Megan's Marriage

by Annette Broadrick

  “What if I told you I was already thinking about quitting the rodeo? I’ve saved enough to start my horse farm, something I’ve always wanted. We could—”

  “Not we, Travis. Not anymore. I think you should do whatever you want with your life. But don’t include me.”

  “That’s it? You want it over?”

  She nodded.

  He stared at her for a long time, taking in the shadows beneath her eyes, the tightness around her mouth. “I really blew it this time,” he muttered.

  “There should be no hurt feelings. That was our agreement, remember?”

  “No, as a matter of fact, none of this was a part of our agreement. In the first place, I gave you that money. It wasn’t a loan. In the second place, we agreed to stay together for twelve months…remember?” he used her same inflection on the last word. He stared at her but she refused to drop her gaze or respond to him. He spun away from the desk and began to pace, his mind racing furiously for some answers. “The way I see it,” he said after a tense silence, “you still owe me six months as my wife.”

  After a long pause, she slowly nodded. “Technically I suppose you’re right. But I thought since I’ve already paid you that—”

  “Well, you’re wrong. I don’t want the money. I want those six months. I want to prove to you that we can make a go of our marriage, Megan. Will you give me that chance?”

  She frowned. “I don’t understand why you should care.”

  He gave a frustrated sigh. “Well, then I’ll just have to figure out a way to make you understand during the next six months. I figure you owe this to me, Megan.”

  She drummed her fingers on the desk, fiddled with the fountain pen, straightened a stack of papers on her desk and finally sighed. “Do you really think this is necessary?”

  “Yes. Yes, I do.” He watched her intently, praying she wouldn’t see his fear. He couldn’t lose her. Somehow, he had to fight in every way he could to hold on to what they had.

  The silence between them seemed to fill the room with its own tension-filled presence.

  Finally she nodded. “All right. But I’m not going to sleep with you, or make love to you. I realize now that I should never have slept with you in the first place.”

  He folded his arms and looked at her. “Why not?”

  “Because it muddied the water of our agreement. It complicated things. We should have kept it strictly as a business arrangement, without our feelings getting involved.”

  “Are you saying your feelings are involved?” he asked softly.

  “Don’t worry. I can handle my feelings just fine. It was past time I grew up, anyway. You helped me do that as well. Guess I owe you another thanks for that.” Her tone didn’t sound particularly grateful.

  Travis decided he’d gotten as many concessions out of her tonight as he dared push for. He turned toward the door. Just before he opened it, he paused and said, “I’ll be home during those months. Since you got rid of the others, plan on using me. Just give me a list of each day’s work schedule and I’ll do my part.”

  She nodded without speaking and Travis walked out of the room.

  He was so tired he could hardly walk straight and his damn ankle was throbbing like crazy. But he’d bought himself some time—not a hell of a lot, but it was better than having to move out in the next few days.

  Somehow in the next six months he had to figure out a way to convince Megan that they could work all of this out together, if she’d just give them a chance.

  He refused to think about the fact that he might lose her from his life. He couldn’t lose her now. He just couldn’t.

  The winter schedule was slow. As more and more moisture fell, in the form of rain, sleet, and occasional snow, Megan found herself with time on her hands.

  It certainly didn’t help her peace of mind that Travis seemed to be permanently attached to the ranch now. He seldom left the place, giving a list to Butch of anything he needed whenever Butch went into town for supplies.

  Maribeth seemed to be almost completely caught up with school activities. She’d gotten the habit of spending a couple of nights in town most every week, which meant that Megan and Travis spent the evenings alone at the house.

  At first Megan had been nervous around him, waiting for him to argue with her, expecting him to use his charm to convince her to let him become a bigger part of her life.

  He never said anything to her. Of course, there had been one time…

  She sighed, thinking about Valentine’s Day.

  Now there was a. day that she’d largely ignored most of her life. When her folks had been alive, her mother used to tease her dad about not being much of a romantic. One year he’d surprised her with a big heart-shaped box of candy. Her mom had been so touched by the gesture that she had saved the box, and used it for years to store special mementos.

  In the years since her parents had died, there had never been any reason for Megan to give the day more than a passing thought.

  But Travis had remembered.

  Travis hadn’t given her candy. He hadn’t even mentioned the significance of the day to her. But when she went to bed that night she discovered a long-stemmed red rose and a sprig of baby’s breath tied with a ribbon lying on her pillow. A square blue velvet box accompanied the rosebud.

  She stared at the silent offering with uneasiness. What was he up to? Why was he doing this? Didn’t he understand anything?

  Reluctantly she approached the bed and picked up the rose, absently bringing it to her nose. Its gentle fragrance made her sigh. She’d never been given flowers before. Wasn’t a red rose a symbol of love? Was that what he was saying to her?

  Next, she picked up the box and lifted the spring-hinged lid. There, nestled on a bed of white satin was a golden locket on a chain. She’stared at it, fighting back the tears that suddenly filled her eyes.

  She wasn’t a jewelry kind of person. She’d saved her mother’s things for the other two girls who dressed up and went out. The only jewelry she owned was her wedding ring.

