by Nikki Ash
Then he points to Bentley. “And you need to stop fucking around and take this shit seriously. Any more losses and you are going to be removed from this team. I can’t have you tainting my gym’s reputation. I signed you up to fight against Dante Cobalt. The fight is in two months. You need to win this. Understand me?”
Bentley looks like he’s about to rip my dad’s throat out so I jump in and tell him we understand so he will walk away.
Bentley turns to me fuming. “Bro, why the hell do you let him talk to you like that? If it weren’t for your reputation this gym wouldn’t be doing half as good as it is. It’s you that brings the people in. Fuck him!”
I get what he is saying but it’s pointless to argue with either of them so I just shrug my shoulders and head to the locker room to try to wash away some of this hangover. I need my mind clear if I am going to figure out my next move.
* * *
Liz
Kayla and I ended up talking through the night while enjoying our ice cream and wine. Driving over to Ashley’s to pick up Bella I can’t stop thinking about what Kayla said to me about Cooper. She’s right in a sense. He doesn’t know that he actually has a daughter. I think I need to tell him about Bella and leave the ball in his court. If he still doesn’t want anything to do with her then at least I can say I tried. I don’t want Bella to grow up one day and think I purposely kept her father from her.
I pull up to Ashley’s house and I am barely out of the car when Bella barrels out of the door leaving it wide open throwing her self into my arms. I pick her up and hold her tight as she pulls her head back and smiles big.
“I missed you sooooo much, mommy! Did you miss me?”
“You bet I did. I missed you to the farthest, brightest star and back.”
Her eyes go wide and bug out and then she starts to giggle.
“Mom, you are so silly. You can’t miss me that much. The stars are like infinity miles away!”
“Well that’s how much I missed you. Did you have a good time with Tristan?”
“Yes! We played Uno like a gazillion times and I won more times than him.” Her voice goes lower like she is telling me a secret. “But I saw he was getting sad so I let him win so he would be happy again.”
I look at her and feel so proud to call her my daughter. She is so caring and has such a huge heart. I can’t imagine not having this beautiful little miracle in my life. If Cooper doesn’t want her in his life, he’s the one losing out.
She hugs me again and thanks me for letting her spend the night here. I tell her she’s welcome and decide fore sure I am going to tell Cooper about Bella. Whether he wants her in his life or not he deserves the chance to make the decision.
Then it hits me… I left the party without getting his information, again!
After having coffee and chatting with Ashley we head back home to find Kayla passed out on the couch, limbs sprawled out, looking like she is barely breathing. This is what happens when she drinks too much.
Bella walks up to her slowly, places her fingers under Kayla’s nose, and smiles at me.
“Whew! Don’t worry mommy; I can feel her tickling my finger. She’s ok.”
I try not to laugh at the fact that my daughter just confirmed that Kayla is not dead.
“Bella, you are silly. Of course she’s ok. She just fell asleep on the couch watching TV. Why don’t you bring your backpack to your room and empty it out and I will make you some cereal.”
“Ooo-kay, mom!” She drags her backpack full of toys and clothes that she brought to Tristan’s last night down the hallways to her bedroom.
“Hey sleepy-head wake up!” I yell right in Kayla’s ear causing her to jump a half mile into the air and grab her chest like it’s about to explode. She looks around and then glares at me.
“Was that necessary? After I stayed up all night comforting you with ice cream and wine that’s how you repay me?”
I ignore her question and ask the one that’s been on my mind since I left Ashley’s. “You don’t by any chance have any of the guys’ numbers from last night, do you? I made the decision to tell Cooper about Bella and then realized I, once again, didn’t get his damn number.”
“You are in luck. I just so happened to get Bentley’s number last night.”
“Oh, awesome. Wait a second, you, miss no commitment, miss one night stand, miss no strings attached, miss never get a guy’s number or give him yours actually got a guy’s number?”
“Trust me, I didn’t ask for or want it. When I set my phone down on the counter to pour myself a drink he stole my phone and wouldn’t give it back without calling himself from my number so he could have mine! I was seriously pissed but it looks like it was for the best because now I can look in my call log and we can get Cooper’s number from him.”
She gets out her phone and pulls up the number from the recent calls list and hits call. She waits a beat and gets the voicemail. After a few seconds she hangs up and start typing on her phone.
“What are you doing?”
“I got his voicemail so I am texting Hayley to find out the name of the gym. Ok… here we go. She said it’s called Cooper Fight Team and it’s only ten minutes from here. Here’s the address. This should be something you do in person.”
She sends the address to my phone and it beeps with the text from her.
“Isn’t it crazy that for the last few months Hayley has been working with these guys and we had no idea?”
“Seriously!” To think Cooper was so close this whole time is mind blowing.
“Ok, just pull the address up on your GPS and head over there.”
I don’t think I can do this in person. It’s one thing to tell him about Bella over the phone where I can’t see his looks but to tell him in person feels like I am making myself too vulnerable to him.
Kayla must sense what I am thinking because she doesn’t give me a chance to protest. She is literally pushing me out the door as she yells for Bella to get her cute butt to the Kitchen to help make pancakes.
