Silenced 2: The Overtaking (Silenced Series)

by RaeBeth McGee-Buda

  “Actually, Mom I’ve been cutting since we lived here. If anything, Landon has helped me. So don’t even be blaming him for this. You heard the doctor. No one could’ve caused this or stopped it from happening. Have you ever thought that this was caused by you?” I ask her, feeling so much of the adamant feelings I used to have against her.

  I hate when she does this. Instead of figuring out what’s the best way to fix a problem, she finds all the reasons in the world why it’s not her fault. All I know is I really want to go home.

  “Casey, can you find a doctor or nurse and find out when I’m getting the hell out of here? I want to go home.” I ask.

  “Sure.” She says and leaves the room.

  Landon decides to forget what my mom said and begins talking to me, “So, what did the doctor say and what did they figure out?”

  “I talked to Dr. Morris who told me I need to talk to a Psychologist. Then, she had Dr. Duke come in here who asked me some questions. Once I finished talking to Dr. Duke, she found out I’m suffering from depression, which is an actual sickness. She wants me to go home and talk to a Psychologist. She’s going to call and set up an appointment.” I tell him.

  “So cutting is actually you suffering from depression? Is there something they can do for you?” He asks concerned.

  “Yes, cutting is my way of dealing with my depression and Dr. Duke says there are ways of treating it without having to lock me up in a padded room.”

  “So, they can help you with this. That’s good.”

  A few minutes after Landon and I are done discussing the future plans the doctors has for me, Casey and the nurse walk into the room.

  “Ms. Brown, we’re working on your discharge orders now. Doctor Duke’s on the phone with a Psychologist from your hometown. She’s going to fax the paper work we have here for them to review and make an appointment. Once that’s complete, we’ll work on discharging you so you can go home.” she states.

  “What are her instructions for when we go home? She’s obviously suicidal.” My mom asks.

  “Let me get Dr. Duke and she can explain her plans to you when she’s done on the phone.” The nurse says as she leaves.

  That’s the best I’ve ever seen anyone avoid my mother’s craziness. I think it’s funny. Instead of locking me up, the doctors seem to understand why I am the way I am.

  We wait for another hour before anyone comes back into the room. Dr. Duke is the next doctor that comes back in. This is one reason why I hate going to the emergency room. It always takes the doctors hours to complete a job and release their patients back into the real world.

  “Amber, I talked to a Psychologist in West Virginia. I managed to set you up an appointment with them and gave them a small review of what we talked about. Here’s your card to remind you of your appointment. Now, seeing how these are not normal circumstances, we’re releasing you to your parents. In any other case, you would be moved to the psychiatry ward of the hospital for observation.” She states, which baffles me.

  “Once you all get back to West Virginia, you’ll be meeting up with Dr. McKinley. She’s a great doctor who will help you. She’s very well known within the world of medicine. She has extensive experience in the practice of Psychiatry and she’s known to provide the highest quality care to her patients. I’m very comfortable to release you into her care.” Dr. Duke says with a slight smile.

  “Okay.” I reply not sure what else I should say.

  “As for your instructions for the wound: you need to keep it dry and clean. The stitches will fall away on their own. There’s no need to go and have them removed. Clean it with warm water and an antibacterial soap. Pat it dry and keep it covered. Do not immerse your hand into any dirty water, such as a pan of dish water. That can lead to a nasty infection. Do you work?” She asks.

  “Yes, I do. I was going to ask if I could have a doctor’s note and a release stating I can work.”

  “Well, I think it’d be best, if possible, if you took time away from working. Sometimes work can add to the stress and make the depression worse. I think it’s best if you focus on getting yourself into a better place so nothing like this happens again.” She suggests.

  “I can’t just ask for more time off. I...” I begin to say before my mother interrupts me.

  “Then, it looks like you’ll need to call them and tell them you quit. There are plenty more dead-end jobs out there you can get when you’re well.” She snaps.

