Fear and Aggression

by Dane Bagley

A loud knock at the door sent chills down Steve’s spine. The three men turned toward the door, and Roloff made his way towards it. When the door opened, Steve’s heart sank.

  The figure in the door was that of a man. This man, however, was grotesque. He was tall and gangly, and his face was menacing. Steve could hear him speak, and he heard Roloff answer, but he could not understand what was spoken. The man walked in, and Steve got a better look. Aspiria, Roloff, and Caryell were the only beings from this planet that Steve had laid eyes on, before. They were all so beautiful, Aspiria extraordinarily so. Steve, though not conscious of it, felt that all from this world must have this characteristic. Now, it was clear to him, that this was not so. Still, the sheer hideousness of this creature—this man before him, caused both discomfort and confusion to swell within him. Aspiria’s external beauty matched perfectly and harmoniously with her internal beauty. Roloff and Caryell gave to him the same impression. This man—this creature—could not be of the same quality as Aspiria. Inside, Steve felt that this man could not be good.

  Steve shuddered as Roloff indicated him, with his arm, to the man who had just entered. The man turned his expression on Steve and glared at him with a look that caused Steve to freeze. Steve could feel every muscle in his body tighten. Steve’s consciousness was elevated, and he understood Roloff as he said, “He has brought Aspiria back to us. She is dead.”

  The man, Seryen, turned back to Roloff, and began to speak. “As I was returning home, I felt the distinct impression that I was to return to your home. I felt that you needed my help. I thought that I might find Aspiria here. I felt her presence. Where is she?”

  “My friend, my dear friend,” Roloff began, “she is in here.” The men made their way slowly so that Seryen could see her body lying on the couch. Steve stayed in place, just turning his head. Caryell made his way back over to the couch. Seryen put his hand on Caryell’s shoulder as they met. Then he reached with his other hand and touched Aspiria’s face.

  “She is still warm; she cannot be dead. Is she like the deer?” Seryen asked with hope in his voice.

  “No. This man tells us that this is not so,” and Roloff, again indicating Steve.

  Seryen, again, looked at Steve. He did not speak, but looked as though he wanted a further explanation. Steve hesitated, and struggled to find the words in this alien tongue. All three of the aliens were looking at him expectantly. “The deer was given a drug to make it sleep. Aspiria was given a drug to take her life. She was given it only moments ago. Her body has not yet had time to cool. I am sorry, it is my fault. She is dead. I am so sorry.” He felt sorrow—intense sorrow.

  Roloff and Caryell nodded slowly. Seryen continued to look in Steve’s direction, but was not looking at him. His strange, irregularly placed eyes seemed to be staring off into space. The silence became awkward. Roloff and Caryell were again looking at Aspiria’s body. Steve’s sorrow, fear, and concern were at first magnified. Then he began to feel some peace creep in, slowly, but distinctly.

  The expression on Seryen’s face began to change. Brightness entered into his countenance, making his face less hideous. Seryen looked down at Aspiria and then away again. He turned toward Roloff, and then spoke quietly, so that only Roloff could hear. Roloff listened intently, and at first showed no expression on his face. After Seryen finished speaking, Roloff looked out in front of him. He was clearly thinking. Caryell was kneeling beside his mother’s body, holding her hand and crying softly.

  Roloff turned toward Seryen again, and nodded slowly and softly. He spoke quietly to Caryell, and Caryell looked up at his father. Then he arose to his feet, and backed a little away from his mother’s body. The men bowed their heads and closed their eyes. Roloff spoke reverently and slowly. It seemed to Steve as if they were praying, and indeed they were. After a few moments, Steve also closed his eyes and bowed his head. He could not remember the last time that he had participated in a prayer.

  Roloff’s voice trailed off, and, after a few moments, Steve reopened his eyes. He saw Seryen standing behind the couch, behind Aspiria’s head, and saw him place his hands on her head. Roloff joined him by his side, and place his hands upon her head. Seryen looked over towards Roloff, and Roloff nodded. Seryen spoke, with his eyes closed, so softly that Steve could only hear the tone of his voice. It sounded so pleasant now. Steve’s feelings were beginning to change towards this alien man. He was hardly aware of his appearance now. The peace that he had begun to feel, moments ago, was increasing and intensifying. He felt no fear. He felt love—God’s love—and the room felt brighter.

  Steve did not close his eyes. He looked over at Caryell, and perceived brightness in his countenance. Caryell did have his eyes closed and his head bowed. Steve looked again at the men, and at the body of Aspiria. He was struck with how beautiful and peaceful she looked. Where was the bruise on her forehead? It had disappeared. Color began to come to her cheeks. He looked up at the men, and they were still in the act of performing this rite or ritual. He looked down again at Aspiria, her chest heaved as though she had taken a breath. Steve was overcome by what he saw. He felt weightless, an intense burning was in his chest, and again shivers ran down his spine.

  He saw the hands removed from her head, and looked up at the men. They were now looking at Aspiria, and from the look on their faces, they, too, could see the changes in her. It seemed to last for minutes, though it was truly just a few seconds that they all stood there, gazing at Aspiria.

  “Mother,” said Caryell with relief and excitement in his voice. Aspiria’s eyes opened, and she looked over at Caryell. She had never looked so beautiful in her life. She smiled as she had never smiled before. Caryell ran and embraced her. She did not lift up from the couch, but looked up at her husband. Tears were in both of their eyes. They did not speak, but continued to gaze at each other. Steve looked over at Seryen, and could see that he, too, was overcome with emotion. Caryell completed the embrace, and moved so that his father could come to her.

  “I’ve missed you so much,” she said gazing into her son’s eyes.

  “You’re alive,” whispered Roloff in a broken voice. Her sweet smile again appeared on her face. Roloff knelt beside her and embraced her with a gentle intensity. The vision of this scene became blurry as Steve’s eyes filled with tears. He wiped them away slowly, and tried to look on. As their embrace ended, Roloff helped Aspiria to a sitting position. He asked her if she was okay, and she acknowledged him with a nod and a smile.

  It was then, that she first observed Steve. He felt sweetness and love as she looked at him, directly in his eyes. “Thank you,” she whispered to him, in English.

  Epilogue