“Go. Go tell Cooper about Bella and we will be here when you get back. I got her. Everything is going to be fine.”
I really hope she’s right.
I follow the directions on my GPS and pull up to what looks like a state of the art gym. The building is huge and looks like it is three stories high. It is all by itself in its’ own complex. The entire front of the building is made of mirrored glass and there’s a huge sign that reads
Cooper Fight Team
Home of UFC’s own ‘The Rage’
Directly underneath it, is a life size Cooper in a fighting stance in gym shorts and nothing else. He has his hands up in fists and he is glaring in the photo. It looks so real it’s scary! I would seriously hate to get on his bad side.
I stand outside of the door for a few minutes staring at his picture trying to muster up enough courage to tell the man who told me less than twenty-four hours ago he doesn’t want a wife or kids that he does, in fact, have a kid.
Just when I finally decide to put on my imaginary big girl panties and go inside the door swings open and almost smacks me in the face. I jump back and immediately recognize the person holding the door open. It is the older guy from the other night, no wait, from last night. Jeez has it only been a day since the fight? This has seriously been the longest twenty-four hours, ever.
He clears his throat to get my attention and I smile at him. If I am right, this man could be Bella’s grandfather. He doesn’t smile back. In fact the glare Cooper has in that poster on the wall has nothing on the daggers this man is shooting me with right now. Instinctively I back up a little bit and get control of myself.
“Hi, my name is…” I am not even able to get out my name before this guy cuts me off. “I know who you are and I know who you are looking for. You are wasting your time. He doesn’t want anything to do with you.”
Well, ok then. I try my best to keep a smile on my face. “That may be true but I need to speak to him nonetheless. It
is very important.”
“Well, he’s not here and even if he was he made it clear he doesn’t want to speak to you.”
The way he says it leaves no room for argument so I simply say ok and walk back to my car. I am not about to get into a fight with this man. Something about him feels off.
Chapter Ten
Liz
The rest of the weekend is spent lazily lounging on the couch watching movies with Bella. Of course her latest favorite is Disney’s Maleficent so we have to watch it twice.
The second time we are watching it, when the mom dies Bella turns to me with a sad look on her adorable face. “Mommy, if you die who will take care of me since I don’t have a daddy?”
I look at Kayla and she gives me a small encouraging smile. I really need to tell Cooper about her. This isn’t about anybody but Bella.
“Angel, first of all, I am not going anywhere. However, if something did happen to me Auntie Kayla would still be here and so would Grammy and Papa and Uncle Mattie even though they live in Florida. You would never be alone.”
I hope this will satisfy her but of course it doesn’t. She is way too inquisitive to accept that answer.
“Ok mommy, but where’s my daddy?”
I have always known this question was coming but nothing prepared me for the pleading look in her eyes when she asks it. I am her mother, which means it’s my job to protect her and love her. It’s my job to make sure she always feels wanted and never hurts, especially when I can help it.
“Umm…” I am totally stalling having no clue how I am going to explain any of this to her. Thank God for Kayla’s quick thinking. “Oh my God Bella, I just remembered I have all the ingredients to make a batch of fudge brownies. Want to help me?”
Bella’s eyes light up and she jumps up and down cheering, “yes, yes, yes.” And she forgets all about the daddy question for now.
Of course when Kayla blurted out that she has the ingredients what she really meant was she has no ingredients. So now we are on our way to the grocery store to pick up the stuff to make the brownies. I can’t complain though because she totally saved me. I have no idea what I would have said to Bella about her daddy. There’s so much going on in my head but I know that the first thing I need to do is corner Cooper and tell him that he has a daughter, even if he wants nothing to do with me. Once I know whether or not he wants Bella in his life, I can figure out my next move to ensure my daughter doesn’t get hurt.
We walk up and down the baking aisle gathering up all the ingredients to make my mom’s famous fudge brownies and head over to the check out line when I hear, “Excuse me Miss, I think your daughter dropped this.”
I turn around to the familiar voice and stare right at the man who shares the same beautiful green eyes as my daughter.
I stand there for a second in shock as I see the recognition in his eyes. First, that it’s me he’s speaking to and then at the fact that he just referred to Bella as my daughter. His eyes turn cold and hard and I can see him visibly tense up as he’s placing all the pieces together in his head.
I take the raggedy pink stuffed flamingo from him gently. “Thank you.”
Luckily, Bella breaks the uncomfortable moment with her sweet little self. “Mommy, my flamingo! I didn’t even see it drop.” Then she turns to Cooper. “Thank you mister. I love my flamingo. Mommy gave me my flamingo when I was a little, little, tiny baby and she said it is very special to her because somebody special gave it to her. You know what else I love?” She doesn’t even wait for him to answer. She just keeps on going in typical Bella fashion.
“I love Maleficent. It’s my most favorite movie ever. And there’s a dragon in the movie. I want the dragon so he can be friends with my flamingo. I asked my mommy to buy me the dragon but she said I have to ask Santa. Do you know how far away Christmas is? Like a gazillion trillion days away. I will die before I get my Maleficent dragon.”
