by Olivia Miles
And look where my decisions have gotten me, Sam thought. He was alone, and the only person in this world who really knew him, really cared about him, might end up hating him forever.
The cab driver glanced at the rearview mirror and caught Sam’s eye. “At the corner?”
Sam looked out the window at the rows of brick apartment buildings and nodded stiffly. “Right here, actually.”
He paid the fare quickly and opened the door. It was a humid day and his shirt clung to his back, reminding him of all those long summer evenings he’d spent here with his grandmother. She’d sip lemonade and chat with the neighbors, while he rode his secondhand bike on the sidewalk, sometimes all the way down to the corner store to get a Popsicle from the freezer. He could still remember the merriment in her kind blue eyes when she took a wet dish towel and wiped his face clean, clucking her tongue in mock sternness.
The street felt different, somehow. The trees felt bigger. The apartment building, smaller. He hadn’t been back to this neighborhood since his grandmother had died; when the only family he knew was gone, and an entire family he didn’t know was still out there somewhere.
He’d been lonely. Lonely and scared and determined. He’d thrown himself into his studies, into bettering his life. There were no fallbacks. No home to return to anymore. When the other kids in his dorm went home for the holidays, Sam stayed behind. When summer break came along, he found part-time work and temporary roommates. He researched Preston Crawford, poring over the details he discovered, trying to form a complete picture of this man. His father. He had to know. He had to find out more. He knew he wouldn’t stop until he did.
Sam shoved his hands in his pockets and walked down the street, making a loop around the block. He recognized a building where his best childhood friend had lived and frowned, wondering what had happened to the guy. Maybe he was married, maybe he had kids. Maybe his parents still lived in the cozy two-bedroom apartment that Rex would no doubt scoff at. Up ahead was the playground—he used to spend hours on those monkey bars, trying to beat his best time across to the other side. Children were shouting and squealing, running up the stairs and pushing their way down the slide. Sam settled on a bench under a maple tree and watched them play, just as his grandmother had all those years ago.
He hadn’t forgotten a thing. Not one damn thing. Not the way he’d cried for a father when all the other kids at school bragged about going to ball games with their dads, not the way he had looked at himself in the mirror and wondered why his own father didn’t want him, why he was worthless. And not the way his grandmother had brushed away his tears and set him straight, and told him that Preston Crawford didn’t deserve him, and that Sam was better off not knowing him at all.
Sam stood and rolled back on his heels. Maybe he would have been. Or maybe it was better to know, to give it his all, and to admit defeat.
After a while, Sam walked a few blocks to a busy intersection and hailed a cab. He stared silently out the window as it transported him back to Manhattan—the whole other world he’d built for himself.
The doorman greeted him in the lobby and pressed the elevator button for him. Sam stepped inside the cool, air-conditioned box, letting the sweat roll off his body until a chill coated his skin. His apartment was the only one on the floor, and when the door slid open he walked into the living room, the vast empty space, the wall of windows with a view of Central Park and the buildings behind it, and somewhere far beyond, the place where he’d grown up.
And the place he’d left behind.
Chapter Thirteen
The Chicago skyline sat in the distance against a bright blue backdrop. Not a cloud was in the sky. Sam sank back against the leather headrest of the limo, watching as the buildings grew closer and wishing he could run in the opposite direction. There had been a steady breeze when they’d come out of the airport; it was perfect boating weather. Only there wouldn’t be a date with Lila on the lake today. And there might never be one again.
“Is the freelance copywriter going to be there?” Rex asked. The brothers had spent most of the plane ride in tense silence, and Sam sadly admitted to himself they had little in common outside the business and their desire to earn their father’s respect.
Sam shifted his gaze to Rex, who was leaning against the opposite car window, staring at him expectantly for an answer. “I don’t know,” he said, thinking of the calls he hadn’t returned and hating himself for it. He hadn’t been able to bring himself to listen to the messages Lila had left either. He was afraid. Afraid that the sound of her voice would make him lose his nerve. Afraid of what would happen if the one thing he’d lived for was finally gone. Twelve years of his life had gone into becoming his father’s son. If he wasn’t that, then what was he?
A coward, he thought, scowling. “I didn’t invite her, but Reed Sugar might have.”
“Guess it doesn’t matter,” Rex said with a shrug, and Sam said nothing. It hadn’t occurred to him until now that Lila might be there, that he’d have to see the question in her eyes, see the look on her face when she saw him walk in with Rex. She’d assume the worst of him. She’d think he’d gone behind her back. And hadn’t he, in a way?
“We’re almost there,” Sam said, as the driver moved into the right lane.
“Let’s make this quick and easy, Sam,” Rex warned. “If they want our business, they have to play by our rules.”
Sam shifted his gaze to the back of the driver’s seat, unable to even look his brother in the eye. “I can handle this. I don’t even know why you insisted on coming,” he added.
“To show them we mean business,” Rex said. “And to make sure you don’t waver on account of that girl.”
