The Last Family Road Trip

by Matthew S. Cox

  It takes every bit of my willpower not to laugh. Between his super-serious expression and total belief that he’s wearing a magic amulet like something out of a video game, it’s almost too much.

  “Besides,” whispers Ben. “It’s daytime now. The fiend will be sleeping until the sun goes down.”

  “But isn’t this a cave?” I ask, knowing full well he’s pretty much right. At least, for other bloodlines.

  Cody goes off on this whispery ramble about how vampires are beholden to some sort of cosmic law that forces them to turn back into corpses until the sun goes down.

  Hank snaps out of it and acts like nothing happened. His denial that he’d been standing around like a mannequin for almost two minutes sets off an argument with the wife who accuses him of messing with her head.

  “So what happens if one of them is on an airplane flying west fast enough to always stay where it’s night time?” I ask.

  They both stare at me with caveman faces.

  “Okay, everyone. Time to move on,” says Chris with a smile. “This way…”

  He leads the group down another tunnel to a rock slide. Sam rushes for it while Sophia clings to Dad, terrified.

  He kisses her atop the head and hands her to me, whispering, “Go with Sarah. She can make sure you don’t go too fast.”

  “Oh, yeah.” She sniffles and wipes her eyes.

  I sit at the top of the slide with Soph in my lap. The girl’s ten but she’s so skinny I barely notice her weight. Granted, my being supernaturally strong makes a lot of things feel light. On the way down, I control our speed enough that she doesn’t freak out at hurtling into a cave tunnel. Not that it would be that bad otherwise.

  The tour lingers for a bit in the ‘Grand Canyon’ room before continuing past a spot Chris calls the ‘brown waterfall.’ Naturally, that name gives Sam the giggles. What is it with boys and poop jokes? It isn’t water at all, but a rock formation that looks like a giant pot of chocolate pudding exploded and ran down the wall. The deeper we go, the more Mrs. Peters mutters to herself about something being ‘not right’ in here.

  Chris calls the next chamber the ‘Garden of the Gods,’ and it’s… pink.

  And I don’t mean trick lights. The rocks really are the color of raspberry sherbet. Dayum. This is kinda cool. Cue squee explosion in three… two… one…

  “Ooh! Faerie castles,” whispers Sophia, pointing at tall rock formations that do kinda resemble something a faerie might live in.

  Sierra’s eyes-half-closed sigh apologizes to the rest of the tour group for our sister being so twee.

  At least my siblings are fascinated by the caverns. The awestruck look on Sophia’s face at seeing a ginormous cavern of pink is totally worth this whole trip. I take about a dozen pictures of her, as well as Sierra and Sam who aren’t quite as enthralled. Naturally, Sierra has decided to distance herself from acting impressed because she is the anti-pink. I spend a while following the three littles around making sure they don’t break anything or fall down some treacherous shaft.

  “Whoa,” mutters Ben.

  I glance over my shoulder. He’s showing the ring to Cody while shrouding it with his other hand. The thing’s practically a light bulb. Wow. That’s not good. I don’t think it reacts to ‘power level’ as much as proximity. And whatever it’s picking up isn’t me.

  “Mom,” whispers Cody.

  Mrs. Peters spins in place like a woman trapped in a burning house with nowhere to go. She probably can’t wait to get out of here at this point. I peek into her thoughts, and my eyes widen in surprise that she senses a dark presence pervading the area. She goes from scared to angry in a split second as the realization that someone or something is touching her mind reaches her awareness.

  I back out and whirl away, breaking eye contact before she can look at me. Now that’s trippy. The woman really is a psychic. Or something. She’s definitely a mortal. That makes me wonder if Agent Han might have some real tricks up her sleeve. Of the two PIBs (People in Black) to check me out after my inglorious flight from the morgue, she was the most poised… almost like she didn’t fear me at all.

  Then again, I am the ‘growling hamster’ of vampires.

  Wonder if she trusted my personality or if she had more faith in her secrets to protect her? If that woman is an actual psychic, what else is out there?

  “This place is so cool!” chirps Sophia.

  “Yeah,” says Sierra in a begrudging tone. “Camping’s kinda lame, but the cavern’s pretty neat. These rocks all look like candle wax.”

