Not Even For a Duke

by A. S. Fenichel

  Garrett used spending time with the new arrivals as an excuse to be near Aurora. He knew he had to leave, but it wasn’t going to be easy.

  “Must you leave tomorrow, Garrett?” Faith asked while they all sat in a conversational grouping of two settees and four overstuffed chairs.

  He nodded. “I’m afraid so. I put off my travel north for long enough. I believe I shall let out my Scotland home. I’ve no need for it now that I’ve inherited. If I can find a good tenant and my steward will check in quarterly, I can take an item off my list of worries.”

  A carriage rolled to a stop outside. Nick eased to the window as if an attacking force might be arriving. “It would seem someone is taking his leave today.”

  The words were only just out of his mouth when the door opened and Hexon stepped through. He bowed. “Lady Radcliff, I must take my leave of you.”

  Aurora walked to the duke and curtsied. “I hope your travels will be safe, Your Grace.”

  Scanning the room full of onlookers, Hexon opened his mouth to say more, then stepped back and bowed to the room. He turned and skulked out.

  The carriage pulled away a few moments later.

  Poppy sat with Rhys on the settee so close they might have been one being. After their short separation, she seemed unwilling to allow any space between her husband and herself. “At least that’s one less thing to worry about. We’d hardly begun our plan. I suppose he wasn’t really worth the effort.”

  Rhys narrowed his gaze. “Did the three of you run the Duke of Hexon off?”

  “Certainly not.” Aurora gave her brother a wicked grin. “As Poppy said, we’d hardly started when his narrow mind and bad habits had him tripping over his own feet. Besides, I’ll not marry and even if I considered it, it won’t be to anyone Mother brings calling. No offense, Wesley.”

  “None taken.” Wesley grinned and put an arm around Mercy’s waist.

  Shaking his head, Rhys sighed. “Is mother in a bad temper over the situation.”

  Aurora took up the metal statue that had nearly been used as a weapon. She seemed to consider the weight and put it down again. “Surprisingly not. Mother was just as disgusted by Hexon’s display as the rest of us.”

  The door opened revealing Helen, Miss Stein, and Malcolm. “I beg your pardon,” Helen said. “I didn’t realize you had more company, my lady.”

  They stepped back intending for she and Miss Stein to leave.

  Malcolm walked in smiling. His entire attitude different from when he first arrived.

  Aurora rushed to the ladies. “Not at all. Come and join us. I want Miss Stein to meet the rest of my friends and then since the weather is fine, I thought we might collect the girls and go for a walk.”

  Malcolm shook hands with Nick and Rhys. “Shall I go find Mr. Arafa for the walk?”

  “Is Geb here?” Nick asked.

  Garrett nodded. “Arrived two days ago.”

  “This is more house party than school, Rora.” Rhys laughed, but stood and crossed to meet Miss Stein.

  Once introductions and the finding of the rest of the party was completed, they strode into the garden and headed up the hill toward the stone circle.

  Wilhelmina and Petra ran ahead while Faith, a great hater of walking, lagged behind with Nick by her side. The others made their way in a large group within reach of the girls and chatted about the plans for the school.

  Garrett let his gait slow so that there was distance between the larger group and the lagging Duke and Duchess of Breckenridge. He wasn’t certain she’d want to speak to him, but his heart jolted when Aurora slowed enough to walk beside him. It took a force of will to keep from holding her hand so he clasped his behind his back. “It seems Wesley is very keen on this venture of yours. It was good of you to include him.”

  Rushing up to keep the girls on track, Wesley made some comment that caused a bout of giggling.

  “It has all worked out.” Aurora clasped her hands to her elbows in front of her. “I didn’t know you planned to let Thwackmore, Garrett. Are you in financial difficulty?”

  “I am not, but it seems such a waste to leave the place empty. I rarely used it when it was my only country holding. Now I have two others that will need my attention. It seems a wise course to keep the Corwin holding for use, and let out the baronetcies until I may have a son to inherit.”

