Warning at One

by Ann Purser

  Lois shook her head. "I'm okay," she said. "It's in here."

  She turned into the post office and gasped. "What the hell!" she said, and grabbed the edge of the counter to keep her steady. The manager came up beside her and once more took her arm. "Take it easy," he said. "I'm sure there's some explanation."

  They both looked at the stool, still upright but empty. They went behind the counter and found nothing and nobody. Lois was speechless, but not for long. She looked along the counter and said, "Hey! Wait a minute! Look, there's the mug, still half full. No! Don't touch it! And don't let anyone else touch it. Get the police here as soon as possible. I'm going now. I've got a call to make." She took a New Brooms card from her bag and handed it to him. "You can contact me on this number," she said. "The police know it already. And don't look like that! I ain't done nothing wrong. Murder's not in my line. Yet."

  HUNTER COWGILL SAT AT HIS DESK, GOING ONCE MORE THROUGH all the papers relevant to the Clem Fitch case. There must be something here he had missed, and he was desperate to clear up the whole thing. He might then have a chance of putting things right with Lois. It was not until he had seen her reaction to the second bout of questioning inflicted on Douglas that he realised how much he cared for her. In the early days, he just fancied her a lot. He still fancied her a lot. And her feisty spirit amused him. But now he really cared about her and would do everything he could to avoid hurting her or her family.

  Damn! he said, when the phone interrupted his thoughts. "Hello? Who is it?"

  "It's me," Lois said.

  "Lois! What's wrong? Are you all right? Nothing happened to the family?"

  "Which of those questions d'you want answered first?"

  "None of them. I can tell you're fine now. And I can't tell you how glad I am to hear your voice."

  "Well, yeah. Enough of that. There's something important to tell you, otherwise you wouldn't have heard from me. Have you had a call from the museum yet?"

  "No. Why?"

  "Because they've got a dead postmistress in their shopping street. At least, they did have. She's disappeared. And don't think I've lost my marbles. I saw the body myself, and by the time I got the manager bloke, it had gone. Vanished."

  Cowgill said nothing for a few seconds. Then he cleared his throat. "Can you hold on a moment, Lois? Call on another line coming in. Maybe it's the museum."

  It was, and by the time he returned to Lois he had had quite a different account from the one she had given him. The manager had even chuckled. He was used to odd visitors, he said. The period atmosphere of the place seemed to unhinge them. And no, they'd never had a waxwork in the post office, sitting on the stool. Sometimes a member of staff would go in to answer questions.

  "Lois, are you still there? Good. Now, it is most important that I see you straightaway. Can you meet me at the museum in twenty minutes? Where are you now? In your car, outside the reception area. Right, stay there until I come. And lock yourself in."

  "Did he tell you about the mug?" Lois said. "No? Well, better ring him back and tell him not to touch it. If it's still there . . ."

  COWGILL GOT OUT OF HIS CAR IN THE MUSEUM CAR PARK AND walked towards Lois. He did not smile, but indicated to her to let him in. When he was sitting beside her, he turned to her and said, "Do you trust me, Lois?"

  She was taken aback by this, and thought for a second. "Yes, I do," she said, rather to her own surprise. Seeing him again, solid and reliable in the seat beside her, diffused the anger and resentment she had felt. Besides which, she needed him.

  "Well, the feeling is reciprocal," he said.

  "What?"

  "I mean I trust you, too. And now I'll tell you why I needed to say that." He gave her a factual account of what the manager had said, and waited for her reaction. She did not explode, as expected, but nodded.

  "I thought so," she said. "I could tell he didn't believe a word I said. Stupid sod! Did you ask about the mug?"

  "I did. He said he'd seen no mug, and could think of no reason why there should be one. Staff and visitors are not allowed to eat or drink in the exhibition areas. There is a perfectly good café at the end of the tour, and people respect this."

  "He said that, did he? Well, it's his word against mine. Do you still trust me?" Before he could answer, she added, "Oh, and there was something else I forgot to tell you. I wouldn't bother you with ghost rubbish, but I did definitely see a real somebody in the schoolroom as I came through to inform the manager about the dead body. It disappeared fast towards the street."

  She told him about the schoolmaster episode and said he could check that with Maisie the steward. Nothing barmy about me there, she said. Maisie said loads of people had seen him.

  "Ghosts don't do very well as hard evidence," Cowgill said. "But I will, of course, bear it in mind. Come on, then, girl. Let's go back in time for a bit."

  When the manager saw Lois come in with the inspector, he looked embarrassed. As well he might, thought Lois. She kept in the background while the men talked, and then followed them through to the street of shops. "Is it all right if I go and get a coffee?" she said, after hearing Cowgill's conversation with the manager. "I'll be in the café, and won't go away. I promise."

  She's up to something, Cowgill thought, but said that was fine, he'd catch up with her in a short while. If Lois was up to something, it was usually useful.

  In the café, she said hello to the volunteer woman in mobcap and pinny behind the counter, and ordered a coffee. "By the way," she said, smiling at the woman playing her part with such enthusiasm, "did anyone bring you a dirty mug to wash up in the last hour or so? I saw one somewhere around in the exhibits, and feel guilty that I didn't bring it through to you."

