“Yep.” I cried that day too, but for an entirely different reason. That was the day I found out I was pregnant. That was part of the reason I’d given Sadie her middle name.
“And you said that Sadie’s going to be twelve next month?” Bryson continued, “So that means you were pregnant when you moved.”
Oh shit. I’d spent so much time talking to Bryson that I’d gotten too comfortable. I didn’t even think about making sure I didn’t leave bread crumbs that would reveal things I didn’t want as public knowledge.
“So that means that the father is…” He didn’t finish.
“Yes.” I set the knife down. “But you can’t tell anyone.”
He stared at me in disbelief. “Colton doesn’t know?”
“Of course Colton knows. But, I don’t think he told anyone and I don’t want people to judge him for…anything. We were kids.”
Bryson shook his head back and forth. “You’re telling me that Colton McCord knows you had his child and he did nothing about it?”
No. He did something. He gave up all rights to her. “Yes. He knows.”
“Are you sure?” Bryson asked again, clearly unable to accept the truth.
“Yes. I’m sure.” I had the papers to prove it.
“I just…that’s so unlike him. I mean you were everything to him. He was so in love with you. From the time I moved here, he growled if anyone even looked at you.”
Since being back here I’d realized that people had built mine and Colton’s love story into something it wasn’t. I was trying to keep the urban legend from getting out of hand. “No, he didn’t. We didn’t start going out until middle school, you’d already been here five years.”
“Yes, he did and especially me because you were always with Jade, so I talked to you more than other third grade boys. He hated that you came over to my house to play. Believe me, he was marking his territory long before he was your boyfriend. I mean, he asked you to be his girlfriend your first day of middle school because he couldn’t exactly tell you he liked you when we were in third and you were in first. Or when he was in sixth and you were fourth. Or even when you were in fifth and we were in seventh. He basically waited for the first moment that it would be acceptable for him to be interested in you.”
I’d never thought about it like that.
“Well, whatever. That’s the past.” I started feeling panicked that now that Bryson knew, the entire town would. It was obvious that Colton wanted to keep it a secret. I was fairly sure that’s what he wanted to talk to me about. But, I’d come to terms with his decision a long time ago and I had no interest in discussing it. With him or anyone in this town. “Please don’t say anything. Jade doesn’t even know, or if she does, she hasn’t said anything. You know how this town is and with the show going on, I don’t want this getting out. I don’t want Sadie to be affected by this.”
Which is why we absolutely couldn’t live here.
“Alright.” Bryson put his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels. “I don’t like it. But if you don’t want me to say anything, I won’t.”
“Thank you.” I sighed in relief.
“It’s all right if I kick Colton’s ass on your behalf though, right?” Bryson lifted his hands in surrender. “I won’t tell him why I’m kicking his ass if you don’t want me to.”
“No. There will be no kicking of anyone’s ass.” I smiled. It was good to be around friends. Real friends that had known you forever.
“You’re no fun now that you’re a mom,” he teased.
“So Sadie tells me.”
“Oh shit.” He straightened and I saw a look of panic cross his face.
“What?” I froze.
“Colton’s going to be here tonight.” His eyes flew to the large clock that hung on the far wall. “He’ll be here in a couple hours.”
“What? Why?”
I’d heard through the grapevine that they were having a viewing party for the second episode of the show. They were halfway done with the show, which meant I was also at the halfway mark to the talk that I’d promised Colton.
Over the past couple of weeks, I’d been shocked at how little I’d seen him. There had only been two Colton sightings in the past fourteen days and those were both from a distance, and I was pretty sure he hadn’t seen me. Granted, I was actively trying to avoid him. But this was a small town and that was a lot easier said than done. Especially since he was dating twelve women that were living at my house.
“They’re having a viewing party for the show,” Bryson explained.
Ah, well, that made sense then.
“You don’t have to be here. I don’t want you to have to see…” his words faded like a song ending.
“To see my first love and the father of my child date a dozen women? Don’t worry, I’ve been doing it for years and I’m getting used to it.” I hated how jealous I sounded and felt.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. Like I said, it was the past.” Plus, this was a Friday night and I needed the tips.
“Okay, but if things get…weird…you can go. Anytime.”
“Thanks, Bry.”
There was a knock on the door. Regulars tended to get impatient if the doors weren’t opened at four on the dot.
“Looks like it’s about that time.” He made his way around the bar, pulling his keys from his pocket to open the doors. “Hey, you ever think things might’ve been easier if you’d fallen in love with me instead of Colton back in the day?”
“And rob Clover County of its most eligible bachelor?” I joked. “Never.”
When I heard the key turn in the door, I looked up with a smile, ready to greet the first customer, but my smile was short lived when I saw who was on the other side of it.
Colton McCord. And he did not look happy.
Chapter 15
Colton
“If ya rile her up and still think she’s the cutest thing on two legs, she’s the one.”
~ Papa Duke
“Oh hey, Colton.” Bryson looked surprised to see me as he held the door open for me. “You’re early.”
I didn’t step inside. “What did you just say?”
