by Amy Cross
“For God's sake,” she said finally, “listen to us. A woman is dead, her body is right in front of us, and a little girl is in the clutches of someone truly evil. And what are we talking about? A man.”
“He's more than just a man,” Estella replied.
“I don't care anymore. Everything else can go to hell, I just care about finding Anna and making sure she's okay. I know that in the future she...”
“She what?” Estella asked.
Kate paused, thinking back to the old woman she'd met on her first day. At that time, Anna Kazakos had seemed like an irascible old woman, yet now Kate knew there must have been more to her. Still, Anna was another part of the puzzle that didn't seem to fit together. Why, she wondered, had 'old' Anna not seemed to recognize her? And why had Ephram apparently never heard the story about Jennifer's life and death, and the time-traveling woman who'd come into his family's life a century earlier? She felt yet again as if she was seeing only half of the picture, and the sensation was infuriating.
“I know how to cheer us up,” Estella said suddenly, forcing a smile. “Shall we go upstairs and look at the table layout for the wedding?”
“Are you serious?” Kate asked.
“It's the perfect tonic for being down in the dumps,” Estella continued, hurrying around the table and grabbing Kate's hand, before trying to pull her toward the door. “Come on, we'll have a smile on your face in no time. I've been going absolutely bonkers trying to seat people properly, and there are still a few tables that concern me.”
Kate shook her head.
“Trust me,” Estella added, pulling harder on her hand. “It'll be such fun, and then we can talk about flower arrangements! What do you think about orchids?”
“A woman is dead!” Kate pointed out. “Let go of my hand! I just want to sit here for a while!”
“Nonsense,” Estella continued, pulling even harder. “I'll cheer you up! I'll -”
“Just go away!” Kate shouted finally, slipping her hand loose. She was angry, furious even, and Estella's eternal chirpiness just seemed to be making things a thousand times worse. “Go away,” she said again, with a sigh. “You don't understand. Enjoy planning your wedding, if that's really the most important thing in the world for you right now. Just don't bother me with it, because right now I don't give a damn.”
“But...” Estella paused, with a crestfallen look on her face. “I just want to cheer you up, Kate. I mean, that's what friends do for each other, isn't it?”
“We're not friends,” Kate whispered.
“I beg your pardon?”
“I said, we're not friends.” Pausing, Kate turned to her. “Jennifer was my friend. A woman named Annie, a hundred years from now, is my friend. A man named Ephram, he's my friend. But you?” She shook her head.
Silence fell for a moment.
“Why not?” Estella asked, with tears in her eyes.
“Because of what you did to me!”
“What did I do to you? I haven't done anything to you!”
“In the future,” Kate continued, aware that she was being cruel but unable to hold back. “Trust me, Estella, I might not be able to fill you in on all the details, but I've seen another side to your sickly sweet demeanor and I know what you're capable of. For all I know, two good friends of mine in the future are dead because of you, so I'm sorry, but I don't feel like going over your goddamn wedding plans, not when so many other people are suffering.”
Taking a step back, Estella seemed genuinely shocked.
“I tried to help,” she whimpered finally. “Kate, really...”
“It's not your fault,” Kate continued. “It's mine. So I'm the one who's going to put it straight. I don't know how, not yet, but I'll find a way.”
Estella opened her mouth, as if she was going to say something else, but finally she turned and fled from the room.
“Wait!” Kate called after her, getting to her feet and hurrying to the door. “Estella, I'm sorry! I shouldn't have said some of those things!” She waited, but all she heard was Estella running up the stairs. “We are friends!” she shouted. “Estella? Did you hear me? I was just angry, I was lashing out!” She waited again, but a moment later she realized it was too late. “Damn it,” she muttered, turning and heading back to Jennifer's body.
She paused for a moment, feeling as if the whole world was crashing down onto her shoulders.
“I'm going to find Anna,” she said finally. “I swear to God, that little girl is the only good person in all of this, and I'm going to find her and bring her back to Thaxos, even if it's the last thing I ever do.”