  "Don't worry about that, dear," the woman replied. "Our manager brought it back a while ago. He's most particular about that sort of thing, so I won't shop you! Now, I made this lemon sponge first thing this morning, and it's most delicious. Can I tempt you with a slice?"

  "Why not? And thanks for keeping my secret. Don't mention my asking about it, else he'll be on my track and I'll end up being locked in your gloomy-looking Victorian cell!"

  A very satisfactory conversation followed, with both agreeing on how much better it was in the old days, when every village had its local cop and some even had small lockups where villains could be detained overnight to cool their heels.

  Cowgill came in quite soon and sat down with Lois, ordering a coffee for himself. The woman brought it over and winked at Lois. "Here you are, sir," she said. "Are you going to join your wife in having a piece of my lemon cake?"

  Lois opened her mouth to deny any possibility or likelihood of being Cowgill's wife, but he got there first.

  "Thank you, my dear," he said sweetly. "That will be very nice."

  FORTY-NINE

  "HOW WOULD THEY HAVE GOT THE BODY OUT?" DEREK SAID, as they sat at the supper table. He had been really worried about Lois's involvement in what was clearly a very dangerous situation. Whoever they were, and whatever they were up to, they were not amateurs. He believed absolutely that Lois had seen a real dead body, and also a half-full mug on the post office counter. He was impressed that she had had the wit to ask the café woman if anyone had brought such a mug in from the museum. He was proud of her presence of mind, but was also extremely anxious at what this gang might do next.

  "I know how they would have got the body out," Gran said. She was looking pleased with herself, and waited for somebody to ask for more information. Nobody did. "Well," she continued, "since you're so interested, I'll tell you. When I was a girl I knew the daughter of the farmer who lived there when it was a real farmhouse. She came to my school in Tresham for a while. They owned a lot of land and you could tell they were not short of a bob or two. I used to go and play with the girl, and it was a wonderful place for hide-and-seek an' that. All them barns and dairy buildings and stables were perfect for hiding in."

  "But how would they get from the post office into the farmyard?" Lois c
ould see immediately the problem of getting a body into a vehicle without being seen and at speed.

  Gran smiled. "Ah, well, there it is, you see. It was a bit like now, with connecting doors between all the yard buildings, so's if it was pouring or snowing, they could still get from the house and round the barns an' that without getting soaked. The farmer's wife was delicate. At least, she said she was, but my mum knew the dairy woman and she'd seen the missus taking regular vigorous exercise up in the hayloft with the young stockman at the time."

  "Mum!" Lois said. "That's ancient gossip. What you just said doesn't explain how they got into the courtyard without being seen."

  "Easy peasy," said Gran. "All the buildings also had doors into the yard, o' course. The pretend post office is next to the old store what had double doors for feed being unloaded. It's still used as a storeroom. All the body snatchers had to do was back their van right in through the doors, nip into the PO and do the deed, then whiz the body out into next door, and shove it straight into the van without anybody seeing. You said there were very few people about. It was a bit of a risk, I suppose, but they got away with it."

  Derek was looking more and more alarmed. "Now you listen to me," he said to Lois. "These are a desperate lot who obviously think nothing of bumping off anybody who gets in their way. That includes you, and also Douglas. I don't want you havin' anythin' more to do with it. No more heart-tohearts with Cowgill. No more ferretin', not from any of you. It's police business now, and it's their job to run into danger. They get paid for it. So, family and New Brooms only from now on. An' that's an order."

  Even while he was saying it, he knew he was wasting his breath. Snooping was in Lois's bones. She couldn't stop now. And this time it was worse, because her own son was under suspicion. The best he could hope for was that she would be very wary and not do anything really stupid.

  "Brilliant deduction, Mum," said Lois, as if Derek had not spoken. "Only one problem: how did they open the double doors? They would certainly have been locked."

  "Somebody planted at the museum specially to pinch a key and open the doors for them?"

  Derek laughed. "If you remember, Gran dear," he said, "all the stewards are decent retired people with not a stain on their character. You'll have to do better than that."

  Lois said nothing, but remembered vividly the slumped figure of a retired grey-haired lady, to most eyes a pillar of respectability, but to Lois a skinny man dressed as a woman, cleverly disguised, and a plant with guaranteed evil intent. If one, why not another?

  "Mum might have something there," she said. "There must have been at least three of them to do it so quickly. We need to ask around and see if—"

  "Lois!" exclaimed Derek. "What did I just say? Leave it alone! And that goes for you, too, Gran. I don't know what the pair of you think you're doing. There's plenty of work for you to do here, Gran, without wasting time cooking up fairy stories, and as for Lois . . ."

  "Yes?" said Lois.

  "I give up," said Derek, and stumped off out of the room.

  Silence reigned in the kitchen for a minute or so, and then

  Lois said, "You're a natural, Mum. Now I know where I get it from."

  "HELLO, MY DEAR," SAID THE MOBCAP LADY IN THE CAFÉ. "HUBBY not with you today?"

