Heat rushes straight to my core. There's something perfect about this. I want him staring at me, thinking about me, lusting after me.
"Touch your nipples," he says.
His gaze sends another shiver down my spine. I rub my thumb over my nipple. Wow. It's like it's his thumb. It's like he's the one touching me.
Flutters build inside me. I'm hot all over. I do it again, my eyes still on his. But his expression is so intense. I have to look away.
"Eyes on mine," he barks.
I bring my gaze back to his. Another shudder rushes through me. My breath hitches. My heart races. My whole body buzzes. I run my fingers over my nipples the way he does. My eyes want to close, so I can really soak in the sensation, but I force them open.
His tongue slides over his lips. He motions come here. I take three steps towards him, until we're close enough to touch.
Blake grabs my hips. He pulls my body into his, crotches first. He's hard. His hands slide over my shoulders and down my sides. He glides them back up my sides and over my breasts. I gasp as he plays with my nipple. It's much better than my hand. So much better.
I fight to keep my eyes open, to keep them on his. His expression sends another shiver down my spine. Heat rushes through my body. Every brush of his fingertips stokes the fire inside me.
Tension builds in my sex. I need him already. I need him desperately. I rub my crotch against his, soaking in the feel of his erection against me. He's hard because of me. He wants me. Needs me.
Blake brings his hand down on my ass. Another spanking. It stings, even through my jeans. I yelp and dig my nails into his wool suit jacket.
He presses my body into his. "Not until I give you permission."
I nod.
"Turn towards the mirror."
I do. My neck presses against his face. He brushes his lips against it. Then it's teeth. Hard. Pain bursts through me, calling all of my attention. I grab at his suit jacket again.
Smack! His hand comes down on my ass. Harder than last time. I feel the sting everywhere.
"Not until I give you permission." He sinks his teeth into my neck, testing me. "Hands at your sides.
I tug at the sides of my jeans. Anything to keep my body cooperating. Blake bites my neck, my ears, my collarbone. It's the perfect bit of ecstasy. I feel the ache everywhere.
Conscious thought is long gone. He's all I know, all I want, all I feel. I close my eyes and soak in the sensation. He bites and sucks and kisses my neck.
I let out a low groan. He tugs at my hair, pulling my head back and biting me again and again. My hands shake. They want so badly to touch him. I want so badly to touch him.
But I have to wait.
He brings his mouth to my nipples and sucks hard. It's so warm and wet I can barely stand it. Ecstasy builds inside me. My sex pulses. I'm desperate for a proper release.
He bites me. Another sharp pain. I feel it everywhere, even my fingers and toes. My hands reach for his hair, but I stop myself. Hands at my sides. Those are the rules.
Blake moves to my other nipple. He sucks and bites and licks. Pleasure and pain whirs around inside me. It's so much sensation my legs go weak. There's nothing to hold onto.
"Unzip your jeans." He steps back to watch.
My body goes cold. It's like it's screaming for him to stay closer. Right now, Blake is the only thing I need.
But I have to play by his rules. I let out a shaky breath and do as I'm told.
His eyes find mine. "Touch yourself."
I push my jeans to my knees. Then my underwear. My breath catches. I'm as good as naked. Blake's pupils dilate. He's as aroused as I am even if he is totally in control.
My fingertips trail beneath my bellybutton. Almost. I skim my clit lightly. A shiver runs through me. I want so badly to come, but I want it from Blake.
"No teasing, Kat." His voice is low. "Touch yourself properly."
My sex clenches. I hold his gaze as I rub myself. Pleasure builds inside me. My cheeks flush red. I'm masturbating for him in a public bathroom, and I'm fucking enjoying it. What the hell has happened to my life?
"You want to come, Kat?" he asks.
"Yes," I barely breathe it. My finger circles my clit. I'm throbbing. Desperate.
"You want to touch me?"
God yes. I nod. "Yes."
"Come here."
I take a step towards him. Close enough to touch again.
"Closer."
