Dark Weaver (Weaver Series)

by Dena Nicotra

  “I’m fine. I think that I just have so much to get over, what with all that happened you know?”

  “Yeah, I understand. I still wake up in the middle of the night every now and again. I have these terrible dreams about Railey and Lela. It’s so weird how Kiss-Kiss just disappeared like it never even existed after you reversed Railey’s weaves. Do you ever think about what happens when you reverse something Jo? I mean…do you and Kalan ever talk about any of that?”

  “No Pepper, we just try to focus on us you know? Kalan is always trying to help me expand on my abilities.” I wasn’t being completely honest with her because I did think about it. I thought about it a lot actually. Kalan and I really didn’t talk much about everything that happened because it seemed to upset him even more than it did me. Considering he was hanging over his own grave, I can’t say that I didn’t understand, although he did enjoy discussing the part where I brought him back from the grave.

  The nightclub that Railey and Kessler owned was now a dry cleaning business, which is owned and operated by an elderly Chinese couple. They think that they’ve owned it for the last eighteen years. I know because I made it a point to visit the establishment as soon as we realized that the nightclub was erased off the map. I don’t know what I expected when I’d walked in. Perhaps I believed that there would be some small trace of them — that there would be some snippet of a clue to their whereabouts. To my dismay, the only familiar elements were the black and white tiles on the floor, and a small clock that used to sit on Kessler’s desk now rested on the chipped laminate counter. The tiles on the floor were much smaller, and the couple looked nothing at all like Railey and Kess.

  “I wonder where they are too,” I admitted solemnly. The truth was, it scared me to death that Railey and Lela’s whereabouts were a mystery. Who knew when or if they would pop up again? I mean, I know that I’m a master weaver but Lela is some sort of ancient, dark overlord or something. I’d be a fool not to be afraid of that bird-woman and her horrid little protégé. Her creepy mannerisms reminded me so much of a buzzard! I shuddered just thinking about her. I knew Pepper felt the same. I kept my thoughts about Kessler to myself.

  “We’re just going to have to accept that they are gone, and trust that they are not coming back,” I mumbled, less convincingly than I’d intended.

  “Yeah, well you never know,” Pepper said distantly.

  “They’re not coming back Pep. Railey couldn’t get what she wanted from me, and she never will.” I meant that. As frightening as Railey and Lela had been, I was in command of my power now, and it was stronger than ever. I just needed to trust that and continue to do what I’d been doing. I needed to move on with my life and leave those events in the past. If only that nagging feeling would go away.

  “Joey?” I hadn’t realized how much silence had fallen between us since my last comment.

  “Sorry Pep, I’m here.” The sliding glass door opened and I looked up to see Kalan standing there, motioning to his mouth and then his stomach. Dinner was ready.

  “Things are not always what they seem, okay?”

  That was a strange comment, but I chalked it up to twitchy nerves.

  “Okay Pep. Listen, I gotta run. Kalan says he sends his love, but he’s just fixed dinner for us and…”

  “Okay, say no more, go and eat!”

  I told her to give Marty our best and we agreed to talk again later in the week. When I came back in, Kalan had two plates on the table, a candle lit, and jazz music playing softly in the background.

  “Ooh, look at all of this ambiance you have going on in here!”

  “I know, aren’t I romantic?”

  “You’re so romantic Kalan, and I am such a lucky girl.”

  “Well, eat up before it gets cold,” he said, a slight edge in his tone. I sensed that he was a little tense and a smidge annoyed and I felt bad, but I hadn’t talked with Pepper in so long. As it was I’d cut my conversation short to get back inside.

  “So what did Pepper want?” he asked, swirling his pasta.

  “Nothing really — just calling to say hi and catch up,” I said.

  Dinner was delicious and despite my apprehensiveness, I felt ten times better with a full stomach. We weaved the kitchen clean (my favorite way to do housework) and curled up on the couch together to watch a movie, which I found predictable and could have sworn I’d seen before. I didn’t need to make any excuses for my silent behavior throughout the evening. Kalan seemed distant too. I couldn’t blame him with the way that I’d been behaving though.