  “There’s definitely a vampire in this cave,” whispers Cody… from thirty feet or so away.

  I smile to myself. Well, he’s not exactly wrong there. There is a vampire in the cave. But I resent being called a ‘fiend of the night.’

  “We should sneak back in here after the tour and find the entrance to its lair so we can stake it!” rasps Ben.

  A little twinge picks at my chest where that idiot in the van shot me with the stupid crossbow. I’m briefly tempted to warn them that stakes don’t do anything, but there’s no possible way for me to say something like that without giving myself away. They’d probably think I’m messing with them anyway since I’ve been going the ‘doesn’t believe in vampires’ route.

  Honestly, I probably should give them a compulsion to forget they saw me… but ugh. Too much work. Fate should be happy I’m picking my clothes up off the floor now. That’s me still being overjoyed to be home and alive, with my family. Well, not so much the ‘alive’ part, but I meant that in the sense of not gone. In twenty years, will I still feel that way or go back to my pre-death habit of sorting my clothing on the floor in a process of highly organized randomness.

  Yes, I’m aware that makes no sense.

  Ben and Cody keep whispering at each other, plotting their attack on the big, badass vampire who lives in this cave. Half of me wants to laugh at the absurdity of it, the other half worries there might actually be something here. At least they don’t suspect me of anything, though I’m not sure why they would at this point. Going out in the sun is a pretty good technique to throw vampire hunters off my tail. Speaking of my tail, perhaps I should do something about Ben’s fixation on me.

  Nah. They’re from California. I can’t take away a boy’s first futile crush.

  But anyway, a little good news: they don’t suspect me at all. Bad news: something is probably here. If it’s tweaking Mrs. Peters out, it might not be too friendly.

  “Hey,” says Ben. “We should cool it with the vampire stuff in front of Sarah. She’s gonna think we’re nuts or immature.”

  “Dude.” Cody grabs his brother by both shoulders and looks him in the eye. “You’re never going to see her again. They’re from Washington. It doesn’t matter what she thinks of you. Besides, she’s like thirteen. She might think it’s cool.”

  My eyes narrow. Thirteen now? Grr.

  “No way, dude. She’s at least fifteen. She’s too tall to be thirteen.”

  “Girls grow up different,” says Cody.

  “Her boobs are way too big for thirteen.”

  Okay, now I’m blushing. Without thinking about it, I tug my sweatshirt tighter.

  Cody folds his arms. “Two words for you, man. Alisha Ralston.”

  Ben whistles. “Okay.”

  “Just don’t get all worked up over her, okay? They live a thousand miles away. And, there’s no time for girls. We have a fiend to destroy.”

  Ugh. I facepalm, shaking my head. These two are too much.

  10

  Snooping Around

  Voices murmuring inches from my head pull me out of sleep.

  “Dude, look. It’s totally blacked out.”

  “So? That doesn’t mean anything. Lots of cars have tint.”

  The Brothers Dimm must be outside the RV, specifically standing right by my window. Once again, Dad evidently transplanted me from the floor to the bed after they woke up in the morning. My bones aren’t made out of lead toda
y, so I’m reasonably sure it’s overcast, as the rest of yesterday was not.

  Fortunately, I didn’t need a lame excuse to get away from the boys after the cave tour as they hurried off to put ‘Operation Fiend Kill’ into motion. Seriously… that’s what they called it. Anyway, I spent the remainder of the afternoon in the bedroom reading while the rest of the family went off for another hike. Sophia wanted to try one of the night tours of the cave since they go to different chambers, but Dad had no interest in another trudge up the trail so soon.

  So, once the sun decided to stop messing with me yesterday, I took the littles… and I’m trying really damn hard not to think about what our parents might’ve done with two hours and the whole RV to themselves. With any luck, neither of them had enough energy left for much more than lounging.

  The cave had a super-intense vibe, though nothing showed itself. Our tour guide, Joanne, called the end of the tunnel past the Garden of the Gods the ‘Bacon Room.’ I have no damn idea why they call the stuff on the walls ‘bacon.’ It didn’t look anything like it to me—more like Banksy got high on tainted weed.