“Give me some credit,” Sam snapped, his eyes blazing as he glared at his brother, thinking back on what he’d done, the choice he’d already made, the look in Lila’s eyes when she’d walked out of the agency that terrible day. There had been one mission in his life—one—and yet even now, after everything, it was still just out of reach.
Rex’s phone pinged and he glanced at the screen, momentarily distracted. Sam set his hands on his briefcase, contemplating its contents, the presentation that was built on Lila’s ideas. They were exiting the highway now. There wasn’t much time left.
“I’d still like to know how the hell they found out about Jolt Coffee,” Rex mused.
“It doesn’t matter,” Sam replied. Dread was building as quickly as their drive was ending. They’d be there any minute. “The bottom line is they know, and soon everyone else will, too.”
“Well, that’s cynical of you, Sam.”
Something suddenly clicked. “Jolt Coffee is one of Reed’s clients. They supply the sugar packets.”
A slow, wry smile curved Rex’s mouth. “Jesus. You’re right.”
Sam shifted in his seat and leveled his brother with a hard look. “Tell me, Rex, do you care about anything, and I mean anything, other than this damn company?”
“Hey, that’s my family’s company you’re talking about,” Rex hissed. “It’s a part of me in a way you could never understand.”
Sam stared at his brother, unable to say anything. His chest rose and fell with each breath, and his heart was beginning to pound with awareness. The agency was their father’s baby—his first love. Maybe his only love. And Rex was just as desperate to compete with it as Sam was. But there was no rising above it, and no winning.
He felt sad for his brother. But he could only feel angry with himself. He was the lucky one, after all. For eighteen years, he’d known something better.
The driver swerved to a stop at the curb. Sam peered out the window for any sign of Lila inside, but the dark interior of the restaurant proved his effort impossible.
Rex paid the driver and reached for the door handle. “Ready?”
Sam didn’t move. It was now or never. He’d been given a second chance in life. With a family. And with Lila. What happened today would change everything.
“I hav
e a stop to make before the meeting,” Sam said. His voice was tight with nerves, of the realization of what he was setting in motion.
Rex checked his watch. “Our meeting is in an hour!”
“This won’t take long,” Sam replied.
Rex’s jaw pulsed, but he released the latch. “Don’t mess this up, Sam,” he said, as he climbed out of the car and slammed the door shut.
Sam let out a breath he hadn’t even known he’d been holding.
Oh, I don’t intend to, he thought.
***
Lila pulled open the door to the café, closed her eyes, and took a good long breath. She loved the smell of freshly ground coffee, and today she loved it a little more than usual. She was depending on it, after all, to get her through what was panning out to be a very long Monday.
“What’ll it be today?” Hailey grinned from behind the counter. “A croissant?” Lila’s standard order if she went beyond a regular drip. “A lemon bar?” A summer treat.
“An extra large cappuccino and a double fudge brownie,” Lila replied.
Hailey’s smile immediately slipped. No good news ever called for that brownie. “Uh-oh. What happened?”
Lila hesitated, and then thought, What the heck? There was little point in being an independent contractor if you couldn’t roll in a little late sometimes, and besides, she could use a friend right now. Anything beat sitting in that office, working on the Reed account, and wondering what on earth was going on with it.
The more time that ticked by without a call from Sam, the more suspicious she was becoming. And paranoia didn’t sit well with her. It made her stomach hurt, and it left circles under her eyes that no amount of cold compresses could fix.
Hailey prepared the drink and handed her a mug. Lila took a sip. Ah. Now this would do the trick.
She paid for the items and took them over to the counter, where she could chat with Hailey near the espresso machine. The device hissed and steamed and the smell alone could perk her up. Already the day felt a little brighter.
But only a little.
“Okay, what did he do?” Hailey asked.
“How’d you know it was a he?”
Hailey lifted an eyebrow. “Isn’t it always?”
Lila laughed. Sadly, it usually was. “Okay, yes, there is a guy, but it’s not the kind of trouble you think.” Well, it was, but Lila didn’t feel like getting into the way her heart felt like it was being twisted and pulled in every possible direction, and the only reason she felt justified in eating what was probably a one-thousand-calorie dessert for breakfast was because she’d been unable to keep anything down yesterday. She was lovesick. She knew all the signs. She’d experienced them before . . . the last time Sam broke her heart.
“Go on,” Hailey nudged. She poured some milk into a stainless steel cup and began frothing it.
Lila watched her work for a moment, thinking of where to even begin, when her phone rang. Her heart jumped, and she tipped over the tall mug, spilling the hot drink all over the counter and, unfortunately, the delicious brownie.
Hailey dropped a rag on the table. “Don’t worry about it. You just answer your phone. Something tells me it might be him.”
Lila hated the surge of hope that had crept into her chest. Something told her it might just be Sam, too.
She fumbled to get the phone out of her bag, her mind racing with everything she would say when she finally got her chance. If he thought she was going to make this easy for him, he had another thing coming. He’d have to have a damn good excuse to make up for this one.
But as much as she was furious, a bigger part of her was relieved. He was calling. They’d talk about Reed. Everything might be okay. After all, the meeting was still two days away.