  I sat up straighter, exhaled a restless mouthful of air, and tried to concentrate on the movie.

  “You’re not in to this movie at all are you?”

  “Sorry babe, not really,” I admitted.

  “Do you want to watch something else?”

  “You know what, I think I just need some alone time. I’m really tired,” I said with a yawn. “I think I just want to go to bed.” For the first time in months, the door between our units closed behind him when he left. I wasn’t bothered by that, in fact it came as somewhat of a relief to be alone with my thoughts.

  I drank a tall glass of cold milk, shut the lights out, and crawled into my bed. Alone in the dark I focused on stuffing down my sense of dread and comforted myself with the fact that tomorrow I would speak with Professor Olrick. I’d put some logical, if not scientific theory around my fragile thoughts and get my perspective in order. “Just dreams,” I whispered to the darkness. As I drifted off, my mind replayed a vivid sequence of Kess as he mouthed that word…presque vu. From there I was falling and when that sensation stopped, I was face to face with Kessler. His lips curving sensually into a smile before he buried his head in my hair and told me how good I smelled, and how much he’d missed me.

  We can be bolder in dreams than we are in reality and I didn’t hesitate as I jumped into his arms. He caught me mid-stride and I wrapped my legs around his waist, meeting his lips with a fevered passion. It was as if we hadn’t seen each other in years and his lips were my source of oxygen. His kisses tasted like sweet summer nights, and I could not get enough. The shyness in me evaporated as I hungrily explored his mouth. His dark hair hung over my face like a safe hiding place as he pulled me to lay down with him. The room we were in was dim, and I was grateful for the lack of light. If this was his darkness, let it consume me. Let it linger and damn the light for trying to find us. Words were so unnecessary. In my dreams, he was everything. He understood me without words, without logic. Time was infinite and I required nothing more. Soft music played in the background and the sparkle in his dark eyes fulfilled my every need.

  “I don’t want to send you back,” he said in a passionate whisper.

  “Keep me forever then,” I said in a sleepy voice.

  “You’re mine Joey. You always have been.”

  “I know, but I can’t control this. You know I can’t.”

  “I know you can’t. None of this is your fault…”

  I raised my hand to his lips to quiet him because I didn’t want to hear this. I didn’t want him to focus on the sadness of uncontrollable things. I knew somehow that our time was limited and I just needed to kiss him again. I needed to feel his arms around me, and hide in the darkness that was his. He seemed to understand my request because he stopped speaking and tenderly met my lips. I felt liberated with indulgence and the deeper he kissed me, the more I felt the heat stir in my body. Let the rest of the world be damned. Hell, let me be damned, I required nothing more than the sound of his breathing and the warmth of his embrace.

  I closed my eyes and somewhere in my consciousness, I heard him say, “I promise I’ll protect you. Nothing matters more than keeping you safe.” It was more than enough to ease my tension and I cursed myself for drifting into a deeper sleep and wasting my time to dream.

  Chapter Two

  I woke up groggy and found when I peeked out my bedroom window that the day matched my mood. Flicking on the television, I sighed as the
weather anchor announced that the remainder of the week would be overcast and cold. I could have sworn that I’d heard differently just last night on another channel. Obviously that station’s weather person had gotten it completely wrong. After eating a bowl of instant oatmeal, I reached out mentally to Kalan. He had an early class on Wednesdays, and I knew he was already on campus. “Have a good day baby. See you at lunch?” Before I’d finished cleaning up, he responded with a terse, “I can’t meet for lunch. I’ll see you tonight – have some things to do.” It wasn’t hard to read the distant emotion in his tone, and a twinge of guilt coursed through me.