  I did, however, notice a weird glowing spot on the wall, a circle a little bigger around than a quarter with a line dangling from the side and some weird little markings around it like something out of Skyrim. My sibs couldn’t see it, so I asked the tour guide. She couldn’t see it either. After she denied it existing despite us standing right in front of it, I erased my mention of it from her thoughts.

  Anyway. I’m awake and I have stalkers. Great. Would they even know I’m in the RV?

  “Dude, you’ve got vampires on the brain,” says Ben. “You’re seeing them everywhere now.”

  “That ring,” snaps Cody, “didn’t start glowing until that girl showed up. If you didn’t like her, you would think the same thing I do.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous, man. She was out in the sun.”

  Cody chuckles. “Yeah, wearing a hoodie. And she didn’t sweat at all on the hike. Didn’t even look tired.”

  “Her sisters and brother didn’t look tired either,” says Ben.

  “Yeah, but they sweat. She walked the whole way up the trail and the whole cave, didn’t ever breathe hard. And what about that guy who stood there like a zombie for a minute after the lights came on?”

  “Maybe he’s like epileptic or something and the lights messed with him?” asks Ben.

  “Dude. Don’t be a dumbass. She totally brain zapped him so she could bite him. One sec she’s gone, then she appears out of nowhere? Probably thought we couldn’t see. Your ring is pretty bright.”

  Ugh.

  I roll out of bed and hurry into an Evanescence T-shirt, jeans, and my sneakers while the boys argue about breaking (or not breaking) into the RV and ‘dealing with me.’ Dammit. I should’ve made them forget me in the cave yesterday when I had my abilities. Or at least implanted the notion that I am not a vampire. Guess I have’ta do what I can now the old-fashioned way. Cringing for the expected blast of ‘day heat,’ I open the door to the outer area of the RV. The warmth isn’t bad at all. Sam’s frogs pivot to stare at me as I go by, but they’re not giving off the super-creepy vibe they did the other day. Huh… wonder if anything happened there or I imagined it.

  The day is dreary and overcast, threatening rain. A stiff but not overbearing wind rolls down from the hills. Were I alive, I might even find it chilly. I ease myself off the two metal steps attached to the RV and sneak to my right toward the back end, then creep around the corner to peer at the driver’s side. Ben and Cody are still outside the window of the extended bedroom section, engaged in a whispered debate about my theoretical vampireness.

  Without even trying to hide, I walk right up to them unnoticed. “Hey, what’s up?”

  The boys spin. Ben jumps back, looking about to faint.

  Cody drops into a fighting stance. “How are you outside in the sunlight?”

  I drop an epic eye roll. “What?”

  “We’re on to you, fiend.” Cody points at me.

  “You two seriously think I’m a vampire?” I laugh. “What are you planning to do, stake me?”

  Cody narrows his eyes. “Well, my brother does want to stab you, but not with a piece of wood.”

  Ben gasps at him, then blushes hard.

  I can’t believe he actually said that. I’m too shocked to react for a good eight or nine seconds before I fall against the RV, in tears laughing. Ben shrinks in on himself, glaring at his brother with this look that makes me think Cody’s the most likely person in this campground to have a stake jammed into his chest.

  “Guys… seriously. I have a boyfriend already. And I’m older than I look.”

  “See!” yells Cody. “I told you.”

  Sigh. “I’m eighteen.”

  Ben blinks. “Whoa, really?”

  “Yeah. And geez, guys. Come on. Vampires? Besides, hello”—I hold my arms out to the side, basking in the feeble gloom of a rainy day—“sunlight.”

  “Why’s the window tinted black?” Cody points at it.

  “How should I know?” I shrug. “It came that way. We’re only renting this monster. It is a bedroom. Maybe it’s for privacy.”

  They both take on this deflated ‘oh, yeah, that makes sense’ posture.

  “Wait.” Cody looks at me. “Your brother said you stopped taking karate at thirteen. If you’re eighteen, how are you still in shape?”

  I glance down at myself. “I’m not in that good of shape… unless scrawny is a shape. Guess I don’t weigh that much or whatever. Besides, it’s only walking. Running really kicks my ass. My high school was huge. Had to walk back and forth across the campus every damn day.”