Lila pulled the device free and turned it over to connect the call, but her breath caught when she saw the name on the screen. Jeremy Reed. This couldn’t be good.
She tapped a button and pressed the phone to her ear. “Hello?”
“Lila, it’s Jeremy. Listen, I wanted to let you know my first appointment ran long and we’re running a little late.”
Lila frowned. “Excuse me?”
“We’ll probably be there by quarter after. Sorry about this.”
Lila gripped the phone tighter. Her heart was doing jumping jacks. “Jeremy, I’m sorry, I—I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“The meeting? This morning? Sam pushed the date up.” In the background, another man’s voice could be heard. Mitch Reed. They were all together. All prepped and ready, while she . . .
Lila blinked. The room around her had gone dark, the voice on the other end of the phone, gone. The blood was rushing in her ears, making her mind spin and her fingers tremble.
“Lila? Did I lose you?”
“I’m still here, Jeremy,” she managed. She chewed her bottom lip, knowing she had to think fast. So he’d done it. He’d gone behind her back and set something up, deliberately choosing to cut her out of the deal, even when he knew what she stood to lose, how important her family’s business was to her. She’d let him into her world, into the part of her soul she had shielded him from all these years.
And he didn’t care. Not about her. Not about Mary. Not about Sunshine Creamery.
She winced when she thought of her sister and how crushed she looked when they talked about selling the parlor.
Mary deserved more. This was Lila’s moment to make that happen.
She let out a slow breath. She couldn’t get emotional now. Not with so much at stake.
She had learned from Sam, and in that way, she had learned from the best. She would go the meeting with Reed, and so help her, she would land that account. With or without Sam Crawford.
***
Lila set her phone back in her bag and stood. She had to hurry. She had to get back to the office and make some notes, then she had to flag down a cab to take her downtown. Did she even have enough cash on her? Oh, and this outfit! She’d worn a sundress today, taking into account only the morning forecast and not the possibility of a meeting.
It would have to do. She had no choice. Sam hadn’t left her with one.
“Bad news?” Hailey looked worried as she handed Lila another cappuccino. This one in a lidded paper cup.
“You could say that again,” Lila muttered. “Thanks for this. I’m gonna need it.”
“But you never told me what happened with that guy!” Hailey called after her as Lila wove her way through the people lining up for their morning caffeine fix.
Lila pushed open the door and looked back at her friend. “Let’s just say there’s nothing to tell,” she said, because there wasn’t. Everything that had happened last week had been an illusion. And now, it was time to face reality.
Lila scurried down the sidewalk, her bag in one hand, her drink in the other, trying not to slosh the beverage as she hurried up the steps of the brownstone of her office. Jim Watson was just getting in, too. He was often late on Mondays; sometimes he’d poke his head in, ask the girls about their weekend, but as Lila rushed passed him, he simply stood back to let her pass. Lila flashed him a smile of gratitude. It was nice to know there were still some nice men in the world.
“Was that Jim I saw coming in just now?” Penny asked as Lila hurried into her office.
She flicked on the light and turned on her laptop. “Yep.”
“Oh.” Penny stood and came closer to her office. “That looked like a new shirt he was wearing. I don’t think I’ve ever seen it before.”
Lila glanced up from the computer screen. Penny was standing in the doorway, but her neck was craned as she stared at the front door, even though it was closed. Her blond bob was pulled back in a headband, and there was a telltale smudge of lipstick on her mouth. A new shade, Lila observed.
The laptop had finished powering up, and Lila quickly clicked on the folder where she kept all her notes pertaining to Reed. She’d planned to share all this with Sam, but now she’d take it directly to the clien
t. Some of the ideas were nothing more than half-formed bullet points, but it would have to be enough. She’d talk through it. She was good on her feet. When she needed to be.
And she needed to be her best today. Now more than ever.
“Jim and I ended up on the same ‘L’ train the other night,” Penny was saying.
Lila looked up distractedly, unsure of what to say. “That’s nice. Does he live near you?”
“It turns out he does.” Penny blushed. “We talked a bit. He’s a nice man. I never noticed how green his eyes are.”
Despite her stress, Lila grinned. “He does have beautiful eyes,” she said with a wink.
The phone at the front desk rang and Penny left to answer it, seeming considerably lighter in her step than she had been just a few days ago. It was funny how love could do that to you, Lila mused. It could lift you up in the most surprising ways.
And it could crash you down when you least expected it.
She gritted her teeth and pulled the notes from the printer, then stuffed them into a folder. She glanced at the cuckoo clock. She’d have to leave soon. Quickly, Lila pulled out her wallet and thumbed through the cash. It would be enough to get her to the restaurant where the meeting was being held. At least that much was under control.
She froze and set a hand on the desk, allowing herself a moment to gather her thoughts. She didn’t know what she would say to Sam when she saw him. How she could even look him in the eye after this kind of betrayal. When she thought of what he’d done. The chain of events that had led to this. The deliberate deception.
Tears prickled the back of her eyes, and she fanned them away. There wasn’t time to cry now. She’d cry later, after she won the account. And so help her, she would win that account.