I press my body against his. He drags his fingers over my hips, my stomach, my breasts. He pinches my nipples so hard I gasp. His eyes stay on mine. His gaze is so intense. I can't look away.
He presses his lips to mine. Aggressive. Commanding. His tongue explores my mouth.
Heat rushes through my body. Everywhere feels so good. He pinches my nipples again and pain bursts through me. More, I need more. I need him like this always. All the time.
He pulls back, his lips hovering over my ears. "On your knees."
Hell yes. I slide to my knees, holding onto his hips to stay upright.
Blake looks down at me. He undoes his belt. Unzips his slacks.
My tongue slides over my lips. Almost. I have to be patient now.
"Kat, look at me."
I do.
"You want to come?"
"Yes."
"You want to suck my cock?"
"Yes."
"Touch yourself." He slides his hand into my hair, holding me steady.
I bring one hand between my legs. No holding back now. I rub my clit harder and faster. Pleasure builds inside me. Almost. So damn close.
With his free hand, Blake pushes his slacks to his knees. Then the boxers. They strain over his cock.
Want floods my body. Almost. I slide my finger inside my sex. A gasp escapes my lips. It's the next best thing to him.
He digs into my hair, bringing me closer. I brush my lips against his cock. He tastes good, clean and distinctly like Blake. I dig my hand into his hip to stay upright, but he pushes it away.
"Rub your nipples," he commands.
I press my knees into the floor. Nothing to hold onto. No way to stay upright. I slide two fingers into my sex. Deeper. Deeper. I rub my nipples with my other hand.
My body floods with pleasure. Almost. But all I want is him in my mouth. All I want is to feel him coming.
Blake digs both hands into my hair, holding my head in place. I run my tongue over the head of his cock. His skin feels and tastes so damn good. I need all of it. All of him.
I take him into my mouth and suck on his tip. He groans and digs his hands into my hair. He holds my head steady as he thrusts into my mouth. It starts slow. He moves faster. Deeper. I press my tongue flat over the bottom of his cock, sucking on him as he fucks my mouth.
Blake groans. I slide my fingers deeper inside me in a desperate attempt to match his pace. I pinch my nipples the way he did. I'm filled everywhere. Pleasure whirs around inside me. There's so much sensation I can barely take it.
He fucks my mouth. Harder. Deeper. I relax my throat, fighting my gag reflex. I need to take him as deep as he'll go.
He tugs at my hair. His breath is heavy. Desperate. "Come for me, Kat," he groans.
I surrender to the sensations, matching his rhythm with my fingers. Harder, deeper, faster. Pleasure pools inside me. It builds with every one of his groans. Almost. It's so much I can barely take it. He's so much, so big, I can barely take him.
He tugs at my hair. Harder. Harder. The burst of pain pushes me to the brink. So damn close. My body is on fire. Everything is too much. Too much pleasure, too much pain, too much to take. Finally, I understand that idea. More is more.
And God do I need more.
I move faster. I suck harder on him. I pinch my nipple until I'm groaning. An orgasm rises up inside me. It's so tight, so hard, so damn good.
The pressure grows and grows and grows. He fucks my mouth. Faster. Deeper. Bliss overtakes me. So damn close. One more brush of my fingers and I'm there.
He moves faster and faster. I grab onto his hips to stay upright. He nods as if to give me permission.
I bring one hand to his cock and stroke him like it’s an extension of my mouth. My tongue slides over his tip. He tastes damn good. He made me feel so damn good. I have to do the same. I have to feel him come.
Blake groans. His eyelids press together. His nails scrape against my neck. With his other hand, he tugs at my hair. Harder. Harder. Harder. I fight my urge to scream. It's more than a hint of pain, but it's perfect. That's how good he feels. That's how much he wants me.
He holds me in place as he fucks my mouth. I do everything I can to take him deeper. His groans get louder. Louder.
He moves faster. I suck harder and harder until he's shaking.
"Fuck," he groans.
He launches into a final thrust as an orgasm overtakes him. He holds my head tightly as he comes in my mouth. I wait until he's finished and swallow hard.
