Not Even For a Duke

by A. S. Fenichel

  Even the early and unexpected arrival of the Aasberg girls seemed to be well timed. She’d not expected their arrival and that of Miss Stein to trigger the drunken temper of the Hexon, but even that scene had come at the right time. The Wallflowers hadn’t needed to instigate anything. Hexon showed his true colors without the least help from her friends. It would be some time before she could make amends to poor Miss Stein, but at least her mother would no longer foist the duke’s attentions on her. If she was really lucky, maybe it would be the end of any matchmaking attempts by her parent.

  She just couldn’t see herself allowing another man to lord power over her. Garrett’s warm smile and kind eyes flashed in her mind. He said he wanted her, and it hadn’t been easy to reject him. Yet, fear grew at the notion of ever marrying again.

  Footsteps sounded in the gallery which led from the front parlor to the back of the house and the glassed conservatory. Perhaps she should blow out her candle and stay hidden from whoever was striding so purposefully across the floors. A man, certainly. Not likely a servant. Could Hexon be sober enough to walk so decidedly already?

  Probably not.

  Garrett, Geb, Malcolm, or Wesley then. Though she couldn’t imagine Wesley would leave his wife’s bed to wander the halls in the middle of the night.

  She fingered the sapphire end of her hat pin in case it was Malcolm, but she felt certain the sound of the gait was Garrett. Her heart did a little jump knowing it was likely Garrett making his way toward her.

  He stopped in the doorway. “I wish you would not sit here alone with certain gentlemen still under this roof.”

  Without his cravat tied and no coat, the full breadth of his wide shoulders filled the threshold. A dark smattering of hair peeked from the open collar. Concern darkened his eyes even in the light of the three-candle candelabra he held aloft.

  “How did you know I was not in bed?” Aurora leaned back on the arm of the long settee. It was one of two matching pieces that stood filling the center of the conservatory. The navy-blue cushions had seen better days, but the furniture was comfortable and the color rich against the marble floors.

  Garrett entered, put his candelabra on the floor to the right of the settee and sat next to her. “I didn’t. After the scene in the parlor, I couldn’t sleep and thought to ease my worry by having a look around the house. Just to make sure Hexon hadn’t gone on another drunken rage.”

  Everything Garrett had done in the past few days showed a man who was thoughtful and kind. He’d accepted her decisions, let her fight her own battles and stood ready to join her cause if needed. Had he always been so attuned to her needs?

  Brushing the thought aside, she turned her attention back to the dark. “It was ugly, but it’s better to know his true character sooner than later.”

  “Were you warming to your mother’s idea of him courting you?” Something dangerous crackled in his voice.

  “No.” She shifted to face him. “I never even considered the idea. However, now Mother knows his character and he will likely leave the county sooner rather than later.”

  “What will you do if he does not intend to vacate with haste?” Garrett made the inquiry lightly, but that steel remained in his tone.

  Aurora had thought a lot about this problem. “What will you do?”

  “I am not master of this house, Rora. I am happy to deal with Hexon for you, but not without your leave to do so.”

  “Do not all men take charge and barrel through a lady’s problems as if they had a right to do so?” She was poking a dragon and she knew it, yet she couldn’t stop herself.

  He filled his cheeks with air and blew it out slowly. “I will not be lumped in with all the men you speak of. It is unfair for you to put me into some category of male bullies you have conjured in your head.”

  Guilt swelled inside her. “It is. I apologize.”

  As if she hadn’t spoken, he continued. “I understand the propensity, Rora. Your father was a bully and even Rhys can be pushy.”

  “His wife has him well in hand,” she laughed.

  “Indeed.” Garrett let a smile slip before turning serious again. “What you have told me of Radcliff shows he was a monster. I am not any of those men. You are a bright, resourceful woman of an age and situation where you can act and speak for yourself. I am only curious as to how you will deal with the duke should he not remember his behavior or choose not to remove himself from Whickette.”

