Aura

by Rebecca Lynn Talley

  "It'll be like we're sisters or something."

  "I've never had a sister. That sounds fun, but—"

  "You're going off to college in a few months, right? You'll be living on your own away from your parents pretty soon anyway. Why not now?" Erin almost jumped off the bed with excitement.

  "I'll think about it."

  "It'd be so much fun." Erin's cell phone played a jingle. She read the text and threw the phone on the bed. "My mom wants me back home. Probably wants me to fix dinner or something." She rolled her eyes. "Promise me you'll come live with me so you don't have to move. I won't be able to survive without you. Plus, you've worked so hard on the play. You don't want to miss out, right?"

  "Right."

  "And, you'll give Nate another chance? Please?" She made puppy-dog eyes at me then left the house.

  I stood at the window in my bedroom, watching some neighbor kids playing basketball and contemplating what she'd said. I still had the play and graduation—I didn't want to leave.

  And Nate? Even if Erin was right about him, there was still no excuse for what he'd done. No excuse.

  And the whole invisible force holding him—that had to be my overactive imagination. For sure my imagination. Who'd ever heard of something like that?

  Didn't matter, because Nate and I were done.

  Over.

  Smells of garlic and Italian seasonings permeated my room. Feeling a bit better, I made my way down the hall to the kitchen.

  "Just in time for dinner," Mom said with a serving spoon in her hand. "How are you feeling?"

  "Okay."

  After we said grace, I spooned some lasagna on my plate then moved it around with my fork, trying to convince myself to eat it.

  Dad, still wearing a dress shirt and tie, cleared his throat. "We need to talk about something." Here we go.

  "What?" As if I didn't know what was coming.

  "We're moving within the week."

  "You need to pack up your things," Mom said. She sipped her milk.

  I set my fork down hard on the table. "I don't want to move. I want to stay—at least until after the play and graduation. I've worked hard to graduate, and I've worked even harder to be in the play. It isn't fair to rip me away right now."

  "But we need to leave," Dad said.

  "Why?" I pushed my plate away from me.

  "Just trust us."

  "Dad, I'm so tired of hearing that. You tell me to trust you, but you never tell me anything, like why we move so much." Now that the gate was open, I decided to let it all out. "I want to know what's really going on. I refuse to do anything until you tell me." I'd had enough. Of everything.

  "This isn't the time," Mom said with her this-isn't-up-for-discussion tone.

  "Then when will it be time? I hate being treated like a little kid, like you don't trust me to tell me what's going on." They were obviously hiding something and I wanted to know what it was. Now.

  Neither of them said anything. It was useless. They weren't going to tell me anything.

  "Fine." I swallowed back my fear and said, "If you want to move, you can. Erin offered to let me stay with her." I laced my trembling fingers together.

  "That's not acceptable," my dad said, his voice firm.

  I met his eyes. "I've moved every time without complaining. Every time. I've never asked to stay, and I've never even known why we move so much."

  "We move so that I can serve new congregations. You know that," he said.

  I shook my head. "I want to believe you, but I don't."

  "Excuse me?" he said with an edge to his voice.

  I stood and stared at him. "Something is going on, and you refuse to tell me what it is. You keep me in the dark, but I know there's something. I can feel it."

  After a few awkward moments, Dad broke the silence. "Maybe it is time. Maybe she's old enough to handle it." He glanced at Mom.

  Finally.

  In anticipation, I sat back down slowly. Finally, I'd know what was actually going on. I'd never wanted to confront them, figuring they'd tell me eventually. But with the play and graduation on the line, I couldn't wait.

  Dad inhaled deeply as if trying to find enough air to back his words. He tapped his fingers on the table then looked at me. "When I was in college—"

  The doorbell interrupted him.

  Really?

  He rose to answer the door. I sat back against my chair, letting out a long sigh of frustration. Why did someone have to bug us right before I found out the truth? I screamed in my head and slapped my thighs with my hands.