  “Was?” asks Ben. “Did it get smaller?”

  “No, dumbass. She graduated.” Cody play-punches him on the shoulder. “If she’s really eighteen.”

  “Sorry to disappoint, but I am.” I step right up on Ben so he notices I’m… about the same height. “Okay, great. We’re both five-three. So I’m a little short. Really, Ben. I’m eighteen, graduated from high school, going to college in a month or so.”

  He sighs.

  “Hey, four years isn’t that big a gap. Mom and Dad are six years apart,” says Cody.

  “One, it is a big deal when crossing the eighteen line, and two, I have a boyfriend already. No, I’m not just saying that to get rid of you. If I wanted to tell you to get lost, I’d tell you to get lost.” I smile.

  “So, umm, why are you still here alone?” asks Cody.

  “Had some stomach issues. Didn’t want to get too far away from a bathroom this morning.”

  “Oh.” Cody shrugs in disappointment.

  “What’s wrong?” I ask.

  “We thought you were a vampire. I wanted to finally get one.”

  I chuckle. “Why do you guys believe in that stuff anyway?”

  Cody looks me up and down. “You’re trying too hard to say they’re not real. I call that suspicious.”

  “That’s called being a rational person.” I fold my arms. “Ask anyone in this campsite if they think vampires are real and you might find one kook who says yes. What makes you two so sure?”

  “We saw one once,” says Ben, staring at the ground. “I was six, Cody seven. We were at our grandma’s place out on the back porch at night. This woman came by, walking her dog across the street, and a vampire grabbed her from between two houses and bit her. He didn’t see us.”

  “As soon as he disappeared, we ran inside.” Cody’s expression hardens. “They found that woman dead a couple days later. Said coyotes got her… but we know what really happened.”

  “Wow. That’s…” I shiver. “Are you really sure you saw what you saw? You were so little then. It could’ve been a mugger or something.”

  Ben shakes his head, still not looking up. “Muggers don’t have red glowing eyes.”

  Grr. Guess I’m stuck hanging out with them for a while to prove I’m not a vampire. Ooh. I’ll invite them into the back bedroom and do a
little brain surgery. “You guys wanna watch a mo—”

  “Cody? Ben?” shouts Mrs. Peters from the central area by the giant public bathroom.

  “Crap. Gotta go.” Ben finally manages to look up at me, heartbroken.

  Despite him being only fourteen and living far away, I feel bad for the kid. Not that he had any chance whatsoever of becoming my boyfriend, but argh. It’s like I went to the animal shelter to get a puppy, found one, and another one I can’t possibly take home is staring at me from its kennel. Oh, who am I kidding? For puppies, I’d get both. But, that’s an awful analogy. Boys aren’t puppies (though I suppose they come close on comparative destructiveness). I can’t have two boyfriends, and most definitely not with a kid.

  They wave and run off toward their mother.

  Great. I managed to throw them off my trail, but I broke—no. I didn’t break anyone’s heart. I refuse to feel guilty about pointing out the impossibility of a relationship that Ben convinced himself might happen. It’s not like I flirted or anything. Okay, maybe it would’ve been better if I told them I was eighteen right away, but still.

  If I learned anything from Scott, it’s that I’m not responsible for what goes on in a boy’s head with no input from me. Okay, these days, I can be responsible for what goes on in their heads, but only if I dive in. And ugh. If the two of them really did see a vampire attack some woman years ago, they might know enough to eventually catch me. Cody sure looks obsessive enough to have studied everything he can possibly find about vampires.

  Between these two and wanting to get my family as far away as possible from whatever is lurking in that cave… maybe I should pressure the ’rents to cut this trip a little short.

  11

  Family Time

  While it’s overcast enough to be tolerable outside, no sense burning energy when I don’t have to. I hide in the back bedroom and dig Runaway out of the box of DVDs. Wow… the special effects didn’t age well at all. Their computer graphics look totally dated, and supposedly futuristic robots combined with cars that look old fashioned give it a real weird vibe. This movie is older than I am. Then again all my dad’s favorite movies are older than I am.