  “I will ask him to leave.” Her stomach turned but she was resolved.

  “May I ask another question?”

  She nodded.

  “If it had been Hexon or Renshaw rather than me tonight in the dark, what would you have done?” He watched her with those intense light brown eyes.

  “I surmised it was you long before you arrived at the door. Hexon’s steps would not have been so steady after all his drinking, and Malcolm has a slower gait. Besides, he and I came to an understanding this afternoon. However, if I was in danger, I have weapons at my disposal.”

  “Do you?” There was amusement in Garrett’s voice.

  She touched the sturdy metal figure of a dog on the table next to her, looked Garrett in the eye and slid a long hat pin from her coiffed hair. “This usually is enough of a surprise to give a lady time to run or at the very least find another weapon or even to land a well-placed kick.”

  Garrett took the pin by the large ruby and studied it. He touched his finger to the sharp end and grinned. “I had no idea young ladies were so resourceful, but I suppose I should have known. Is this type of armament common?”

  “I couldn’t say, but the Wallflowers of West Lane are generally thus armed and exceedingly careful. Wesley’s young sisters have begun to keep a hat pin handy too. You would be surprised how often men who call themselves gentlemen forget themselves.” She took back her pin and slid it carefully into her hair.

  “It is difficult to imagine you using it, but before today, I couldn’t have imagined Mercy taking up a statue to bludgeon a man. However, now I can certainly visualize the event. I’ve never been thus attacked by a woman.” He leaned his elbows on his knees, his grin in place.

  Aurora liked the way his hair curled slightly at the collar and she wondered if it was soft or coarse. “I’m pleased to hear you have never taken liberties that might cause a lady to protect herself or her virtue.”

  “I prefer a lady be willing and enthusiastic,” he chuckled.

  Something knotted low in Aurora’s stomach. “Have you had many lovers, Garrett?”

  Now he sat straight and fidgeted. “I’m not a virgin, Rora, but to say more would not be gentlemanly.”

  It shouldn’t bother her if he had a dozen mistresses. Yet, the idea sent a cold chill to her bones. “I suppose I should retire for the night. It was kind of you to check the house. In fact, all your actions today have been very helpful. Thank you.”

  He stood and offered his hand to her. Once she took it and rose, he kissed her fingers. “It is nothing. Anyone would have done the small things I managed. It is nothing to send the servants to prepare rooms and stand ready when a peer acts an ass.”

  It was more than that, but she wasn’t ready to discuss how his help had affected her. “Well, I appreciate it none the less.”

  They walked through the fine gallery to the parlor before making their way to the foyer and up the stairs. He was a steady force beside her through the day and part of her wanted the feeling to continue.

  She stopped in front of her door and looked at him in the candlelight. It was hard to catch her breath while her heart beat so quickly. “I think my brother will arrive with Faith and Nick tomorrow.”

  Something sad passed through his eyes. “Then with Rhys here and Hexon gone, I will likely take my leave the following day.”

  Overcome with worry and fear, which she couldn’t explain, she gripped his hands. “You must have other commitments that you’ve put aside for me. I’m sorry to have kept you from more important matters.”

&
nbsp; Leaning in, he kissed her forehead. “Oh, my dear Rora, there is nothing more important to me than you. However, I will leave the day after tomorrow. I have business in Scotland and then in London.”

  It was hard to know what to do or say. She didn’t want him to leave her. The idea of being in her own room alone and without comfort suddenly scared her. It was ridiculous since she’d been without male company for over two years and had not enjoyed a moment of her husband’s company. Yet, this was not Radcliff and the events of the day had left her feeling fragile. “I understand, but I will miss your company.”

  He tipped his head to one side and studied her. “Will you?”

  “I may not be capable of returning your generous feelings, Garrett, but that does not mean I don’t enjoy your friendship and company.” There. She sounded perfectly competent.

  Those beautiful lips tipped up and he looked stunning in the dim hall outside her bedroom. “Good night, Rora.”