II
“Welcome, Anna,” Ms. Eversham said as she opened the carriage's door and took a step back. “Welcome to Raven's Briar Orphanage, your new home.”
Staying stock still, Anna stared out at the dark building and felt dread starting to twist harder and harder in the pit of her stomach. Although it was midnight and driving rain was falling, she could see a huge stone house, bigger than any house she'd ever seen before. In fact, the main building seemed almost to be as big as the whole town of Thaxos. In the distance, a flash of lightning lit the sky, followed a moment later by a clap of thunder. The whole scene felt like something from a nightmare.
At the front of the carriage, the two horses whinnied in the rain.
“There's no need to be frightened,” Ms. Eversham continued, reaching a thin, spindly hand into the carriage and beckoning Anna to climb out. “We take care of lots and lots of little girls here. Hundreds.”
“I want to go home!” Anna replied, trying desperately not to cry. “I want to go back to Thaxos!”
“But why, dear? There's no-one there for you.”
“My mother's there!”
“Your mother is dead, Anna.”
“No!” Anna shouted.
“It's true,” Mrs. Eversham continued. “I'm afraid she was found to have done some very, very bad things, and as a result she was put to the noose. It's unfortunate, but you can learn from her experience, Anna, you really can. Just because your mother was wicked, that doesn't mean there's no hope for you.”
“I want to go back to her,” Anna whimpered, wiping tears from her cheek in the hope that the woman wouldn't notice they'd been there. “You're lying. She's waiting for me, I know she is.”
“No, dear,” Mrs. Eversham replied, with her hand still reaching out to Anna, almost close enough to touch the girl's trembling knee. “Now, I'm not saying that it'll be easy for you to overcome the enormous sins your mother committed. She was a terrible woman and she cruelly murdered two innocent people, but through a combination of hard work and physical repentance, there is still hope for your soul. We can help with those things, Anna. At Raven's Briar, we have a great deal of experience when it comes to fixing wayward girls.”
“I want to go home,” Anna cried, shrinking back even further into the corner of the seat. “I don't want to go to an orphanage!”
“Now that's a very hurtful thing for you to say,” Mrs. Eversham continued. “I've gone to great lengths to make Raven's Briar a welcoming home for lost little girls, and I also traveled far to fetch you. Don't you think you could at least give me the benefit of the doubt and come inside, to see for yourself? You don't want to hurt my feelings, do you? After all, I've shown you nothing but the greatest kindness.”
“I want to go home,” Anna whispered again, closing her eyes and hoping against hope that somehow the nightmare would end. Reaching up, she started pinching her arm as hard as possible, until she could bear it no longer and had to let go. “Please, I want to go home, just let me go -”
Suddenly she heard the carriage door being slammed shut. Opening her eyes, she found that she was all alone, barely able to see anything in the darkness and with only the sound of rain pounding against the roof of the carriage.
“Come out when you're ready, Anna,” Ms. Eversham called out from the other side of the door. “I'll be waiting.”
***
A short while later, the catch on the carriage door began to turn, and finally the door swung open, revealing Anna's terrified face staring out from the darkness.
A few meters away, Ms. Eversham was sitting on a bench, apparently oblivious to the driving rain that was pounding every surface.
“Am I to take it,” she asked with a faint, arch smile, “that you have now decided to be a sensible young lady and come with me?”
Trembling with fear, Anna stared at the woman for a moment, before looking back into the dark carriage. Finally, realizing that she had no choice, she scooched to the edge of the door and then dangled her legs out, before dropping down into the mud. Rain soaked her almost immediately, and she struggled to get through the mud as she made her way toward the bench. She had no suitcase with her, no possessions; just the dress she'd put on the previous day when she was getting ready to go to school.
“Now who wants to be outside on a night like this,” Ms. Eversham asked, “when they could be inside? You're hungry, are you not? I'm sure I heard your stomach rumbling on the ride from Parios. Come inside with me, and we'll set you up with a hearty meal.”
