Leveled (Blue Bay Crew)

by Cathryn Fox

  The last two weeks flew by in a blur. I finally finished the deck, Summer and Sean are back in their cottage with their new baby, and I’ve moved on to helping Ryan with another roofing project. Even though I’m no longer working on Kylee’s place, it hasn’t kept me away from her. We’ve fallen into a routine of working on the shop to get it up and ready, watching all these old movies she loves, slipping into bed together every night, and more importantly, waking up in each other’s arms every morning. We’ve gone from calling each other boy and girl in bed to Jamie and Kylee, and when she uses my name and I use hers, it’s easy to forget we’re playing roles.

  Also over the last two weeks, tourists have begun trickling in, and thankfully, I’ve not seen any more activity at the Jackinoff cottage. Kylee, however, is still receiving phone calls from her dad, and on days when she’s not in her spare bedroom making clothes or on the beach sketching in her book, she sometimes disappears for hours. I still have no idea where she goes, and she’s still not supplying the information. Even though we’ve grown closer, closer than I have to any other woman, I guess we still have secrets.

  I take off my ball cap and run my hand over my hair after a hot day on the roof. I pull open the back screen door to Kylee’s cottage and when I find her in the kitchen humming as she tosses together a salad, my cock thickens.

  “How was your day?” I ask and lean against the doorjamb, just wanting to watch her.

  She turns, and her smile widens when she sees me. “It was good. I got a lot of work done, oh, and look at these.” She dries her hands on the tea towel and hold up her sketchbook. I love when she’s happy like this.

  “You have been busy,” I say, loving the normalcy in our routine, maybe a little too much.

  “How was your day? Did the last of your equipment arrive for the shop?”

  I nod. “Yeah, we should be able to meet our grand opening deadline next Monday.”

  She claps her hands together and squeals, and my heart flips. The way she supports me and is so happy to see me finally get my shop up and running is a total mind fuck.

  “Need help with that?” I ask and point to the salad.

  She frowns. “Did you forget we’re going to Summer and Sean’s for the barbecue tonight?”

  “Uh, yeah, I guess I did. Actually I didn’t know they asked you. I thought they were just having the guys over.”

  “Apparently not. Summer called me last week. She told me Sean asked you.”

  Unease moves through me. Does Sean know what I’m up to with Kylee? Is he inviting all the guys over or just me to remind me of past mistakes? He knows how it turned out for me last time and why I now have my motto: Don’t get involved with pampered girls who spend their summers in Blue Bay. Or is Summer up to something else? I know how she and Gram are always butting into our business and trying to get all the guys hitched.

  “Do they know about us?” I ask Kylee.

  “Jamie, I’ve not said anything but your truck is parked in my driveway every night. How could they not?”

  “Shit, you’re right,” I say under my breath, and Kylee glances down, averting her eyes. Fuck, now I’ve hurt her feelings. “It’s not . . . I just. I don’t want anyone getting the wrong idea.”

  That I might love her. That she might destroy me.

  “I know,” she says quietly, then lifts her head, her smile forced. “You’d better get showered, we’re supposed to be there in ten minutes. Oh, and Gram stopped by today.”

  “Yeah, why?”

  “Last time I was at Sunday dinner, we started talking about you guys as kids. She told me she had a special photo album for each of you guys.”

  “Oh, yeah? I didn’t know that.”

  “Anyway, she brought it over. I haven’t looked though it yet. I wanted to do it with you.”

  “Because you need me present when you laugh at all the stupid things I’ve done?”

  “Of course,” she says breezily, her lips quirking. “It’s no fun laughing at you if you’re not here to see me do it.”

  I cross the room, step up to her, and drop a kiss onto her mouth, but then something else occurs to me. I push her hair from her face and her look is warm, dreamy as she gazes up at me.

  “So I guess Gram knows where I’ve been spending my nights, too. Otherwise she wouldn’t have brought my album.”

  She nods. “I think everyone in town knows, Jamie.”

  “I guess it’s a good thing your dad is in Atlanta then, huh?”

  “Yeah,” she says quietly, and frowns, like the mention of her father has triggered an unpleasant memory.