  “I have brandy.” The words blurted out of her mouth before she could stop them.

  “I beg your pardon?” He had half-turned to continue down the hall, but stopped and returned his gaze to hers.

  Gathering her bravery, she closed her eyes a moment and drew in a long breath. She couldn’t go on as a sad lonely widow. Opening her eyes, she found him staring at her. “In my room. I have brandy. Would you care for a glass?”

  “Are you inviting me into your bedroom, Rora?” Something dark and dangerous vibrated in the low tone of his voice.

  She nodded and spoke quickly. “For a drink. I’m not ready to sleep and it has been a long day with much to keep my mind occupied.”

  Wordlessly, he reached behind her and opened her door. The newly oiled hinges were silent and a small fire lit the well-appointed room.

  Swallowing down her nerves, Aurora turned and entered. It was the master’s chamber that Aurora had claimed. It was her house after all. It took a concentrated effort to keep her eyes off the large bed with heavy drapes as Garrett closed the door and sealed them inside. “It’s more masculine than I would choose, but it’s a nice room.”

  Aurora walked to the table where a crystal decanter stood with two glasses. She poured and only startled slightly when Garrett came close to put his candelabra on the table.

  The scent of soap and fresh air hung on him in the most alluring way. She missed it when he moved away to add a log to the fire. Late summer brought with it cooler nights.

  As the log sparked, Garrett stood watching the flames with one hand on the mantel. “I’m more than a little surprised you would invite me into your room.”

  Steeling her nerves, she crossed to him with the glasses and handed him one. “I’m not some maiden aunt. I’m a grown woman.”

  Eyes full of passion, he put the glass on the mantel and faced her. “Oh? Are you inviting me in for more than a drink?”

  She put her own glass next to his and the move brought her an inch from him. She craned her neck to look at him. “To be honest, I don’t know what I want. I didn’t wish to be alone. Does that make me very selfish?”

  “No.” The word came out on a breath, and he ran his knuckles along her jaw. “You are never selfish. I have to warn you though; if you have some notion of offering yourself in hopes that I will be too gentlemanly to accept, you are mistaken. I will not be strong enough to resist such a gift.”

  “You’ve had many lovers. Perhaps I could be just one more.” Her pulse pounded so hard in her ears; it was a wonder he didn’t comment on the noise. She’d given no thought to sex in the years since Radcliff died. At least not until these last months when Garrett had come back into her life. Before Radcliff’s death, sex had been an event to dread when he was sober enough to manage and when he wasn’t he often beat her for his deficiency.

  “I never said that, and you could never be just anyone, not to me.” He leaned in a fraction and the heat of him swept over her.

  Her breasts ached and awareness sparked between her legs. “I think I’m aroused by you, Garrett.”

  His hand slid around her back and wrapped around her waist, easing her forward to feel his passion. “Why do you sound as if that’s such a surprise?”

  Standing stock-still, she caught her breath. “It has never happened before.”

  Like the wings of a butterfly, he let his lips graze her temple. “Never?”

  “Once, when we danced at the ball, I thought perhaps I should consider taking a lover.” She admitted though her cheeks flushed.

  His smile stretched. “You danced with me and considered taking someone else as a lover? I don’t know if I should be flattered or offended.”

  “Considering our current proximity, it would be better if you were flattered.” Her voice lost its steadiness as fear worked its way into her bravado.

  “Shall I help you out of your gown, Rora?” Soft assuredness warmed his voice.

  With a nod, Aurora turned her back to expose the laces of her gown. “I’m a little afraid, Garrett.”

  His hands stilled. “I would never hurt you. You must know that.”

  “I know and if it were anyone else, I would not mention my trepidation. You have always been one of the few people I trust. I thought you should know.” She tried to calm her breathing but despite her resolve to relieve her desire, she couldn’t separate the act from her past.

  Once her gown was untied, he slid the fabric down and kissed her shoulder. “You are in control, sweetheart. Look at me.”

