Some and the Flame

by Michelle, Christine

“Yeah, something you may have noticed if you’d even checked in with her for more than two minutes a day,” Chief stated, not leaving out the disdain he felt as it dripped from his words to my ears.

  “Shit,” I huffed. “How about we get you guys home, and then we’ll figure everything out where you can relax?” Poppy didn’t answer, instead I watched as her attention shifted beyond where we were all standing by her car to someone not too far off. It took a moment for me to track her field of vision and then put two and two together with what she was seeing. “No,” I told her as I pointed to her car. “Get in, drive home, and I’ll meet you there.” We were not going to focus on Julie, or the fact that she’d been standing there watching us. She wasn’t even on my radar before and I wouldn’t waste a moment more thinking of her. All I wanted was to get Poppy and Brant home and just be at peace with them.

  On my way to my bike to follow them, I texted her to meet me at her own house. I wanted to stay there with my woman and my nephew away from the prying eyes of the club for a little bit. I needed some normalcy without the pity-laced looks being thrown at me, or worse, the concerned looks from those who were wondering when I was going to flip my shit and forget the need to be discrete while seeking my vengeance.

  When I got to the house and she didn’t answer the door right away, I moved to go through the gate on the side of the house in order to get into the backyard. “Figured you were out here when you didn’t answer.”

  “What if I just wasn’t up for company and ignoring you?”

  I could tell by her response that she had been dwelling on the scene she’d witnessed with Julie’s suckerfish impersonation, so I didn’t bother to wait to clarify that. “I haven’t seen or spoken to Julie in six months until this morning. She heard about Soph and showed up, caught up to me as I heading to the,” once again I found that the word just wouldn’t leave my throat. It was stuck there again. “What you saw wasn’t…”

  Poppy threw her hands up in the air to wave away what I’d been about to say. “Stop. It doesn’t matter, because the only reason I entertained doubts was because of your behavior over the past few days. Had you been around at all, helping with Brantley, I would have never thought…” Shit! My whole body slumped in on itself with her words. She was right. I had done this. By not being present in their lives, I had given her reason to doubt.

  “I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t sit still. In the brief minutes when I do, everything is real and she’s never coming back. She was my little sister, but I raised her too. After my dad left, when my mom had to work so much, it was me looking after them. They’re like my kids in a way, and now,” I swallowed down the emotion that was clogging my ability to speak. “She’s gone and Kent won’t speak to me, because he thinks it’s my fault. I don’t know what to do with all that.”

  “I understand. I really, honestly do understand what you’re going through. That doesn’t make it easier when I have a past that clouds everything in muck. I know that shouldn’t fall on you, but I can’t help the way I feel or that I’m questioning everything now, because I didn’t question enough before.”

  I stepped closer to her and reached out to pull her to me. “I’m sorry, Poppy.” I clung to her, inhaling her familiar scent, taking comfort in her presence, and then I felt it all over again. That desperate ache where my vibrant sister used to fill the space with happiness. The spot in my heart where Bender used to tell his ridiculous jokes and make me laugh. Those spots I didn’t think would ever feel full again threatened to drown me as my body shook with the effort to hold off the grief a little longer. Inhale – the subtle, sweet vanilla scent that lingered around Poppy. Exhale – all the memories that were threatening to pull me under. It took a few minutes before I was able to pull it together, and she must have sensed the shift, because she waited until that moment to speak.

  “Will they come for us too?”

  “No!” I answered on instinct. “I’ve had Gray watching out for you two.”

  “Surfer-dude?”

  I grinned at her. “Yeah, surfer-dude. He’s been watching the house when I haven’t been here.”

  “I haven’t seen a bike out there the past few days.”

  “That’s because he’s been incognito in a fucking cage. Listen, Poppy, I know what you were thinking and I just need you to understand that you weren’t forgotten. You haven’t been far from my mind, in fact, I’ve been gone so much to make sure you don’t end up like Soph. I want you and Brant safe even if that means I can’t be here while I’m hunting for the assholes who destroyed my family.”