  A sorrow crept into her watery eyes. “You will have to marry then.”

  “Of course. I have responsibilities, Rora. You must realize.” He wanted to grab her up and tell her he would only ever love her and beg her to marry him.

  “Yes.” She pulled her shoulders back. “Of course, you do. I don’t know why I said that.”

  There was that mask she wore so well, tightly holding back her emotions. But he had seen those bonds break when he held her in his arms. If he lived ten lifetimes, he would never forget the passion he’d seen inside his Aurora.

  Time for a change of subject, lest she run away. “What did you do to Renshaw. He’s practically simpering with congeniality.”

  Indeed, Malcolm was laughing and joking with the others as if he’d never been in a bad temper or demanded the notion of the school be put aside.

  Aurora shrugged. “It seemed he’d not wanted to court me any more than I wanted to be courted. I gave him leave to search for his family treasure. If it is not cataloged with the possessions of the house, he has my permission to keep whatever he finds for his family. It seems this has made him content.”

  “He’s an unusual man.” Garrett couldn’t help his relief at one less suitor to worry over.

  They walked in silence for a few minutes. The others had nearly reached the stones while Nick and Faith were far behind, leaving the two of them virtually alone.

  Aurora cleared her throat and looked at him. “I don’t want you to think your leaving is wanted.”

  Heart in his throat, he said, “I will see you when you return to London. I shall call if you will inform me when you arrive.”

  “We all return in a fortnight.” Her throat bobbed in several swallows. “I hope you will come to call. I shall miss you. You probably think me a fool.”

  “I am deeply touched that you might miss my presence when you have so many friends around you, Rora. You may call on me any time.” He wished with all his heart, she would call on him to be her company, but he knew full well, she would not.

  The girls squealed with delight as they ran around the ancient ring of stones.

  “Spirited girls,” Aurora said grinning.

  “Much like you were. Why do you suppose people have children if they don’t want them to act like children?” Garrett wondered aloud, not expecting an answer.

  “For the same reason you must marry.” There was a bitterness in her voice he’d never heard before.

  Touching her arm, he halted her then waited for Nick and Faith to pass them by.

  Faith did a poor job of hiding a grin.

  Anger and disappointment swam inside him. “Aurora, my duty aside, any child of mine will be loved.” He reined in the anger, but his frustration couldn’t be harnessed completely. “I would marry you. I long to marry you. It is you who have proclaimed it impossible. I declared my love long before last night. You know my wishes and I respect yours. Please don’t blame me for my obligations to my title and family. It isn’t fair.”

  Chapter 16

  It wasn’t fair. He was right. Still, Aurora bit her lip to keep her emotions tightly reined. “You’re right. I set the standard and have no right for rancor. I wish you only happiness, Garrett.”

  They continued forward to join the group.

  “Thank you, Rora.” There was strain in his voice and she had put it there.

  It pained her, but the idea of binding herself to another man for the rest of his life, was too terrifying. “I’m certain whoever you marry will be a fine lady and we shall all be good friends.”

  Suddenly nauseous, she rushed forward and joined the others, ending the conversation.r />
  “How long have these stone stood here?” Petra pressed her hand to a stone, her large brown eyes full of wonder and curiosity.

  Wesley sat cross legged on a humped bit of earth. “Some say thousands of years.”

  Wilhelmina leaned against a tall stone. “I hardly think that could be possible.”

  “Why not?” Miss Stein asked.

  “I don’t see how such primitive people could have organized and moved such great stones.” The dark-haired twin seemed very sure of herself.

  Esther Stein smiled and sat on the ground. Her dark blue day dress fluffed out around her legs. “I see your point, Miss Wilhelmina, but England’s best scientists believe these stones date perhaps as much as four thousand years ago. No one knows how the people of that time might have moved such mammoth stones. It is intriguing, don’t you think?”

  Staring around her, Wilhelmina seemed to give the notion her full attention before sitting with her eyes narrowed in concentration. “I cannot fathom it.”

  Petra sat beside her sister. “What could they have meant to do with these circles?”