  Wanting to see her smile again, I say, “Okay, give me five minutes to shower.” I tug off my sweaty T-shirt and her hot gaze races over me. “Or maybe we could take ten minutes and you could join me.”

  “If I join you, we’ll never get to Summer’s, and I don’t want to be late the first time she invites me to dinner.” She points to the hall. “Go and I’ll stay here and try not to think about how hot you look without a shirt on.”

  I hurry to the shower and hope it wasn’t just me and Kylee invited to the barbecue. I’m so not in a mood to get lectured by my big brother. I rinse off quickly, grab clean jeans and T-shirt from the basket of laundry Kylee did, and meet her in the kitchen.

  “All set?” she asks, having changed from her shorts to a sexy summer dress that hugs her curves and teases my cock.

  “You look hot,” I say. “You sure you don’t just want to stay here and let me get you out of that dress?”

  “No, I’m not sure, I would love nothing more than to get naked with you, but I don’t want to leave Summer hanging either, so let’s go.” She scoops up the salad and I follow her out. We head a few doors down, and when I reach Sean’s place and realize we’re the only ones who’ve been invited, I get a lump in my throat.

  “Hey bro,” I say and step up to Sean as he tosses steaks onto the grill. “Need any help?”

  “Hey, you two.” He turns to Kylee. “Summer is inside changing the baby. Just go on in. She’s expecting you.” He looks back at me. “You’re not getting near this grill. Just grab us a couple beers.”

  “Why does nobody think I can cook?” I ask

  Kylee hovers at the door and listens for a second. “Are you forgetting the time you nearly set the house on fire when you decided to roast a marshmallow over a candle?” Sean asks.

  “I was nine,” I say. “I’ve been living on my own for a long time now. I can cook. I just don’t like to.”

  “I’ll believe it when I see it,” he says laughing.

  I follow Kylee inside and take the salad from her. I place it in the fridge and grab two beers. Kylee makes her way to the sofa, where Summer is just finishing with Devon. Scout jumps from her bed, her tail wagging madly when she sees Kylee coming her way.

  Yeah, I get it girl. My tail wags when I see Kylee coming too.

  “I’m so glad you two could come,” Summer says. “I need the adult company.”

  Kylee smiles. “Have you been getting any sleep?”

  “Not a whole lot.”

  I leave the girls to talk and step back outside. I twist the caps off the beers and hand one to my brother. He closes the grill and we both plop down into the Adirondack chairs he built.

  “How’s the roof coming?” he asks, starting with the small talk, but soon enough he’ll get to the real question, like what the fuck do I think I’m doing with Kylee.

  “Good, no problems at all.”

  “How’s the shop?”

  “We’re going to make our opening deadline.” I hold my beer up and he clicks his bottle with mine.

  “We’re?”

  “Yeah.” I gesture with a nod behind me. “Kylee has been helping me.”

  He opens his mouth like he wants to say something but Summer and Kylee, with Devon in her arms, along with Scout, make an appearance.

  “How long for the steaks?” Summer asks as she drops a kiss onto her husband’s mouth. “I’m starving.”
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  “A few more minutes.”

  Kylee turns to me. “Want to hold your nephew?”

  “I . . . Jesus . . .”

  “No swearing around the baby,” Sean says, and that warning coming from the man with the foulest mouth of us all leaves me shaking my head. Having a family has changed him so much—for the better.

  “Here, don’t be afraid,” Kylee says.

  I crook my arms for her to place Devon into them. I hold my little nephew, and his fingers wrap around my thumb. “Hey little dude,” I say. “I’m your uncle Jamie, and you and me, well, I’m going to teach you all kinds of things.”

  “Over my dead body,” Sean says, grinning.

  “Don’t worry. We can have our own secrets,” I say and wink at him. He smiles back. “Shit . . . I mean, ah, did you guys see that?” This no-swearing thing is going to take some effort.

  “See what?” Summer asks.

  “He smiled at me.”

  “It’s gas, Jamie,” Sean explains.

