Little Man, What Now?

by Hans Fallada

  Little Man—What Now?

  First published as Kleiner Mann—was nun?

  by Rowohlt, Berlin, 1932

  © Aufbau-Verlagsgruppe GmbH, Berlin 1994

  (Published with Aufbau; “Aufbau” is a trademark of Aufbau

  Verlagsgruppe GmbH)

  Negotiated by Aufbau Media GmbH, Berlin

  This edition © 2009 Melville House Publishing

  Translation © Susan Bennett, 1996

  This unabridged translation first published by Libris, 1996

  Afterword © Philip Brady, 1996

  Melville House Publishing

  145 Plymouth Street

  Brooklyn, NY 11201

  www.mhpbooks.com

  eISBN: 978-1-61219-064-8

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available

  v3.1

  CONTENTS

  LITTLE MAN—WHAT NOW?

  Cover

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Translator’s Note

  PROLOGUE

  Blithe Spirits

  PART ONE

  The Small Town

  PART TWO

  Berlin

  EPILOGUE

  Life Goes On

  AFTERWORD

  by Philip Brady

  TRANSLATOR’S NOTE

  In the German original Johannes Pinneberg generally calls Emma Morschel (later his wife) ‘Lämmchen’ (lambkin) as a term of affection. This has been lightly anglicized here by omission of the umlaut. Lammchen in turn often calls Johannes ‘Junge’ (laddie). This somewhat old-fashioned term of endearment is translated as Sonny. German place-names have been preserved except where relevant English equivalents exist—like Market Place for ‘Marktplatz’.

  I would like to thank Dr Jenny Williams, of Dublin City University, whose specialized knowledge of Hans Fallada and his times and close familiarity with the original Kleiner Mann have contributed greatly to this translation. Thanks also—posthumously—to Eric Sutton whose racy, albeit abbreviated, thirties translation was often a helpful and sometimes a conclusive point of reference if I was stuck for a word.

  LITTLE MAN—WHAT NOW?

  PROLOGUE

  BLITHE SPIRITS

  PINNEBERG LEARNS SOMETHING NEW ABOUT LAMMCHEN AND TAKES A BIG DECISION

  It was five past four. Pinneberg had just checked his watch. He stood, a fair-haired, neatly-dressed young man, outside number 24 Rothenbaumstrasse, and waited.

  Five past four; and he and Lammchen had agreed to meet at quarter to. Pinneberg had put away his watch and was staring earnestly at a nameplate on the entrance to number 24. He read:

  DR SESAME

  Gynaecologist,

  Consulting hours 9–12 and 4–6

  ‘Exactly! And it’s five past four. Now if I light another cigarette, Lammchen’s going to come round the corner for certain. So I won’t. It’s going to cost enough today as it is.’

  His eyes wandered away from the nameplate. Rothenbaumstrasse had only one row of houses. Across the road, and the strip of green, was the embankment, and beyond that was the Strela, flowing fine and broad here as it neared the Baltic. A fresh wind was blowing towards him which gently bowed the bushes and set the trees lightly rustling.

  ‘That’s the way to live,’ thought Pinneberg. ‘I’m sure that Dr Sesame there has seven rooms. He must earn a packet. What sort of rent would he pay? Two hundred marks, three hundred? Uh. How would I know?—Ten past four!’

  Pinneberg fished in his pocket, took a cigarette out of his case and lit it.

  Round the corner wafted Lammchen, in pleated white skirt and art-silk blouse, hatless, with her blonde hair all blown about. ‘Hello, Sonny. I really couldn’t make it any earlier. Are you cross?’

  ‘Not really. But we’ll have ages to wait. At least thirty people have gone in since I’ve been here.’

  ‘They won’t all have been going to the doctor’s. Anyway we’ve got an appointment.’

  ‘You see. It was right to make an appointment.’

  ‘Of course it was right. You’re always right, Sonny.’ And there on the doorstep, she took his face in her hands and covered it with a storm of kisses. ‘Oh God, Sonny, I’m so glad to see you again. It’s been nearly a fortnight. Can you believe it?’

  ‘I know, Lammchen,’ he replied. ‘I’m not cross any more now.’

  The door opened, and a white shape stood before them in the dim hallway and barked: ‘Medical cards!’