  “Another good question, Miss Petra.” Miss Stein was in her element. “Perhaps prayer or ritual. We don’t know for certain.”

  “There are some Roman ruins down the hill. Not quite so old, but perhaps fifteen hundred years old or more.” Wesley pointed in the direction of the ruins.

  Both twins sprang up. “It is like an archaeological dig, Mina,” Petra said with great excitement.

  The girls ran down the hill skirts flying out behind them.

  Standing, Wesley laughed. “I shall go and make certain they don’t actually begin digging.”

  “They are quite bright.” Mercy sat near Miss Stein.

  “I agree. Both girls are full of interesting questions.” Miss Stein pushed her hair behind her ear where several strands had escaped in the breeze.

  Faith plopped down and sighed as if the walk had nearly done her in. “I hate to walk.”

  Giggling, Mercy sat as well. “Miss Stein, may we call you Esther when the children are not in hearing. We are a very informal group as long as none of our parents are present. Since the dowager remained at the house, it would be good to feel more intimate.”

  “I would be flattered, my lady.” Miss Stein blushed and looked extremely pretty doing so.

  “Mercy,” she corrected.

  Geb leaned on one of the stones then straightened and placed a palm against the hard surface. “They have a kind of life to them, do they not.”

  “I think so too.” Mercy nodded. “I find the phenomenon as interesting as the girls. It’s fascinating to think who might have erected these, and for what.”

  Helen found a fallen stone and sat on it as if she were still in the parlor. Her back was straight and she crossed her hands over a knee. “There is speculation that these were holy places for the Druids. Of course, little is known about them.”

  “It would be an interesting study,” Geb thought out loud. His gaze shifted to Helen.

  “Indeed.” Helen’s cheeks pinkened but she changed the subject. “There are a great many mysteries in the world that could make for a lifetime of study.”

  “I think I would enjoy a lifetime of study.” Geb nodded to the group, cast his gaze on Helen again then walked off toward the girls and Wesley.

  Esther stood. “I shall make certain the girls are not driving his lordship mad.”

  Rubbing her foot, Faith said, “I like her a lot. She gave them only enough information to pique their curiosity. Rather brilliant.”

  Aurora had noted the same thing. “I think this will work out quite well. Helen, you must let me know if you need more help. I have no idea how many students we shall attract but I think for now we shall be happy with these two despite our intention of waiting a month or so.”

  “I will keep you informed, my... Aurora.” Helen smiled.

  They soon returned to Whickette Park for luncheon and though they were late, had a very good meal with Mother who was in disturbingly fine spirits.

  Aurora went to her room to rest and think. She hated that she might have hurt Garrett, but how was it to be helped?

  The rap at her door of three knocks, a pause, and then a fourth, told her a Wallflower wished to enter.

  “Come in.”

  Faith stepped inside. “I thought we might have a chat.”

  Sitting at the small round table in the window niche, Aurora longed for a long chat but was wary of whatever thoughts had brought Faith to her. “Are you in need of council, or am I?”

  Letting her giggle free, Faith said, “That depends.” She sat and took Aurora’s hand where it lay on the polished wood. “What is going on between you and Garrett?”

  Lying to a Wallflower was impossible. She had over the years occasionally kept her own council, but to lie would only mean Faith would prod further until she had the full truth. “I’m not entirely sure. He has declared himself. I have told him I shall never marry.”

  Eyes wide and golden in the afternoon sunlight streaming through the window, Faith gawked at her. “He told you he loves you?”

  Aurora nodded. “That was his secret. The one that had me so worried after your ball. He told me he has loved me since we were children.”

  “And you could not tell him you returned his feelings?”

  A pang of regret knotted inside Aurora. “No. He is aware that I greatly esteem him, but to profess a love that cannot end happily seemed too cruel.”

  Faith cast her gaze down at the table. “Poor Garrett. How heartbroken he must be.”

  “Do not think me uncaring, Faith.” She allowed her distress into her voice. “I would love him if I could. Of all the men in the world, he is the only one I regret hurting in such a way. I just can’t.”

