Deviant Fixation

by Valencia Carmelita

  When I had moved to Australia, the first thing Naheed's children did was shredding my childhood teddy bear. It was the second worst day of my life after having lost my mother.

  I hiccup a sob of despair in remembrance and immediately pull my face away from the teddy. The fur on its head darkened from the wetness of my tears. I really missed her terribly, her hugs, her laughter, her consoling whispers.

  It wasn't endurable the misery I was feeling and I needed to get out for fresh air. I turn towards the shelf to replace the teddy back. My body freezes as I find a pair of familiar penetrating blue eyes staring at me a few feet away.

  He's standing there, expression darkened with that distinct emotion I had first glimpsed of him last week in the kitchen. Instantly I felt myself grow cold in fear.

  The knuckles of his hands shown paler then the rest of his skin as he grasped tightly onto a hanger with a purple little girls dress. His hands appeared about ready to snap the hanger into pieces.

  Yet his eyes remain focused on mine, with brows furrowed in slight perplexity. And I didn't understand why I am rooted there on the spot.

  I should have dispersed away from him the second I saw him. But instead with my own tear streaked condition, I am left transfixed by his gaze. Glued in placed by his unnerving attention.

  Minutes pass by and we continue staring at eachother.

  I hadn't realized till now how ensnaring his presence could actually get when he wasn't threatening me. Yet I did feel threatened even now, but it was a different kind of threat. A threat in its most peculiar form that kept me under his scrutiny on my own accord.

  Besides the unknown mixture of turbulence in his eyes, he seemed vehemently lost. As if he was searching for a piece of him, he lost in me. And that notion of mine vanishes in the blink of a second, as soon as Ilona's shrill voice pierces the thickened atmosphere.

  "Vladdy! Did you find your niece a frock already ?!" She saunters in through the wide entrance of the children's section. "I found myself 10 gowns I'd like to wear at your cousins wedding!"

  Immediately he regains his composure as I wipe quickly at my tear stained face. She spots him and then me, her eyes sharpen into daggers.

  Traipsing over besides him, she asks. "What's going on here ? Did the Muslim bitch try something foolish again?"

  I suppress the urge to roll my eyes at her.

  Evading her question, he shoots me a familiar glare full of animosity and then makes a brisk departure.

  Now that was strange.... A moment ago he wasn't even staring at me with so much hatred and disgust.

  "What did you do ?" Ilona glowers at me accusingly.

  Ignoring her, I place the teddy bear back up on the shelf. I wasn't in the mood for more insults and humiliations in one day. Residing in the same household as her malicious boyfriend was humiliation enough for me as is.

  "You better stay away from him!" She warns as I walk out of the children's section.

  Trust me, you evil witch, I don't even want to be 10 feet within his presence.

  ◆◆◆

  On the ride back, I couldn't shake away from my mind the strange encounter I had with the demon back in the mall.

  "Ughh I have to use the bathroom!!" Bev whines next to me.

  Katie rolls her eyes. "You shouldn't have drank so much slurpees!"

  "We aren't out of the city yet, we could stop at Grigori's flat." Bev suggests. "I don't want to hold it in for two more hours!"

  They call the demon for his permission which he obliges. His Lamborghini zooms past us as our limo takes a different route.

  In five minutes, the limo parks infront of a modern high rise sky scraper. Etched over the entrance of the building reads Molotov Towers with two doormen standing.

  "Try not to take long." Huxley mutters absentmindedly. Bev has me accompany her instead of Katie who was busy texting someone on her phone.

  No later than a couple of minutes, the two of us enter into a a vast luxury flat. The windows are ceiling to floor, revealing the glimmering skyscrapers ahead. There is an indoor jacuzzi and a balcony swimming pool.

  "I texted Grigori but he hasn't replied back and it doesn't look like he's here." Bev states blankly. "You can wait here will I go freshen up , Sanam."

  She leaves me in the lounge. I take a seat while staring at the modern artsy objects placed on single lined shelves. The leather couches were in odd forms of modern art, scattered about.

  A small laptop is placed upon the coffee table before me, but my eyes catch sight of something troubling. Right next to the laptop is a stack of blank and crisp sheets of what appears as resume paper. And not just any resume paper.

  Reaching out, I grab one in my hand. I couldn't believe my mind. This was the exact same sheet of paper and same shade as the fortune cookie note. Sudden dread creeps goosebumps upon my skin as I leap to my feet from the couch.