  “Mom, please, I can’t take it anymore. Your negative comments and tone is really getting under my skin. So, please do me the favor, and just shut up.” I flip.

  I know she’s saying that it’d be best for me to just quit, which I plan on doing, but she doesn’t need to jump in like she knows everything.

  “Ok, well I think everything here is good. I need you to sign these release forms and you can go.” Dr. Duke says, handing me some papers.

  The only thing I can think of is going home. This is the best news I’ve heard of all night.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Landon drives me to the hotel while my mother and Dave follow us. I can imagine what all Mom and Dave are talking about in the car. There isn’t much talking in mine. Landon’s still upset. I can’t tell what Patrick and Casey are thinking. So, I decide to find out.

  “Did anyone call Donna and tell her about what happened?” I ask them.

  “I did,” Landon answers. “She told me to call her when you got back to the hotel, because she and Allen want to come by. But what’s going on? Are we staying for tomorrow or is April making us go home?”

  “As usual, she’s only thinking of herself. She told me we’re coming back with her. I don’t think she’s thinking right. I don’t know what the hell is going on in her damn head.” I say.

  “I thought you and your mom were getting along and your relationship was better?” Casey adds.

  “I thought so to, but apparently it’s really not. I mean, I thought the move really changed her, but she’s acting like this has nothing to do with her. She’s acting like I’m making all of this up. But it’s not really surprising. I don’t know how I’m going to live with her and Dave again.” I say, shaking my head.

  “Well…let’s get ready for hell.” Patrick says as we pull into the hotel parking lot.

  “Agreed.” I reply.

  When I get out of the car, Dave comes up and tells us there’s a new riding arrangement for the way home. He said Casey and I have to ride back with him and my mom. I guess he and my mother feel the guys are having a bad impact on us.

  “I think it’ll be easier when we get back. The guys can go to their apartment and we can drop Casey at home. Then, Amber can easily ride home with us.” Dave suggests.

  “But are you forgetting something, Dave?” I ask.

  “No, I’m not.”

  “Let me remind you; see that car there... the one with the word Focus on the side... well that’s my car. You know that little piece of paper that says who owns the car? Yeah, it’s called the title. It has my name on it, and no one is driving it when I’m not in it. So, I’ll be riding in my car. Oh, and seeing how Casey’s my friend and sure in the hell isn’t yours, she’ll be joining me.” I tell him.

  There’s no way I am riding back with them. I’m not going to listen to how much I messed up and have Casey witness it. I think I put her and the guys through enough. After I say that, I walk into the hotel room. I didn’t realize what time it is. They really wanted us to leave and drive home when it’s one in the morning. I’m not going anywhere. I want to sleep and I paid for the hotel for the night. So, I am going to use it.

  “Get your stuff together and get it into the car.” My mom says when she walks in.

  “Actually, like it really matters to you, I’m tired. I had one hell of a day. I saw my best friend lying in a casket and woke up to pain while lying in a hospital bed. Now the only thing I can think of is sleeping. That’s exactly what I’m going to do. I can also guess by looking at those three,
they are tired too.” I ramble, as I motion to my friends.

  “Excuse me? Who do you think you are talking to? I am your mother, and I say we’re leaving. The trick you pulled today was stupid and obviously you need someone to look after you constantly. So, I’m not having you commit suicide on my watch. Therefore, you will be leaving with me and Dave.” she interjects.

  Dave adds. “Not to mention that the hospital released you into your mothers care. So, if you want to give problems, I will call them and tell them that you’re not listening to us. I’ll tell them, I feel you’re being a danger to yourself.”

  We look up and see Donna standing in the door way. “I think you will do no such thing, Dave. Amber’s right. She has been through enough. Rest is what she needs, and I don’t blame her for wanting to take care of herself. She wants to make sure she’s rested before getting into a car for hours at a time.”

  “What are you doing here?” Dave asks her.