  Aurora stood and went to the window. She could just view the grove of walnut trees from there. Several people milled around in the garden. From below, she faintly heard Mercy playing pianoforte. The world went on as if nothing was amiss and yet, she was misplaced. Adrift. She gripped her stomach in hopes of stifling the clutching pain.

  Faith’s arms came around her. “Do not fret so, Aurora. If you cannot love him, there is nothing to be done about it. I’m certain you have been kind and Garrett didn’t immediately quit the house, so he must forgive you. In fact, by the way the two of you were talking today, I thought perhaps you had become lovers.”

  Every muscle in Aurora’s body tightened.

  Faith pulled her around to face her. “Have you been lovers?”

  Tears flooded Aurora’s eyes. “In a manner of speaking, I suppose we have.”

  “He didn’t do anything you didn’t wish, did he?” Venom dripped from Faith’s question.

  Aurora shook her head. “No. Of course not. He gave me a gift. I know now that I had been misled by Radcliff, and lovemaking can be a pleasure to be savored.”

  “I am happy for you, Aurora.” Faith smiled, but sorrow filled her eyes. “Still, you don’t wish to think about marriage.”

  Pulling away, Aurora crossed to her bed and gripped the wooden post. “It is one thing to take a lover or two, and quite another to turn one’s life over to a man. I can never imagine I will want to entrust my existence to a man again.”

  “But you may share his bed again?” Faith raised a brow.

  Her feelings and her fears had warred the entire day over this very question. “I don’t know. Garrett is kind and wonderful, but he is a duke and will have to marry. When he does, whoever his bride is will become a part of our lives. It shall be far too awkward as it is. An ongoing dalliance would only make things worse.”

  “Hmm. I see your point.” Faith took Aurora’s hand and led her back to the table where they both sat. “I am happy that you have found some pleasure with a man. Perhaps now, you can let go of the other memories that haunt you so. I know you can never forget. I cannot, and those things were not done to me. However, perhaps this is a welcomed step toward you letting joy back into your lif
e, Aurora.”

  Garrett’s dark-honey eyes filled her vision. He had given her joy and more. She’d trusted him. It was more than she’d ever hoped for. “Perhaps. Time will tell, Faith.”

  Dinner was lively. There were more ladies than gentlemen, but that didn’t harm the enjoyment. Petra and Wilhelmina were full of energy, though well mannered.

  They spoke of little else but the standing stones.

  Wesley said, “Our students convinced me to write a letter to the Royal Scientific Society to obtain the papers currently available regarding the stones around England. I have no idea what will be turned up, but I think it a fascinating project for the young ladies.”

  “Interesting.” Helen sipped her soup.

  A deep frown marred Wesley’s handsome face. “I hope I haven’t overstepped, madam. I only meant to help.”

  “Not at all, my lord. I am only intrigued that you have the connections that might produce those papers and get them sent here.”

  Geb put his spoon aside. “I find this entire thing most interesting. This school will be a model for how to truly educate.”

  “Because the ladies may study some archeology?” Esther Stein asked, her voice taking a sterner tone.

  Waving off her censure, Geb said. “I am most certain you will teach your students all the courses that will make them as bright and smart as their contemporaries. But to also feed the imagination is a rare treat. Curiosity breeds dreams and dreams innovation. I predict great things to come from a new generation of young women.”

  Satisfied, Esther’s mouth drew up in a lovely smile. “I see your point, Mr. Arafa.”

  “We shall do our best to make that a reality.” Helen drew a deep breath and kept her gaze from meeting Geb’s. “I deeply hope to change the way women see themselves, even if it is one girl at a time.”

  Esther nodded. “We cannot change an entire culture of men who think women simple and ornamental, but if we can teach women to believe themselves more, then one day the world will have to see the same thing.”

  “Present company excepted.” Nick laughed. “My exposure to the Wallflowers of West Lane has cured me of any notions that women are inferior to men.”