  I angle my head, look over the cute bald dude in my arms. My heart pinches a bit as I fall hopelessly in love with him. “Ignore him,” I say to Devon. “The two of us, we’re going to get in all kinds of trouble together.” I glance up and when I see how still Kylee has become, the way her eyes are saucer-big as I rock Devon in my arms, I ask, “Want to hold him?”

  “Sure.” She sits next to me, and I hand him over. She brings him to her shoulder like a natural and rocks him. In no time at all, heavy lashes fall over green eyes and he goes to sleep.

  “That’s the life,” I say. “Rocked to sleep by a pretty girl.”

  Summer stands to take the baby from Kylee. “Here, let me put him to bed, and then we can eat.”

  A few minutes later we’re all seated at the picnic table, and the sun dips lower in the sky. The sounds of children on the beach fade as they head back home after a busy day, and waves crash gently on the shore. I kick back and enjoy the meal my brother and sister-in-law prepared for us.

  “How are you enjoying Blue Bay?” Summer asks Kylee.

  She frowns. “I love it here.”

  “Why the frown?” Summer asks.

  “I guess because I’m not looking forward to leaving at the end of the summer.” Her glance flickers to mine, and my heart thuds. Is it possible she wants to stay—with me? Do I dare hope? She shrugs and tosses her hands up in the air. “But I have to get back to reality sooner or later, right?”

  I want to tell her, reality is overrated, but I don’t. I also quickly squelch the hope rising up in me and dig into my steak.

  For the rest of the meal, we talk about work, the baby, and my shop, keeping the conversation light and easy. By the time we clear the dishes and grab another beer, the girls go inside to tend to Devon and I walk back outside with Sean. When the hell is he going to start lecturing me? The wait is killer.

  “Come on,” he says and we move further down the beach, away from the house, where our conversation can be private. Sean drops to the warm sand, and I follow him down. We lay on our backs and stare up at the stars, like we did so many times in our youth. Just Sean and me. Best buds. Back then I never kept secrets from him.

  “How long have you loved her?” he finally asks, breaking the quiet around us.

  I roll to my side and prop up on my elbow. “Who says I love her?”

  “Give me a fucking break, Jamie. I know you better than anyone.”

  I exhale slowly, and Sean turns toward me, mimicking my positions.

  “That obvious, huh?”

  He nods. “Yeah.”

  “Why did you put me on her deck job?”

  “Summer thought I should. I wasn’t sure at first, but I trust that my wife knows what she’s doing.”

  I fall back and stare at the sky. “She’s a rich girl looking for fun. I tried to keep my distance, Sean. I really did. But I’m fucking weak.”

  “You’re not weak, Jamie. You’re one of the toughest fucking guys I know. Christ, you just about took down four guys on your own.”

  I think back to the day the Jackinoff boys beat the crap out of me. “I should have walked away from Kylee.”

  “And now you can’t.”

  “No, but soon enough she’ll be walking away from me and Blue Bay.”

  “If you love her so much, why don’t you give her a reason to stay?”

  I angle my head to see my brother, the smartest guy I know, who I love with all my heart. “What’s here for her, Sean?”

  Green eyes lock on mine. “You.”

  We both go quiet for a long time as I mull that over. “I can’t ask her to give up her career, something she’s worked so hard for.”

  “There’s work here for her and there are big law firms in Hope Falls.”

  Hope Falls. That’s where she’s been going when she disappears for hours. I only know because she always has a fresh Starbucks coffee cup in her car cup holder when she returns. What the hell could she be doing in Hope Falls? Maybe she is thinking about staying and is there looking for work. Or maybe I’m just grasping at straws.

  “Who says it’s even what she wants?” I ask.

  “I do,” Sean replies. “I see the way you two look at each other.” A pause and then, “Or she could hang her own shingle here on the beach, like Summer did. Then again, from the way she talks about law, it sounds like she hates it.”

  “I know.” My mind races back to Indigo Blue Boutique. She could definitely find work there, or better yet . . . “I’m pretty sure her father would disown her if she stayed here. He’s a controlling prick.”

  Sean scoffs. “When have you ever been afraid of a controlling prick?”

  “Never.”

  “That’s what I thought.”

  “So what are you saying, Sean? You think this thing between me and Kylee—”

  “Has you all fucked up, and you need to do something before it’s too late.”