I laugh quietly at her ranting away to Cooper. It’s her favorite movie right now but by next month it will be something entirely different.
I must be smiling outwardly because Cooper cocks his head to the side like he’s waiting for me to fill him in.
“She has a different favorite movie every month.”
His one eyebrow shoots up and I realize that’s not what he was referring to. Oh shit. He wants me to address the elephant in the room, or in our case the adorable four-year old standing next to me.
“Mommy let’s go! You promised we would make Grammy’s brownies. Auntie Kay is in the car waiting for us.”
She grabs a hold of my hand to pull me away ignorant to the silent conversation that is currently taking place. When I don’t move, she looks up at me with a questioning stare.
At this moment Kayla walks over oblivious to what is happening. How she doesn’t see Cooper standing there boggles my mind. The guy is like a damn wall. He takes up so much space it’s impossible not to notice him.
“Hey Liz, what’s taking so long? I was waiting out there forever and now I am craving some vanilla ice cream to go with the brownies.” She laughs but stops when she takes in the intense situation in front of her.
“Oh, fuck” She spouts out before covering her mouth when she remembers there’s a little person right here.
“Ooooohhhhh, Auntie Kay! You said a bad word.” Bella starts wagging her finger at Kayla like I do to her when I am upset with her. Even though she is so damn adorable this does nothing to break the awkwardness surrounding us. Cooper is watching all of this probably thinking we are nuts.
“Yes, I did. I am sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. Bella, why don’t you come help me find the vanilla ice cream to go with our yummy brownies?”
She doesn’t wait for her answer as she grabs Bella’s hand and drags her along giving us both one last glance before disappearing down the aisle.
“Is she mine?” Well, damn, I guess we are going to dive right in. There’s no reason to deny it at this point.
“Yes, she is yours.”
“Did you plan to ever tell me about her?” Is this guy serious right now? Judging by the look on his face, I think he is dead serious. If looks could kill I would be in a puddle of blood on the ground right now. Well screw that and screw him. He has no right to be mad at me. I didn’t do anything wrong.
“When would you have liked me to tell you, Cooper? When I found out I was eighteen and pregnant with no way to contact you since you never gave me any information on you? Or how about the other night when you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with ever being a husband or father? Or maybe I should have screamed it from outside your gym when your asshole bodyguard told me that, according to you, I’m not welcome there and you want nothing to do with me. When should I have told you that we have a daughter? Huh, Cooper?”
His face softens for a second and then goes hard again. “What fucking body guard? You came to the gym, when?”
“Yeah, I did. I showed up yesterday morning determined to tell you about Bella and before I could make it in some asshole guy stopped me and told me that he knew who I am and that you want nothing to do with me. I had no choice but to leave. I was planning to try again but I needed to figure it out in my head how to handle it. None of this is going how I spent the last five years imagining it would. I would never keep your daughter away from you even if you don’t want anything to do with either of us.”
He looks so pissed I swear smoke is about to come out of his ears. That rage better not be aimed at me.
“I can’t believe him. I told him to mind his own business.” I tilt my head to the side confused. Is he talking to me or to himself?
“That must have been my father. He makes it a point to get into my business when it can possibly take my full attention away from fighting. God forbid, I do anything that messes with his potential income.”
It is clear there is huge animosity between Cooper and his dad and that saddens me. I can’t imagine not having my dad as part of my support system. It doesn’t matter
that he lives across the country. He is there for me in every way that matters, same as my mom. They have always been my two biggest cheerleaders supporting me, even from afar.
When I found out I was pregnant with Bella they begged me to move home so they could help me but I knew if I did I would never graduate from college. Bella and I try to visit them a few times a year and they come up to Las Vegas to visit us as often as possible as well. Since we are long distance Bella Face Times with them on the computer often.
I hear Bella’s excited voice coming back down the aisle and remember we are having this conversation in the middle of the grocery store.
“Look” I say quickly before she gets in hearing distance. “I tried to find you when I found out I was pregnant but I had nothing to go on. When we had sex I was on the pill. I just didn’t know it wasn’t effective yet. I’ve tried to tell you a few times since I found you, and I am sorry it never actually came out but I never kept this from you intentionally. When your dad said you wanted nothing to do with me, I thought you told him to say that. I was still going to find you to tell you, though. I get you don’t want to be with me…”
He attempts to interrupt me but I don’t have time to argue so I shake my head and continue talking faster.
“…But I would never keep a child from her father. If you want her in your life we can figure it out and if you don’t then that’s on you. I get you don’t want kids and a wife and I respect that. I know I should be sorry I messed up with my birth control but I’m not because Bella is my beautiful little miracle. You need to decide what you want and either way I won’t hold it against you. I just don’t want her to know anything until you decide. It would break her heart if she knew you knew about her and didn’t want her. So, think about what you want. None of this is Bella’s fault. Here’s my number.”
I grab his phone and dial my number into it and hear the ringing on my phone.