  After a few moments, Dad returned to the dining room. "I need to go over to Mrs. Belnap's. She's ill and asking for me. I'll be back later." He rushed out as if he couldn't get away fast enough.

  "Are you kidding me?" I turned to my mom, but she'd walked over to the sink, her back to me. I got up and moved next to her. "Mom?"

  "Your father—"

  "I want answers. I deserve to know the truth."

  She faced me, her troubled eyes searching mine. "It isn't easy to explain."

  "Try." How can it be so hard to tell me what's going on? Seems pretty easy to me.

  She raked her fingers through her straight hair. "Crystal, you need to trust us."

  Trust them? How about them trusting me?

  "I have trusted you, over and over and over again. But you're keeping something from me, and I want to know what it is."

  Mom's eyes flickered with something. Fear?

  She shifted her weight a few times. Finally, she said in a quiet voice, "It's for your safety."

  "My safety? What does that mean?"

  As if regretting her words, Mom said, "We need to wait for your dad. He'll explain—"

  "I don't want to wait." Usually I didn't keep pushing, but I had to know. Now. "Tell me. Please."

  Mom shook her head. "Not now. We'll wait for your dad and talk about it together. As a family." She walked out of the kitchen, a sign that the conversation was over.

  "Mom!" I yelled after her, but she didn't respond.

  I let out an irritated groan. What are they keeping from me?

  I stood there, staring at the bare wall across the kitchen, when my cell phone rang. My heart rammed into my stomach. I tapped my phone with my thumb, trying to decide if I should answer it while I walked to my bedroom. Finally, I accepted the call.

  "Hi, Nate."

  "Hi, Crystal."

  My nerves twitched at the sound of his voice.

  "Nate, I—"

  "Before you say anything, I'm sorry. I don't know what got into me. I'm so sorry I hurt you. I never meant for that to happen." He sounded sincere. "I feel really bad about how I acted."

  I plopped on my bed and waited for several seconds. Even though it had taken him a day to call, he honestly sounded like he felt bad about everything. I didn't want to be mean by not accepting his apology. "Thank you."

  "Can I come see you?"

  My muscles tightened. "I don't think so." It'd take more than an apology to trust him again.

  "I love you. I made a mistake last night. You aren't going to hold that against me, are you?" He paused. "Can you forgive me?"

  I took a deep breath.

  "I miss you."

  "I—"

  "No, don't say anything. Just think about us. Please, give me—give us—another chance. I promise it will never happen again. I'll see you tomorrow at school."

  I ended the call and lay back on my bed. Maybe Nate was right. Maybe we deserved another chance. A rock tumbled in the pit of my stomach, making me feel anxious, but I pushed the feeling aside.

  I rolled over and twisted some hair between my fingers. Maybe Nate was sincere about never attacking me again. Maybe what happened had even been my fault. Maybe I said or did something that had led him on or made him think . . .

  My head started hammering. I shifted to my back, staring at the ceiling. I'd had such big dreams about prom. I'd envisioned a perfect night, but instead . . . A tear slid down my chee
k. I climbed inside my covers and pulled them over my head, forcing myself to sleep.

  The next morning I woke up and found my favorite pair of jeans. After picking through the pile of clothes on the floor, I decided to wear my green ruffled shirt. I kicked the pile into the closet and shut the door so my mom wouldn't have a breakdown over the mess.

  After I styled my hair, put on some mascara, and brushed my teeth, I grabbed my bag and headed for the door.

  Mom, dressed in jeans and a blue blouse, caught me in the hallway. "Have you had breakfast?"

  We hadn't spoken since last night, when she'd refused to talk to me about moving, because I'd gone to sleep after Nate's call.

  Funny how you can avoid someone even in a small house.

  "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. You can't skip it, especially with

  your late rehearsals. What time will you be home tonight?" She said it as if nothing had happened.

  Not wanting to stir things up again, I answered, "Around 8:30 or 9:00."

  She walked into the kitchen and returned with a blueberry bagel. "At least take this with you."

  "Thanks."

  "See you tonight." She gave me a hug.

