like this being interrupted—twice—even if one wasn’t for real. This time the kid at least said sorry as he walked away. I didn’t want to laugh, but I had to. Because that’s what my luck was. Funny.

  Chapter Ten

  Day Five: Cozumel

  My phone hadn’t rung the entire trip, but the next morning the chimes woke me from a deep sleep. Who called at—what time was it?—seven in the morning! I covered my face with my pillow before reachin
g for the phone.

  “Whoever this is better have a damn good reason to be waking me,” I squeaked into the phone, my eyes barely open.

  “Happy birthday!” a voice from the other end of the line screeched at me in the most annoying voice possible this early in the morning. But I loved that voice, no matter how annoying.

  “Charlotte, hey.” I slowly pitched myself up in bed. If I remained horizontal, I’d have fallen right back asleep, no doubt. “It is my birthday, isn’t it?” I didn’t feel any different.

  “Yes, it is. The big three-zero! I can’t believe it’s finally here. Are you still all in one piece? Has your back started to hurt? Do your knees creak? Do you feel a need to only discuss the squirrels that run across your lawn?”

  “Stop it. I’m not that old.” Yet. Although at times my back did hurt, and I swore my shoulder tore the other day but it could have also been my imagination. I hoped so because even though thirty felt old to me, I still was too young to be going through things like that.

  “The next big one is forty. Are you excited?”

  “Can I just get through the first year of being thirty before we even start to think about that? I have ten years before I’m over the hill. Please let me process this one first.” I scooted my body back down so I was lying down. It was too early for this, but I appreciated the call.

  “How has the trip been? Have you swum with dolphins or gone zip-lining?”

  “I am not going zip-lining. Do you know anything about me?”

  “I know you said you were going to try and stay young and put yourself out there.”

  “Well, I have to be alive to do that. You go zip-lining and tell me how it is. I’ll live vicariously through you. It’s easier.”