Blake releases his grip. I fall to my hands and knees, catching my breath. My heart is still racing. My body is still keyed up.
He offers his hands. I take them and he pulls me to my feet. Blake pulls my underwear and jeans back into position. He zips and buttons me. His fingertips skim my hips, sides, chest, neck.
I meet his gaze. Still topless, but that's not why I feel exposed. My cheeks flush. My attention turns to the floor.
He runs a hand through my hair, the same sweet touch from before. "You okay?"
I nod.
He adjusts his pants then kneels, collects my clothes, and dresses me. He does it slowly and carefully.
His eyes find mine. "Ready to go home?"
I nod. This relationship might crush my heart, but my body demands more. It demands all of Blake, all the time.
It's the only way I can have him.
***
We have our dessert on Blake's couch. Of course, he worked everything out so sticky rice and mango was waiting for us in his apartment. The man can pull strings I can't even fathom.
I flip around the channel. I settle on a Grey's Anatomy rerun, and he watches with a sort of fascination.
"What the hell is this?" he asks.
"It's an amazing soap opera where all the doctors and nurses are sleeping together. I used to watch it with Lizzy." Before I was too busy to commit to our weekly viewing party.
"Why?"
"It's TV. It's fun. Don't you ever watch TV just to zone out?"
He stares at me like I'm crazy.
"No, of course you don't. You have three spare hours a week and you spend them all, what—playing chess?"
He scoops sticky rice with his spoon and slides it into my mouth. Sweet, creamy, hint of coconut. And, yes, damn sticky. Last time he was...
Oh lord. I dig my nails into my thighs so I won't react. We're having a proper conversation. No time for dirty thoughts.
I lick the spoon clean. Blake raises an eyebrow as if to say hmm, you really like that sticky rice. I roll my eyes and flip him off.
He smiles. My heart goes atwitter. Fine. I get off on his smile. I can accept that. Doesn't mean we're serious. Just a little nerves over a perfect, adorable smile. Not like it's waking up every nerve in my body. Not like the only thing I want to do is make Blake smile again.
Not at all.
"And you make time for this show?" he asks.
"Not this show in particular. But it's important to relax." I eat mango with my hands. The juice runs down my fingers. Another sticky mess.
Blake takes my hand and runs his tongue over it, lapping up every bit of juice. His eyes connect with mine. "You don't relax unless I force you to."
"I went to brunch with my sister." And spent the entire time stressed over that damn check. "It was very relaxing."
He stares at me like he doesn't believe me. "Take your own advice, Kat. What do you ever do that's just for you?"
"I don't know."
"You deserve to treat yourself." He runs his finger up my neck. "You deserve everything the world has to offer."
He looks at me like he's promising me the world, but the world holds no particular appeal. This is what I want. Him looking at me like I'm the fucking world, like I'm the thing he wants to explore.
Warmth rushes around inside me, collecting in my belly. It's not the racing heat of what happened in the bathroom. It's not about touching him, at least not about touching him like that.
I clear my throat. "And what are you offering? Anything better than the world?"
His lips curl into a smile and then—thank God I'm sitting, because my knees go weak—he laughs. A belly laugh. A perfect laugh. His eyes light up and that little dimple appears on his check.
Warm. I'm warm everything.
He brushes a hair from my eyes, that same sweet gesture I've come to know so well.
His breath warm on my ear, he leans closer. "Much better than the world."
"And what's that."
He nods to a box tucked away on the bookshelf. Chess. "The chance for victory."
"Yeah?"
"Unless you're afraid of a challenge."
You mean like surviving the next few months with Blake without falling to pieces? Certainly not afraid of that challenge. Not at all. Not even a little bit.
"Never," I say.
He sets the game up on the coffee table. We play a dozen times. Same handicap for Blake—no queen. I manage to win a few times. But the truth is, my mind isn't on the strategy.
It's on him. His fingers gliding over the pieces, over his chin as he thinks. The cute look of frustration when he loses a piece. The way his eyes get big and bright. A new idea, something to excite him.