  No! This cannot be happening! Was it Grigori behind that note ?! Or was it Bev?!

  Horrified, I toss the paper back on the coffee table. Right as I turn to flee out, a strong hand clamps over my mouth from the back.

  Chapter 17

  "Don't scream when I remove my hand and let me explain why I wrote that note."

  My eyes widen in alarmed recognition of the voice belonging to none other than Grigori.

  So he was the author behind that ominous note!

  I want to scream for help. Bev is a few doors down the hall.

  Was she also in on it ?

  I fear what he might do next. For all I know, he might just end up splintering my neck right then and there. That is if he possesses similar skills as that demon cousin of his.

  "Don't scream, I wrote that note for your safety." Grigori continues with underlined discretion.

  My brows knit in confusion. Safety ???

  He seemed unprepared to harm me in the least bit judging from his careful tone of words. This only leads me to the haste conclusion that Bev is unaware.

  I nod my head in agreement and he releases me from his grasp. I whirl around to pin him with a glare. He's dressed casually in sweat pants and a t-shirt when I've only ever glimpsed him In a suit and tie.

  "Why?" I demand quietly.

  He scratches at the back of his head nervously, looking anywhere but me. "I thought I could keep you from further danger but seeing where you are now..that was a total fail."

  I squint in puzzlement. "What do you mean ?"

  "Look.." He begins, vision finally adjusting on me. "That day of the pageant, you shouldn't have gotten involved. Without the girls knowing, Serge and I were undercover. We would have easily taken down Arielle's abductor. But then you came along and you just messed with the wrong crowd. I figured you were some random girl trying to help until Bev informed us that Rachael was attending your wedding. Without getting into further detail, I had to warn you to watch out and stay away from Rachael."

  "But why am I in danger? I still don't get it?" I reprise.

  "You are." He groans in exasperation. " you've intercepted twice in the abduction of Rachael's children which makes you a target for Pierre Doucette and his men. And not only that, but Vladimir will also execute you!"

  "W-what?!" I stare at him, mortified by this revelation.

  "Yes" He confirms solemnly. "but now it's too late, you're involved with the Nielsens. Let's say if you leave soon, the Doucette mafia can get ahold of you easily. They are just as powerful as the Molotovs. But if you stay then Vladimir will eventually kill you and Rachael won't be able to prevent him. She wields much less power over him than you think and honestly I'm surprised you're still alive for this long."

  Mind numbing terror seeps through out my body. "W-why d-does your cousin w-want to k-kill me ?"

  Grigori exhales. "He despises you and your kind to say the least, as to why ? something I can't go into further detail. I know how crazy he can get, we all know this about him. He's not really normal like the rest of us, he's seen too much shįt at a very young age and that's all I'm hinting a
t."

  "So he kills Muslims for being Muslims?" My breathing freezes in horror.

  "No.." He shakes his head in decline. " but he most likely will kill you for being one and having come this close to his family. Which is why I've stated, I'm surprised you're not dead yet."

  "Then what do I do ?" Apprehension overshadows my voice. "Where do I go ?"

  Grigori looks at me with that familiar pity I glimpsed of him days earlier in the foyer. " That I can't help you with, I'm afraid. If only you had taken my note seriously. Rachael can not offer you any source of secure governance when she's dependent upon Vladimir for her own. So now you're at his mercy, which is shocking that he's shown mercy to you..."

  "I think I know why and it's not mercy.." I remark forlornly. "Rachael informed him about my departure in 3 months time.."

  "Ah, so that's why he's allowed you to live." Grigori marvels in wonderment . "but then you'll end up dead once the Doucettes get ahold of you."

  I stare helplessly into his sympathetic eyes. It was beyond obvious he couldn't aide me, no one could besides Allah.

  The sudden approaching sound of Bev's footfalls disrupts the brief quietude.

  "Don't reveal any of this to Bev, I don't want her worrying over something that's out of our hands." Grigori cautions sternly. "She can't help you. And don't discuss this with Rachael either, there is no point."

  I merely offer a dismal nod while suppressing the urge to weep.

  Was there no apparent way out of this mess?

  I should have remained with Imran. I could have escaped in some alternative manner to this nightmarish reality I am stuck in.

  Where would I escape to with Bilal now?

  ◆◆◆

  Through out the next day, I remain in the Nielsens guest room. After the revealing encounter with Grigori, I didn't possess the courage to step out into the corridors and kitchen.