  ‘Let us in first if you don’t mind,’ said Pinneberg and pushed Lammchen in front of him. ‘And we’re private. I have an appointment. My name is Pinneberg.’

  At the word ‘private’ the apparition raised a hand and switched on the light in the hall. ‘The doctor’s just coming. Please wait a moment. In there please.’

  As they went towards the door they passed another which was half open. That must be the ordinary waiting-room, and all the thirty people who Pinneberg had seen coming in past him seemed to be sitting in it. They all looked at the two of them, and a buzz of voices arose:

  ‘That’s not fair.’

  ‘We’ve been waiting longer!’

  ‘What do we pay into the public health scheme for?’

  ‘I’d like to know what makes that stuck-up pair any better than us.’

  The nurse appeared in the doorway: ‘Can we have a bit of quiet, please? You’re disturbing the doctor! It’s not what you think. This is the doctor’s son-in-law and his wife. Isn’t that so?’

  Pinneberg smiled, flattered. Lammchen hurried towards the other door. There was a moment’s quiet.

  ‘Oh, do hurry up,’ whispered the nurse, pushing Pinneberg from behind. ‘Those medical-card patients are so common. What on earth do they think they’re entitled to for the pittance we get from the public scheme?’

  The door swung shut, and Sonny and Lammchen found themselves surrounded by red plush.

  ‘This must be his lounge,’ said Pinneberg. ‘How d’you like it? I think it’s dreadfully old-fashioned.’

  ‘I call that disgusting,’ said Lammchen. ‘We’re usually medical-card patients. Now we know how those women at the doctor’s really talk about us.’

  ‘What are you getting so worked up for?’ he asked. ‘That’s how it is. If you’re a nobody, they can treat you as they like.’

  ‘But it does get me worked up …’

  The door opened and another nurse came in. ‘Mr and Mrs Pinneberg, please? The doctor says he won’t keep you a minute. May I take the particulars while we’re waiting?’

  ‘By all means,’ said Pinneberg. ‘Age?’ asked the nurse briskly.

  ‘Twenty-three.’

  ‘First name: Johannes.’

  After a moment’s hesitation: ‘Book-keeper.’

  Then, more smoothly: ‘I’ve never had any health problems—apart from the usual childhood illnesses. So far as I know, both in good health.’

  Another hesitation. ‘Yes, my mother’s still alive. My father’s not. Can’t say what he died of.’

  Now it was Lammchen’s turn …

  ‘Twenty-two, Emma.’

  This time she was the one to hesitate: ‘Maiden name Morschel. No serious illnesses. Both parents alive. Both in good health.’

  ‘All right. It won’t be long now. The doctor will be with you in a minute.’

  ‘I don’t know what all that’s for,’ he growled, as the door swung shut. ‘When all we want …’

  ‘You weren’t too keen to say “book-keeper”.’

  ‘And what about your “maiden name”?’ He laughed. ‘Emma Pinneberg. Known as Lammchen. Maiden name Morschel. Emma Pinne …’

  ‘Shut up, you. Oh God, Sonny, I’ve simply got to go again. Have you any idea where it is?’
>
  ‘Not again: Why ever didn’t you …’

  ‘I did, Sonny. Really. Just now in the Rathaus Square. It cost a whole groschen. But it always happens when I’m nervous.’

  ‘Lammchen, do please make an effort. If you’ve really only just been …’

  ‘But I have to …’

  ‘This way please,’ said a voice. In the door stood Dr Sesame, the famous Dr Sesame, whose reputation as a sympathetic and, according to some, also a kind-hearted man had spread throughout the town and beyond. He had also written a popular pamphlet on sexual problems, which had given Pinneberg the courage to write making an appointment for Lammchen and himself.

  This, then, was the Dr Sesame at present standing in the doorway, and saying ‘This way, please.’

  Dr Sesame searched on his desk for the letter. ‘You wrote to me, Mr Pinneberg … saying you couldn’t have any children just yet because you couldn’t afford it?’

  ‘Yes,’ said Pinneberg, dreadfully embarrassed.

  ‘You can start undressing,’ said the doctor to Lammchen, and carried on: ‘And you want to know an entirely reliable means of prevention. Hm, an entirely reliable means …’ He smiled sceptically behind his gold-rimmed spectacles.