His smile.
That dimple on his cheek.
His laugh.
His perfect laugh.
My heart races. All this nervous energy over a board game. It's not like me at all. I hold my own with people yelling in my face, with six tables who all need me at once, with no way to pay next month's bills.
I hold my own.
"I should really get to bed." I yawn dramatically to sell my story.
Blake presses his lips into mine. "I'll go with you."
My heart does a backflip. We've had plenty of sex, but he's never wanted to actually sleep with me. Never.
I brush my teeth and change into a pair of pajamas from the dresser. My size, my style. Must have been bought by Ashleigh.
He pulls me onto his bed. His lips brush over mine. It's softer and sweeter than any of our previous kisses. He spoons me for a long time. Every part of me feels warm and safe.
Everything is perfect.
Except for one little thing.
This is all a lie.
***
I wake up cold. No arms around me. No one else in the bed. The apartment is so quiet. There can't be anyone else here at all.
There's a note on the counter:
Went into work early. Will be home by 8 P.M. if you want to stick around. If not, take a cab and use my credit card. I insist.
Help yourself to anything.
- Blake
Home by eight. Nice and early. A solid twelve hours away. I dig around the kitchen. There's coffee, tea, cereal, milk. That's about it. There's plenty to do in this area of town. Hell, I could spend the whole day in the park. I could spend half of it at the Met.
But I'm not rearranging my day around Blake. As nice as his place is, as much as I want to wander around Central Park, I'm not staying here. I don't even have a key. I can't even let myself back in. What kind of guy doesn't leave his fiancée a key to his place? A fake fiancée, but still. He's usually so obsessed with keeping up the ruse.
I fix myself cereal and coffee and sit on the balcony. Warmer today, but there's still a chill. I wrap myself in a blanket and doodle the view in every direction. I'll miss this apartment.
I'll miss Blake mor
e.
I try to shut out the thought, but it holds strong in my mind. Maybe it's not the end of the world, me missing him. Employees miss their bosses. Fuck buddies miss each other. It doesn't have to be more than that.
It doesn't have to be anything like love.
Chapter Nineteen
Come eight P.M., Blake texts me.
Blake: Damn. You’re not here. There goes hope you greet me naked.
My breath catches in my throat. That's how he wants me. Sitting around his apartment waiting then ready the second he's home. What a God damn cliché of a wife to be.
Of course, I wouldn't exactly mind greeting him naked. I certainly wouldn't mind him throwing me on the couch and fucking me senseless.
I shake my head. Senseless is right. I'm already losing my damn sense. The guy is driving me in circles. We have a deal. It's business. I need to keep it business.
No more feelings. Period.
Kat: Maybe if you had offered to greet me naked. Now, that I would like to see.
Blake: Come over and your wish will be fulfilled
Kat: Can't. I have to work on my portfolio. Columbia application is due next week.
Blake: Shame.
My fingers hover over the phone screen. It's a half-truth. The application is due next week, but the portfolio isn't due for another month. I can't be around Blake. It makes me feel funny and restless, warm and cold all at the same time.
The test of the week goes the same. He invites me over or offers to meet somewhere to fuck me. Never in such base terms, but his intentions are obvious.
I dodge with excuses of work. Come Friday night at ten, he's not buying it.
Blake: You're not working all weekend, Kat. Don't bullshit me.
Kat: I have plans with Lizzy.
Blake: I'll send a limo. With me in it.
Kat: Tempting, but I really do need to work.
Blake: We have dinner reservations next Saturday. In midtown at 6:00. Bring Lizzy.
Kat: Ever hear of asking?
Blake: Will you allow me to make you come in my limo? I have champagne.
Kat: Do we have to talk?
Blake: Not a word.
Kat: I'll be ready in fifteen.
Blake: I'll be there in twenty. Don't wear anything under your coat.
The Billionaire's Deal: The Complete Story: An Alpha Billionaire Romance Page 18
