BeSwitched

by Molly Snow

  Chapter 14

  After Friday night, Craig and Tiffany demonstrated their exaggerated lust for each other openly, in an attempt to upset Surla. In the hallways, the cafeteria, even outside the library, hands were roving and tangoing tongues taunted her.

  The next day in History class, Tiffany bragged to Surla and whoever else could hear, that she and Craig were going dressed up in matching costumes for Revere Park’s Halloween bash. “It’s going to be perfect.”

  “Are you going?” Surla cleverly changed the topic to Todd.

  “No, I can’t,” he responded. “I have to take my sister out trick-or-treating. It’s her last year of going door to door, so I know she’ll want to stay out until way past her bed time.”

  That information made her feel in a bummer mood, so she tried to focus on the lesson. The teacher was speaking about pirates. It was interesting enough. “These bandits of the sea were ruthless, often taking treasured possessions from other ships by force. They stole anything of value, gold and even food. Ships sunk from firing cannonballs and sword fights ended by death.”

  She imagined for a second, Craig arriving at the Halloween party as a pirate, his black eye hidden with an eye-patch. The rude attitude that goes with the costume wouldn’t have to be an act and Tiffany could be his squawking parrot. Mmmm, a parrot, Surla licked her lips subconsciously.

  For the period of time that Pussface snuck away from Cathy’s, the scrawny cat roamed the dark streets and alleys without any namable reason. Why didn’t he go back to Idis? He wasn’t sure himself. He just knew he felt confusion, and eating scraps from tin garbage cans didn’t help him think clearer.

  A few other hungry and homeless felines crossed paths with him, most of whom were punks fighting over basically anything: rebels without a cause. Pussface imagined what they would look like if they were human. They would have super-spiky Mohawks and fake leather pants. Instead of switchblades, these cats had switch-claws.

  Hoping for a little refuge and romance, Pussface peeked through a typical hole in a backyard fence. “Why am I even doing this?” He watched Diamond prance around flower beds, chasing little flies. One blue moth in particular seemed as if it was playing along and thinking ‘catch me if you can’! It even loopdy-looped and landed on her nose a couple times.

  “Hey, Peeping Tom Cat,” a deep and lazy voice said from behind Pussface.

  He turned to see Lenny, another black cat. (Remember, all black cats can talk, with a witch or without.) Lenny was surrounded by three of his buddies—two were skinny, showing ribs, their eyes big with hunger and the third was an orange and white fat cat.

  “What do ya boys want?” Pussface spoke with a tough accent, which comes out whenever he aims to sound threatening.

  “We was wonderin’ whachoo were doin’ lookin’ at our Cat Woman.” Lenny stepped closer, his posse following closely behind.

  “Your Cat Woman? Who says she’s yours, Batman?” he joked. “And what’s up with Garfield here? Has he been swiping everyone’s portion of fish bones?”

  Like a trigger, Lenny and the posse’s front right claws shot out.

  Pussface flinched, arching his back. “Come on now, why does there have to be this black-cat-on-black-cat crime?” the cornered and now scaredy cat pleaded.

  The orange cat moved forward, like it was a personal invitation to hurt Pussface.

  “This isn’t fair. It’s three against…” He stopped suddenly, hearing someone coming down the sidewalk. It was a midnight jogger. Not wanting the guy to suspect anything weird, Pussface continued to act like a normal cat until he disappeared around the block. “Hiss! Hiss! Meow! Hiss!” was followed by flailing of paws and spitting.

  Lenny and the posse looked at each other with amusement. “That wuz pretty funny, wuzn’t it?”

  Pussface’s snaggletooth poked out in his grin. “Does that mean you’re gonna let me go?”

  “No.” They cornered him, still intimidating him with their razor-sharp switch-claws.

  “Wait, I have an idea.” Pussface thought quickly. “Let’s have a contest.”

  “What kind of contest?” They were skeptical.

  “You know, to see which one of us Diamond would go for.”

  All their claws retracted with thought. “Yeah, what do we gotta do?” Lenny asked.

  “We each have to go hunting for the best present to give her. Whichever gift she enjoys the most, then whoever caught it will win.”

  “So, you mean like catchin’ a mouse for her?” Lenny was warming up for competition.

  “Yeah, you got the idea.” Pussface’s muscles relaxed. “We’ll meet back here in twenty minutes. Sound good, boys?”

  “Okay, but no cheatin’, loser. I better not catch you with her until we’re all here and ready,” Lenny warned, and then took off down a dark road, with his posse following closely behind.

  Pussface once again peeked through the hole in the fence. Diamond was still fervently chasing flies. He almost forgot time was ticking, absorbed in his admiration for her.

  The other cats were seeking rodents in a dirty alley. Many rats were skittering around through garbage.

  “This will be easy.” Lenny crouched down, singling out one that was fat with light brown fur. Its eyes were black and beady; its tail was long and scaly with scabs. Not noticing it was being snuck up on by its worst enemy, his long pointed and twitching nose sniffed at an old jelly donut with hunger. Before it could take a nibble, the black cat had it in its paws.

  “Bring over the tray of goodies!” Lenny meowed to his three obedient alley cats. The lid to a tin garbage can was slid over in a hurry. Already laying lifeless on it were three rodents.

  Right before the twenty minutes were over, Lenny entered Diamond’s backyard with his tin platter.

  “Ha ha! We’re here first. I wonder if the loser gave up.” He strutted toward the white-as-cotton kitty, the food being pushed along by his buddies. Diamond backed herself up into a corner of the wooden fence.

  “Hey, we ain’t here to cause no trouble, miss. I just came to bring you a gift. A very tasty one. See, these four rats were caught in only fifteen minutes. I’m givin’ ’em to you.”

  Lenny leaned to the feast, snagging by the tail a half-hairless rat with his teeth. The carcass wagged to and fro as he stepped closer to Diamond. “Here, take it. It’s for you,” he mumbled through a clenched jaw.

  The rat was held only two or so inches from Diamond’s face. The foul odor, which could almost turn the air green with its stench, seeped up through the kitty’s nostrils and suddenly, without warning, she puked. Her Fancy Feast cat food came out in chunks all over Lenny.

  “Eeeew!” The black cat dropped the dinner and looked down at his now orange-colored fur. Diamond took that moment to run to the flowerbed and lay low.

  “Come on, boys, quick! Let’s head to the Smith’s; they have a swimming pool.” Lenny was utterly disgusted by the incident, and so was Diamond.

  Yes! I’m here first, Pussface thought, until noticing the smelly gifts sprawled next to the garbage lid. “Where is everyone? Oh no, maybe Diamond actually fell for the sleaze. I’m a lot better looking than he is! But of course, I wasn’t here on time.” He sighed deeply, looking around the dark yard, which was illuminated by bright foliage.

  With head down, he sulked away, then returned with a brown paper bag in his mouth. A light was flickering from within, and he set it in the middle of the grass.

  After Pussface left, Diamond approached the glowing bag curiously. With a paw, she carefully opened the top. Yellow glimmered out and across her pale fur. Inside, the bug’s wings fluttered and its body lit up like a light bulb.