  Why wouldn’t he be hurt? He knew I’d dreamt about Kess. I’d called out his name in my sleep right in front of him! To make matters worse, I was behaving standoffish. I hadn’t meant to be distant toward him, it was just that I was feeling very confused. I guess I tend to clam up when I’m feeling off kilter. I’ve always been that way. It just seems wrong to bother others with my troubles when most folks have plenty of their own to chatter about if they had a mind to. Besides, I didn’t care for the idea of hurting him more by telling him I felt like something was missing in my life. I made a silent vow to fix things tonight…after I talked with Professor Olrick.

  I took a quick shower and then dressed in a pair of jeans and a black turtleneck. Not bothering with make-up, I finger combed my bangs, threw my hair into a quick side braid, and grabbed a jacket. I was still unaccustomed to the cool temperatures near the beach in the off-season. Even though it was now early April and significantly warmer than it had been in the past months, I longed for the heat of summer. Oh what I wouldn’t give to be sitting on the beach feeling the warm sand beneath my toes! Thinking about that just made me feel even gloomier so I turned my attention back to the present.

  I did a quick check to make sure I’d turned off the lights, snatched my floppy purse from the desk, and then weaved myself to the campus. Professor Olrick was bent over a stack of papers when I entered his classroom. His silvery hair was drawn back into his customary ponytail, and his wire-framed glasses rested mid-way down his narrow nose. I cleared my throat to announce myself.

  “Well good morning Miss Akers, it’s nice of you to stop by. What can I do for you?”

  “Hi,” I said nervously. Now that I was here, I wasn’t sure exactly how to approach this. It seemed far more reasonable in my head to go to him for advice but now I felt like I was intruding. “Uhm, Professor Olrick, I was wondering if I might ask you a question?”

  He waved me to the chair opposite his desk before adding, “If it’s about grades, please don’t. I’m working my way through this stack as fast as I can and you’d be the fifth student in the last two days to ask.” He pushed the stack to the side and mumbled something under his breath about how students would be less concerned with their test scores if they actually came to class regularly.

  “No –I didn’t come for that,” I said. He smiled genuinely.

  “Well good then, what is it?” He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms.

  “I was just wondering, do you suppose there is any connection to reoccurring dreams and Associationism?”

  “Are you experiencing this yourself, or are you asking in general?”

  I hesitated, but figured it couldn’t hurt to share the information. I tried to read his thoughts to see how receptive he was, but I hit a mental brick wall, which I attributed to his education. I’d experienced that more than once since I’d returned to school. Some folks are simply on a higher mental level than others are, and can literally conceal their thoughts from weavers – or at least from me. The complexity of thoughts can be transcendent, but equally baffling. His mind was so complex that I often had to tune him out in class just to concentrate. Today all I picked up from him was that his focus centered on the stack of papers on his desk to be graded.

  “I’ve been having the same dream for a while now. It’s not a nightmare, but it seems that when I wake up I’m just on the verge of remembering something important, or rather, that I dreamed something important and I just can’t quite recall what it was.”

  He scratched his beard thoughtfully, “Ah, presque vu! Certainly there could be something that is prevalent on your mind which is causing you to have a reoccurring dream, but the topic of dreams themselves is a rather elusive subject.” I understood exactly what he meant by elusive, but I needed answers that revealed more than speculation. I tried not to let my facial expression reveal my disappointment as he continued. “If you’re looking for a definitive answer on why you are dreaming the dream, I’d suggest searching your own mind about the topic. What does it mean to you?”

  “I guess I’m not entirely sure,” I said and brushed at a lint ball on my sleeve. So much for getting a perfect answer, I thought to myself. After a few meaningless exchanges, my professor instructed me to concentrate on the meaning of the dream and told me it was something personal to me alone. He then dismissed me with a slip of paper on which he’d scribbled some book titles for me to collect at the campus library. Apparently, Jung and Freud had opinions that I might find enlightening.

  Disheartened, I thanked him for his time and wandered down the hall toward the cafeteria. I wouldn’t waste my time going to the library; I could probably find more helpful information online. If that didn’t work, I would weave the books to myself later and save the time it would take from my schedule to stand in line checking them out.