  Chapter 10

  Poppy seemed far more exhausted than I had given her credit for at the cemetery. By the time we got home she could barely keep her eyes open and I did my best to convince her just to go take a nap. I thought she would just go down for a quick nap, but when I called her for dinner and she didn’t even stir, I figured she needed the break more than I thought so I let her be.

  “Is Popwee otay?” Brant asked while we were eating some pizza for dinner.

  “She’s okay, little man, just tired.”

  “Popwee is sick. She frowned up.”

  “I know. Chief told me.”

  “Teef is Popwee’s brudder like you mommy’s brudder?”

  “Yeah,” I managed to get out before I had to turn away and pull myself together. “Chief is Poppy’s brother.”

  “I miss my mommy,” Brant spoke softly into the last of his pizza slice. I scooted him over from his booster seat onto my lap and we sat like that for a bit.

  “I miss her too, little man. Every day,” I stated solemnly, staving off another wave of overwhelming sadness. “What do you say we get you a bubble bath set up? I brought some of your toys from the house. You can pick two to take in the tub with you.”

  “Otay,” he mumbled as his head continued to lie there on my chest. I knew then that missing his parents was getting to him more than he realized. The kid normally loved bubble baths more than any woman I’d ever met.

  “Do you want to just sit here with me for a little while instead?”

  His little hands fisted in the cotton of my t-shirt and pulled tight while I felt the tell-tale wetness from his tears. I ran my hand up and down his back and let him have his moment. I sat there rocking his little body against me for the longest time before I realized the wetness I was feeling on my shirt was no longer tears, but little boy drool. I carried him to the second bedroom that Poppy had managed to transform into a little boy’s spot without me noticing over the past couple of days. I don’t know how she managed to find the time, and I had a sneaking suspicion some of the old ladies must have helped out. It squeezed at my heart just a little bit more. I’d practically dumped my nephew in her lap, and she didn’t complain about it. Instead, she made a home for him to fall into so he wouldn’t feel so out of place.

  Once I tucked his little body into bed, I turned and made sure the nightlight was on and watched as Bubba curled up beside the bed with his back to the bed and face toward the door. “Good boy, Bubba. You watch over my boy.” Bubba snuffled as if to say, “Duh,” to me and rested his snout on his paws. I moved through the house locking up, cleaning our mess, and then made my way to the other bedroom. Poppy was still knocked out and I didn’t want to disturb her after all the shit I’d put off on her over the past week. Instead, I undressed down to my boxer briefs, crawled in beside her, and pulled her tight to my body.

  Her sweet scent and warmth lulled me to sleep quickly, and it was the first peaceful night I’d spent since I left her in Pittsburgh with my brother. The fucking night where everything fell apart. I knew I would be distracted even more over the coming days as we started to get more intel on the bastards behind the barn explosions and my sister’s death. It made me hold on tighter to the woman in my arms, because the bad shit wasn’t behind us yet – not by a long shot.

  I heard both Brant and Bubba stirring, and Poppy was still dead to the world, so I got up to go check on them and let Bubba out into the b
ackyard. Once he did his business, I set about making Brant breakfast since I hadn’t been around to do the little things with him since his release from the hospital. His bruised face was already starting to change colors with some shades of ugly yellow, green, and the deeper purples still lurking near the center of his wounds. He’d been lucky that he was still so small.

  Glancing around Poppy’s kitchen, it quickly became obvious that I would either have to go to the store or make do with what she had there. Eggs and pancakes it was. She did at least have a little orange juice I could give little man as well. I set about making breakfast and sneaking Brant a few football shaped pancakes before I heard Poppy up and moving in the other room.

  “Poppy?” I called out, but she didn’t answer right away and I assumed she was using the bathroom. I quickly lost my train of thought where she was concerned though when I saw one of the pancake footballs fly through the air and land in Bubba’s mouth. Brant clapped furiously as the dog managed to catch the wobbly throw.

  “Little man, those are not the kinds of balls we throw. You eat them, the dog doesn’t.”