  I rushed outside with the bagel hanging out of my mouth and started up the car. I

  didn't want to be late to ceramics. Mrs. Jameson was strict about tardies, and I couldn't afford to get another one, especially if she decided to be extra picky about the time and marked me absent. An unexcused absence would get me kicked out of the play. I didn't need any more reasons to put my part at risk.

  Thankfully, I made it on time. Barely. I suffered through my next class, intro to journalism, and looked forward to eating lunch with Erin.

  I rounded the corner to my locker to find Nate waiting for me. I stiffened, unsure what to do.

  Nate caught sight of me and waved. I approached slowly, telling myself not to freak out.

  He pulled a red rose from behind his back. "For you." He handed it to me.

  I inhaled the sweet scent, the petals tickling my nose. "Thanks."

  "I want you to know how sorry I am. Really. I hope you can forgive me." The words were right, and seemed genuine, yet something gnawed at me, saying all wasn't as it seemed.

  I smiled, not wanting to commit to anything.

  "Can we start over? Forget about what happened?" He reached for my hand, but I didn't reciprocate.

  "I don't know."

  He gazed at me, his eyebrows pulled together. "You aren't afraid of me, are you?"

  "Honestly?"

  He nodded.

  "Yeah, I guess I am." After all, he had attacked me.

  "I told you I was sorry."

  I willed my nerves to settle down.

  "Crystal, I love you. I got carried away because I wanted to show you how much I love you. That's all. I was wrong. I know that now."

  "I don't call that love, Nate."

  "Please, forgive me. Please. I'll do anything to win you back."

  I bit my lip. "Then, give me some time." I opened my locker and set my journalism book inside.

  "That's going to be hard—I want to be around you. You mean everything to me."

  The words came out of his mouth, but there was no meaning behind them.

  "You're the only one for me, Crystal. Forever." He smiled, but it didn't have the same effect it used to. It almost made me sick.

  I grabbed my theater notebook. "I need some time alone to go over some scene notes for rehearsal today."

  "Whatever you need. Can I see you later?" He seemed eager to please me.

  "Rehearsal runs late."

  "Can I call you?"

  I gave a nod then shut my locker door and turned away. As I walked, I had an eerie feeling that someone was watching me. The hall was filled with students, and no one seemed to be looking at me or even noticing me. Was it Alec? Probably not. I hadn't seen him all day.

  But something was off. I could feel it deep in my bones.

  I fumbled through my papers, trying to locate the project notes for my Spanish class. I glanced at the chalkboard and noted the due date. With extra rehearsals, I was struggling to keep up with assignments. And now I was the only one left in class. Awesome.

  "May I help you with something?" Mrs. Rodriquez asked.

  "No, thanks." I hated Spanish with every molecule in my body, but I had to take it to graduate. If I didn't find the notes for my big project, my grade would teeter on the edge of failure.

  "You'd better hurry, or you'll be late for your next class," she said with her Spanish accent. "And don't forget this." She handed me the rose from Nate.

  "Thank you." Students began filing into the classroom, so I scooped up my books, but then dropped the whole load before I made it out. Just what I need. I tried to pick everything up while ducking my head to hide my crimson face. Students giggled, but no one offered to help. Big shock. I finally had everything in my arms, including the wilting rose, so I hurried down the hall toward my locker.

  The bell rang, leaving the halls deserted. I shook my head. Great. I'm late. Can this day get any worse?

  I rounded the corner. Nate stood by his locker, talking to his buddies. Quickly, I stepped backward, plastering myself against the wall. I waited for them to leave because I didn't want to talk to Nate again until I figured out how I felt, but that didn't stop me from eavesdropping.

  "After prom?" one of the guys asked.

  "Excellent. Of course," Nate said, his voice dripping with pride.

  "Yeah?" another guy with a deeper voice said.

  "It was good, man. Real good." Nate's voice was inflated with ego and innuendo.

  Laughter erupted. They slapped hands and congratulated Nate. I blinked back tears.

  How can he lie like that? What a jerk.