  Lois knew she meant Cowgill, and was tempted to put her right. But then she would probably think Lois was trying to cover her tracks after an illicit lovers' meeting.

  "Yep," she said. "Can't resist your lemon drizzle cake. And a nice hot cup of tea, please." She stood at the counter waiting to be served and looked around the big room. One side looked out to the fields beyond, and the other into the farmyard at the back. So Mobcap could have seen something. "I expect you see all kinds of comings and goings in the yard. Must break up the boredom when there's no customers," she said.

  "Oh, you'd be surprised! Couples having a quick smooch, men having a pee into the drain in the corner. And we've got smart new toilets! Honestly, people have no shame these days. Mind you, they don't realise I'm looking. The window is quite small, and they'd have trouble seeing me."

  "Didn't seem much going on when I was here yesterday," Lois said, taking her tea and cake to her seat. "I reckon I was the only person here for a while."

  "Oh, no," said Mobcap, defending the popularity of the museum, "we had quite a few in. And then there are deliveries out in the yard. Vans unload most days. There's a general store over there. There was one yesterday, though you probably didn't see it. But it shows you how much stuff we get through. There's the shop, the café, the offices. We all need supplies."

  Lois smiled. "So what did they bring for you?" she said.

  "Nothing at all yesterday. Actually, I didn't recognise that van. Couldn't see much. But there were three men, so they must have been delivering something heavy. Probably a new filing cabinet or something like that. Our manager, between you and me, is a bit free with the museum's lolly! Always a new gadget arriving."

  "Sounds intriguing," said Lois lightly. "A dirty white van draws up outside the double doors, three men get out, disappear, and are back in minutes. They drive off at speed."

  "How did you know all that?" said Mobcap. "All exactly right, except for two things. They didn't go to the double doors—they were backed up close to the door out of the post office—and they weren't gone in minutes. Leastways, the first time I looked they had just arrived. Next time they all came scuttling out again. They sat in the van for a while, and then got out and loaded up something. I couldn't see much, the way they'd parked the van. Then they were off like bats out of hell! Still, you were nearly right. You ought to be a detective," she added, and began to wipe down her surfaces.

  FIFTY

  "SO SOMEBODY UNLOCKED THE YARD DOOR OF THE POST OFFICE," Josie said.

  She and Lois, with Douglas and Susie, were sitting in the Long Farnden kitchen, while Gran was busy with kettle, mugs, and plates of biscuits newly baked that afternoon. Derek was staying late to finish a job over at Ringford. He'd gone to fix a wall heater in Ivy Beasley's bathroom, and she had him more or less at gunpoint to get it finished.

  "What about that manager chap, Mum?" Douglas asked. "It was him that took the mug away to the café, didn't you say?"

  "So the mobcap woman said. I guess she would know the manager pretty well."

  Douglas frowned. "He could have some other reason to take the mug. Supposing he thought he'd left it there himself, thereby breaking the rules. He'd want to keep quiet about it to you and Cowgill, wouldn't he?"

  Josie said with a smile, "And I suppose he was scared that Cowgill would cart him off to prison for such a gross offence? Doesn't wash, Douglas."

  Douglas looked crestfallen, and Lois interrupted in his defence. "It could be something like Douglas said, but I somehow don't think the manager's involved. For one thing, he would have known who—"

  She stopped suddenly. She remembered that she had not yet told them about the victim being Skinny Man in disguise. She could not be absolutely sure until Cowgill let her know once they'd found and examined the body. Then they'd know! The idea that the manager was involved put a whole new complexion on things. It could explain how the skinny man got the job in the first place. On the other hand, the manager could have been very relieved that there was no body and taken the mug against Lois's instructions, just to keep his precious museum blameless.

  "Mum?" said Josie. "What were you going to say?"

  Lois was saved by Gran officiously plonking down mugs of coffee and handing round biscuits. But Josie did not give up. "Come on, Mum," she said. "Who would he have known?"

  "She's not going to tell, Josie," Gran said. "I know that look in her eye."

  "Not that," Lois said. "It's just that I've thought of something, and it'll need to be sorted out before I can tell you. Don't want you all going up the wrong track."

  "Is it all right if I say something?" said Susie, blushing with nervousness. They all assured her she could say anything she liked, especially i
f it would help Douglas.

  "That's what I'm here for," she said, more confidently. "Well, it was at work, when I was on cigarettes and magazines an' that. That big man, the one I've seen going in to Braeside, came up and bought cigarettes and one of them magazines we keep on top shelves. After he'd paid, he didn't go away. Just stared at me. I was beginning to feel a bit scared, when he said he thought he'd seen me somewhere before. I said probably on another counter. We all change and change about. But he said no, it wasn't at work, it was somewhere else. A sort of look went over his face, as if he'd remembered, and then he was pushed from behind by one of them yobs who spend all day sitting on the window ledges outside causing trouble. I've never seen anybody move s' fast! Big man that he is, he hadn't got the courage to face up to the yob. That's all, really, except I don't like the idea of him recognising me . . ."