  Rachael and the girls assumed I wanted to be left alone for the day. I was extremely beyond disappointed in Rachael for having kept me in ignorance of the reality. I felt like opening up to her about it, but remembered Grigori's warning. It won't do me any good...it was too late by now. But it pained me greatly for her having kept me ignorant.

  Mrs.Agnelli offered to give me an embroidery lesson during her break from kitchen duties but I politely declined. How can I be carefree of my situation when there was absolutely no way out of the danger I was enmeshed in.

  I felt beyond miserable, and all I could do was toss and turn restlessly upon my bed. I briefly pondered calling Leila, but then reminded myself she was pregnant. I didn't want her fretting over something beyond her control.

  So I might as well just drown myself in my miserable hopelessness till that demon butchers me...

  A knock ensues against the door, jolting me from my desolate thoughts. I glimpse the time on the digital clock against the wall, 12:32am.

  Who could be knocking at my door this late at night ?

  Cautiously, I approach the door and ask. "Who is it ?"

  "It's me..Ilona.."

  My brows knit in swift confusion. What the hell is she doing here ?

  "What do you want ?" I don't suppress the displeasure in my tone.

  "To apologize for my misconduct towards you." Her voice seeps through the door in soft muffles.

  My eyes narrow skeptically. "Why ?"

  "Because I've been such a bįtch to you.." She rasps abruptly.

  Well ofcourse you have!

  I still wasn't sure if I could trust what I was hearing right now. This seemed way out of character for her even if I only met her thrice.

  "May I come in ?" She questions.

  "Look, I'm not in the mood for any tricks.." I trail off with caution. "Please just leave me be, okay? "

  "Oh no no no, it's nothing like that I swear!" She pleads. "It's something important I wish to discuss with you."

  "Like what ?"

  "It's about Vladimir and his hatred for you.." She trails off expectantly. "And I think you'd really want to hear me out on this.."

  Immediately my breathing freezes.

  Did she know something others didn't ?

  "Please believe me, I swear no tricks..." She entreats.

  Should I open this door ?

  Pressing my forehead against the door frame, I listen silently while inwardly debating if I should open the door. After some 30 seconds I hear her shuffling away.

  Right around then I swiftly open the door and peer at her retreating back clad in a skimpy night gown.

  "Wait!" I call after her. She halts and turns around to showcase me a face streaked by tear smudged mascara lines. I'm confounded to see her crying.

  "I'm so terribly sorry!" She proclaims as she trudges towards me in a very dejected manner while sniffling.

  I have no idea what to say to her since I can only look on in bafflement.

  She arrives to a standstill infront of me and what appals me even more is when she flings her arms around me.

  "Forgive me please!" She pleads, voice cracking under the threat of additional tears.

  "Err...I " I am at a loss for words. Is this for real ? Is she serious ?

  She starts sobbing uncontrollably and I feel a mixture of awkward embarrassment flow over me. With uncertainty I reach up and and pat her on her back. "Shhh it's alright..please stop crying.."

  "Does that mean you've forgiven me ?" She stammers while pulling apart to peer down at me. " I didn't mean any of the bad stuff I've said to you! It's all Vladimir's fault !"

  Should I believe her ?

  I study her face silently for a couple of seconds while striving to process her words. She does appear genuinely sorry.

  "Look..it's fine..it's okay.." I reassure her. I wasn't familiar on any other way to calm her down.

  "Can I come in?" She asks timidly. " no one else will understand how much abuse I suffer at Vladimir's hands..."

  "You mean he physically assaults you?" I question sternly.

  She merely looks down at her slipper clad feet and nods. "You saw that day when he slapped me..it's way worse behind closed doors..."

  "Yes I remember, and that's terrible !" I utter with concern before instinctively scanning her bare arms for signs of bruising.

  She notices and quickly adds. " Uh-um- I don't bruise easily!! My beautiful skin has suffered from so much affliction at his vicious hands but yet remains strong. Although my mind is crumbling!"

  She begins sobbing again. "I don't know if I can take it anymore! I'll prematurely age and die if this continues!"

  My heart aches at seeing her in such a broken condition. I'm reminded of my own physical and emotional torment at the hands of Imran.

  Ya'Allah the world is full of monsters and they continue preying upon the weak! Please, who can protect them but you?

  Without realizing it, I begin weeping along with her. "Please don't cry, you're making me cry now..."