  With trembling fingers Megan picked up the locket, only then noticing a small card that read, “I love you, Travis.” She touched a small catch and the locket opened, revealing a carefully inserted snapshot taken on their wedding day. Travis had scooped her up into his arms—she remembered the scene so well—and had twirled her around as though publicly proclaiming her as his prize.

  They’d both been laughing when someone—was it Mollie?—snapped the picture.

  She’d put the locket and card away, unable to say anything to Travis about them, although she kept the rose until it turned brown.

  Meanwhile, he quietly followed the routine she and Butch had, doing the work of both the men he’d hired earlier in the year, and making it look easy.

  Being around him was having an alarming effect on her self-righteous anger. She was beginning to look at what happened from his point of view, which made it more difficult to hold him responsible for her hurt feelings.

  The fact was that he had been concussed when he’d first seen her. He’d admitted to her that it was tough for him to have her see him in such a helpless condition.

  What was particularly galling to Megan was her slow but inevitable realization that it was her jealousy of Kitty Cantrell that had convinced her that Travis couldn’t possibly love her, Megan O’Brien, when someone like Kitty was an integral part of his life.

  Eventually her sense of fairness made her stop and reconsider. Why didn’t she believe that Travis could love her?

  Well, of course it was simple. Just look at her.

  She stood in front of the oval mirror in her bedroom one night, preparing for bed, and caught a glimpse of herself.

  She looked more like a twelve-year-old kid than a grown woman. She could still remember Kitty’s sultry good looks and voluptuous body. How could any man prefer her to Kitty?

  But it was you he married, her mirror image pointed out. Why do you suppose he did that? If he had wanted to marr
y Kitty, he’s had plenty of opportunities to do so. And what if Kitty is in love with him? Does he have any control over her feelings?

  She was reminded of the girls who’d dated him in the past. It was true they had fallen for him, but he had done nothing to encourage them. Had he?

  She shook her head at all the thoughts racing around inside. What was she going to—

  “Megan? There aren’t any towels in here! Can you bring me one?”

  Oh, Lordy, she’d forgotten to replenish the supply of towels in Travis’s bathroom. She was always forgetting some household chore or another. At least she’d remembered to gather up all the towels earlier today to wash them.

  “Hold on!” she called back, hastily wrapping her bathrobe around her, “They’re still downstairs. I’ll bring you some.”

  She paused long enough to slip on her house shoes, then hurried downstairs and emptied the clothes dryer. Carrying the armful of towels she hurried back upstairs and down the hall to Travis’s room.

  She tapped on the door.

  “C’mon in,” he said, his voice muffled.

  She fumbled the doorknob, managed to open it and walked into the room, dropping the pile of towels in one of the chairs. The bathroom door was ajar so she picked up one of the towels and stuck it through the door. “Here you go.”

  Before she could turn away, he opened the door, saying, “Thanks,” as he began to dry himself off, seemingly oblivious to the fact that she still stood there.

  Megan whirled away and headed for the bedroom door.

  “Megan?”

  She froze, unable to look around. “Yes?”

  After a couple of beats, he said, “Thanks.”

  She quickly drew in some air. “No problem. Sorry I forgot to bring them upstairs.”

  He touched her shoulder and she glanced around at him. The towel was now wrapped around his waist and hips. “You don’t have to act as though I’m going to attack you,” he said quietly.

  She turned to face him. “It isn’t that, Travis. It’s just-It’s—” She waved her hand in frustration.

  “What?”

  She shook her head. “I don’t know. This is all so confusing. I don’t know what to do. I feel so—”

  “So-?”

  “Stupid! I mean, I don’t know what’s expected of me. I don’t know anything about being married and in love and I know it’s stupid to be jealous but I can’t help it because I-”

  He caught her by her upper arms and said, “Whoa, wait a minute here. What do you mean you don’t know about—what was it you said—being in love? Would you like to help me understand that remark a little better?”

  Megan couldn’t possibly think with him standing so close to her that way. She was acutely conscious of the heat from his body, the fresh scent of soap he’d just used, and the unsteadiness of his breathing, as though he was just as affected by her. She looked up at his unusual, dark blue eyes and felt a melting sensation sweep over her. “You must know how I feel about you,” she said weakly.

  He caught his breath. “No. Maybe you’d better tell me.”

  She swallowed, then, unable to resist, she laid her palm lightly against his chest, feeling his heart race beneath her hand. Concentrating on the strong line of his jaw, she admitted, “I’ve loved you for a long time, Travis. I just didn’t understand what I was feeling. I had a crush on you in high school, just like half the girls around. I tried to convince myself that what I was feeling was hate, but I—”

  “Oh, Megan!” he groaned, gathering her up into his arms and holding her tightly against him. His towel immediately slithered to the floor. “Oh, baby, if you only knew how I’ve prayed that I’d hear you say that to me someday. I was beginning to give up hope.”