  As I rounded the corner, I could have sworn I saw Kess standing against an oak tree in the distance. My heart rate went into overdrive and I quickened my pace. I worked my way through and around other students with a series of apologies but when I got near enough to see the guy against the tree I realized it wasn’t him. Just a dark-haired guy in a bowler hat wearing jeans and a white t-shirt. I lowered my head and continued down the hall slowly. These dreams were really starting to take a toll on me. Now I was imagining things…and if I started seeing Railey or Lela I just knew my nerves would splinter.

  I wasn’t really hungry since I’d already had my breakfast, but I didn’t have a class until nine and a cup of coffee sounded like a good way to fend off the chill. As soon as I walked in the door, I was accosted by Jackie, a friend I’d made in my pottery class. I knew she was there before I laid eyes on her by the cloying scent of her flowery body spray.

  “Hey Jo!” she beamed, a bagel in one hand and a coke in the other.”

  “Hi Jackie, what’s up?”

  I didn’t have to ask, Jackie projected like a lighthouse. I knew she was failing her classes, that her rent was past due, and that she was worried because she had no idea how she was going to tell her parents about her predicament.

  “Not much, just the usual. Want to get a table?”

  “Yeah, I’ll find you, let me just grab some coffee.”

  The room was becoming more crowded and I was glad when I spied her waving hand as I scanned the room. We sat at a small table in the back and did our best to have a conversation as the volume of chatter in the room continued to rise. If that wasn’t hard enough, I was finding it difficult to focus on our conversation with all of the sentiment going on around me. I did a quick weave for Barbara, an elderly lady who works behind the counter five days a week. This was something I’d meant to do at least two weeks earlier but I’d forgotten until she mentioned that she would be out for a while as she gave me my change. There was so much need in the room that I went into auto-pilot mode, and as Jackie spoke, I busily adjusted events all around me. A bad decision not to study for a test here, an overlooked power bill over there – nothing too hectic but enough to make it difficult to focus on the conversation I was half-heartedly participating in. Her plump hand waved in front of my face, “Hello, earth to Jo, are you in there?”

  “I’m sorry Jackie, just got a lot on my mind I guess.”

  “Okay, well then I’ll repeat that because you obviously didn’t catch what I asked – do you know of anyone who’s hiring?” she spoke each word with exaggerated
slowness and hand gestures.

  I looked up at her anxious face and realized then that I’d done nothing to help her. I’d known of Jackie’s problems for weeks, and I hadn’t done anything to assist her, which wasn’t like me at all.

  “I don’t, but if I hear anything I’ll let you know.”

  I watched as she nervously ran her index finger in the cream cheese and then licked it off her finger.

  “That’s cool, thanks.”

  “I’m sure you’ll find something Jackie, don’t stress about it.” She rolled her brown eyes and shook her head, making her short brown hair swoosh back and forth. “Right, because everyone wants to hire the full-figured girl.”

  “Stop it,” I said lightly.

  “No really, I have put applications in at every store in the mall, every fast-food place between my apartment and here, and still no luck.”

  I smiled and patted her hand. “I’m sure you’ll find something soon, just hang in there okay?”

  “Yeah, I know.” She wrapped what was left of her bagel in a napkin and picked up her coke. “See you later – I’ve got to run to make it across campus.”

  “See you,” I mumbled, feeling like an absolutely incompetent weaver. As she walked away, I quickly arranged a job for her at a craft store near her place. It wasn’t much but it would help. I just didn’t seem to have the energy to do more for her or anyone else at the moment. I collected my stuff and knocked my coffee off the table in the process. This prompted an embarrassing barrage of jeers from a few guys seated at a nearby table. Normally I would have seen that coming and avoided it, which proved even further how distracted I was.

  The rest of the day seemed to follow in the same crappy pattern that it had started in. A never ending stream of things that I seemed to have forgotten, like my paper for science, my commitment to have my portion of research completed for my health class team project, and my payment for my cell phone bill — a reminder for which came in the form of a text message in the middle of Professor Olrick’s lecture. His scowl was a clear indication that he’d heard my phone and he made a point of asking me to see him about it before I left his class.