  Their voices started to trail off as they walked down the hall. I slid to the ground in a heap, my books falling to the side. Nate was nothing but a liar. A big, huge, enormous liar telling me what I wanted to hear to break me down so he could take what he wanted. I ripped the petals from the rose and threw them on the ground. Then I tossed the stem. I stood and stomped on the petals, crushing them into the floor and wishing I'd never met Nate.

  I rushed out of the building, toward the river, chastising myself for ever believing him.

  What an idiot I am.

  When I reached the river, I picked up a large rock and threw it as hard as I could into the water. I found several other stones, and, imagining one of the large boulders as Nate's head, took my best aim. Missing the boulder by a mile, the stones landed in the water splashing up in a big spout. Kerplunk.

  "Looks like you're expressing some serious anger."

  I whirled around and found Alec staring at me. "What are you doing here?" With the sleeve of my shirt, I wiped my nose.

  "Wondering why you're down here instead of in class."

  "None of your business." I eyed a rock and considered throwing it at him so he'd go away.

  "I want to talk to you."

  I shook my head. "I don't want to talk to you. Or anyone else."

  Alec studied me. "Does this have something to do with your boyfriend?"

  I laughed and then stared up at the cloudless sky. "Boyfriend?"

  "The one that—"

  "Assaulted me and is now telling his buddies he scored with me. That one?"

  Alec said nothing.

  "He's such a liar. All guys are nothing but liars. All they want is one thing. No matter what they say or how sweet they act, it's all about sex." I let out an annoyed sigh. "I thought he was sincere when he apologized but he was only playing me. I'm such an idiot."

  "He's not—"

  "Don't even say it. He was exactly who he's always been. I'm a stupid, trusting . . ." I didn't want to finish my sentence.

  Tentatively, he took a step toward me. "What I told you the other night—"

  "That Nate's possessed by some evil spirit, and that's why he attacked me." I stopped for a second, trying to c
ontrol the roiling emotions inside me. "I don't think so. He's just a regular jerk who's been lying to me and making a fool out of me since day one." I wanted to scream long and loud—let all of my anger and frustration out.

  "I'm not going to argue that Nate is some great guy, but he isn't himself." Alec paused. "And you're in danger."

  I set my hands on my hips. "What's that supposed to mean?"

  He looked at me with his cobalt blue eyes. I scolded myself for noticing.

  "You aren't safe here," he said.

  "From Nate?"

  Alec nodded.

  I held my hands up. "What? Is this your game? You try to get me to trust you so you can attack me too?" I wanted to run as fast as I could and never look back. Alec was like Nate who was like all the rest. I didn't want anything to do with any of them. Ever. Maybe comparing him to Nate was a bit harsh. After all, he'd pretty much saved me after prom, but as far as I knew, he was up to something too. I couldn't trust him either.

  Alec stepped back. "I'm not Nate. And I'm not possessed."

  I narrowed my eyes. "Oh, yeah? If Nate really is possessed, how do I know you're not?"

  "You'll have to trust me." His clear blue eyes searched mine.

  I tore my gaze from his. "Yeah, well, I'm not big in the trust department right now."

  "But, you can trust me."

  "I don't want to talk about this anymore." I turned my back to him so he wouldn't distract me and muddle my thoughts. Water rushed over the boulders in white bubbles as it made its way down river. A few birds chirped in nearby trees, and a horn honked in the distance. I massaged the tension knotted in the back of my neck, trying to figure out what to do.

  "You're in danger and I want to protect you."

  I licked my lips. "From who?"

  "From those who want to destroy you."

  I laughed. He sounded ridiculous. Someone is out to get me? Me? Whatever game he was playing, I was done—totally done. I'd been played for the last time. "I don't—"

  "We're running out of time." Alec stepped closer, so close I could smell the rich, spicy scent of his cologne. "Demons have infiltrated this area, but you can help stop them."

  "Demons? Really." He sounded like he'd stepped out of a TV show. "Am I on some hidden camera show? Is Ashton Kutcher gonna jump out at me or something?"