  He began to kiss her—long, drugging kisses that made her go limp. She felt the room tilting before she realized that he had picked her up and.carried her to the bed. Her robe had fallen open, revealing that she wore nothing underneath.

  Travis lowered her to the bed and quickly followed. He couldn’t seem to decide where to touch and caress her next, both his mouth and hands moving restlessly over her.

  “Don’t you understand?” he whispered brokenly. “I never really saw another woman, not in school, and not on the road. You’re the only one I’ve ever wanted.”

  “Oh, Travis.”

  There were no more words between them, not for several, love-filled hours. Sometime in the early morning, predawn, she lay awake, her head resting on his shoulder as he lazily stroked her breast. “Let’s don’t ever fight again, okay?” he whispered. “Not like that. If you want to yell and scream at me, okay, but don’t push me away, babe. Anything but that.”

  Megan felt completely loved at that moment, as well as cherished and treasured. She smiled in the darkness. “I won’t push you away,” she admitted. “But I probably will yell and scream. You have a wonderful knack for provoking me to extreme reactions.”

  “What I can’t understand is why you would ever be jealous of someone like Kitty?”

  She could hear the sincere puzzlement in his voice.

  “She’s beautiful, Travis,” she said pointedly, feeling much more gracious about the other woman’s looks now.

  “But she isn’t you,” he said in such a reasonable tone of voice that she found herself loving him even more than she did before.

  “Travis?”

  “Mmm?”

  “Were you serious about not going out on the circuit this year?”

  “Yes, ma’am, I’m definitely serious about that. I was having too much trouble keeping my mind on what I was doing those last few months.”

  “Can you use the money I gave you to start your horse farm?”

  He was quiet for so long that she thought he wasn’t going to answer her. She’d almost dozed off before he said, “We can decide that together, baby. From now on, we’ll make all our decisions together.”

  Megan drifted into sleep.

  Epilogue

  “Uh, Travis, there’s something I need to discuss with you,” Megan said several weeks later.

  It was April once more. The Texas winter had disappeared and the bluebonnets were in full bloom, their color still rivaled by the brightness of her husband’s compelling eyes.

  Travis was in the barn checking on the new foal. He’d bought the mare knowing she was due in the spring and was quite pleased with the results.

  He stepped out of the stall and joined Megan who was leaning against one of the posts, watching him. He leaned down and gave her a quick kiss. “Sure. What’s up?”

  “It’s almost lunchtime. Why don’t we go eat now?”

  “You’re getting more domestic every day,” he teased, dropping his arm around her shoulder and guiding her toward the door. “What are we having?”

  She grinned. “Don’t laugh at me. At least I’m trying. It’s one of Mollie’s recipes she left with me during spring break. I’m actually discovering I’m having fun experimenting.”

  They were halfway through lunch before Travis said, “So, what is it you need to discuss with me? Is it your herd? Do you need more help? What?”

  “The herd is fine, the extra hands are a godsend now that Butch is retiring, and yes, I think maybe we are going to need to hire a housekeeper.”

  “Ah. So you aren’t enjoying being domestic as much as I thought.”

  “Well, it’s not that, exactly. You remember when we agreed to discuss everything together before we made any decisions?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “Well, I’m afraid we’re going to both have to accept that we can’t always be in that much control.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “I’m pregnant.”

  She hadn’t meant to blurt it out that way. She’d wanted to break it to him slowly, gently. She’d wanted to be sure that he truly wanted to have a family and that he wanted to start one now. But all of that was a little behind times now.

  “Pregnant?” he repeated hoarsely befor
e a smirky grin appeared on his face. “No kidding? I mean, you’re sure about that?”

  She nodded. “I bought one of those home kits to make sure, but I already knew. The signs have been too obvious.”

  “When? I mean, when is it due?”

  “November, I think. I’ve got to see a doctor to make sure but I think it will be here in November.”

  Travis’s grin grew wider. He reached for her hand and squeezed it. “Are you okay with the idea? I mean, are you feeling all right? Was this what you wanted?”

  “I don’t know how I feel. I guess I just never gave it much thought. We certainly never did anything to prevent it!”

  His smile was very knowing. “I’m well aware of that.”

  “You mean you did it on purpose?”

  He shrugged, all innocence. “Who, me? Hey, I’m just a country boy. What do I know about—Ow!” he said, laughing, as she quickly moved around the table and punched him on the arm.

  “You wanted me to get pregnant, you sneak!” she exclaimed, laughing as he pulled her down into his lap.

  The kiss he gave her was filled with love and reassurance and a great deal of longing. When their lips finally parted, both of them were breathing erratically. “Here I’ve been…wondering how to…break the news, afraid you wouldn’t…want a baby this soon,” she admitted between breaths.

  He sobered, his eyes filled with love as he studied her beloved face. “I can’t think of anything that would please me more than for us to start our family now. I’ll admit that I hoped you’d get pregnant sooner or later, but I figured that the law of nature would catch up with us eventually, so I wasn’t giving it much thought.” He hugged her to him. “And yes, this means that we are definitely going to get you a housekeeper. You’re going to have to cut back on the heavy work, at least.”