  “But he catched it.”

  “I saw that. Bubba’s good at catching, but we don’t throw food.”

  He huffed and stuffed another pancake football in his mouth before I heard the bathroom door open again. I didn’t bother calling out to her this time and just waited for her to come and join us.

  “Hey!” Her sleep roughened voice was sexy as fuck, but she wasn’t looking to great, despite the nearly 16 hours of sleep she managed to pack in.

  “Hey babe, we were just making pancakes for breakfast. Want some?”

  “Sure.”

  “You were out of pretty much every breakfast meat,” I explained to her as I held up the pan with the scrambled eggs in it. “I made eggs too though.”

  “I see that, thank you.” She turned away from me quickly and tried to find something else to talk about for some reason. I figured she was still pissed at me for dropping my responsibilities in her lap, or maybe for the fact that my ex had latched on to me at the funeral yesterday and caused such a scene that I hadn’t even been able to do what made me late in the first place. The necklace that had belonged to my mother was still in my pocket where I’d tucked it when I followed Poppy and Brant home yesterday.

  Unfortunately, I didn’t get to sit down and eat with her because about the time she started talking to Brant, my cell started ringing. I glanced over at Poppy feeling guilty as fuck, but knowing I needed to answer all the same. She gave me a wry smile and turned back to my nephew and humored him while I answered.

  “Yeah,” I called out to the phone. At first, I didn’t tune in to whoever was speaking because all I could hear was Poppy and Brantley talking.

  “Those are some pretty fancy looking pancakes you have, buddy,” Poppy said to Brant as she leaned in and placed a sweet kiss on his head.

  “Unc Moke telled me no frowing dez balls.”

  Her laughter was a balm to my soul even if it wasn’t directed toward me. “He’s right. That would make a mess, and Bubba might eat them.”

  “Bubbsba likes cancakes, Popwee.”

  “Yo! Smoke! I heard called out through the line. “Are you listening or what?”

  “Sorry, my mind’s elsewhere right now. What’s going on?”

  “We have something you might want to check out. Doc managed to get some information out of the girl, and Quickshot and his woman ran with it. They think they have something.”

  If they had something, I had no choice but to go and handle business. I knew it wouldn’t make Poppy happy. We needed to have a talk and I needed to not leave her with the kid I’d inherited. I felt bad and torn in so many different directions it physically hurt. I tuned back into my nephew and Poppy’s conversation because he turned toward me with an accusing look.

  “Because it’s not good for him,” Poppy was explaining as Brantley’s mouth dropped open, and all I saw was him pushing the pancakes out of his mouth with his tongue while he glared in my direction. Great, my nephew thought I was trying to poison him now.

  “Cancakes bad?”

  “Pancakes aren’t bad for little boys, just doggies,” she tried to explain.

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know why. They just are.”

  My nephew eyeballed the dog for a minute before turning back to Poppy and telling her how it really was. “He wikes dem.”

  “Are you still there? We’re meeting up in 15 at the clubhouse. Church for everyone in the know,” Hopper informed me.

  “I’ll be there,” I said as the line disconnected, and I stuffed the cell back in my pocket. “Hey babe,” I called out to Poppy and watched as her shoulders stiffened. She knew what was coming, and her reaction made me feel even worse.

  “You have to go?”

  “Yeah, I do. I want to talk with you, but it’s going to have to wait awhile. Are you okay with that?”

  She sighed deeply, and I couldn’t beat the feeling back that I might be doing irreparable harm to our relationship. “Yeah, go do what you have to do.”

  “Pop, I don’t want to go. This is important though.”

  “I get it, Smoke, really. Go; take care of your crap. We’ll be fine.”

  “I’ll send someone in a bit to grab Brant for a bit if I’m going to be too long. You need to be able to get your stuff done too, and I know that’s not easy with a little one running around.”

  “It’s fine. I’ll let you know if I ever need help.”