  ‘I read about it in your book … These pessoirs …’

  ‘Pessaries,’ said the doctor. ‘Yes, but they don’t suit every woman. And it’s always a bit of a business. It depends on whether your wife would be nimble-fingered enough …’

  He looked up at her. She had already taken off her blouse and skirt. Her slim legs made her look very tall.

  ‘Well, let’s go next door,’ said the doctor. ‘You needn’t have taken your blouse off for this, young lady.’

  Lammchen went a deep red.

  ‘Oh well, leave it off now. Come this way. One moment, Mr Pinneberg.’

  The two of them went into the next room. Pinneberg watched them go. The top of the doctor’s head reached no farther than the ‘young lady’s’ shoulders. How beautiful she was! thought Pinneberg yet again; she was the greatest girl in the world, the only one for him. He worked in Ducherow, and she worked here in Platz, and he never saw her more than once a fortnight, so his joy in her was always fresh, and his desire for her absolutely inexpressible.

  Next door he heard the doctor asking questions on and off in a low voice, and an instrument clinking on the side of a bowl. He knew that sound from the dentist’s; it wasn’t a pleasant one.

  Then he winced violently. Never before had he heard that tone from Lammchen. She was saying in a high, clear voice that was almost a shriek—‘No, no, no!’ And once again, ‘No!’ And then, very softly, but he still heard it: ‘Oh God.’

  Pinneberg took three steps towards the door—What was that? What could it be? What about the rumours that those kind of doctors were terrible lechers? But then Dr Sesame spoke again—impossible to hear what he said—and the instrument clinked again.

  Then there was a long silence.

  It was a glorious summer day, around the middle of July, with brilliant sunshine. The sky outside was deep blue, a few twigs poked in at the window, waving in the sea breeze. An old rhyme from Pinneberg’s childhood came into his head:

  Wind, don’t blow

  Wind, don’t puff

  Wind, don’t knock my child’s hat off.

  Wind, be kind

  Wind, be mild

  Wind, be gentle to my child.

  The people in the waiting-room were talking. Time must be dragging for them too. They didn’t know how lucky they were. How lucky …

  The doctor and Lammchen were returning. Pinneberg glanced at her anxiously; her eyes were opened wide, as if she had just had a fright. She was pale, but she smiled at him, wanly at first, but then the smile spread, becoming wider and wider until it lit up her whole face … The doctor stood in the corner and washed his hands, glancing sideways at Pinneberg. Then he said rapidly: ‘It’s a bit too late for prevention, Mr Pinneberg. Nothing to be done now. Beginning of the second month, I’d say.’

  Pinneberg couldn’t breathe, he felt as though he’d been struck. Then he gabbled, ‘But Doctor, it’s impossible. We were so careful. It’s absolutely impossible. You tell him, Lammchen! …’

  ‘Sonny!’ she said. ‘Sonny …’

  ‘It’s true,’ said the doctor. ‘No doubt about it. And believe me, Mr Pinneberg, a child is good for a marriage.’

  ‘Doctor,’ said Pinneberg and his lip trembled. ‘I earn one hundred and eighty marks a month! Please, Doctor!’

  A weary look came over Dr Sesame’s face. He knew what was coming next. He heard it thirty times a day.

  ‘No,’ he said. ‘No. Please don’t even ask me. It’s out of the question. You are both in good health. And your income is not at all bad. Not—at all—bad.’

  ‘Doctor!’ cried Pinneberg feverishly.

  Lammchen stood behind him and stroked his hair. ‘Leave it, Sonny, leave it! It’ll be all right.’

  ‘But it’s absolutely impossible!’ exclaimed Pinneberg—and then stopped. The nurse had come in.

  ‘You’re wanted on the phone, Doctor.’

  ‘You wait and see,’ said the doctor. ‘You’ll be glad in the end. And as soon as the baby arrives, you come straight to me and we’ll see about prevention then. Don’t think it’s safe just because she’s feeding the baby. So, there we are … Courage, young lady.’

  He shook Lammchen by the hand.

  ‘I’d like to …’ said Pinneberg, taking out his wallet.

  ‘Ah yes,’ said the doctor, half-way through the door, and looked once more at the two of them, appraisingly. ‘Well, fifteen marks, sister.’ ‘Fifteen …’ said Pinneberg slowly, and looked towards the door. But Doctor Sesame had already gone. Pinneberg took out a twenty-mark note with a great deal of fuss and watched frowning as the sister wrote out the receipt and handed it to him.