Still terrified, Anna eyed the woman cautiously, paying particular attention to her scars. On either side of Ms. Eversham's mouth, there was a thick scar running up to the edge of her eye, creating a large V pattern. The scar tissue seemed swollen and knotted, as if many years ago it had been left to heal with little, if any, medical assistance.
“I imagine you're used to some rather simple food on Thaxos,” Ms. Eversham continued. “You'll find that here at Raven's Briar, we go out of our way to offer a more varied and interesting menu. It's my personal belief that good, healthy food is vitally important when it comes to promoting a young lady's growth.”
“I...” Anna paused. “I like porridge.”
“Of course you do. But we don't serve porridge here.”
“I -”
“You'll develop an adult palate while you're with us.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means you'll learn to be a proper lady.”
Anna swallowed hard. More than anything in the world, she wanted to be back home in the kitchen at the back of the store, with her mother placing a bowl of steaming porridge on the table. Having long felt an urge to travel the world, she now realized that home wasn't such a bad place after all.
“Come,” Mrs. Eversham continued, getting to her feet and reaching a hand out toward Anna. “This rain is getting rather annoying, don't you think?”
Anna stared at the hand for a moment, before reluctantly taking it and stepping forward.
“I still want to go home,” she whimpered, as pouring rain washed fresh tears from her cheeks. “I don't want to be here at all.”
“We all have to be places we don't want to be sometimes,” Ms. Eversham replied, leading Anna along the twisting, broken stone path that led toward the main door. “That's part of growing up, though. We have to learn to make the best of our situation and push ahead with all the positives we can find.” Ahead, the door creaked open, revealing a tall, well-built man with a buzz-cut and granite features, who seemed to have been expecting them. “You want to grow up, don't you?”
Stopping, Anna stared in horror at the man in the doorway.
“That's just Constant,” Ms. Eversham said with a smile. “He's the handyman around here. Don't worry, you'll get used to him, he's not as terrifying as he looks. He's not dangerous, either. Not since the doctors removed the part of his brain that caused him to...” She paused. “Well, that's all over now. He's really quite docile and kind these days, although I should probably warn you that he absolutely loves showing his scar to people.”
As if on cue, Constant smiled a blank, almost childish smile.
“I want to go home,” Anna replied, shivering as she felt rainwater soaking through her clothes. “I want to go back to Thaxos.”
“Thaxos is in your past now. You won't ever be going back there.”
“But I -”
“I know, you want to.” Crouching in front of her, with rain still pouring down all around them and battering every surface, Ms. Eversham smiled, causing her V-shaped scar to twitch. “Do you know where I want to be, Anna? I want to be at the country house in England where I grew up. I want to be at my mother's side. I want to be sitting on the lawn in a patch of sunlight, with my shoes off and my toes wriggling. I want to be walking along the riverbank, while a handsome young man follows me into the wilderness. I can't be there, though, and I've come to accept that. As you, in time, will come to accept that you're now living here with us at Raven's Briar.”
“She'll come and get me,” Anna whispered.
“No-one's coming to get you.”
“She loves me too much to leave me here.”
“She's dead, Anna.”
At this, Anna shook her head.
“I saw her body,” Ms. Eversham continued. “I almost felt sorry for her, but then I remembered what kind of a person she was when she was alive.”
Anna shook her head again.
“At Raven's Briar,” Ms. Eversham added, “we help little girls to grow up. You want that, don't you?” She paused, seeing the fear in Anna's eyes. “You do want to grow up, don't you?”
“I want -”
“To grow up. That's right.”
Anna paused, staring deep into Ms. Eversham's jet-black eyes.
“I'm going to help you to grow up,” the woman continued, “and Constant is going to help you too. And so are all the other little girls here. Don't you think you might like that? Don't you think you might even enjoy growing up?”