  “I’ll call you later and see how things are going.” I set a plate loaded down with pancakes and eggs in front of her before I leaned in and kissed the top of her head and then reached over and did the same to Brant. “I’ll be back later, lil man, you listen to Poppy, and be a good boy for me okay?”

  “Otay, Unc Moke. Bye” He waved his syrup-laden fingers at me, and I just barely managed to dodge out of his reach before he swiped them down my kutte.

  “Looks like you were right,” Ghost told me as I sat down in my seat next to our road captain, Wren.

  “Do I even want to know what I was right about?”

  “The tattoos on the man you guys caught with Shep’s family and the one on the thumb webbing of the digit you found at the barn fire are both Russian in nature. The second being the same thing that Gregor had on him when he used to hang around.”

  I nodded my head. “Have we found links between the dead guy and any specific group?”

  “We did, but it’s just a theory at this point. I have Quickshot checking into shit still, but we’re thinking the Stasevich Bratva is behind all of it.”

  “Never heard of them.” There were a slew of Russian mafia type groups as well as Irish, Italian, and just mutt crews of punks who took street gangs one step further.

  Ghost sighed deeply. “They’re very much known for trafficking women, and sometimes children. It’s all a matter of what brings in the most money for them.”

  “That’s not really a surprise since they were willing to take Tammy and Lindsay as payment for Chad’s debt,” I told him.

  “Don’t think they gave two shits about Tammy. Lindsay, on the other hand, was worth quite a bit to them. From what Quick has been able to dig up so far, they wanted her because virgins sell at a premium, and Chad assured them she’s a virgin.”

  “Fucking hell,” I hissed. “Are we able to pass any of this along to Shep? He needs to know that they won’t stop looking for her.” I pounded my fist into the table in front of me. “Better yet, has Quick managed to get an address? Any kind of fuckin’ location where we can get ahold of these bastards and end them?”

  “He’s still working on it, Smoke. You’ll know as soon he does, I promise you that.” He glanced around the table. “As for Shep and his family, you need to check in with him and see what he wants to do. You know we’d be glad to have him on board here with us, and if he makes that happen, it frees up a few places where our hands are tied. Family first. See if he’s willing to
put in the time to prospect.”

  “He rides a rocket not a cruiser,” I mentioned and heard a few people snickering around the table.

  Ghost shrugged his shoulders. “I know some clubs give a shit about that, but I don’t. Riding is riding. He wants to be free in the wind on a fucking rice burner, then he can be.”

  “I’ll check in with him and see what he wants to do.” I stood to leave before turning back. “If he declines, will that affect his family being able to stay with the women in S.H.E.?”

  “You know Angel Girl isn’t going to turn them out,” Ghost informed me. I didn’t think she would, especially not the girl. Tammy was a different story though since she could be a bit difficult. “I’ll keep you updated on their situation too so you can get word back to Shep.” We had Shep locked down from talking to his family for all of their safety. I tipped my chin at Ghost, but before I managed to get out the door, he was speaking again. “You have work?”

  “Nah, gotta take a leak,” I explained why I had been so eager to get out the fucking door.

  Ghost laughed. “Go take care of business, and then get back here. I’m going to put Angel Girl on and let you work shit out with how long the women will be down there, and what you think may need to happen with them from here on out.”

  “Sounds great.” It did, until I got a text from Chief.

  Chief: Might want to get to Poppy’s ASAP.

  Smoke: WTF?

  Chief: Julie is here. Heading in now.

  I ran back out to the large office area where we held church and ducked my head in. “Need to head to Poppy’s really quick. Julie’s there causing trouble. Be back when I get that shit sorted.”

  “Go!” Was all Ghost said, and I was on my fucking way to deal with the cunt that would not stop infecting my life with her bullshit.

  Seeing Julie standing there just shy of the front stoop of Poppy’s home pissed me off something fierce. I roared into the driveway, parking just to the rear and off to the right of Chief’s bike so that I wouldn’t be blocking him in. It was habit, because it sure as fuck wasn’t what was on my mind. “What in the hell are you doing at this house?”