  His forehead cleared a little. ‘I’ll get that back from the health insurance, won’t I?’

  The nurse looked at him, then at Lammchen. ‘Confirmation of pregnancy?’ She didn’t even wait for the answer. ‘No, you won’t. None of the insurance schemes pay out for that.’

  ‘Come on, Lammchen,’ he said.

  They went slowly down the stairs. Lammchen stopped at a landing, and taking one of his hands between her own, said: ‘Don’t be so sad. Please don’t. It’ll be all right.’

  ‘Yes, yes,’ said he, deep in thought.

  They went a little way along Rothenbaumstrasse, then turned off into Mainzerstrasse. There were tall buildings there and a great many people. Lines of cars drove past. The evening papers were out. Nobody paid any attention to the two of them.

  “ ‘Not a bad income”, he said, and then took fifteen marks out of my hundred and eighty. Daylight robbery!’ ‘I’ll manage,’ said Lammchen, ‘I’ll manage somehow.’ ‘Dear Lammchen!’ said he.

  They turned out of Mainzerstrasse into the Krumperweg, and there it was suddenly quiet.

  Lammchen said: ‘That explains a lot of things.’

  ‘What do you mean?’ he asked.

  ‘Oh, nothing really, just that I’ve felt sick every morning. And things were funny, generally …’

  ‘But you must have noticed something.’

  ‘I just kept on thinking, oh, it will come on soon. It’s not the first thing you suspect, is it?’

  ‘Perhaps he’s made a mistake!’

  ‘No. I don’t think so. It all fits.’

  ‘But it could be a mistake.’

  ‘No, I believe …’

  ‘Listen to me, will you! It is possible.’

  ‘Everything’s possible.’

  ‘Perhaps your period will start tomorrow. If it does, I’m going to write that man such a letter!’ He relapsed into thought. He was composing the letter.

  After the Krumperweg came Hebbelstrasse with its beautiful elm trees. The two of them walked deep in thought through the summer afternoon.

  ‘I shall ask for my fifteen marks back as well,�
�� said Pinneberg suddenly.

  Lammchen did not reply. She was concentrating on placing one foot in front of the other and taking great care where she walked. Everything was so different now.

  ‘Where are we going?’ he suddenly inquired.

  ‘I’ve got to get home,’ said Lammchen. ‘I told mother I’d be back.’

  ‘That’s all I need!’ he said.

  ‘Oh don’t start scolding me, Sonny,’ she pleaded. ‘I’ll make sure I can get down again at half-past eight. What train are you catching?’

  ‘The half-past nine.’

  ‘Then I’ll go with you to the station.’

  ‘And that’s it, is it?’ he said. ‘That’s all for another two weeks. What a life!’

  Lütjenstrasse was a real working-class street, always teeming with children, impossible to say goodbye properly there.

  ‘Don’t take it so hard, Sonny,’ she said, taking his hand. ‘I’ll manage.’

  ‘All right,’ he said, and forced a smile. ‘You’re the ace of trumps, Lammchen. You win every trick.’

  ‘And at half-past eight I’ll be down again. Promise.’

  ‘Can’t you kiss me now?’

  ‘No, I can’t, honestly. It would be all over the street in a minute. Cheer up! Do cheer up!’

  ‘Well, all right then, Lammchen,’ he said. ‘Don’t you take it too hard either. It will all work out somehow.’

  ‘Of course it will,’ she said. ‘I’m not going to go all soft just like that, am I? Well, bye-bye for now.’

  She whisked up the dark stairway, her vanity-case knocking against the banisters, tap, tap, tap.

  Pinneberg stared after the gleaming legs. How many thousand times had Lammchen vanished out of his reach up those damned stairs.

  ‘Lammchen!’ he bellowed. ‘Lammchen!’

  ‘Yes?’ she inquired from above, leaning over the banisters. ‘Wait a moment!’ he called. He stormed up the stairs, stood breathless before her and gripped her by the shoulders. ‘Lammchen!’ he said, panting from excitement and lack of air. ‘Emma Morschel! Why don’t we get married?’

  MOTHER MORSCHEL—MR MORSCHEL—KARL

  MORSCHEL: PINNEBERG GETS DRAGGED INTO

  MORSCHELLAND