  “What the hell am I supposed to do?”

  “You’re a smart guy and know her better than I do. Figure it out.”

  I sit up and finish my beer. “We’d better get back.”

  Sean climbs to his feet and we make our way back to the cottage. Summer is pretty tired out, and I reach for Kylee, and since these two know all about us, I pull her into my arms, unable to take another second without feeling her beside me. At first she seems surprised by my public display of affection, then she softens against me.

  I nod toward the door. “We should get going, let these two get some sleep.”

  “Okay,” she says quietly and we say our goodbyes. We walk along the beach on our way back to Kylee’s place, and once we’re inside, we settle ourselves on the sofa.

  I yawn, but Kylee jabs me. “Hey, don’t go to sleep on me. I’ve been dying to look at your photo album.”

  I moan. “Do we have to? Wouldn’t you rather get naked and let me slide into you?” Her body quivers and her lids go heavy.

  “I want that, but first pictures.”

  “Fine, if you’re going to look at my kid photos, I want to see yours.”

  “You’ll have to come to Atlanta. I don’t have any here.”

  Reality hits as soon as she brings up Atlanta. Would I travel to Atlanta and make a life there if that’s what she wanted? Yeah, I fucking would. But who says that’s what she wants.

  She peels open the album and laughs when she sees my kindergarten picture. “Oh, my God, Jamie. You were so cute.”

  “Were?” I ask and pull her closer, until her warm body is meshed next to mine.

  “Now you’re handsome,” she says, her gaze moving over my face, lingering over the scar on my jaw.

  She flips the pages, and I sit up a little straighter, surprised to see my photos through the years, everything from kindergarten right up until high school. The last photo in the book is my high school graduation, probably because I skipped town shortly after. I’m a little touched that Gram put this book together for me. I don’t remember being photographed much as a kid.r />
  After going through every single picture and wanting me to tell a story of what I was doing in each one, Kylee yawns and closes the book, but a loose picture falls out.

  “Oops,” she says and reaches for it. She examines it, and then narrows her eyes. “Jamie . . .” she turns to me, her mouth agape, her eyes wide open. “Is this . . . ?”

  I take the picture from her and my heart goes into my throat. I stare, unable to speak or even breathe. Ice freezes my blood and I gulp air as chaos erupts inside me. Tears prick my eyes, and I fight them back as loss overcomes me, rattles me to my very core. Grief hits like a punch to the gut, and for a moment I let it wrap around me like a deadly snake and suck the oxygen from my lungs. I want to drop to the floor and curl up in it, let it consume me, eat me alive, but the hand on my face pulls me back.

  “Jamie?” Kylee says.

  “It’s . . . Dad,” I say and look at the picture again. I could never do right in the man’s eyes, had disappointed him so much when I left town. How long had he waited for me—all of us—to come back? We all eventually returned to Blue Bay, but it was too late to fix past mistakes. Was this Dad’s way of mending bridges, of showing me his support, that he might have actually understood my passion and been proud of what I was doing? Tears are falling down Kylee’s face when I look at her, and my wobbly heart squeezes.

  “Jamie,” she whispers and cups my face.

  Before Kylee, I’d never let anyone see my pain, my tears. But Kylee isn’t just anyone. I’m in love with her, and in my heart, I know what we have is the real deal. “I had no idea.”

  She sniffs and says, “He was proud of you, Jamie.”

  I take a shuddery breath and look at the two four-leaf clover tattoos on my father’s back, the names of his five sons and three nephews etched on each leaf. A big hiccupping sob catches in my throat and I briefly pinch my eyes shut. This was no small thing he did, and deep in my heart I know he did it for me. The clovers aren’t random, they’re a sign of luck, have a special meaning, and were chosen very carefully by my father. What this tells me is he understood what it was I did, and why I did it.

  “I never thought in a million years he’d get a tattoo.” I pull Kylee to me and press a kiss onto her mouth. My heart pounds hard against my chest, my thoughts on a roller coaster ride. I feel like I’m dying, yet so alive at the same time. One thing I do know for certain is I need to be inside Kylee again.