Turning, Anna looked back at the carriage and saw that the horses were standing in the rain, apparently waiting for their next command. She felt that the horses probably didn't like being out in the rain either, but they were still being good, still being obedient. Turning back to Ms. Eversham, she realized that it might be better to go inside instead of standing out in the rain.
“Come on,” Ms. Eversham continued, taking her hand and leading her along the path and then up the stone steps. “I'll introduce you to the other girls. I think you're going to enjoy your time here at Raven's Briar.”
As soon as Anna was inside the building, Constant slammed the door shut.
III
“It's beautiful,” Estella whispered, standing in her bedroom and admiring herself in the full-length mirror as she modeled her wedding gown. “So very beautiful.”
Turning to the side, she stared with wide-eyed enthusiasm at her own reflection, marveling at the way the dress hugged her figure and glinted in the low candlelight. Having almost starved herself for a week so that she'd be able to fit into the dress, she felt as if she was on the verge of getting everything she had ever wanted.
“Yes,” she continued, as she imagined all the guests at the wedding complimenting her, “I know, I am lucky. Although luck is only part of the story, I also had to work very hard. There were sacrifices along the way, but I've always been the sort of person who looks at the bigger picture.” She smiled. “Yes, it feels so wonderful to be Lady Le Compte. I just can't wait to get started on the house, and on our family.” She twirled, as her thoughts filled with an image of the huge wedding reception. “Doubts?” she said after a moment. “Why, no, I never had any doubts, neither of us were -”
Stopping suddenly, the smile faded as she saw Kate's face in the back of her mind.
“Edgar is devoted to me,” Estella whispered, “and I to him.”
Closing her eyes, she imagined Edgar's hands running across her naked body on their wedding night. She had everything planned out, down to the tiniest detail: the candles all around the room; the silk bedsheets; their naked bodies locked together, his hands reaching up to caress her bare breasts, the sensation of him inside her, filling her, giving her the seed that would one day become their first child. She felt a shiver of anticipation run up through her belly at the mere thought of the union. It would, she had already decided, be
perfect.
“I love you,” she heard Edgar whispering in her mind, his voice filled with passion and longing. “I have loved you since the moment I first set eyes on you, and I shall love you for all eternity.”
“My heart is yours,” she imagined herself replying. “Always and forever.”
Now she saw Edgar with a rose held between his teeth, inviting her to join him on the dance-floor at her wedding. Guests clapped and smiled as the happy couple let their love show, although a few jealous figures still couldn't quite accept that someone as lowly as Estella Graves had become the most important woman on the whole island. Then again, she felt that those people deserved to wallow in their own pettiness, and as she and Edgar continued to dance in her mind, the image changed and suddenly she saw them together in Paris on their honeymoon, and then in London, and Barcelona, and New York, always laughing, always happy, always together. Finally she imagined sitting in bed, with Edgar by her side, as they looked down at their firstborn child.
Suddenly their whole life together seemed to spool out in her mind. She saw children – lots of children – and long, happy days spent in the sun. Their mansion would be a happy, open home filled with laughter and hope. The children would grow up, of course, and become the spitting images of their parents. She saw herself combing her daughters' hair, and swimming with them in the crystal blue waters off the island's northern beach, and traveling the world on luxurious steamers. A moment later, she saw herself walking with her daughters through the streets of Thaxos, with admiring locals bowing and offering their compliments. And then, when the children were busy, she saw herself and Edgar locked once again in a tender moment on the bed, their heaving bodies moving as one as they made love with a passion that would never, ever die.
And then, out of nowhere, an aspect of the image changed. She still saw Edgar on the bed, but now it was Kate on top of him, Kate locked into that union with Edgar's manhood deep inside; it was Kate's breasts being kissed, and Kate's body welcoming Edgar's seed; it was Kate's sweat mixing with Edgar's, and it was Kate whose lips touched his. Kate, everything was Kate, every ounce of passion was directed toward Kate and only Kate, and somehow the scene felt right and natural, as if that was how things should be, as if Kate was the only one who could make Edgar happy.