  “I’m doing what you’re not. I’m here to support Amber when she needs it most. I would love the chance to be able to take Sarah into my arms and help her through her problems.” Donna lectures.

  “Thank you Donna. At least someone sees what I’m saying.” I reply.

  “Like you know what you’re talking about, Donna, your daughter’s dead. Leave me to mine while I have her.” Dave calls to her from his chair.

  “Like you have room to talk, Dave, you aren’t Amber’s father. As a matter of fact, I know who he is, and he is. So, if you want to throw stabs, why don’t you just get the hell out of here, and let me take care of my worries. Obviously, your worries aren’t the same as mine.” Donna says.

  My mom cuts in. “Would you people just stop? I can’t believe this. Donna is here to help and I can’t believe you would say something like that to her.”

  “Oh, so now we are siding with her. What’s next? Let me guess, Alex right? What about him?” Dave yells.

  “He has nothing to do with this, and you know it. I think you need to keep your mouth shut and go out to the damn car.” My mom pleads.

  “Actually, that’s just what I’ll do. But when you get out there, I won’t be there. April, I’m done. I’m done trying. I can’t live in his shadow any longer. I can’t help you continue to live your lie.” Dave sputters.

  I wish he would have just stopped, because this is when my life really comes crashing down around me.

  “Dave, leave before you say something you’ll regret.” Donna commands and motions towards the door.

  “Oh, are you afraid I might say the truth? You know that Amber’s father actually lives within a few blocks of her and she’s seen him? Or worse, even spent the night there? Or how about the fact that Amber’s best friends with her half sister?” Dave announces and I notice my mom crying.

  The room’s completely silent. I don’t know what to do. I don’t think I heard him right at first. Casey stands up looking at Dave, “What in the hell are you talking about?” She yells in confusion.

  “Oh, guessing your daddy didn’t tell you about his past…did he?” Dave asks.

  “You don’t know my father. Stop talking about him.” Casey warns.

  “Does everyone enjoy living a lie?” Dave asks, looking at my mom.

  What in the hell got into him? One minute he seems to be a control freak, wanting to control every aspect of my life since we left the hospital. Now, it seems like he’s the freak without a sense of control.

  “It’s true,” Donna admits. “Alex Malone is your biological father, Amber. He’s lived here for a few years. When your mother found out she was pregnant, she also found out about your father being unfaithful by getting another woman pregnant.”

  “How do you know all of this?” I ask Donna.

  “Your father used to come around to see you after you were born when I was babysitting you at my house. That’s why you may see him in some of those scrapbooks.”

  Thinking back and remembering, I thought I saw Alex in some of the pictures. She has to be telling me the truth. This means Casey and I, are sisters.

  “That means Casey’s not only my friend, but my sister too?” I ask.

  “That’s exactly what it means.” My mom jumps in with shame spread across her face.

  “It’s not true. It can’t be. My family and I have always lived in West Virginia.” Casey states picking up her phone.

  Right away I know what she’s doing. She’s calling Alex to see if what they say is true. I can’t believe it. I don’t know what to think. First Sarah, and then everyone finds out about my secret. Now, I officially learn my best friend’s my sister. What else in my life is going to fall apart? Is my mother going to tell me I have a gay brother who’s adopted? Not that I have anything against gay guys.

  Landon and Patrick sit quietly on the bed, not saying a word. I join them as I cuddle with Landon. This is too much. After Dave finishes rambling on about Casey’s dad, he storms out of the hotel and takes off, leaving my mom with us. So much for being in love.

  Donna and Mom sit down at the table while they talk to Casey who’s on the phone with Alex. I don’t care, because at this moment all I want to do was sleep. I’m emotionally and physically exhausted.

  While listening to the conversation and Landon’s heartbeat; that’s exactly what I do, sleep for the first time in days without any dreams.