His head flinched back slightly. “I said…you’re early?”
Bryson had had a crush on Bella since we were kids. He used to talk about her being at his house all the time. It didn’t surprise me to hear him asking her if things would have been easier if she’d been in love with him, but it did piss me off. Not that I had any right to feel the anger I was feeling. I didn’t. I had absolutely no right. And maybe part of the reason I was so upset was because he might have a point.
I had handled things all wrong when we were teenagers, but at least then I had an excuse. Since she’d been back, one could argue, I’d handled things even worse, and I’m a grown man. I have absolutely zero excuse for not being able to tell her how bad I feel about the past, how much I wish I could go back in time and fix it, and that I’d do anything to make things right between us. But instead I’ve been a man I don’t even recognize. I’ve been anxious, rude, and ready to walk off a show that I committed to. That wasn’t me. I needed to pull my head out of my ass and I needed to do it quick.
“Hey, Colton.”
Her sweet voice interrupted my internal spiral and I looked past Bryson to see Bella lifting her hand in a wave. I hadn’t seen her since I left her house two weeks ago. Not once.
A calm washed over me. The irritation that I’d been feeling just seconds ago evaporated. She wasn’t just my soul mate, she was my soul’s balance. She just made everything…right.
Which made the way I’d been acting even worse.
“You okay, man?” Bryson asked, pulling my attention back to him.
“Yeah,” I nodded at my friend as I took off my hat and stepped in the bar. “I just came by to talk to Bella.”
“Oh.” Bryson’s brows rose and he looked even more surprised about that than he had when he’d opened the door to find me. He looked back
at Bella and I noticed that she nodded slightly, like she was giving him the okay to leave me alone with her.
“Okay, well,” Bryson pointed his thumbs towards the back of the bar. “I have some paperwork to catch up on. I’ll be in the office. If anyone comes in, just grab me and I’ll take care of it.”
“Will do.” Bella grinned.
We both watched Bryson as he disappeared down the hallway.
“What’s up?” Bella asked brightly.
A little too brightly.
“You two seem to be getting along really well.” That wasn’t what I’d come to talk about. I just opened my mouth and it came out.
She blinked several times before responding. “Yeah, we’re friends.”
“Is that all?” I tried to sound friendly. Curious even. It was none of my business if she and Bryson had anything going on, especially considering I was filming a reality dating show. She wasn’t mine, no matter how badly I wished things were different.
Her face scrunched in a way that I’d always thought was adorable. “Why?”
I walked up to the bar that she was standing behind and I watched her eyes widen slightly and saw her breathing pick up speed. I would bet anything that her pulse was racing just as much as mine. I lowered my voice, and leaned in a bit. Hoping that my charm would somehow camouflage my idiocy, I grinned the grin that had always helped my case whenever she was upset with me. “He’s always had a thing for you and I thought I heard him ask you if you ever wished it was him that you fell in love with instead of me. Do you?
I knew I was being an asshole. I could hear the words I was saying but I couldn’t stop them from coming out of my mouth. It felt like I was having an out of body experience.
Her eyes went from large and round to small and narrow. “Are you serious right now?”
“Yep.” I wasn’t an idiot. I knew that wasn’t the right thing to say. But I was going ninety on the Asshole Highway and for the life of me I couldn’t find an exit.
She clasped her hands behind her back and stretched her arms. It was something she’d done whenever she was mad for as long as I could remember. I remember I’d always thought it was cute, what I didn’t remember was what the stance did to her chest. I was acutely aware that if I looked down her cleavage would be spilling out of her black Tipsy Cow tank top, so I kept them laser focused on her gorgeous baby blues.
“Not that it’s any of your business, but no.” She emphasized the word. “I don’t.”
“Really?” I didn’t think that she’d lie to me, but I’d just found out from a reliable source, Tami Lynn, that Bella was getting divorced and I was going a little, or a lot, crazy.
That’s why she was here. In town. Because she was no longer with her husband. Which meant that I could tell her everything I wanted to. Not just about the past, but about the present. I could tell her how much I loved her, how much I’d always loved her.
I’d come straight here from The Spoon planning to do just that, or at least confirm that she wasn’t married anymore and before the door even opens I hear Bryson flirting with her.
“Yes. Really.” She released her arms from behind her back and started moving them as she spoke. She’d always gotten extra animated when she was mad. “We’re friends. Not that it’s any of your business. Why don’t you go worry about the twelve women you’re currently dating, huh? Why don’t you do that?”
Oh boy.
I knew when she started asking rhetorical questions, which only happened when she was gearing up to get good and mad, that things had gone horribly wrong. So I asked the question that I’d come here to ask. “Are you divorced?”
None of the rest of this crap mattered.
“What?!” She acted like my question gave her whiplash. “Why?!”
“Are you divorced?” I repeated calmly.
Her eyes closed for a moment and when she opened them again, she looked calmer. “I’m goi—” she started to speak but a group of about ten people came in, they sat in the large booth in the back of the room.
“Hey guys!” She lifted her hand in greeting. “I’ll be right with you.”