  She turned and watched as he pulled his shirt over his head. Her heart skipped with excitement and not fear at the sight of his broad chest with a dark smattering of hair, muscles that tapered to his abdomen and disappeared beneath his breeches.

  “You look very fine.” Reaching to touch him, she pulled back a moment before her skin met his.

  Garrett snatched up her hand and placed the palm on his chest. He reached behind and slid the hat pin from her hair. “You needn’t skewer me. Your command will be enough should you wish to stop.”

  Unable to help herself, she grinned back at him. She stepped out of the puddle of her gown. With only her corset and shift, she felt exposed, but not afraid. This was nothing like the times whenever Radcliff had invaded her bedchamber. Running her fingers over his small nipple drew a sharp breath from him. There was power in bringing pleasure and a strange satisfaction she’d never expected.

  Wishing her voice could be steadier, she forced out her desire. “Will you untie my corset?”

  Before she could turn, he wrapped his arms around her and drew her close enough for her to place her cheek on his warm hard chest while he worked at her laces. When they fell to the floor, he discarded the boned restraint and carried her to the bed.

  Like a piece of fragile crystal, he eased her to the mattress. “You are so beautiful.”

  Unable to move or breathe, she stared as he toed off and discarded his boots and his breeches went next. Completely naked, he stood beside the bed. His warm skin glowing in the firelight. His shaft stood proudly from his body.

  Panic bloomed in her chest. “I don’t know if I can do this.” She rolled to her side and pulled her knees up to wrap her arms around them.

  The bed dipped and Aurora stiffened, but then his arms wrapped around her while his body formed to hers. “Shh. Do not make yourself uneasy. You are in charge. Remember? You can tell me no and that will be the end of it.”

  “You wouldn’t be disappointed?” Tears choked her.

  A low rumble of laughter brightened the mood. “I would be extremely disappointed, but not angry or regretful. I want you, Rora, but if it is not mutual, it would be nothing. You said you were aroused. Has that feeling left you?”

  “No.” The truth of her denial was surprising. “But the act has held nothing but pain and shame for me in the past.”

  He kissed her back.

  A thrill spiraled to every inch of her flesh.

  “I am so sorry, sweetheart. Lovemaking should be full of joy and pleasure and love when poss
ible.”

  As she relaxed, her body formed to his like pieces of a puzzle long separated. “I have no knowledge of what you describe.”

  A low whisper along with a kiss vibrated at her ear and with it her body roared with need. Garrett said, “You have a choice, my dearest. You can trust me enough to show you how precious this can be, you can tell me to go, or I can hold you for as long as you wish and nothing more.”

  No anger. No disgust. He laid out choices, two of which would leave them both unsatisfied, as if the decision was truly hers. Doubt flooded her. “Surely, you will not be satisfied with any but the first.”

  “I would hold you through the night and be happy to do so. But I’ll not lie and say I do not wish for more. I want to show you how much can be shared in a loving bed. But the decision shall always be yours, this night and always.” He placed one brief kiss behind her ear.

  “I’m afraid, Garrett, but I do trust you.” She tried not to tremble but failed as her words shook.

  Another kiss, this time on her cheek. “How about we drink that brandy now?”

  Shocked and relieved, she sat up and watched him walk across the room to the mantel. His rear, round and firm, was as fine to look at as his front. She blushed but scanned down to his very muscular legs.

  He didn’t turn as he clasped both glasses. His shoulders rose and fell on a long breath. “Why don’t you slip under the covers?”

  Happy to cover herself, she did as he suggested and sat with her back against the carved wooden headboard. She propped up a few pillows behind her and tried to hide that she watched him walk back gloriously naked.

  A knowing smile on those lips that made her more and more curious, he handed her a glass before sliding under the sheet and propping up his own pillows. He sipped. “I wonder that you haven’t seen a naked man before with the way you gawked at me.”

  Nearly sputtering out her brandy, she wiped the drip from her chin. “I have,” she protested. “However, you look much finer than the one I have seen before.”