  Chapter Sixteen

  The sun shinning through the curtain, warming my face wakes me, and I see my mom on the floor sleeping. I remember what happened last night. I can see Dave truly left her here. This sucks. Within one night I went from disliking my life to hating my life.

  I go to the bathroom to brush my teeth and comb my hair. When I reach the bathroom, I notice a red stain on the tiled floor. I bring my arm up gently, hold my wrist.

  “Amber, what’re you doing?” I hear Patrick ask from around the corner.

  “Nothing just brushing my teeth and my hair.” I reply as I turn around.

  Guess I should get used to this. It’s my fault. If I didn’t give everyone a reason to worry, they wouldn’t be watching my every move. They are just following the doctor’s orders.

  “Okay, just making sure you’re all right.” He says and turns back into the other room.

  After I’m done dressing and getting ready for the day, I wake everyone up. Landon and Casey aren’t hard to wake. My mom asks Patrick and Landon to go down the street to get coffee. Normally, she would’ve asked me.

  “I think we should get everything gathered up while they get the coffee.” My mom suggests.

  “Landon, grab us one too.” I ask him.

  “All right.” He replies walking out the door.

  “Do you think he’ll be at the house when we get there, Mom?” I ask, referring to Dave.

  “Probably not, he and I have had a rocky relationship for a long time. We did a great job of hiding it.” She says in a saddened voice. “Casey….Amber… I’m sorry you two found out the way you did. I didn’t want you to find out like this, but its better you know.” She finishes.

  I don’t understand how I feel. For the past year, I looked at Casey as my best friend. There are times when I thought she was my sister. I even thought about it when Mom told me my father’s first name. Now I understand why she didn’t want to talk about him or tell me his last name.

  “It’s ok. I’m glad I finally know the truth. I don’t know how he’s going to take it, but I really need to talk with him.” I say, hoping Casey won’t object.

  “No kidding! He’s got some explaining to do. He told me he has another daughter, but never said he walked out on her. He told me her mother wouldn’t let him see her.” Casey admits.

  “It’s true. I wouldn’t let him see Amber. He wanted nothing to do with her while I was pregnant. He didn’t think twice when he walked out. After I gave birth to her, he wanted to see her. He fought with me, wanting to give her his last name. I told him, no. He wasn’t there for me when I was pregnant with you. He sure the hell wasn’t going to
take credit when all the pain and fear was gone.” My mother says defensively.

  “Well, I already talked to dad about it. He wants to be part of your life. At this point, I’m not sure how to deal with this. I know I want to focus on you getting better. I don’t want another scare again. So, let’s get packed up and go home. This way you can get the help you need.” Casey says hugging me.

  Wow! I thought she was going to hate me and my mom. Last night, I didn’t want to think of facing Casey with this. I’m glad she did the exact opposite.

  It didn’t take long for the guys to come back. In between sipping on our coffees, we pack up our stuff, return the key to the room, and check out. We’re on the road heading back home before lunch.

  ****

  The drive back isn’t nearly as long as the ride down. But, that’s how it goes. Most of the time we remain quiet so there isn’t much conversation. I can’t get my mind off of everything that’s happened in the past few days. How much is one person supposed to take? People wonder why I’ve turned to cutting isn’t it obvious? I’m surprised I haven’t lost my mind.

  As we pull into the drive, I notice Dave’s car isn’t there, so my mom is right. Hopefully, I won’t have to deal with him anytime soon. I’ve got enough to worry about. After the car is unloaded, my mom makes dinner while the rest of us hang in the living room. It seems weird that no one wants to say anything.

  The week leading up to my first visit with the doctor is rather uneventful. Mom watches every move I make. Dave still hasn’t come back and I’m thankful. Casey and I agree we’d take care of my cutting before working on our relationship, and my relationship with Alex. This still stresses me out because I want to face him. I have so many questions for him, and I’m not patient.

  I call my boss and tell him of my “mental” state and that I can no longer work. It’s not like I did much for the company anyways. I haven’t worked a day since I was hired.