She leaned over the bar and spoke in a low voice, “I can’t talk right now.”
I wanted to kick my own ass for wasting so much time on bullshit that didn’t matter. My head dropped as she started moving around the bar. Before she made it to the table Bryson appeared from the back and beat her to it. “Can we talk?” I tried once more, knowing that if she told me to kick rocks she’d have every right.
Bella stared at me for a moment, sighed, and turned in the direction that Bryson had just come from. I followed my Pied Piper. My eyes, of their own accord, shot straight to her backside, this time I didn’t feel as guilty since she wasn’t a married woman. I wasn’t paying attention when she stopped up short in the middle of the hallway. I bumped into her, knocking her forward.
My arm reached out and wrapped her waist instinctively to catch her. When she straightened back up her body was pressed up against me and my thumb was brushing the skin on her belly just above her jeans.
I began moving it in a circular motion, I didn’t mean to, honestly. It’s just what my thumb did when I touched her. No one else. I’d never done that to any other girl I’d touched.
We both went completely still, other than the motion of my thumb. For a split second, she melted against me and I closed my eyes. But before I even shut my eyes completely, she pulled out of my grasp.
She was tugging her shirt pulling it back in place when she turned around. When she was facing me, she straightened her back, cleared her throat and took a step away from me. “We agreed that we would talk after the finale.”
“I agreed to that when I thought you were married.” I’d tried to be respectful but I hadn’t done a very good job. I was basically breaking the thou shall not covet another man’s wife commandment on a twenty-four hour a day, seven day a week basis, but I had tried.
“What does that have to do with anything?” Her hands flew up again as she boiled over with frustration.
I didn’t want her to be upset. I didn’t come here to upset her, especially right before her shift. I hated that I was the cause of her being unhappy. I took a step forward, “Bella, please don—”
“No.” She held her hand out, stopping me in my tracks. “Do not ‘Bella, please’ me. We had an agreement Colton. I said that I would talk to you in twenty-five days and you agreed to give me time. That was fourteen days ago. So just in case your math skills have gotten rusty, there are still eleven days left.”
With that, she pushed past me and as I watched her storm down the hall back to the front of the building all I could think was that she was counting the days, too. I just couldn’t tell if it was because she was dreading it or looking forward to it. It seemed like a little of both…I would take that. I would take anything Bella Connor offered.
Chapter 16
Bella
“When you climb in the saddle you better be prepared to ride.”
~ Papa Duke
The sun was barely peeking over the horizon. The birds were chirping. And the air was crisp. I tried to let my serene surroundings settle down the anxiety bubbling up in me as I walked down the path towards my fate. Whatever that may be. I’d known this moment was coming for twenty-five days, so I’d had plenty of time to prepare myself, but I was still a basket case.
Up until yesterday, I hadn’t had any idea what I wanted to do. For twenty-four and a half days I’d been in a constant state of turmoil trying to figure out what I should do, what I should say, but then two envelopes arrived yesterday and they gave me clarity.
Now, I knew exactly what I was going to say. I knew exactly what I wanted. I just didn’t know how Colton was going to respond to it.
My palms grew damp again and I wiped them on my jeans…again. Holes in the knees of denim were a cute look, holes above the knee…not so much. If I didn’t get a handle on my nerves I was going to wear down my jeans and have two large holes on
my thighs.
Last night I’d watched the finale of the show where Colton had chosen Heather, the part-time model and law student. I’d liked her from the beginning. When she’d sat in my chair the first thing that had struck me was that she was beautiful. The second thing was that she wasn’t crazy, like most of the other girls I’d styled.
I’d known she was going to be his choice because Heather had shown up on the porch of the back house carrying an envelope and told me. She’d handed it to me and told me that she and Colton had an arrangement.
Early on, she’d figured out that he didn’t really want any kind of relationship. It was obvious to Heather that Colton was just going through the motions, so she’d broken the rules and gone to talk to him when the cameras weren’t rolling. She’d explained that while she’d gone into the show open to anything, the real reason she was here was because she hated law school and was only going for her parents. She’d done some modeling but nothing significant. She hoped that doing this show would gain her exposure and her parents would support her decision to leave school. So, she proposed that they pretend to fall in love, then go on the two-week vacation together, and break up when they got back.
From what she’d said, he’d been beyond relieved that she’d come to him. He’d agreed instantly and they’d been acting this entire time. Apparently, they were both doing a really good job because they were all anyone was talking about. She wasn’t just the front runner, she’d been the only runner.
I hadn’t watched the show except for last night. The only time I’d come close was the viewing party at The Cow. But I left before he came back. Bryson had insisted on it after seeing the two of us together.
I stepped over a large branch that had fallen on the ground and I saw Colton sitting on our log. I took a deep breath and stopped walking. This was it. Make or break time. If I took another step chances were he’d hear me and turn around. If I was going to chicken out, this was the time.
Instead of going forward or back, I stayed in place. It kind of felt like a representation of my life. I was stuck.
Claiming Colton (Wishing Well, Texas Book 5) Page 11
